EVA Sessions: You Can (Never) Trust
by Gob Hobblin
Summary: The Americans send a new-style EVA and Pilot to NERV-Tokyo. He seems to excel in all areas and qualities, a good addition to the team. Too good...frighteningly good. Shinji, Asuka, and Rei will find themselves tested not only by the Angels beyond the walls, but the Devils that reside within.
1. The So-Called Boy

"Why the hell do these things have such complicated names?" Tate Gunner asked, dropping the packet and glaring at his guest. The guest said nothing, inscrutable as always. Tate had just finished reading the account of the Pacific Fleet's encounter with Gaghiel, and the performance of the Second and Third Children in subduing the creature. "Gaghiel? Gag...I don't understand this. Explain the convention here, Kafkutz."

Mitchell Kafkutz shrugged. "They did pretty well for themselves, considering they were out in the middle of the ocean." He didn't address Tate's comments or question, and Tate suspected the man thought it beneath him. "In fact, we should count our lucky stars. It was advantageous the attack happened," he continued, which in itself was true. Tate leaned back, and closed his eyes in thought. It had opened a valuable opportunity for them to get a leg up on things in the world, _especially_ in regards to Seele and Nerv. Despite being the National Security Adviser, Tate should not have known anything about Seele at all, much less its intentions or plans. They had kept their presence a secret, and done so with enviable talent. And yet, Tate did know. He knew a great deal of things he was not supposed to, now. A lot of people high up the federal government knew, and they were working hard to play catch-up.

It had been a busy month.

"So, Mitch…you've heard."

"The Prime Minister of Japan made a request for Grendel, and its Pilot, in light of the increased Angel attention to Tokyo-3," Mitchell Kafkutz said in a matter of fact tone. The Adviser knew better than to try and hide things from him; he was, in fact, the source of a great deal of the knowledge that Tate possessed.

"Which allows us to finally insert our own asset into Nerv-1," Tate said. "Is the boy up to it?"

"The boy has been trained for something like this," Kafkutz replied. "He was part of the old Deveraux Initiative after the Second Impact." Tate grimaced, standing to pace. He was suddenly uncomfortable.

"Child soldiers. I don't know why we started that." Tate was a former Naval officer, and he had very specific ideas about how things were supposed to be. It was said that to have morals was a hindrance to a proper Security Adviser these days, but Tate had ignored that bit of advice.

"He's well trained, and intelligent. He's the proper age as the others, but he has shown a greater…maturity in making necessary decisions. We can trust him," Kafkutz insisted.

"Tell me about him."

"Samson Creed. That's the name we gave him, his birth name is irrelevant. He was raised at Fort Carson, top of Initiative in all marks. Hand to hand, tactical decision making, language retention skills. He will be a good asset."

"Loyalty?"

"Unquestioned. He's been conditioned, tested, proved. Samson will do what is required of him."

Tate grimaced. "I hate to ask, but does he have a military rank?"

"NATO O-3 equivalency. We say he's in the Army, but that's just for simplicity's sake. I would advise keeping up that cover story, especially in regards to the Second Child."

Tate looked at him quizzically, and Kafkutz continued, "The Second Child is competitive. Self-esteem issues, superiority complex. She ranks her importance based upon her position to others. We have two options: craft an identity for the boy that makes him nonthreatening, or make one that puts him out of her league. If we go the first route, he might not have the influence we desire. It's better to take a risk with the second option.

"Then we have the Third Child, who is about as assertive as a rodent, and just as eager to prove himself, and the First Child, who is…difficult to read. No personality whatsoever. Bland and blank, there. By introducing a Pilot who is important and assertive…that will egg on all of those flaws. That could be advantageous to us."

"Why is that?" Tate asked, wanting to see the thread of Kafkutz's thinking.

"He'll introduce and aggravate neuroses in these children that will erode and hinder their abilities, thus their use to NERV. In turn, his importance will increase."

"Which means he will have more responsibility, more trust, and thus a better position to provide us with intelligence," Tate said, seeing the strategy and not liking it. He hated using children as tools. "That will be very obvious."

"Not as much as you think. Ideally, once they see the ploy, it'll be too late to act on it. He'll be positioned well enough that it would be more damaging to remove him than to leave him in place. And he will have help, remember that: because of the Vatican Treaty, Japan can only have three EVA units. Grendel will therefore be a completely American mission, allowing not only a loophole in the treaty, but giving us a good support network to watch the boy."

Tate rocked in his chair for a moment. "Japan...is _still_ an ally..." he murmured.

"We don't want to spy on Japan. We want to spy on Nerv," Kafkutz pointed out. That was slicing things a bit fine, and it was a doubtful the Japanese would see it quite like that, but...still...

It _was_ a risk…but a worthwhile one. The appearance of Angels did not end the Great Game, and now that Japan and Germany were the new power plays on the block, the United States had to act appropriately. Especially because that power was based on something so...unfathomable. Tate considered that, in light of the new balance of power.

To say the United States had suffered from the Second Impact wouldn't have been entirely inaccurate, but to say that it hadn't benefited wouldn't be true, either. It had already been an astronomically powerful country…annexing the whole of Canada had doubled the size of the republic, as well as returned it to a status of hyperpower that it had maintained prior to the Event. It had given them remarkable leeway when dealing with the more assertive UN, as well as the other Nerv Pact countries. It enjoyed a level of prominence matched only by Germany and Japan _combined_, and that was due to Seele, no doubt about it. They were a national threat, as well as…

Something in the way they operated made Tate uneasy. It was the kind of nervousness that encouraged him to make leeway where his scruples were concerned.

"All right," he sighed, "It'll be worth it to see if we can deduce the intentions of Seele and…if they should be counteracted upon. I'll advise the President to go ahead with it."

"Thank you, Tate."

* * *

Dr. Julian Sefka received the news from Kafkutz with the outward appearance of calm. Truly, though, it awoke a wave of unease in him. It shouldn't matter, because he would do as the Group required of him. But, still…

He was always afraid to see the boy. He walked down the hallways of the dormitory, pushing that fear into a box. He would see the boy, share the news, and leave. Leave and let others handle it. Others with less insight into the child, and less reason to fear him. He came upon the dormitory room, leading into the only occupied apartment on this entire floor. Aside from rooms at either end filled with guards and listening devices, no one was on this floor…no one but the boy. Sefka made a fist with a convulsive hand, then opened the door.

"Samson?" he asked, entering the room. The boy was not there, but the bathroom door was open, and the light was on. Sefka stepped into the bathroom. The boy lay in the tub, along with as many bags of ice he could cram in with him. "Hello, Samson," Sefka said quietly, "Are you too warm?" Samson gave him an unreadable look, and said nothing. His hair was black and cut in a military style. His eyes were gray, and seemed devoid of anything one could call human. Despite that, they seemed…curious. Inquisitive. It was the only flicker of emotion on the still face.

"The President has agreed to send Grendel to the Japanese," Sefka continued, still standing in the doorway. "That means you will go as well."

"To be expected," the boy replied. It was a young voice lacking inflection, but something beneath it made Sefka feel an undeniable fear. Whether it was a fear of the boy, or something deeper, an awe…he couldn't say. As far as he knew, he was the only one who felt it. Of course, he also knew more about Samson than most would. "When do I leave?"

"Two weeks," Sefka said. He stepped into the bathroom and sat on the toilet seat. "Samson," he added, in a casual tone, "Do you remember…our little talk?"

"About the Group," the boy said, sitting up in the tub. He was fourteen, but he was not built like a fourteen year old should be. He had muscle mass that was well defined, well cut…and greatly more substantial than a boy his age _should_ have. On anyone else, it might appear attractive, but for Samson, it seemed…unsettling. Out of place. Threatening, even.

"Yes," Sefka said, feeling a bead of sweat on his forehead. "Yes, Samson, the Group. Do you remember what the Group wanted?"

Samson seemed to look through the doctor, going to someplace only he could perceive. "Adam?" he asked, his voice suddenly childlike.

"Yes, yes, Samson. Good boy, bright boy. You need to find Adam."

"That wasn't all," Samson added. His expression and tone never changed, but there was an ugly note under it. No…a sardonic one. A sadistic note, even. "There was…other concerns."

Sefka swallowed, and continued. "There are three children at Nerv-1, Samson. A boy and two girls. They are also Pilots. Samson…" Sefka slid off of the toilet, to the floor and on his knees. His hands trembled as he placed them on the edge of the tub, and a hint of pleading lay under his voice. "Samson…the boy _must_ survive. Do you understand? No harm can come to the boy."

"The girls?"

"Samson, focus now. The boy…must…survive."

Samson seemed to come back to himself. "The boy must survive." Sefka nodded vigorously. "And of the two girls? What is their importance?" The questions were casual.

"There is one with blue hair. She also _must_ survive. Do you understand?"

"The boy and the blue haired girl…they must survive. And the _third_ one?"

Sefka gritted his teeth, and said, hesitantly, "Just ensure…the boy and the blue haired girl…survive." Samson smiled slightly, and Sefka had to ball his hands into fists to keep them from shaking harder.

"Ah…in the two weeks…before you go…" he whispered, "We will…be educating you. Do you understand? There are…elements of your…personality. They need…minor adjustment. To avoid them from…asking questions."

"I understand, Dr. Sefka," Samson replied, his smile melting away, but somehow still there.

"I knew you would. You're a good boy, Samson. I'm very proud of you." He stood on shaky legs, if only to allow himself to leave with more dignity than crawling would allow. "If you are too warm, please tell me. We can arrange to cool you down."

"Thank you, Dr. Sefka. You are very kind to me," Samson said, sinking back into the tub among the ice bags. Sefka nodded, backing out of the bathroom. He closed the door, and fled the room, relieved beyond words.


	2. The Devil You Know

Shinji was scared of Asuka.

He was also irritated, aggravated, enraptured, and fascinated by her, but mostly he was just plain scared. He was scared of that look she gave that made him feel meek and small, he was scared of those strange, non-sequitor turns their conversations took. Most of all, he was scared of the occasionally violent outbursts she was capable of, like the one she was in now.

He wasn't entirely sure of what she was screaming about, as it was mostly in German, but she had thrown a hair dryer at him and cut his scalp. He cowered at the table as she continued to rage about…something, before retrieving the hair dryer and retreating into her room, sliding the door shut. He glanced over at Pen-Pen, who looked indifferently back, and went to his room, his scalp still bleeding.

She had only been here a short while, and in that time she had completely derailed the tenuous semblance of a normal life Shinji had built for himself. It was a crappy life, but it was still his, in a way. Now, she was here, in this apartment, bringing with her storm and confusion and lust…

His heart beat fast as he thought about her. She was a beautiful girl, probably the prettiest he had ever met. She wasn't the soft, enigmatic mystery that was Rei, but she was a fiery, burning ball of emotion that ate at him. She scared him, this was true. And yet…he liked the way she scared him. It was not the same fear he felt when inside Unit-01.

He heard her pacing in her room, and felt a warm trickle down his nose. He didn't touch the blood, instead letting it run as an intense feeling of self-loathing washed over him. He felt pathetic when she got angry at him, mostly because he felt it was his fault. It had to be; why else would anyone get angry with him if it _wasn't_ his fault? And it was made worse by his inability to find what he could do to fix it. He lay down on his bed, hating himself, hating the world, hating his father, hating life for all its wonder, as the evening sun slipped down and away and left his room a pink glow to match his moroseness.

* * *

As he slept, his dreams were feverish. He was sitting at a table in a field, across from someone. He couldn't make them out specifically, except that it was male. Very male, with defined musculature. The features were not there, but the smile was. It was a Chesire Cat smile, too big for the face and too many teeth for the mouth. It looked like it was an attempt to be friendly, but it made Shinji think of eating. Something eating, always eating. Maybe eating him. He shuddered in his sleep.

"Better the Devil you know, my dear," the shape said, without moving it's mouth. "Better the Devil you know, lovely thing. You'll know the Devil, you'll know him well. Better to know him, dear, love, tidbit." The smile continued to get wider, going up and around the head until it connected in on itself like a circle. The many rows of teeth cracked together, making an electric and metallic sound.

"Better to know me, better to know me, better to know me…" it chanted.

* * *

When Shinji awoke the next morning, he smelled cooking, which meant Misato was up and playing house mom. He knew without consciously deciding it that he would be eating cereal for breakfast. He sat up to see that he had gotten blood on his pillow case. Which meant it was still on his face, which meant Misato would ask questions he wouldn't answer. So, as quickly as he could, he slipped out of his room and hurried into the bathroom. Thankfully, Asuka was still sleeping, so he didn't have to fight for access.

He washed his face and thought of his dream. "Better the Devil you know," he mumbled, and felt ill saying the words. He had had vivid dreams before. Ugly, nasty things, reminding him of his own fears, but this was a strange breed of dream. It seemed to peer at him from the mirror, with those words…and those teeth…teeth everywhere. "Better the Devil you know," he said in a louder voice, staring at his face. He peered back blankly, and he grinned maniacally at himself, the reflection responding obediently. It repulsed him, and he left the bathroom feeling jittery.

"Good morning!" Misato sang, as Pen-Pen watched Shinji with what could only be described as contempt. He was entirely too spoiled on Shinji's cooking, and any time Misato was allowed near the stove was no less than cowardly treason as far as Pen-Pen was concerned. Shinji made a face at the penguin, and grabbed a box of rice cereal and a bowl.

"Hey, don't you want a hot breakfast?" Misato asked, pouring some beer into the skillet. It was only nine o'clock on a Sunday, and already she was drinking?

"I'm not very hungry," he said, and that was the truth.

"Still getting used to the new roommate?" she asked, a teasing note under her words.

"I had a nightmare," Shinji blurted, then bit his tongue. He did _not_ want to talk about Asuka, and had said the first thing on his mind, which happened to be the second thing he did not want to talk about, either. Misato gave him a concerned look.

"A nightmare? About what?"

"Just…weird stuff…" he stammered. "You know…nightmare…stuff."

"A nightmare, huh?" Misato mused. "You sure it wasn't one of those kind of dreams? I mean, you do have to attractive women in the house," she said, leaning over the stove in a seductive manner. Shinji blanched, and focused intently on his cereal.

"It wasn't a dream like that at all!" he whined. "Why do you have to be like that? Geeze!"

"Why is everybody so loud in this house?" Asuka screamed, slamming her door open. Clearly, she was not a student of irony. She stalked into the kitchen, and perused what Misato was cooking.

"What is that?" Asuka asked, squinting her eyes at the skillet.

"Sausage, hamburger, bacon, cornflakes, eggs, sugar, a little coffee, _lots_ of curry, and beer for flavoring!" Misato said cheerfully. Asuka had no words for that, and simply took a bowl and sat at the table, taking the box of cereal and pouring some for herself. "You're both no fun!" Misato snapped, stirring the mess. "Actually," she said, switching gears with a rapidness Shinji still had yet to gauge, "I'm glad you're both up. Word is we have a new Pilot coming in."

Asuka looked up, and Shinji could have sword her expression was one of fear. Before he could place it, it took a bland indifference. "Oh?" she sniffed diffidently, "Why? You already have me. That should be _more_ than sufficient, especially with the Idiot here." She jabbed a spoon in his direction. She still refused to acknowledge Rei as a thing that existed, and as far as she was concerned, the only Pilots were her (in her lofty heavens), and Shinji, who was an idiot but lucky. Very lucky.

"The Prime Minister got nervous after the whole thing with Gaghiel, so he asked the Americans to send over Grendel," Misato explained, heaping a big portion of her…whatever it was onto a plate.

"Grendel?" Shinji asked.

"Don't tell me you don't know what Grendel is," Asuka sneered.

"You don't!" he snapped back, tired and cranky enough to snap back. Asuka made an ugly face, and said nothing.

"Well…it…" she finally sputtered, then squeaked as Misato dropped a plate messily in front of her. She slid one to Shinji, as well.

"No more protests!" she said happily, "You two need to eat up! You're all cranky. Hot food will do you good! Anyway," she said, breezing on again as Shinji felt his pores burning at the sheer aroma of curry wafting up from the mess, "Grendel is an American EVA Unit. Completely homegrown, on a small sample of Unit-00 we loaned out. Mostly cybernetic, with just enough flesh to put up an AT Field."

She lit a cigarette while digging into her food. She made a face, and grabbed a bottle of hot sauce. "They say that it's more combat effective than Unit-02 is, but I don't know about that. The proof is in the pudding, they say, and it's untested. The Pilot, though…he sounds interesting. Here, it tastes better this way," she finished, giving a healthy heaping of hot sauce to both Shinji and Asuka's plates.

"Who is he?" Asuka muttered, something in the smell of the food making her feel queasy.

"Well, he's fourteen, like you two, but…get this…he's a commissioned officer in the United States Army." Asuka looked up in that look of barely contained fear again, bordering on panic, before fighting it down.

"That can't be right…it would take four years of training in order for someone to commission in the military, and even then, he would have to be eighteen. I don't think it's in their laws to allow that," she said, feigning smugness and not quite succeeding.

"They made a special commission for him, apparently. Signed by the President and everything."

"So it's not a _real_ commission," Asuka said, seeming relieved. "It's just an honor, probably because he's a Pilot. A little propaganda for the Americans to feel better."

"No, it's real," Misato said, "I had a hard time believing it myself, but they said he's to be considered a Captain. He even has a college degree, in engineering."

Asuka stared at Misato with an unreadable expression. "Can he Pilot?" she finally asked.

"That remains to be seen," Misato said with a shrug. Shinji continued to remain quiet, stirring the food in front of him. He was still unused to Asuka, and now a new Pilot was coming into the fold. He listened to her go off on some other tangent, apparently eager to change the subject to something that was _not_ the new Pilot, and he pondered the new development. Better the Devil you know, he thought to himself.


	3. We Are All Friends

"Samson Creed," Asuka muttered, "What a stupid name."

They stood in the main loading hanger wearing their school uniforms, since that was the only thing they had remotely like an actual military dress uniform. Asuka lilted to one side with her arms crossed, Shinji slouched, and Rei stood stock still as usual, showing the barest awareness of happenings around her. "It doesn't even sound like a real name," Shinji added. "It's like an action figures name, or something."

"Seriously!" Asuka griped, her irritation fed. "Samson Creed?" She made a snirking sound. "I hate him already."

"You hate everyone, it would seem," Rei said quietly, and Asuka shot her a dirty look.

"Oh, look at you. Did someone pull your string, doll? You're often so _quiet_," she grated. They had only just met, and gotten along about as well as Shinji expected them to...which was not very well. This current introduction to the team, so soon after her own arrival, had made her snippy in general, and Rei was bearing the greater brunt of it than Shinji. It was most likely because she didn't seem to care.

"Look at that!" Shinji whispered, and Asuka turned to look in his direction. The Grendel EVA was being wheeled in, and it was certainly something to see. Compared to the other EVA units, it was…stocky. A bit bulkier, with less finesse in its appearance. It was painted in swathes of digicam, all teals, blacks, grays, and greens the way the Americans liked to color their gear. It _looked_ like it was meant for fighting. A small group of individuals in green uniforms walked in alongside it as the massive caterpillar tractors conveying it continued on their slow, ponderous journey.

"I think that's him," Shinji said, spotting a shorter individual amongst the rest.

"Oh, God, he dresses just like the rest of them," she muttered. "This is going to be intolerable. Ooh, look at me, I get to wear a fancy uniform and drive a fancy EVA because I'm special."

"Seriously, what is wrong you?" Shinji sniped, as Misato walked up next to them in her own NERV khaki uniform.

"Kids, cool it," she said, all professional now. Shinji studied her, wondering how she could turn her NERV self on and off like that. Asuka looked up, as though to continue protesting, but grabbed that professionalism she herself possessed, and went quiet. The small group veered away from the Grendel and came towards them.

Shinji was good at reading Roman characters, and could make out which one was Samson by the CREED name tag on his uniform. Two black bars sat in the middle of his chest and the center of his cap. The rest of the soldiers around him had a variety of ranks, mostly bars or chevrons. He didn't look out of place among them, if not for the fact he was shorter than them. Still taller than Shinji, but shorter than an adult.

He seemed to be smirking, but his expression was blank. His eyes were steel gray, and what hair that could be seen under the cap was black. His face was handsome, if…well, there seemed to be something under it, like it wasn't complete, or all there. Shinji couldn't put his finger on it. The boy wasn't built like a boy. Toji was the most athletic boy he knew, and _he_ didn't have a musculature like that. It seemed…wrong.

Everything about the boy seemed wrong. Which was weird, because he didn't _look_ wrong. In fact, he looked handsome and well built, almost the male physical ideal. And yet…a word of warning seemed to creep through his mind. He felt like he was meeting a tiger…or a leper.

"Capt. Misato Katsuragi, I presume?" one of the older soldiers said. He had a gold leaf of some sort on his uniform. He saluted as he approached, as did the crowd.

She returned the salute, saying, "Maj. Richard Ennis, it's good to meet you." Shinji had learned a little about military ranks just from osmosis, and he knew that Ennis technically outranked Misato. By virtue of Misato's status as the chief operations officer here, though, she had operational authority. Still, she should have saluted him, regardless of that, but he beat her to the punch. It could be argued to be politeness, recognition of her authority here.

It also felt feigned, for all its warmth. Shinji felt an immediate wariness of this group. Misato was still talking. "Allow me to introduce the other Pilots. At the end is First Child, Rei Ayanami. Next is Second Child, Asuka Langley Soryu, and finally, Shinji Ikari, Third Child." Shinji swallowed nodding at his introduction but saying nothing. Asuka gave everyone an arrogant look, and Rei just stared straight ahead, seemingly uninterested.

"It's good to meet all of you," the Major said. "This is Capt. Samson Creed, who will soon be Fourth Child."

"Pleasure to meet you all," he said in a voice that sounded…too old for him. It was a boy's voice, but not a boy's voice, and the unreality of him struck at Shinji. He detected Rei's attention coming back to Samson, a slow turn of the head. He risked a glance at Asuka. She was bristling like a terrier, her chin stuck out.

Misato nodded, and the Major went through introductions for the rest of the command team. There were something in the range of seventy American service personnel attached to the Grendel, and these were simply those in charge. Shinji ignored the introductions to focus on Samson. The boy watched the Major with a sidelong expression, and carried a light smirk on his face. The more Shinji looked, the more he felt he wasn't looking at a boy…just…something pretending to be a boy.

Before he could decide what that was, a klaxon blared. "Emergency, emergency," a voice called, "Incoming Angel. All personnel, report to your duty stations immediately."

Samson looked up curiously, and the command group braced. It was the posture of people used to responding to emergencies, but unsure of what to do now without a protocol to guide them.

"I guess this will have to cut introductions short," Misato said. "I'm afraid you'll have to see to docking Grendel yourself. Kids," she turned to Shinji and Asuka, "Get moving." Shinji risked one last glimpse at Samson, and hurried on to the hanger, Asuka almost gleeful at the prospect of the Angel.

As they all ran, Rei continued to stand where she was, watching long and hard after Samson as he walked away with his team.


	4. Tension in the Palace

"Well…_that_ was embarrassing."

Misato turned the photo on its side, and shook her head. No matter how she held it, she couldn't find a good angle to process the double-compostie image of Units 01 and 02's feet jutting out of the water and the ground, respectively. It was cartoonish, ridiculous…and a little bit funny. Not that she was laughing, of course. Not with the Americans newly arrived. It was bad enough having the whole country call out Nerv on this little issue, but with guests newly arrived…especially guests arriving on the implication that Misato and her team _couldn't handle the situation_…

She snorted, rolling her eyes. She had to figure this thing out with Shinji and Asuka quick. Shinji was so passive, Asuka was so forceful…and both of them were going to have to find some middle ground if they were going to deal with this new Angel.

"Interesting reading you've got there," someone murmured in her ear, and she went red. It could have been a blush, and it could have been fury. Misato settled on fury.

"Piss off," she mumbled, tossing the photos onto her desk.

"That's not very neighborly," Ryoji Kaji teased, plopping onto her desk. He was always so confident…it was one of the features that made him so attractive to Misato, and one of the things that made her want to taser him into incontinence at this very moment. He picked up the photo himself. "Seems the Children are off to a rough start."

"You figure all that out on your own?" she snapped, her eyes closed. It allowed her to hang on to her venom a bit easier. When she looked at him, she had too many confusing and conflicting emotions rattle through her brain.

"I figured that out when I first saw them together," he said. Which was probably true: he was confident for a reason. People were kind of like books to Kaji. Jack-ass. "I bet our Yankee friends are making this a little frustrating to deal with, as well." Misato suddenly groaned and leaned forward, piling her head into her arms. She couldn't stay angry…not when she had so much irritation to vent.

"You'd think I'd be _happy_ to have the help!" she whined, her voice muffled by her arms. "I'm not, though…I just can't read these people." She sat up, looking up at Kaji. "I've worked with the American military before, but _these_ folks…I don't know, they seem oily for some reason."

"You got that impression, too?" Kaji asked. His smirk was gone, and his tone was all business. The switch surprised Misato, but also made him infinitely easier to deal with.

"How could I not?" she said. "Especially that kid…what's the deal with that kid?"

"Little wunderkind like our Asuka," he said, "Maybe more so. Do you know of any children commissioned in the military?" He jerked a thumb as if gesturing to someone down the hall. "They almost did the same thing with her, but I shot the idea down."

"What? Why?" Misato crossed her arms under her breasts, fixing Kaji with quizzical stare. Kaji gave her a withering gaze back.

"Seriously? I have to explain it?" he asked. "This is _Asuka_ we're talking about." Misato rolled her eyes, and held her hands up in surrender. The girl was smart…_too_ smart. And she knew it. If there was one thing that the girl had too much of, it was ego, and the _last_ thing she needed was one more club to beat over the heads of anybody and everybody in earshot.

"All right, fair enough," she conceded. "Which brings me back to _this_." She snatched the photo from Kaji, and he made a small noise of protest. She had cut the web of his hand yanking the picture away. As he sucked indignantly at the wound, she began tapping the photo with a thumb. "We've got a week, a _week_ before the Seventh Angel regenerates, and I don't know what to do."

"Obviously, you have to hit both halves at the same time," Kaji said through his hand.

"_Obviously_, but I need these two _nitwits_ to play nicely with each other in order to do it," she said.

"You could have both of them attack one core, and sortie Grendel against the other half," Kaji suggested. He regretted it almost immediately. It wasn't that Misato looked angry, but she looked like she was trying to force down a piece of rotten food. She shook her head.

"No, not if I can help it," she said. "I need a better reason to deploy the Americans, and frankly I don't…"

"Trust them?" Misato gave him a baleful look, and Kaji smiled despite himself. "Trust issues, still?"

"Shut up," she grumbled. It was a low-blow, and a talk they had before. Many times. She wasn't about to play that game right now.

"All right, just…here, you know those dance games?"

"Dance…games?"

"Like in the arcade. Dance pads, you have to hit a certain pad a certain way in order to beat the game? Do it in rhythm?"

"I know what they are!" she snapped, "Why are you bringing them up?"

"Make them play one of those things all week, every hour until they're ready to fight. Hell, make them do _everything_ together, in reason. Make them think and sync like one person." Misato's face skewed up, and she looked around as if seeking support.

"That is…patently…one of the _stupidest_ ideas I've ever heard…" she snapped. "However…in light of the fact that I have no _other_ ideas, we'll give it a shot. I mean, it's only the end of the world we're trying to prevent, right?"

* * *

"That's a stupid idea!" Asuka grated, her tone livid under the white lights of the briefing room. Shinji sat in a chair, silent as a mouse, and Misato had her hands on her hips, asserting her full authority.

"Got any other plans?" she snapped.

"Yeah, let me-"

"No."

"But-"

"_No_! I know _exactly_ what you're going to say, and no, you can't beat this thing by yourself, and simply having Shinji or Rei act as support isn't going to do the trick, either. You and Shinji are going to work together, you're going to do _everything_ together, you're going to think, breathe, and act like _one_ person, and by God, if I have to staple you two to each other to get it done, I will!" Misato leaned over the girl and glowered. Asuka glowered back.

"Um…" Shinji ventured.

"Don't say _anything_…" Asuka snapped, pointing a finger at him.

"What are you thinking, Shinji?" Misato asked, and Asuka hissed through her teeth.

"By everything…do you mean…" He waved his hands in a vague, helpless gesture. "…_everything_?" Asuka was the first to pick up his implications.

"You pervert! No! I won't do it! I have _dignity_!" she raged.

"No, you don't have to do_…everything_…in sync, but when we're not talking showering and using the toilet, it's sync training for you!" She filed that away as one more thing she would rage at Kaji about. The fact that she actually had to have a serious discussion on strategy and tactics involving _that_ was enough to make her want to chuck the whole thing out of the window and call it a day.

"Or you could let me handle it." Three sets of eyes turned to the door leading into the briefing room. Samson was just inside the threshold. His ACU top had been shucked somewhere, so that he was clad only in his tan undershirt. His hands were in his pockets, and his expression looked bored.

"What?" Asuka's tone was low, flat, challenging, dismissive, and threatening all at once. Misato resisted the urge to look at the girl, impressed she could put so much _flavor_ into her words.

"Unit-00 is a prototype. Unit-o1 is a test platform, hardly a full-combat weapon," he said, "And Unit-o2…well…"

"Well what?" Asuka snapped. "Think carefully before you finish that statement, Hurensohn." She had been referring to Rei and Shinji insultingly as First and Third, but she _refused _to acknowledge Samson as anything other than an outsider. They may have been 'beneath' her, but the other Children were Eva Pilots. For better or worse, that meant they were (in Asuka's mind) a class to themselves. Samson was an interloper. Never mind the fact that she herself was an outsider. That word, whatever it meant, had become her catchword for Samson. Misato decided she really should look it up.

"Unit-02, in it's design and combat abilities, is primitive compared to Grendel." His tone was even and hard to read. He withdrew a hand from his pocket and wiped his mouth, snuffling. The simple movement and the tan shirt all highlighted his over-sized muscles, and Misato felt that little warning quirk in her mind again. When she had first seen the boy, she had a hard time placing him in her mind. He looked like a boy…and a man…and it didn't really mesh which was which. Even now, he just looked so…out of place. There was something about him, his physique, that just…

She filed it away as Asuka found her voice.

"Primitive? _Primitive_?" She began to march forward when Misato gently reached out and snagged Asuka's collar. The girl still managed to pull Misato along for a few feet. "I'll show you _primitive_, you stuck up, beefcake, cross-eyed-"

His brow furrowed as Misato managed to clamp a hand over Asuka's mouth while picking the girl up and turning, positioning herself physically between the boy and Asuka. Shinji watched the whole thing with wide-eyes.

"Cross-eyed…?" he mumbled in confusion. He felt eyes on him, and he looked at Samson. The boy was studying him, his pose and expression disinterested…

The eyes made Shinji's skin crawl. There was something under them he didn't like.

"Thanks for the offer, Samson, but we're going to keep Grendel in reserve for this one," Misato managed, Asuka still growling invectives and insults despite the hand over her mouth. "We see this as an opportunity for Units 01 and 02 to try and form a tactical playbook. You understand, I hope?"

"Suit yourself," he said, his eyes flicking back to Misato. He smiled, an expression that seemed genuine and lacking at the same time. "Makes no difference to me. Just know that when it comes down to it, Grendel will solve any and all problems. That's what it's designed for."

"-cut you in ways you can't imag-" Asuka managed, before Misato clamped an arm around her head.

"I'll keep it in mind, Samson," Misato grated. "Thanks for the offer." Smirking, Samson left the room. Sighing heavily, Misato released Asuka, who began gasping for breath.

"What was the idea!?" Asuka growled. "You were smothering me!"

"Please…_please_…try to play nice with our American guests," Misato said. "And maybe I won't smother you." She turned and looked at Shinji. "Shinji? Shinji," she said. The boy had checked out for the moment,

"Baka!" Asuka snapped. Shinji flicked his eyes back to them. "Wake up! You're being spoken to!"

"Um…sorry." He blinked, as if he had woken up. "What's…what do you…"

"Stop talking, and let's go home before you give yourself a headache," Asuka sighed. "If we have to do this…" she swallowed, visibly gathering herself, "_…plan_…then we might as well get started as soon as possible. I can't believe we're doing this…" She continued to bemoan and bewail her situation, pushing Shinji out the door as he in turn protested the way she was manhandling him. Misato suppressed a smile as the two left, knowing that could all become very wearying. She rubbed her forehead, running the situation through her brain. She would pick up the game system in a few minutes, then deposit it at the apartment, once she was sure things were under wraps here.

As she left the briefing room, she instinctively glanced left, and then right for that American boy. What was it about him? His presence was rankling all of her military instincts at the Unknown, the Other, and she couldn't decide if it was a danger or mundane. She shook her head, hoping that whatever it was pestering her, it would reveal itself, and soon.

* * *

"This equipment package is of the charts," Dr. Ritsuko Akagi murmured, running her eye over the inventory. All the equipment associated with the Grendel unit were being cycled into the Nerv-Tokyo stores, despite severe protest from certain American quarters on issues of secrecy.

Currently, she was looking over the shoulder of Maya Ibuki, a computer technician and one of the key personnel in Operations' Command Staff.

"Half of these weapons look like they were meant for something else," she said. "Look at this one: Grendelsbane? That's a full-scale railgun. I heard that was supposed to be mounted on the newest generation of American aircraft carriers."

"Those are the only ships with nuclear reactors sufficient for powering a device like that," Ritsuko said. "It wasn't feasible before Second Impact. Put an extinction level event into play-"

"-Merry Christmas, defense industry," Shigeru Aoba said around a smile. Another one of the computer technicians, he, Maya, and a third technician named Makoto Hyuga (currently on site as the Grendel Package was processed through) formed the core of the Operation Command Staff.

"Some of this stuff…I can't tell if it's more advanced than what we have, or is just plain different," Maya mumbled. She coughed a bit as Ritsuko exhaled a breath of smoke, but didn't pull back. She was fixated on the screen, and unaware of the rudeness of her action.

"A little of column A, a little of column B," she said, "We had to form a lot of our arsenal from scratch. They already had some of these devices in the planning or theoretical stages well before we did. I can tell you that the musculature for their Eva is more primitive than ours. It's why so much of it is mechanical: it had to compensate." Not that she had been told that…Ritsuko had deduced that on observation alone. So much of Grendel was being kept from her and her staff that she _had_ to guess. It irritated her immensely.

"That might make it better than what we have," Shigeru said with a smirk, as he rolled up next to them. He couldn't resist playing devil's advocate. Ritusko glanced at him, and his coffee mug still in his hand. She dropped her cigarette into it, the most eloquent retort she could think of. "Oh, come on, really?" he asked in disgust.

"Machines can only compensate for so much. In the end, it can still break down: it doesn't matter beyond it's ability to penetrate an AT Field. That's what will make Grendel useful or not," she said, smiling gently. Shigeru shrugged, pouring his coffee into the trash. Maya smiled devilishly at him, amused by Ritsuko's actions.

"What has…you know…_he_ said about it?" Shigeru asked.

"The Commander has been silent on the issue," she said. "So I honestly have no idea what he thinks." She turned and left the Command Center, lighting another cigarette. That was a lie, of course: he might not have said anything, but Ritsuko knew exactly what Gendo Ikari was thinking. He didn't like these intruders, and he didn't like what he was getting from Section-2 on them as well, which was, in a word, nothing. They didn't expect the Prime Minister to make his overture, and they certainly didn't expect the Americans to jump into it with both feet.

Hell, they didn't expect the Americans to actually figure out how to _grow_ their own Eva unit, much less factor LCL for its storage. They had done it, though, and it was a testament to what they could do when pushed against the wall. Japan should know that more than anyone…Germany, too, for that matter…but it had still surprised them when it had happened, and how quickly it had happened.

That bothered Ritsuko, but probably not as much as Gendo's genuine and unfiltered anger and frustration on the issue. He had done an excellent job of masking it, but it was there, and Ritsuko knew, as only a woman _could_ know. Much as she didn't like it, she had a certain comfort from knowing that Gendo knew all things. It was like the belief in Santa Claus for a small child, reassuring and constant. The barometer by which reality was compared. To see him be so caught off guard, and worse, to see his own reaction to _knowing_ he had been caught off guard made Ritsuko very uneasy. She had let feelers drift among her contacts in Seele, and the same thing had come back.

No idea. No information.

She knew that, somehow, she would have to use MAGI to crack into this Grendel's processing system somehow. If she could get access to the boy, this Samson Creed, that would be even better. Somehow. As she puffed on her cigarette and wandered back to her office, Ritsuko mused, and plotted.

* * *

Grendel had been moved to its own portion of the Nerv facility, separate from the other Eva bays. Primarily, this was because Grendel was not like the other Evas, and required a completely different hanger to store and maintain. It was at least a head shorter than the others, and unless they wanted to completely submerge it, they had to place it in a chamber where LCL levels could be equally lowered. That meant a lower maintenance catwalk, among other things. They didn't have to completely build a hanger from scratch, but they did have to do a major amount of rework on preexisting areas. All footed by the U.S. government, of course.

Which meant that, as far as work on Grendel was concerned, only U.S. military personnel were allowed to get close. The ancillary equipment was one thing: that had to be moved to an area where it could be quickly and efficiently delivered to Grendel anywhere around the grounds of Tokyo-3. Maintaining a separate military mission for something like that was too difficult to plan. In the end, Nerv simply had to have control over that gear.

An individual Eva was a different story. It could be parceled away and guarded individually pretty easily, and frankly, there were certain individuals connected to Nerv that the Americans simply did not want near Grendel. Officially, that was because large swathes of Grendel were still classified. With a less pure sample of material to work with (begrudgingly given at exorbitant cost), the Eva grown was stunted, runty, and almost sickly. Massive portions of its musculature had to be cut away and replaced with latest-generation artificial protein musculature, of the kind seen in artificial limbs. It's nerves had been rewired via nano-therapy, or even by hand where they were large enough. Whereas all Evas were biological cyborgs, one could say that forty percent of any purely Nerv Eva unit was artificial. With Grendel, it was more along the range of sixty percent, even seventy. In many ways, the portions that were biological merely served as anchors for the portions that were artificial.

It meant that, at least on the charts, Grendel was faster, more durable, and more combat efficient than even Eva Unit-02, with more integrated weaponry and combat/defensive systems. It was, first and foremost, a weapon, and designed as a weapon from the ground up. On the charts, at least. In a conventional Eva-to-Eva setting, Grendel _might_ come out on top. That was assuming a lot of things came into play, in favor of Grendel.

That also was not counting for the presence of an AT Field. To be frank, Grendel had never fought an Angel. There was no telling what it would do when faced with that kind of an opponent. Further, there was more to an Eva than weaponry: there was the Pilot. Grendel was in many ways more advanced than it's counterparts, but it was also more primitive in other respects. The Entry Plug utilized by Grendel was not a cockpit, but a chamber, where the Pilot was more or less free-floating and stabilized in place with a complicated system of wires, LCL pressure, and gyroscopic restraints. This was because the Pilot of Grendel was meant to _be_ Grendel…his movements were mimicked and mirrored by Grendel on a grand scale. As a result, the Plug Suit for Grendel was a full-body affair, including an integrated headpiece to allow the Pilot to 'mate' with Grendel's head. This seemed advanced, on the outside, but one needed to look just under the surface to realize how primitive it was. The Nerv Eva's didn't use that system because they didn't have to. Synchronization in a Nerv Eva was done from a couch-like crash pad, and maneuvering was, ostensibly, done via two over-sized butterfly joysticks. The fact that the kind of maneuverability, finesse, and combat agility an Eva was capable of from such a system demonstrated how advanced that system actually was, in certain respects. Grendel had a very well-designed and overly complicated Pilot system, because they didn't have the know how to create something _more simple_. It was like the old joke of the American space program spending thousands of dollars on designing a pen that could write in the absence of gravity, when the Russians instead used soft-leaded pencils.

Tit for tat.

The man known as Maj. Richard Ennis was pondering all of this as the ugly visage of Grendel glowered down at him. He wasn't really a Major, though he had left the Army with that rank before moving over to one of the Alphabet Agencies. Which was irrelevant now; this was a joint operation, and his job was to ensure that there was a certain image conveyed by the mission. Grendel appeared to be an over-the-top machine, and Ennis had to ensure that it continued to look that way. That meant no local technicians could be allowed access to Grendel's core systems, among other things. They would probably learn enough just through communications with the unit in the field, but that couldn't be helped. All in all, Grendel wasn't the issue.

The _Pilot_, however, was another story.

"Have we found him yet?" he grumbled to his aide, a man with a Sergeant First Class's rank but was, like Ennis, only former military. He had come from the Marines, before vanishing into one black-box program or another, resurfacing to assist in this little farce. His name was Delacroix, and he had the typical look of a man in that line of work: short, motionless, and flat.

"Not yet," the man sighed. "He slipped his escort and went wandering. He could be anywhere in the GeoFront right now."

"We should have _chipped_ him like I suggested," Ennis grated. Delacroix shrugged.

"The paper pushers had a point. If we could track him, _they_ could track him," he replied.

"I know, but this kid…do _you_ like the idea of an investment like that wandering around unsupervised?"

"It is what it is, boss," he murmured. Free from the eyes of Nerv handlers, they had dropped military formality. Special operations units of many stripes, civilian or military, generally eschewed such behaviors. "I will say that I don't like the rumors I've heard about him."

"Where have _you_ heard _rumors_?" Ennis growled, irritated that there might be gossip in the mission. Most of these folks _were_ military personnel, and not privy to the deeper aspects of what was taking place here. Worse, some were civilian personnel masquerading as military personnel, as there were very few military job classifications that translated easily into 'cyborg demigod maintenance.' The point being that all of them, despite their professionalism and their patriotism, were not professional secret-keepers. It was entirely possible that some 'gossip' could find it's way to ears outside of their little group. Nerv was paranoid, and the local commander was more paranoid than most. They _were_ being watched, and the only reason that Ennis and Delacroix spoke so freely was because they had a small-filed baffler masking their conversation, and both had a talent for speaking with minimal lip movement.

"Of course," Delacroix said, turning into Ennis and directing his words to the man's shoulder. It would allow him a bit more freedom to talk while masking his mouth. "And not around here, if that's what you're wondering. I was in direct actions, bub, and we kept hearing about possible replacements for us. Lots of rumors…lots of nasty endings, too. Those kind of things never ended well for anyone, and I hear this kid may be the product of one of those programs. Can that end well for _us_?"

"We'll see. Speaking of playing with fire…" Ennis murmured, turning his head to the left. He felt like he was being watched, and he was right. High up, there was an observation deck with a massive piece of transparent plasti-steel overlooking the hanger. They had yet to get permission from Nerv to post American MPs there, which was certainly deliberate. Right now, there was one observer, and that observer was in a school uniform with a patch of blue hair on top of her head. "I'll level with you, D," Ennis murmured. "I get the creeps from that Samson kid, sure, but not _nearly_ as much as I get the creeps from her."

"Aye, aye on that, boss," Delacroix mumbled, following the gaze. Much like he had bristled when he first met the Samson kid, he had bristled when he saw that emotionless child. She looked like an albino, but that wasn't correct, either. Albinism didn't produce hair of that hue, or eyes of that shade. They weren't red or bloodshot…they were crimson, and almost perfect in their appearance, like jewels. Further, there was no sign of blindness on the girl's part. The entire thing screamed genetic engineering, and it was so obvious and such a violation of several conventions on human genetic experimentation, Delacroix had to admire the gall of Nerv to parade her around. Sure, Samson was (most likely) a gene baby, as well…but at least they had _tried_ to hide it, in their own fashion. That girl was just…

He shuddered. There was something so _wrong_ with all of this. He had done questionable things in his life, but that was the price you paid to allow the good people of America to sleep safe and sound in their beds. Nasty men did nasty things to nasty people so good people could live their lives. Delacroix knew that, and what was more, he _believed_ in it. This, though…this all had the taint of blasphemy around it, and for a lapsed Catholic like Delacroix, that was a hard feeling to shake.

"If we don't hear," Ennis murmured, "From Samson in fifteen minutes, grab some guys and go hunt him down."

"Anything to say to the handler?" he asked.

"No, it's not her fault. Samson's good…we should have given her a better heads up, maybe more people for the escort…" He shrugged. They had to balance between appearance and security, and five guys watching their Pilot's every movement was…suspicious, to say the least. "Maybe it's better for him to wander around, poke his nose into things, make…_friends_, if he even understands the concept. I just want to _know_ what he's doing when he's doing it!"


	5. Midnight In the Garden

**Notes from GobHobblin**: I have to point out major deviations from Episode 9 and what happens here, for a few reasons. I didn't want to, point for point, mimic the show. Further, with the presence of an American delegation (and an Eva unit made clearly outside the purview of Nerv), one can assume a 'butterfly' effect. Things happen parallel, similar, but slightly different. Maybe the arrival of one person out of place affected the decisions others made. Perhaps the presence of another being made from Adam has caused erratic deviations in the Angels' behavior. Anyway, just wanted to explain why things were as they were.

* * *

"I don't like it."

Whenever Keel Lorenz said he didn't like something, people sat up and took notice. Piter DeLarey knew this as gospel, more profound and real than any of the Hebrew Books or the writings of Mohammed. He didn't know if there was a God, but he knew there was Keel Lorenz, and Keel Lorenz was enough, for some.

"No one does," he said, speaking of course for the collective group that was Seele. He had _just_ enough knowledge of the opinions of the others involved in the group to be able to say that with a degree of truth. Even if he didn't, an idiot could guess as to the feelings of everyone involved in the project.

The Americans were meddling, and that was never good.

"The problem with an elephant in the room," Keel grated, "Is that when it starts to move, everyone is affected. When it's a _blind_ elephant…" The visored man sneered. "How certain are we that they won't affect the Human Instrumentality Project?"

"All indications show that their presence won't make a difference in the long run," Piter said, "But that's saying a lot.

"And our contacts in the American government? How much do they really know?"

"Our contacts have done what they could to block any investigations into Seele and it's intentions," Piter said, "And they've had a degree of success. That may be what hurts us in the end, though."

Keel nodded. He didn't need it explained to him; any conspiracy with the size and audacity of the Human Instrumentality Committee was bound to get some attention at some point, and it was certain that such attention would be looked at as more than rumors by some who had the means to cause problems. The United States had always been a concern, as had Great Britain, China, India, Russia…

The problem with successfully hiding a conspiracy, however, is that there were those whose function and role was to be paranoid. Any successful attempts to block or redirect attention to an issue was the exact thing that would _increase_ that attention. They had been successful…and others would look.

"Still," Piter said, "We can't say how much they know. Just that…someone knows _something_. This administration, as well…someone is pulling strings that we aren't seeing."

"Another conspiracy?" Keel laughed, a coarse and rough sound. "Of course the United States would have it's own conspiracy running things. Who is it? The Freemasons? The Illuminati?"

"We don't know," Piter said, and Keel's face went flat. That was a problem…more than a problem, that was frightening. For Seele to not _know_…

"Any indications? Rumors?"

"Something from somewhere in their deepest, darkest hole of military secrets. I think the boy is the key."

"The Fourth Child…" Keel grimaced. "Who is he? Where did he come from?"

"I thought he was a stunted adult when I first saw the images on him," Piter murmured. "It would seem the kind of thing they would do, to try and slip into Nerv. And yet…I think it's more than that. I can't find any record of family, parents, anything."

"I thought there was a record…" Keel ventured. The implication was clear to Piter.

"There are the public records, those released to Nerv. I've had some of our better men working through them. They're all fake."

"Fake? Hmm. So, they're either hiding his family for purposes of security, or…or…" He smiled. "He's artificial. Built from the ground up. Oh, I like that. What programs do the Americans have that focused on genetic therapy to that degree?"

"Again, deepest, darkest hole, Chairman," Piter said. "I don't know if we'll ever actually know which program or what was involved in creating this 'Samson Creed,' but it helps to know to what extent they're invested in infiltrating Nerv."

"It also means he has a mission of his own," Keel mused.

"Do we tell Commander Ikari?"

"No. Share no findings with him. The day I help Ikari scratch his own back is the day I'll walk on my own." He waved a hand in the air. "Let him figure this out on his own. He will, in time. And it will give us all that more room to maneuver if he becomes…rebellious."

"What about Grendel?"

"Grendel, Grendel…we should have never given them that sample." It was a mistake, and all conspiracies, even the best laid ones, made mistakes. The United States had made enough noise and offered enough money that Nerv was all but compelled to give them _something_ of Adam to work with, and even then that was supposed to only be within the American Nerv branch. Somehow, it had gone from there to a DARPA facility. There was no real concern, as they were extremely poor samples. And yet…and _yet_…the frigging Yanks had somehow gone and grown a full Eva out of them. It strained the limits of credulity, but it had happened, and now they had to deal with it.

"Keep an eye on it," Keel continued, "They like to beat their chest about the whole thing, but I'm certain that either Unit-01 or Unit-o2 is more than a match for that can-opener. And the moment…the _moment_…you hear anything more about this 'boy' and his benefactors, report them back to me. In _person_." Piter nodded, and left the Chairman in silence.

* * *

Toji and Kensuke had decided to give Shinji a wide berth for the week, as things were just…creepy, right now. That was their words, of course, not his. Granted, he couldn't blame them. He would be giving _himself_ a wide berth if he could get away with it…what with the…why did Misato say they had to wear _this_ outfit, again? Whatever the reason, he was trapped. Trapped with a girl who he was convinced had one purpose, one purpose in life, and that was to drive him crazy. Or murder him. Whichever came first.

"Oh, my _God_!" Asuka snapped, as they made another error again. As they had been all day. Things were just about as tense as they could be, and Misato had wisely decided to spend the lion's share of her time at Nerv-HQ, dropping by in brief intervals to ensure that they were still working and that there were two kids still alive in the apartment. She had placed Pen-Pen in charge, which Asuka had thought of as a joke…which had become less funny when it seemed that the penguin had, indeed, taken to his role as caretaker of the apartment very seriously. All in all, it was a perfect storm of stress, and it was reaching the tipping point. Even Shinji, normally pensive and withdrawn, had given into his frustrations. As good as Asuka could give, she was getting all of it back in return.

"Can you stop shouting for one minute? Or five seconds? I'll take five seconds!"

"I don't shout!" Asuka shouted. "I am passionate when I speak!"

"Does everything have to be a contest with you? You have problems! You have serious issues!"

"I have issues? _I _have issues?"

"Yes, you have issues!" Shinji raged. Asuka opened and closed her mouth for a few seconds, surprised that he had actually stepped in and cut off her rant before she could wind up. She regained her footing, for better or worse.

"I…you should look at _yourself_! You…here you are, as a Pilot, an Eva Pilot, and all you do is whine and moan and just take it all like a brat! I am a Pilot of unparalleled talent and skill, and here I am having to try and match movements with a brainless imbecile like you."

"Maybe you wouldn't have such a hard time matching up with me if you weren't such a self-important jerk who bosses everyone around!"

"Oh, right!" Asuka snapped. "You're so meek and quiet with everyone else, but you have to question and double-guess everything I do! Why is that? Huh?"

"Maybe it's because no one else drives me out of my mind! Like you! Because you're _insane_!" he screamed, disappearing into his room and closing the door. He turned off the light and stood in the darkness, feeling his hands trembling. It was a new experience to get this angry, and he didn't think he liked it. In the midst of it, he didn't really care, but afterward…it scared him.

He was scared of being angry.

* * *

The boy slept fitfully. He had refused to join Asuka for anymore training, and he hadn't come out for dinner. He was mad, and he went to sleep mad. His dreams had been filled with meat lockers with long lines of gurneys. On each gurney was a copy of himself, and as he walked between them, they all sat up and watched him. Their heads tracked with his movement. He wanted to run, but all he could do was walk, as each copy stared at him. Stared at him stared at him…stared…stared.

He whimpered as he woke, his ears stuffed. He had worn the SDAT headphones to bed, the player long since turned off. He didn't remember turning it off. His eyes adjusted to the dark, and wondered why he kept listening to it. He hated it. He hated the music, he hated the player. He hated his father. He hated Asuka. He hated the Eva. He hated himself. He hated it all. Why keep playing the SDAT, playing this…stupid…

Asuka was four inches from his face. Asleep. Snoring lightly. Why…why…why was she _here_?

For a moment, he had the very real fear that he was in her bed, in her room. Slowly scanning, he recognized his ceiling, his sheets. She was _here_…in _his_ bed. He felt his heart racing. She smelled…very nice. Her expensive shampoo flooded his nostrils, and he felt butterflies. No, not butterflies…a whole hurricane was in his stomach. Her lips were very close…very soft. It was strange…he was fairly certain he despised her…but she looked so good up close. So pretty. So beautiful. That loathing was being replaced with desire, and he wanted to just…ever so lightly…touch those lips. He began to shift forward, trembling, closer to her. Closer…

She called for her mother.

He pulled back. She was a kid, wasn't she? She was a kid, he was a kid, they were all kids, this was just bad, bad, _bad_. He swallowed, feeling a strange mixture of guilt and shame for wanting to kiss her, for nearly kissing her. For piloting the Eva…how was it that wanting to kiss a girl and piloting an Eva seemed to form up in his mind?

She was a kid. He was a kid. They were children.

He wanted to get up. Get out of the bed, sleep on the floor. He started to tense, preparing to stand. He closed his eyes, and thought. He had a choice. Go back to sleep, and let her deal with it when she woke, or simply go sleep on the floor. If he did the latter, she would know that he had woken, seen her, and left her alone. He kind of wanted to. He was still angry at her.

Mother.

What if he stayed? What would happen if he…just went back to sleep? She'd yell at him. That was a fact. Would she? Maybe she would, maybe she wouldn't. Shinji had a tendency to be indecisive, and he knew that. He also had a tendency to make bad decisions. Stubborn decisions.

Decisions that hurt him.

The question, really, was not between choosing one action or the other, but choosing between action and inaction. One carried the chance of disaster, and the other…maybe, maybe not. He didn't know which was which.

Leave…or stay.

It was…nice having someone close by. Even if he hated her. He closed his eyes, and let himself drift back into sleep. There were no more meat lockers and gurneys.

* * *

Rei stared at the book in her hands. The clock said 1:21 AM, but she had not gone to bed. She hadn't even changed out of her school clothes for the day. She hadn't felt tired, and had sat up all night, focusing on the words. She wasn't reading them, wasn't even aware of them. They were simply something for her eyes to look at as she thought. And she had much to think about.

She had seen the American Eva, and she didn't know what opinion to form concerning it. All of the other Evas…they had a resonance, a note to them that she could hear or taste. It wasn't something she felt inclined to share with others. There weren't many things she felt inclined to share with others.

The Grendel Eva…it had no resonance. It had no note, no tone, no…being. There was something about it that seemed subdued, empty…dead even. It wasn't, and only a little more teasing had revealed the…presence under there. If it could be called a presence. It was strange, and worrying to her. She knew nothing about the boy who was supposed to pilot it, and in truth she could care less about him. The Eva, though…the Eva…

The Eva…

Closing the book, Rei stood and walked to her window. What was there underneath that armor? She shuddered, not knowing what the motion meant, or even why she had done it.

* * *

"How long has he been like this?"

"Fifteen minutes," Ashley Merritt murmured. Ennis had been woken up at 0140, and he was irritated, but he _had_ told the handler to bring any and all behavioral anomalies to his attention. This certainly counted as one.

The Americans had been given a secured portion of the GeoFront for use as barracks and dormitories, closed off from the rest of the facility. Before the command team and Pilot Support Staff had moved in, engineers had gone through and prepped a suite for their use. That included fitting a battery of hardwired cameras and other devices throughout Samson's quarters, for observation purposes.

At the moment, the boy had been in the process of standing up from his desk…and he had stopped. He was now halfway crouched over the table, as if frozen in time. He hadn't so much as moved a muscle for fifteen solid minutes.

"This isn't a glitch? A looped image?"

"I sent a pair of MPs down to knock on the door at thirty seconds in. The sound was registered on the feedback. As if _that_'s not enough, I took a look at biometrics, mass readings, and thermal imagery of the room. He's been standing there like that this entire time. I don't know if he's fallen asleep on his feet or…what." Merritt shook her head. She was an accredited Army psychologist, and given full reign in handling and observing Samson. At the same time, bizarre amounts of information had been kept from her, and she was in the dark about as much as Ennis was.

"All right, well-" Ennis began, then gasped as Samson began moving again, finishing his motion and going about his business as though nothing had happened. "The hell was that?"

"This isn't all," Merritt mumbled. "I took a look at his health readouts from when he was in the bathroom earlier. Soaked in a tub of water for an hour."

"That's not…"

"He stuffed bags of ice into the water. I don't even _know_ how he got the ice, probably stole them from the commissary. He was in water that leveled out at 30 degrees Fahrenheit for an hour. How does he not have hypothermia?" Ennis stared at her for a moment. There was a fantasy that had been running through his head for the past couple of days, and it involved the nameless bureaucrat that had planned this mission, duct tape, pliers, and a car battery. "Now, I have to ask again. Considering that it is a matter of record that a Dr. Julian Sefka had the most experience with him…Samson? Why is he not here?"

"He made every effort not to come. He's also the reason we know so little about this kid," Ennis grumbled. "We've been assured he won't be a problem. I'm starting to doubt it. Oh, look." He jerked a chin back to the screen. Samson was opening the door to the bathroom, and he had stopped again, in mid-step as if frozen. "He's at it again. God, God, God…" he rubbed his eyes. "What if he starts doing this tomorrow? In public?" He had certain things he had to learn from these Nerv folks, and he couldn't do that unless Samson could sell the part. If the kid started licking the paint off of the walls or chewing on the carpets, that wouldn't really endear them to anyone here.

"We'll deal with it," Merritt said, shrugging. "That's all we can do. We'll just…deal with it." When she said that, the boy's head snapped towards the pickup with a speed that made Merritt flinch next to Ennis. The boy looked around, slowly for a second, as if tracking an insect through the air. He left the door opened, and walked to his bed, where he lay down and went to sleep with the lights on.

"Yeah," Ennis said, not feeling tired anymore. "We'll deal with it. Great plan." He shook his head and left before anything else reared it's head on the screen.

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin**: Again, thanks to leroygordon for the phrase 'rug-chewing insane,' which I am determined to use in every way, shape, and form that I can…just because I love those words. And Happy New Year, FanFic Fanatics!


	6. Mnemonic

**Notes from GobHobblin**: I've tried to use the 'I don't shout, I speak passionately' line to my wife. She doesn't think it's very cute. I also lose a lot of arguments. There might be a correlation.

* * *

"They're bickering again, they're always bickering, why won't they stop _bickering_," Misato was mumbling under her breath, scratching furiously at her scalp. She could feel Kozo Fuyutsuki behind her, staring at the screen. How many other jobs did you have not one but _two_ bosses, and both of them were always standing less than a few feet away, watching it all unfold? Thank God Gendo Ikari was still hiding away, moping about the Americans. Plotting, actually, but something about him _moping_ made Misato feel better about the situation. Not that there was much to feel better about.

They were watching the video feed, displaying the inelegant heap of Evas lying inside the crater that marked the final resting place of the Seventh Angel. The two Children blamed each other over who entangled who via their emergency comms units.

"Well, at least they succeeded against the Seventh Angel," Fuyutsuki sighed. "Now if they could just stop embarrassing us…"

"I don't think they did all _that_ bad," Ennis said, and Fuyutsuki bit his cheek. It was easy to forget that there were other people present these days, especially when those people tended to be so quiet. It only reminded him that the head of the American delegation was witnessing this little argument. "And they _are_ just kids. What do you expect them to do, act rationally?" He shrugged, flicking his wrist. "Let them argue, they'll get it out of their system."

Misato wished that was true, as she tiredly reached over Maya's shoulder and cut the sound. These two just seemed to feed each other's fire, though, for better or worse. They pushed each other's buttons even when they weren't trying to, and in the end it always led to friction. She mentally winced when she realized it reminded her of herself and Kaji. Shaking _that_ thought out of her head, she turned to Ennis.

"I hope you aren't miffed about missing out on this op," she said, trying to sound friendly. The man shrugged.

"We don't have a terminal seconded to us yet, we haven't synched Grendel's operating system with MAGI, and we haven't had a chance for the Pilots to work together. It would have been a disaster."

"Samson seemed interested in taking a crack," she ventured.

"He's a doer. If he thinks something isn't getting done, he'll want to handle it himself," Ennis said, and something about that just didn't seem true. It occurred to Misato that Ennis might not actually know the boy all that well. She had nothing but instinct to base that on, but she had instinct where it counted.

"With luck, he'll have an opportunity the next time an Angel comes around," Fuyutsuki murmured. What a laugh it would have been if Gendo had heard _that_. Playing nice to the Americans was something he was determined to avoid, so he had left that to Fuyutsuki.

"We'll see," Ennis said, shrugging. He studied the image of the tangled Evas, the extraction equipment slowly moving in. Fuyutsuki studied him, the American's face unreadable, and he wondered what lay behind that mask of serenity.

* * *

"Why can't we go? It's _Okinawa_!" Asuka whined. She was looking at Shinji, expecting some sort of backup, but he watched things quietly. She could have strangled him, right there, but more important matters were at stake. Namely…_Okinawa_!

"Three reasons: one, because you're both Pilots, and we need you on standby in case there's an Angel attack," Misato began, "Two: because Grendel is still not online as of yet, we can't just say the Americans have the watch, and don't deny that _that's _what you were about to suggest. And three: these." She held up two report cards, and Asuka's mouth popped shut. Shinji's head sank like a turtle's trying to retreat into it's shell.

"Where…where did you happen to find those?" Asuka said in a false attempt at breezy innocence.

"Never try to hustle a hustler," Misato said.

"What does that mean?" Shinji asked.

"It means I'm the adult, you're the kids, and I know all your tricks before you even _think_ of them," she snapped through a snarky grin. "You're going to study, you're going to bring these grades up."

"But…I have a college degree!" Asuka said weakly.

"Then this will be _easy pickings _for you, won't it?" Misato said in a syrupy sweet tone. She pocketed the cards, turned on her heel, and walked away, leaving the two kids in the corridor.

"You said you hid those where no one would find them," Shinji pointed out.

"Don't try to pin this on _me,_" she snapped, "I wouldn't have had to if you weren't such an idiot with math."

"You were failing, too!"

"Why didn't you back me up?" Shinji blinked.

"W…what?"

"You wanted to go to Okinawa, too. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because I expected this," Shinji said. "Why didn't you?" It was a question, he noted, that Asuka had no ready answer for.

* * *

Seeing off their friends had just made the sting deepen a bit before Asuka dragged him back to the GeoFront. She had that determined, almost manic air about her that came whenever she was putting herself in charge of something.

"There's an Olympic swimming pool in the gym down there," she said, pleased with her discovery. "I'm going to wear my swimsuits one way or the other. You need to tell me how they look."

The thought of swimming made him queasy, and he tried to protest. He wasn't a strong swimmer, and he suspected Asuka had the grace of a dolphin. It would be one more thing for her to hold over his head. Protests meant nothing, however, and she dragged him all the way there, her new suits in a duffel under her arm.

"Why don't we invite Rei?" he pleaded, trying to find more excuses to avoid having to go near the dreaded water. "She didn't get to go, either."

"Did you see her when we said goodbye to everyone?" Asuka said with a sneer. "Of course not. _Because she wasn't there_. She's been stuck on that new American Eva. Grendel…good grief. What a brute…nothing compared my resplendent 02! I don't know why she's obsessing over it." It occurred to Shinji, in that moment, that he _had_ seen very little of Rei. It had been easy to miss, with Asuka loudly in his face all the time, and it bothered him that he _hadn't_ noticed. There was a lot going on, and somehow in the press, Rei had been pushed out. He stopped, and was almost pulled off of his feet as Asuka continued. She turned, and stared at him.

"What?" she asked.

"Rei's one of us, right? A Pilot?"

"Well…I _suppose_ so."

"So," Shinji ventured, "She should be hanging out with us. It's only right." Asuka gave him a withering look, but Shinji stood firm on it. She sniffed.

"Fine. Later, though. I don't want to go anywhere _near_ that Grendel beast to try and fetch her," she said. "Besides, I want you to tell me how I look without distractions."

"Distr…what? How you look?" He was confused, and a little dismayed as she started up again. They were getting closer to the pool, and he could smell chlorine. A whole litany of childhood fears bubbled to the surface at the smell.

"This is gonna be great. I can't wait to hear what you have to say," she beamed, pushing open the double doors. They both slid to a stop just after passing the threshold. The American boy was there, staring at the water. Just…staring. They both stood as quietly as they could, something unspoken and mutually shared among them urging them to avoid being noticed. Shinji slowly turned to Asuka. She was glaring at the boy's back. Slowly, she turned and walked out.

"Come on, Shinji," she said. "Let's go do something else." A part of him wanted to protest, to say they should at least _try _to be friendly to the kid. Looking back, though…what was he _staring_ at? He just seemed so focused on…nothing.

"Yeah, we've got studying to do," he whispered, and flinched when the boy half-turned in his direction, before focusing on the water again. He was muttering something…as if he was having a conversation. With the water. Shaking his head, Shinji followed Asuka through the door and left the boy to...whatever it was he was doing. When they were a good ten feet back into the hallway, Asuka shuddered from head to toe. Shinji looked at her curiously.

"What?" she asked, as if she had done something perfectly normal.

* * *

"…never going to get a chance to show off these swimsuits. Maybe I could model them for you later?" Asuka said, leering at Shinji. At least he thought she was. Was that what a leer looked like? All he knew was that she had made his insides start twisting. He _really_ wanted to find Rei, hoping her presence might make Asuka less aggressive. That would be too obvious, though. For the time being, he was trapped. They were in Misato's office, where she could find them if necessary. Shinji sat behind her desk, his physics homework in front of him. Asuka had made a point of _not_ pulling out a single textbook.

"Uh, why would you want to do that? I don't know anything about swimsuits and fashion and-"

"Just stop talking," Asuka grumbled. "You're such a buzz-kill."

"I don't know what that means." The words were English, and a term of slang he had not heard before.

"It means you're boring. What kind of dunce doesn't know what 'buzz-kill' means?" she snipped.

"It sounds really weird when you drop from Japanese to English like that," Shinji commented, trying to redirect the conversation. Asuka rolled her eyes.

"Just…what are you studying?" she asked, planting her hands on the desk.

"Math with letters," he mumbled. "I don't understand any of this…"

"Let me see," she sighed, hopping up and circling the desk. She leaned over his shoulder, pressing her chest against his back. He felt his mouth go cotton-dry, and his heart began racing. Her hair had brushed his ear, he could smell the shampoo, was she wearing _perfume_…?

"Qh, Qc…this is thermal expansion. Don't you know anything about that?" she asked. "That's easy stuff." He shook his head. Sighing, she pushed off of him, and circled the desk. "If something gets hot, it gets bigger. If something gets cold, it shrinks. Need a demonstration?" Something about the way she said that made Shinji very much _not_ want a demonstration. He felt if a cat could talk to a mouse, it would be the sort of thing a cat would say.

"H-How do you know about this stuff? You're failing just like me," he mumbled.

"Went to college, remember?" She crossed her arms. "I'm failing because I can't read the characters. Kanji is a bad way to convey information."

"No, it's not. Not if you can read it," he said, flipping through his book. The room had gone silent, and he risked a glance up. He froze in place, as Asuka was now leaning over the table and inches away from him.

"Are you calling me stupid?" she asked.

"N-No, I didn't…say that at all!" he stammered. "I just said…you know, if you can _read_ it, you might find kanji…you know, useful."

"Of _course_ I would find it useful, I'm in _Japan_. It'd be _nice_ to understand street signs on occasion," she snapped. Shinji found his mind racing, seeking some way to defuse the situation.

"I could tutor you," he offered. _My God, what have I done_? She crossed her arms and gave him a curious look. "I mean…you could…" he glanced around the room, then back at the homework on the table. "Tutor me on this stuff, and I could help you with your kanji lessons. Right?" She cocked her head to the side, like a dog hearing a whistle, and pursed her lips.

"I don't know…" she said, "Seems kind of demeaning to take any kind of instruction from a kid like you."

"Why would…" He sat up, something ringing in his brain. "I'm a year older than you." Asuka went a shade of pink, and her eyes went wide.

"Uh…wh…how do you know that? I mean…what makes…?" she was stammering. Shinji shrugged, and smiled despite himself.

"Misato told me, she said you were like a year younger than me and Rei," he explained. He leaned back in the chair, looking very pleased with himself. She fumed to herself for a moment. "I'd _like_ to help you with your homework if you don't mind helping me with mine," he ventured. She gave him a sidelong glance, and shrugged.

"Fine, whatever, I don't care. Not like you'll understand it anyway," she grumbled. Shinji hated to admit it, but she was probably right.

* * *

Gendo Ikari could have been carved from stone, and he would have been a more expressive man. Despite that, Ennis could detect waves of resentment being directed at him from across the table. He knew people like books, the benefit of a career in the Infantry followed by human intelligence gathering. Gendo wasn't a master at intrigue, Ennis suspected…but he was a learned amateur. And oftentimes, those 'learned amateurs' were far better than the professionals when it came down to it.

"Mount Asama?" he mumbled. "How strange we failed to notice." On the screen, a thermal image showed a sea of red, with a slightly cooler patch right in the center. An Angel in utero…and it's womb was the closest thing to hell on earth. An active volcano…incredible. Pushing aside his secret mission for his more overt one, Ennis turned to the issue at hand of dealing with the extraterrestrial threat to mankind. And at current, they had discovered an _unborn Angel _inside an active volcano. Life with it's little surprises…

"So we have a chance to knock it out before it…hatches?" he ventured. Was 'hatch' the right term?

"Yes," Misato said cheerfully. "This is an opportunity we can't waste. We can hit it before it presents itself as a threat."

"No," Gendo said, placing his hands flat on the table. "No, that's not what we'll do." Ennis cocked his head. Gendo glanced at him for a moment, the one overt betrayal of his loathing for the man's presence, and continued on. "This Angel is not a threat, as of yet, and we could easily dispatch it. Just as easily…we could capture it." Misato's face blanched, but he continued. "Imagine what we could glean from studying a captive Angel."

"Imagine the danger if it matures in captivity," Misato said.

"That's the decision. I'll let you plan the details. Unless…" his eyes quirked. "Our friends from across the ocean have a suggestion?" Ennis shook his head. He was inclined to agree with Misato…but he didn't want to set himself against Gendo too early. Better to stay under the radar. "Then it's settled," Gendo said. "Good luck with your capture operation, Captain." Misato looked like she wanted to say something else, and then excused herself. Ennis followed, grumbling his good-byes to Gendo and following her out.

"For the record, I think you're right," he said in the hallway.

"Then why didn't you say anything?" she hissed.

"Does that man look like he cares what either of us think?" he reasoned, trying to keep pace with her. She was walking angry, and even the long-legged Ennis was having trouble matching her stride. She sighed, coming to a halt so abruptly that he almost ran over her.

"Could Grendel handle this op?" she asked.

"After the networking is completed today?" he asked. She nodded. "No." She crossed her arms, her expression inviting an explanation. "We don't have the sufficient equipment to survive a dip into the pressure and heat produced by an active lava flow. Do you?"

"Yes, actually," she said. "I'm surprised you lot don't."

"When would we need to do that?" he asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Oh, come on, you had a plan for invading Canada. You _did_ invade Canada," she said accusingly.

"Yeah, well, Canada wasn't on fire and under crush-depth pressure," he hissed. Misato shook her head, and then laughed. Despite himself, Ennis smiled as well. You never wanted to make friends with the people you were scamming for information, especially if you hoped to make assets out of them. Too friendly with an asset, and you wouldn't be able to cut the chord when necessary. Still, a human was only a human, and Misato was an attractive, flirtatious woman. And Ennis was only male. He had to admit a grudging admiration and attraction to the woman, even as he recognized the danger inherent there.

"We have a D-Type package tailored for Unit-02," Misato said. "I would offer it for Grendel, but…"

"Grendel's a runt. You'd have to rebuild the entire package just to get it to fit," he said. "No, we'll sit this out, again."

"All in all, you Yanks aren't looking too useful right now," Misato sighed. Ennis shrugged.

"Say that again when we pull your fat out of the fryer," he chided.

* * *

As he spoke, Grendel was making it's final uploads into the MAGI computer system, sending up security packs, communication keys, and all the other necessary interface/recognition software needed for Grendel to be a part of MAGI's Eva-Net ops. As this was happening, subroutines implanted by Ritsuko began peeling through Grendel, to find that there were certain areas on the Net, but off-limits to outside perusal. They were not firewalled: they were physically disconnected. Only through a manual switch could those specialized hard-drive packets be accessed, and that had to be done from the Eva itself.

While MAGI did that, the secret portions of the uploads went to work. MAGI was the most advanced super-computer in the world, with the most advanced security protocols in place. Because of that, Sleepy Eye was arguably the simplest, most basic Trojan ever designed. It was ingenious in it's simplicity: the Trojan itself was broken and scattered across multiple uploads, part of the integral code necessary to each. Thus, MAGI, for all it's pattern recognition and advanced screening, never detected the anomaly. Once all were in the system and filed away together, the Trojan went to work, layering itself quietly and efficiently throughout the computer and making tentative contacts to a bot-Net that began in Hawaii and ended in a room in Langley, Virginia. MAGI was well-designed, but it was also over-designed. Something as simple, as brazen, as unimaginative as that was simply outside the realm of what MAGI's designers thought would be used to attack it. And that was how access was granted to MAGI for the NSA, working out of the CIA Headquarters.

Officially, at least. One more computer had become a terminal for MAGI, a super-computer itself that was kept in a vacuum sealed, super-cooled room at the top floor of an office building in Chicago. The CIA did not know about that one, nor did anyone else in the US government who wasn't supposed to. The Group intended to keep it that way.

* * *

As he stood in his plug suit inside the equipping bay, Shinji squinted as he stared at the ridiculous shape of Eva Unit-02. Long ago, he had seen an American movie about ghost exterminators. He didn't like it very much, because he couldn't get a lot of the humor. It was too American. He did, however, remember the end where a marshmallow man attack New York City, and he did laugh at that scene. It seemed less funny now, looking at it with the face of an Eva.

"That thing looks ridiculous," he said, crossing his arms.

"I don't see what it's appearance has to do with anything," Rei murmured, standing next to him. She wore a plug suit as well, and both were waiting for Asuka to arrive so they could be briefed. Ritsuko stood in front of the Eva, scribbling on a clipboard.

"It doesn't have to _do_ with anything," he said, "It just looks funny."

"Looks don't equate with functionality," she said. "It's form is designed for it's function. How can that be funny?"

"I don't know how to explain this to you," he sighed.

"Then don't," Rei said. There was no challenge in how she said it. It was a simple observation.

"I feel like I _have_ to," he admitted.

"Then explain it to me," Rei replied.

"But you won't get it. It's…" he searched for words. "Think about how Unit-o2 is _supposed_ to look, and compare it to this. Doesn't that make it look more…weird?" Rei considered it.

"Yes…I suppose it does look odd," she said. Shinji gave up. Looking up at 02, he noted how much the appearance conflicted in his mind. It's dumpling body was slouched and slumped like a petulant child, but there, inside the clear faceplate, was the four-eyed, snarling visage of the Eva. The worst toy you could get a kid…the Tickle-Me Satan. He smiled at the thought.

It _was_ funny, he had to admit. But not as funny as what walked through the door.

"This is _awful_! I can't believe you're making me wear this, it's not fair…_what have you done to my baby_?" Shinji stared in stunned silence as Asuka waddled in from the locker room, her suit…_expanded_ to an almost obscene width. She looked as though she could have rolled in just as easily as she walked in. "Look at that! This is awful! How am I supposed to have any _dignity_ after this?" She caught sight of Shinji and Rei staring at her, both in their sleek plug suits and highlighting her own ridiculousness. "Stop looking at me like that! Why are you even looking? This is the worst thing that could-"

"Looking good, Asuka," Kaji called from a catwalk overhead. Asuka squealed, rushing back to the locker room. Ritsuko grumbled. Shinji looked up at Kaji, and the man winked at the boy. Shinji smiled nervously, allowing himself to express some of his amusement. He looked over at Rei, who simply seemed bored by everything.

"As I was _trying_ to explain," she said, raising her voice, "This is an overpressure suit designed to keep your Eva intact and survivable at high temperature and high pressure. Your plug suit is designed to keep the sympathetic resonance from crushing your organs."

"Shouldn't she have something for her head, as well?" Shinji ventured, watching Asuka's face peek out with misery from the locker room.

"No," Ritsuko said, "As long as her synchronization rates don't get _too_ high, she should be fine. She'll have a higher resonance via the plug suit than bare skin."

"Should?" Shinji asked, but Asuka was back out, suffering the indignity of appearing in her 'fat suit' so she could scream at Ristuko.

"I'm not doing it! You can't make me! Look at how ridiculous I look! Look at my liebchen!" she moaned. "Make someone else do it! Make Shinji do it! That's what he's here for, right? To do the ridiculous stuff?" Shinji started to protest, and felt his words die in his throat as he thought of _himself_ in that get-up. It seemed to him that the best way to avoid that fate was to keep silent, and hope everyone forgot he was here.

Then the purpose of the get-up registered in his mind. Surrounded by heat, pressure…death. Crushing death. Constant, building, unyielding…he felt a sense of claustrophobia take over, then the strange sense of fear when he realized that was _exactly_ where Asuka was going if she could be persuaded to get over her appearance. He thought of 02 crumbling…he thought of Asuka burning. Something urged him to speak up, to volunteer.

"I-" he began, as Rei started to speak at the exact same moment. Both were cut off at simultaneously by a _third_ voice, one that was loud and carried an inflection of impatience.

"I'll do it."

All eyes turned to see Samson Creed and his handler, another Army captain named Ashley Merritt, standing in the bay. They both wore their ACU uniforms, though Samson had rolled the sleeves up on his top. It was almost like he was trying to find the most ways he could toy with uniform regulations. Shinji was wondering when they had gotten here, and how long they had stood there before announcing their presence.

"What…what's _he_ doing here!?" Asuka whined. "Get out of here! Stop looking!" Samson glanced at her, cocked his head, and then turned his gaze back to Ritsuko.

"It's an inefficient machine, but suited to the task. I'll take 02 myself-"

"The _hell_ you will!" Asuka snapped, pointed a finger at him and managing to look somewhat threatening despite her beach-ball appearance. "After everything you've said about her, you're lucky you get to stand in the same _room_ as my precious Unit-02! I'm the only one that pilots her, and that's it!" Samson looked at her, his eyes glazing.

"You don't reload bayonets," he said in English. Merritt's eyes widened a fraction, and she half-turned towards him.

"What? What does _that_ mean?" she snapped.

"What does _what_ mean?" Samson said, a slight edge in his voice now.

"Captain," Merritt cut in smoothly, "Let's sit this one out and let the Japanese handle it. There'll be another Angel, believe me." Samson continued to stare at Asuka, and Asuka stared daggers right back. He bared his teeth, and raised his arm to point at her in a gesture that was both threatening and very un-childlike, and then turned and exited the equipping bay without another word. Merritt shrugged her apologies, and hurried after him.

"I _hate_ that guy," Asuka hissed. "Why do we have to work with him? Did you see what he did? There's something wrong with him. And he threatened me!"

"Well," Shinji began, "You did say you were going to cut him-"

"Quiet, Shinji, nobody asked you anything!" Asuka raged, turning back to her Eva and cooing to it, offering heartfelt sympathies for its ridiculous appearance.

"The appearance doesn't have to do with anything," Rei offered, but Asuka was ignoring her. Presently, Misato's voice came over the loudspeakers.

"What's taking so long down there?" she yelled. Shinji rolled his eyes, wandering what else the day would bring his way.

* * *

"'The Itsy-Bitsy Spider?'" Ennis asked, sipping his coffee. He sat in his chair across from Merritt, in his triple-sealed office, with a baffler on the table between them to keep out unwanted listeners.

"It's just a mnemonic device," Merritt explained. "Something we figured out with Personality Overlays." Ennis grimaced at _that_ nasty little memory. PersOvies were one attempt among many to make the perfect sleeper agents. The results were a nice little horror story told to new agents to keep them afraid of what was under the bed. "I just told him to repeat it in his head, in the background. It's like a signal, a constant reminder that keeps him in the present."

"Won't that…prevent him from doing anything else? He'll be focused on nursery rhymes all day," Ennis grumbled.

"He is capable of running five trains of thought simultaneously," she said, "I've tested him on that. In fact, I think he's capable of _more_, but he's hiding it from us."

"Five…trains of…" Ennis shook his head, and leaned forward. "And you figured this out how?"

"The same way I knew how to use the mnemonic," she said. "I was involved in rehabilitating test cases for Personality Overlay. They could run two to three trains of thought at once before breaking down. It was how we were able to start de-programming them."

"And this…looks like an Overlay?"

"No, it's too advanced," she said. "It's shares some features, but others…" she shrugged. "He said something about a bayonet today, and didn't remember. He did the same thing with two or three other phrases."

"What did he say, exactly?" Ennis asked, concerned. 'Bayonet' could imply he had threatened someone. Merritt pulled out a notebook, and flipped to a dog-eared page.

"'You don't reload bayonets,' 'Grass grows green,' 'It's the girls you fear the most,' and 'It's empty.' Does any of that mean anything to you?"

"Two of those…kind of. The first two…the others, I don't know. Sounds like gibberish. And you said he didn't remember saying them?" Merritt nodded.

"I think the mnemonic will help tie it down, but we need Sefka here and now. I can't keep a tab on this forever. I'm not equipped to," she said. Ennis nodded.

"I'll put in a request for it, through _all_ my contacts. That'll be enough of a stink for them to have to do _something_ about it," Ennis said. "Keep doing what you can. By the way, he didn't…threaten anyone, did he?"

"He made a hostile gesture to the German girl, Asuka Langley Soryu. The Second Child? He also said the 'bayonet' thing near her. She can speak fluent English, so she could have taken that as a threat." Ennis winced.

"I'll talk to Capt. Katsuragi about that before it becomes a problem. After they get back, of course." He leaned back, thinking about the operation which should be beginning right now. He had put in his report about Gendo's interest in acquiring a living Angel, and he felt there was more to that than simply weapons research. There was something moving in the deeper waters here, and it had to do with Gendo Ikari. If he could hit on that a little more, he might find something. In the meantime, he had more research to do on asset acquisition with Misato, and an in-depth apology and conversation about Samson's behavior would be one more hook in the water. If he could spin it, that was.

You don't reload bayonets…he shook his head. You don't reload bayonets, you don't whistle Dixie, and you can't kill crazy. He sipped his coffee, and tried to focus on the things he _co__uld _deal with right now, but he kept slipping back to the thought of Samson.

You don't reload bayonets...

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin**: For the record…had a drill sergeant tell me to never hustle a hustler. Only a drill sergeant can make that sound intimidating. And Misato. Misato can, too.

And for the record…it's _Okinaaawaaa_. With an extra helping of 'waaaa.'


	7. Talk the Talk

**Notes from GobHobblin**: Updated some needed edits to the first chapter. Waiting for my wife to finish getting pampered at the hotel spa, so this will be a short filler chapter, just to keep things rolling.

* * *

There were many tricks to having surreptitious conversations. Kaji preferred the audacious ones, the methods so over the top obvious that no intelligence organization worth it's salt would even _begin _to consider that someone would do something so stupid, so obvious. He also preferred the ones that played to his profile: he wasn't a lady's man, but he was a flirt, an insatiable flirt, and he liked talking to women. Women sometimes liked talking back.

If you found the right place to have a conversation, you didn't even need major security measures. On a park bench was innocent enough, and near the water, a good way to mask voices. They could be seperated from background noise later, of course, but there were other tricks.

Like nearby tidal gauges, for instance. New model devices meant to not only detect potential water fluctations from tidal waves, but also the displacement and ripple-effect created by Angels attacking from the sea. There was more to them then just detecting wave fluctations, however. Operating on a much more advanced model of SONAR, the gauges sent out costant, extremely-low frequency sound waves, creating a constant and changing map image of what was under the water as well. The side benefit of that was anyone sitting close enough to one would be within an effective cone of silence, as far as electronic listening devices were concerned. All they would detect would be a low, almost constant thrum.

This bench also had the benefit of being far enough forward that anyone trying to read lips would have a hell of a time attempting it, even the vaunted Section-2 of Nerv. Sure, they'd get a snippet here and there...but snippets did not a complete picture make. So Kaji felt, to a good degree, safe to speak to his latest in a rotating list of contacts from

"I don't like it," he said through a jovial smile.

"Who would?" the woman asked with a teasing lilt. Keep up the pretense, and flirt like your love life depended on it. She scratched behind her puppy's left ear, the dog batted at her hand with a paw. "What's the potential for a fatality out of this?"

"It's an active volcano. What do you think?" Kaji was testy, and it was clear even through his apparent playfulness.

"Testy, Kaji, testy..." she murmured. She used his actual name, not his code name on file (SEA HORSE was the latest one), partly becaus she didn't know it. If she was interrogated by anyone not in the intelligence services, she could point them to Kaji...but not to SEA HORSE. There were reasons the two needed to be kept seperate. Just like the agencies...this woman was a field operative for the Public Security Intelligence Agecy, the domestic intelligence group. Kaji was with the Cabinet Intelligence and Research Office, the foreign agency. The two had to work closely on an organization like Nerv.

And Seele. Especially Seele...

"I don't like thinking about what could happen..." he confessed.

"Starting to get a little attached to assets, are we?" she chided, purring it.

"A thirteen-year-old girl might die an awful death today, show a little perspective," he said testily. The woman's face flattened.

"I'm sorry," she said. There was a silence for a moment.

"Just...can't seperate the kids from the weapons, can we?" he said, his tone angry.

"Maybe it's not the best time to bring it up..." the woman murmured.

"The intelligence community is curious in what my relationship is with a teenage girl?" He glared at her. "She's thrown herself at me. She hasn't had any reservations in showing me highly inappropriate levels of affection and a desire to have it returned in kind. That is a fact, that is something I am intensely uncomfortable dealing with, but I am dealing with it because she is a child who _doesn't know better_. I'm sure you have my report on my personal assessment for the psychological reasoning behind her...fixation."

"Don't shoot the messenger, Kaji, I'm simply bringing up other peoples' concerns," she sighed. "We have photographs of her hanging off your arm, we have to check. Anything that might be affecting the useful gatherin of intelligence and all...mixed priorities, you know?"

"Hmph." He slouched back in his chair, glancing at the woman's dog. "Is that why you wanted to meet? To ensure that I'm not compromised?"

"Partially. More than that, we wanted your assessment on the Americans."

"Nothing yet, aside from a noticeable chill. I haven't had access to any of them. Capt. Katsuragi described them as 'oily.'"

"Looks like we have something new for you, then," the woman said, her voice flirtatious again. "Do some looking into the CO of the mission, a Richard Ennis."

"I know that name. Saw him on some security imagery," Kaji replied. "What about him?"

"Well, he's an Army Major..." she said.

"Go on," Kaji sighed, drawing a circle in the air.

"Who was decomissioned seven years ago. Disappeared into one American agency or another. We think CIA, but it may be more likely an action committee with DARPA."

"DARPA isn't an intelligence organization," he said.

"And Nerv is a scientific institution," the woman replied. "We think there's a few projects in DARPA that are merely cover for more direct-action quality work. Deniability, and all."

"How'd he pass muster with Section-2? You'd think they'd be all over that," he mumbled. He would know: his first act upon discovering a way into the Nerv branch in Tokyo-3 was to lay his hooks well and deep into Section-2.

"How do you find most information? By sheer accident." She smiled, a radiant grin that made Kaji smile back on impulse. "One of our analysts recognized him in a who's who from officers who held important positions in the Korean-DMZ post-Impact. He was a company commander, then. As a major."

"Major's aren't company commanders, that's a captain's job."

"Unless it's a special company, right?"

"Aah. And that's why..."

"...we have a file on him." She finished, holding her puppy up. It licked her nose. "An officer, a gentlemen, and a sneaky no-good spy."

"Inside Nerv...the Americans are curious." He smiled. It only made sense for the Japanese to wonder: they were a host country, after all. The Americans...he knew there was more to the mission than just the EVA. This confirmed it.

"Keep your eyes open, hon," the woman said, standing up to pass by him. She leaned over and kissed him on the nose. "Take care of yourself, too."

"Don't I always..." he mumbled.


	8. Dio

"Major!" The word was hissed, and Ennis turned in surprise. He was on his way to the Command Bridge, to observe the activity at Asama. The entire Nerv command team had moved out to a research station there, to be on site as they conducted operations. He was, sadly, not surprised to see Merritt stalking towards him, tight lipped.

"What?" he asked wearily.

"Samson wandered off," she said. Ennis felt his hair go a little more gray.

"Wait, you lost him _again_?"

"Not lost _precisely_," Merritt said, stretching the words. "He's been located on a…" she teetered her hands back and forth, "…command and control V/TOL that's headed towards Mount Asama."

The flesh on the left side of Ennis' nose began twitching. "By…himself?" he asked carefully.

"No, there's a flight crew…and an observation staff from Nerv. They were late going out, due to mechanical difficulties," she began explaining, tapping her index fingers together. It was a nervous motion, and one that seemed to fit with her tense expression.

"I thought he was in a safe place saying nursery rhymes," he said.

"He was!" she snapped. "When I left him to tell you about my findings, he was there and looking normal. He had three MPs guarding him. I got back and…" she made a grasping motion.

"Can we have the aircraft turn around?" Ennis asked.

"It's a key part of Nerv's observation and recording element. They've actually held off the op just to get it into position!" she said desperately. Ennis tried to say something else, then thought better of it. Waving his arms over his head, he stalked away, leaving Merritt slumping in his wake.

* * *

"…so be careful," Misato said over the comms net, her image reflected in the 'air' to the left of Asuka. It might as well _be_ air, as the LCL around her had the consistency and mass (or more precisely, the _perceived_ mass) of normal Earth atmosphere. She was transmitting from the specialized rig on the lip of Asama, but the connection was still fuzzy and diluted, thanks greatly to the interference from below. Heat, motion...even magnetic diffusion. A mission in a volcano...who would have thought?

"No need to worry!" Asuka said brightly: being in the midst of the mission, even in her deplorable state, had greatly improved her mood. "I'll have the Angel obtained and packaged in no time." She studied the large, red bar in her Eva's hands, the main cross beam of a laser-projected 'cage' that would…_should_…contain whatever was down there. An easy mission, to be sure…but any successful mission was one more notch on the belt.

"I'm sure you will," Misato said patiently, "Just take it slow and easy. We don't want you or 02 damaged or destroyed."

"Is Kaji watching?" Asuka asked quickly, wanting him to see her in a better light following the less-than-stellar battle with the Seventh Angel.

"He isn't in the GeoFront at this time," Misato said, "He had some errands to run." Asuka made a face, and made the motion of fiddling with some instruments on her console that needed no attention. It was one thing for him to _see_ her in this awful getup, but it was another for him _not_ to see her excel in the field. How else was she going to get him to take her seriously? And she _wanted_ him to take her seriously. Desperately wanted him to. Not like the Shinji kid…that was just kid's stuff, a little fun on the side. It wasn't that he was a bad catch. He _was_ a Pilot, after all…but he was so stupid! One should expect that from just a boy. A boy who was older than her…

She snorted. All that 'one year older' nonsense! As if age was any indication of maturity.

"Is everything all right?" Misato asked, hearing the snort.

"Nothing!" Asuka sang, "Just impatient to get to work, that's all!"

"Well, pull this off and I'll take you to a hot springs," she said happily. "There's one nearby, and we'll have ourselves a nice break."

"Ooh!" she sang, as the restraining rig began to lower, "Hear that, Shinji? A hot spring! Getting any ideas?"

"Should I?" he asked distractedly.

"Never mind, the conversation is _above_ you," she grated.

* * *

Something certainly was 'above,' as far as Shinji was concerned. He studied the massive JSSDF presence in the air around them, seemingly random but somehow evading each other without colliding. It was a lot of aircraft for a retrieval mission…right? He didn't know much about military operations, but…this seemed…excessive…

He keyed his private link to Maya's console. "Hey, Ma…Lt. Ibuki?" he asked.

"What's up, Third?" she asked cheerfully.

"Could you get Misato on the line?" he asked.

"One moment," Maya said, removing her head seat and standing, disappearing from the screen. A moment later, Misato appeared, wearing the headset.

"Shinji, is everything okay?"

"There's a lot of troops out here," he said, "I mean…a _lot_ of aircraft. Is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine, why?" Misato said, confused.

"I just…I mean…" He looked uneasy, and Misato sighed. She looked up from her console, leaned over, and spoke quietly into the headset microphone.

"If…this goes wrong…the UN has a series of N2 mines ready for deployment to the crater to destroy or seal the Angel embryo if it…develops. That's…the Director's orders." Shinji's face went white. His father had set in place a back-up plan that would kill every single person supporting this operation, and possibly the Three Children as well. Definitely Misato, and Dr. Akagi, and…

"You do _not_ know that, nor are you to share that with Asuka!" Misato snapped.

"If I wasn't supposed to know, why tell me?" Shinji said, unable to keep the panic out of his voice. Misato was at a loss for words, but only for a moment.

"Because I felt at least one of you deserved to know what's going on. And you saw it first…you're perceptive in that way," she said, almost sadly. Shinji studied her face, then looked back up. The aircraft filled the sky like gnats in the summer. He inhaled deeply.

"There won't be a problem," he said. He tried to make it sound confident, but he couldn't quite manage it.

"I'm sure there wo-" Misato said, and Shinji cut her off.

"There won't _be_ a problem," he repeated, a little more certain in his voice if not his heart this time. Misato blinked, then nodded.

* * *

"You okay, kid?" the Nerv technician asked, leaning over from his console. The boy in the uniform turned away from the viewport to glance at him, a dismissive look on his face.

"Captain," the boy said.

"What?" the technician sputtered, the word coming over fuzzy through his headset. The boy adjusted his mike.

"Captain. I'm a Captain in the US Army, so don't call me 'kid,'" he said peevishly. He turned away and gazed back down at the crater, as the bulbous white frame of Unit-02 made it's descent. The Nerv man made a face, and turned back to his console, observing as information was gathered and relayed back to Nerv's HQ in the GeoFront for records and processing.

Samson, for his part, watched the proceedings with a detached interest. _The itsy-bitsy spider_ hovered somewhere in the back of his mind, no longer overtly noticed, and while he hated to admit it…the Merritt woman was right. It did give him _focus_, acting like a lighthouse in a hazy and treacherous sea. As long as it lingered back there, he was…here. More or less. Things had been muddled since…the update. It _was_ just an update, right?

He rubbed his chin as he stared at the antics of the Evas below. Unit-oo and Unit-01 were on the lip of the volcano, and Unit-02 had already descended beyond where it could be seen from the air. The other two stood stock still, waiting and…doing what? Where did they fit in to all this? They couldn't retrieve Unit-02 if something went wrong. They lacked D-Type equipment of their own. And what's more, they couldn't exactly contain whatever came out, for more of the same reason. They risked falling into that mass of heat and pressure, and being gone for good.

_The itsy-bitsy spider…_

He focused on the purple one, Unit-01. He had to admit, it did look regal standing there. Something about it's design seemed aesthetically pleasing when compared to the other two Evas…especially to Grendel. Grendel, the whining, frightened, weepy, pleading…

As soon as his train of thought on Grendel began, it disappeared just as quickly. Was he thinking about Grendel? What was he thinking about it? He shook his head. Focus on 01. That was an interesting Eva…

Wasn't that the boy's Eva…?

* * *

It was thick in the magma. Even with CT frequency, sub and active SONAR, and everything else in the Eva's formidable arsenal of detection equipment, Asuka could see no more than fifty meters active in front of her. She had a good view on the sensors of the crater's interior, mapped and ready, but that didn't help for a girl who liked to see with her own two eyes. Going on instruments was like going on faith, and that was too tenuous a line for Asuka to hang on to. And frankly, she felt uncomfortable focusing on the three dimensional map. It showed a narrow gash that gradually widened, further and further...and never stopped. She was, for all intents and purposes, in a bottomless pit.

As the depth increased, she felt straining and creaking around her. "This…this isn't anything to worry about, right?" she asked, trying to pitch it as casually as possible. "Just stress noise?"

"Everything seems to be holding up fine," Misato said. "Try not to-"

A massive clang slapped at Asuka's ears. Maya's voice coolly and professionally cut through the air. "The Progressive Knife is detached and falling. Unit-02 is otherwise unimpaired." As she said that, Asuka could hear snapping elsewhere, as all the other ancillary mission equipment strapped to the outer hull of the D-Type suit cracked and shattered, falling away from her. At each creak and each snap, she winced, and whimpered without meaning to.

* * *

Misato heard each sound of alarm from the girl, and forcibly reminded herself not to think of Asuka as a child. She wasn't a child, she was a Pilot. Never mind that she could be crushed. Don't think about that. This was a mission. Officers sent their troops on missions, and sometimes those missions killed them. That was the reality of the situation. It just so happened these troops were children, but that was what the reality of the world had brought them at this point. No, they're not children, their Pilots…

An especially loud pop of stress pressure made Asuka cry out in surprise. Misato heard the girl audibly swallow, and detected the panic breathing underneath it. "Think of the hot springs," she said cheerfully.

"Why do you think I'm still doing this?" Asuka joked, her voice strained. Before Misato could reply, Makoto announced that the Angel's position was closing.

"You should see it any second now," he said. Asuka clucked happily.

"There it is! Do you see it?" Misato felt a presence next to her, and turned to see Ritsuko.

"It…looks like a baby, doesn't it?" her friend said, squinting. Misato opened her mouth, but Aoba was already adjusting the imagery before she could ask, cleaning out the interference. It did, actually…like a human embryo. So strange…Misato felt the free-floating sense of the unreal as she gazed at it.

"Should be easy to nab, then," she said. As she spoke, Asuka was positioning the laser cage around the small (well, relatively small) creature. There was a snap of static as it activated.

"It's been contained. Bring us up!" Asuka said over the speakers.

* * *

In the crater, Asuka felt the lurch as the cables tightened, and she began rising. "It's not very impressive," she said, eying the little thing in the center of the cage. "I don't know what we can do with it."

"Hopefully a lot," Misato said. "Maybe determine where they're coming from, better weapons against them. Who knows?"

"Well, it would be _nice_ to be on the offensive for once. Standing around and waiting for them is so…so passive." She sniffed. "If we knew where they were, we _might_ actually get to enjoy ourselves every once in a while." Something seemed to shudder through her arms, and she blinked in surprise. "What was that?" There was the shudder again, and looking through the haze of the magma…she realized that the Angel was _moving._

No, not moving…growing.

"It's…it's changing!" Asuka felt a sudden thrill of fear as she thought again of the Progressive Knife, drifting deeper and deeper to the bottom of the lava flow. She still held the laser cage, uncertain of what to do as they rose. She felt the bar of the cage twisting in the Eva's hands, as the increasing mass of the Angel railed and fought against the energy restraints, shedding the human shape for something more primal and evil. She released it on instinct, and as she did, the bar snapped, and the Angel was loose and free. It had gone from being a small, harmless looking embryo to something flat, aquatic, and insect like. And angry. She felt the rage even in the heart of her Eva.

"Asuka!" Misato shouted, her emotion overcoming her professional detachment. "This is now a destroy mission! Forget about capturing it! Kill it and kill it now!" As she spoke, the leviathan reared towards Asuka and collided with her. A mouth of teeth and tentacles opened and plunged down over 02's head and Asuka's vision went dark. For what it was worth, this seemed more irritating than threatening, as it busily began sucking at the faceplate without doing much damage. It was, in a word, embarrassing. That didn't change the fact that Asuka was fighting with it at the bottom of an active volcano, which in all fairness, should be the coolest thing she had ever done.

If not for the very real danger of dying. Dying in a fat suit, nonetheless. Would Kaji even notice, or care?

She needed a knife.

"Baka!" she snapped, and got no response. "Oh, come on…Shinji! SHINJI!"

"What do you need?" he said, surprisingly crisp. There might be hope after all.

"I need your Knife," she said, "Drop your Knife!"

"It's coming," he said. Asuka called up a 3-D imagery of the internal layout of the crater, and could see the small but very dense mass drifting towards her, racing along parallel to the massive safety cables. She counted down the seconds until it arrived, and heard the sound of cracking glass. Alarmed, she realized that the sucking wasn't so harmless…it was creating a vacuum that was pulling the plate forward and free of the helmet.

The knife was now close enough to grab, and 02's right arm whipped out and snatched the massive blade. She cut down hard against the Angel, and felt resistance. She hit once more, twice more…over and over. She managed to get her head free of the Angel, and with clearer view, tried to target her attacks. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing!

Then there was a great ringing that seemed to reverberate through the Plug, and Asuka was stunned to see that pieces of the Progressive Knife were falling away.

"It…it shattered!" she screamed in shock.

"We see it," Misato said, "It looks like the carapace of that thing is too dense, and combined with the heat…the blade couldn't take it." It _should_ have been able to take it! What could have caused it to fail so spectacularly? Somehow, this was Shinji's fault. She wasn't sure how, but by _God _she would skin him for this. Misato was still talking, something about evacuating and now.

No…no, no, no, _no_! She was going to _beat_ this thing! She was Asuka Langley Soryua, and she was a Pilot, by God and all His Heavenly Hosts! She would send this thing down to hell even if she had to chase it there herself.

Using the broken blade of the Knife, Asuka cut one of her cooling cables, and maneuvered it into the Angel's gaping mouth even as it hissed and flash-froze the molten rock around it. The Angel shuddered as high-grade coolant filled its interior, and then wailed as it tried to remove the hose. There…between the frozen interior, and the superheated exterior…

Asuka again attacked with the broken knife, and _this_ time cracked the degraded carapace. A jet of coolant burst through, freezing the heated rock that poured in, and the Angel split in half. Both pieces continued to writhe even as the magma corroded and destroyed them, and Asuka watched in wonder as the representations for the pieces slowly vanished, like ice under hot water.

"The Angel has been dispatched!" she said happily, and then realized that Misato had been _screaming_ at her for the entirety of that fight.

"Your cables!" Misato roared. "What is the status of your cables?" Asuka called up a damage-report, and felt the blood drain from her face. Of the six redundant cables, five had been cut and the sixth was starting to pull apart.

"What…wh…how did _that_ happen!?" Asuka wailed. She dropped the remains of the Progressive Knife, and tried to maneuver her arms up to grab the cables.

"Don't move!" Dr. Akagi's voice roared in her ear. Asuka froze. "I know what you're trying to do, but don't!" the woman snapped, "You don't have the range of motion in that suit, and any movement might erode the cable. We're pulling you out…_slowly_…just be patient."

"Be patient," Asuka gasped. "Be patient. I'm patient, I can be _very_ patient…" Her mouth felt dry, and her heart thundered in her ears. She was being very patient…thinking about sinking to the center of the Earth, the horrific pressures that waited for her there...

Of the Angel, melting away like ice in the sun, as though it had never existed…

There would be no remains. It would be as though Asuka had never been alive. As she rose higher, so slow, so _agonizingly_ slow, she heard the strain and shudder of the cable.

"Please hurry," she breathed quietly. "It's…it's not holding up."

"We're going as fast as we dare, Asuka, be patient," Ritsuko said tonelessly.

"The cable's snapping," Asuka whispered, pleading, "I don't…please hurry." There was a sound like tearing cloth that thundered through the Plug, and she fought the urge to vomit. And, like that…a snap.

She felt the sickening sense of dropping, of weightlessness…then she stopped, shuddering as her downward motion was halted suddenly. She couldn't look up, but her console chimed at her. IFF showed that Unit-o1 was above her, between her and the cables.

"Sh…_Shinji_!" she gasped. Something in her…something girlish and innocent underneath all the arrogance and ego…was impressed. Touched. Flattered, even. "Idiot," she said, through a grin, "You showoff." He didn't reply. She drifted onto her back, allowing her to see the face of 01 gazing down like an avenging angel. The Eva should be crushed to a pulp, without the opportunity to adapt to the changing pressure. More to the point, it should be broiled. Neither seemed to be the case, as it gripped tightly to 02's arm, hanging from the shredded cabling. She felt the wonderful sensation of _rising_ as they were lifted, back up towards clean air, fresh sky…away from the heat…

"Don't think you're gonna get any gratitude out of this," Asuka said, putting a note of haughtiness into the words that was meant to be playful. "I had it all under control." To her consternation, Shinji said nothing in response.

* * *

Above the battlefield, Samson traced patterns on the viewport of the V/TOL, watching as the Evas were pulled from the crater like Lazarus from the tomb. He hummed to himself, pondering what the boy had done. Accomplished. It fascinated him.

_The itsy-bitsy spider..._


	9. Hot Water

Misato lorded over the table, slamming an empty beer can against its surface. "Eight Angels up, and eight down!" she cheered. "Damn good work, Asuka!" The girl beamed, pleased that _someone_ had noticed her performance. Even if it _had_ been a little questionable towards the end. "And damn good save, Shinji!" Misato hollered. The boy smiled nervously, and Asuka sniffed diffidently, but couldn't hide her pleasure entirely. Shinji detected it, and fixed her with a curious stare.

"Yeah...not so bad. A little showy and all, but...you know..." She waggled her hand back and forth.

"I believe you are looking for the words 'thank you,'" Rei said quietly. Asuka glanced at her, and felt her cheeks warm. Why did Misato have to drag her along? She hadn't done anything but sit there for the entire afternoon like a bump on a log. Even Shinji was more involved than her!

Asuka would be surprised to know how much her and Rei's thoughts matched on the subject. Rei wasn't entirely sure what she was supposed to do, why she was here, and if she should even care. She did find it nice to be sitting next to Shinji...if nice was the word. She wasn't entirely sure what the proper term was, or even the sensation she felt as he sat next to her. She looked at Asuka, who was glowering at her after the comment was made, then looked at Shinji. He smiled warmly at her. She didn't smile back...but felt something of that warmth reflected inside.

"Gratitude...is customary in situations like that, correct?" Rei ventured. "One should be thankful one is-"

"Fine, fine, stop talking, please," Asuka murmured. "Shinji, _thank you_ for catching me." Her tone was sarcastic, and confrontational, but she was surprised at how natural it felt to say them. It seemed to highlight the act itself...

Shinji had thrown himself into the fire to make sure she didn't die. Die that...horrible death that was now skipping through the darker recesses of her mind.

"Gratitude is appropriate, I think." Asuka half-rose with a suddeness that almost tipped the table. Misato squeaked, grabbing at the three other beers that were perched in front of her, and Shinji grabbed his soda. Rei's splashed into her lap, but she hardly seemed to register it. Samson stood in the doorway, in those stupid ACUs, but his boots off. His socks were dark green...was that the uniform sock for the army? That awful olive green? Asuka shook the silly thought from her mind and snapped at him.

"What are _you_ doing here?"

"I was in one of the observation craft. I heard you lot were taking a bit of relaxation in the area, and thought I'd join. Get to know the other Pilots. We haven't had a good start, have we?" He seemed relaxed and friendly.

"No, we haven't," Misato said, cheerfully. It sounded forced to Shinji, but entirely too natural to Asuka, who felt that she had suddenly been betrayed by Misato. "I'm glad you were in the area. Your...team knows where you are, right?"

"Probably," he said in a noncommittal way. "I'm not too concerned. I've heard of Japanese bath-houses, and I thought to myself, I thought, 'Samson...you have to take this opportunity.'"

Asuka stared at him. "What are you, sixty?" His way of talking seemed...so _strange_. Samson smiled at her, and Asuka felt a strange conflict of emotions. She felt a sudden blush at the smile, because, frankly, he _was_ handsome, and she was only human. A cute boy smiled at her, and she felt her heart race. In her stomach, however, she felt a heave that had very little to do with attraction or nervousness.

It was something like loathing, but also like disgust. She was mad at herself for feeling that blush, and disgusted that he had brought it out. It had been a physical reaction, but there was no _emotion_ behind it, and that irritated her.

"I'm going to soak," she snapped, standing up and knocking the table again. She hurried out of the room.

"We...better join her," Misato said, standing up with one of the beers and following. She paused, and looked back. Rei was sitting quietly, studying Samson. "We, Rei." The girl turned and looked at Misato, uncomprehending. "Us girls. Asuka, myself, and you...in the bath..." Misato pointed. Rei seemed to understand then, stood, and followed in her dripping clothes, drops of soda sprinkling across the rice mat.

After they had all left, Samson turned and looked at Shinji. "Interesting friends you have," he said. Shinji opened his mouth to say something, but the words turned into a sigh and he left without a word.

* * *

There was a lot of giggling coming from the girls' side of the springs, and lots of flirtatious dialogue. A lot of suggestive dialogue, too. Shinji knew they were teasing him, and he sank under the water, trying to relax. No dice...they were ruining his attempts at calm by filling his overactive male imagination with all sorts of absurd fantasies. What's worse, he _knew_ they were fantasies, and knew the girls were trying to provoke him. He had the amusing image of Rei just sitting there staring at it all with bland curiosity...then the thought of Rei in the water filled his mind, and he was now grappling with _two_ fantasies that seemed to be mingling somewhere in the middle.

At least he was alone...

"Don't mind me," Samson said, easing into the water at the far end of the pool. Shinji sat up in shock, squirming and splashing further away. He hadn't heard the boy come out, and seeing him, suddenly felt very out of place. Samson said nothing, reclining and closing his eyes.

Shinji looked away, uncomfortable. Uncomfortable with his own scrawny physique versus Samson's. Uncomfortable with the continued and playful banter of the girls behind the wall, which highlighted the sudden change in his own situation on this side. Uncomfortable with the way the boy seemed to stare at him even when his eyes were closed.

Uncomfortable. Uncomfortable.

"That was ballsy, what you did. That was some impressive work," Samson said. "You have some real sand, pal, and I like that." Shinji didn't know what 'real sand' was, and wondered at the expression. He seemed to have impressed the American, for whatever it was worth.

Shinji decided to make at least an attempt to engage with the fellow. "So…you're…Samson, right?" he asked quietly. Samson's eyes opened, and then laughed. Shinji made a face. "What?"

"I think that's the first thing you've said to me since I got here, and you couldn't say it without stuttering," the boy said. "Call me Samps."

"Samps?"

"Yeah, just Samps."

"…Okay."

"So…I guess you're the decisive one. That girl," he pointed at the wall, but his voice was pitched so only Shinji could hear it. "She talks a big game, but she doesn't really seem to have it when she needs it. The Kraut...you know what I mean?"

"She killed the Angel," Shinji said, suddenly feeling defensive.

"And nearly died herself," he added. "You went after her without any defensive equipment at all, and came out looking like a man with a million bucks. There's some quality to you, I think."

"Th…thanks, I guess," Shinji murmured. "Why are you so interested?"

Samps leaned forward, pointing to his face. "I want to know where the bread is buttered, friend. I want to know who I can count on when I step out, and believe me, I will step out and but soon. You think that they'll hold Grendel back when they have four operational Evas versus the Angels? I can't trust the Kraut and I don't understand the other girl. If I don't understand it, then I don't trust it. You…I think I understand you. At least, I _hope_ I do." The smile was friendly, and against his better judgment, Shinji smiled back.

"Well…we have to look out for each other, right?" he offered weakly. "We're Pilots, so we…have to help each other."

"Hey, don't throw platitudes at me," Samson teased, "But I get what you say. You back me up when I need it, Shinji…I'll back your plays, whenever and wherever." This seemed a very strange personality compared to the aloof and sometimes…odd behavior of the boy previously, but Shinji…Shinji liked it. The boy was friendly, he was confident…he had interest in Shinji. Shinji didn't know if it was feigned or not, but it was pleasant, and seemed straightforward and honest. There wasn't the ambiguity of of Asuka…in fact…

In fact, it was like talking to Kaji. Something about the boy seemed old, and worldly, and it felt gratifying to Shinji in that way being noticed could do. For what it was worth…he opened up just a bit. A little bit. And that was all it took.

Samson, for his part, also opened up slightly, intentionally or otherwise. In truth, he was impressed by the audacity of Shinji in going after 02. It was an impulsiveness and daring that spoke to a part of Samson that he did not understand very well, and tried not to think on too much. A core part that frightened him when he looked too closely. Something in there took a liking to Shinji, perhaps in the same way a man found a dog he liked when he had thought others were beneath him. Samson didn't know why, didn't care why, and followed the compulsion without much thought or resistance.

Merrit was right when she thought that Samson was hiding his abilities. He could, at once, hold around twelve different thought patterns simultaneously without any noticeable drop in efficiency. And hust as he had devoted one train of thinking entirely to reciting 'The Itsy-Bitsy Spider,' a second one pattern began of its own volition, without any conscious prompting or decision on his own part.

Shinji is my friend. Shinji is my friend. Shinji is my friend...

* * *

"Can't you relax at all, Wonder Girl?" Asuka sighed, staring at Rei. The girl was sitting ramrod straight in the water.

"I am relaxed," she said.

"Try submerging yourself," Misato advised. "Up to the neck." Rei looked at Misato, then back to Asuka, and began to slide into the water in a way that seemed comical to Asuka. She went a little further than the neck, her chin just touching the surface. "Better?" Misato asked, but the girl didn't seem to hear her. Those red eyes had become glazed over, and her mouth had opened slightly.

"Oh, great, we've lost her," Asuka muttered. Still...she couldn't help but be amused by seeing the girl's awkward bliss. How was it that this should have an effect on Rei? Didn't the girl take hot showers like everyone else?

In truth, Rei didn't. She had always taken ice-cold showers, because her apartment lacked hot water. Even in the locker rooms at Nerv, she took cold showers. It never occurred to her to try hot water. It was simply beyond her.

Sitting in the warm water of the hot springs, she had felt slightly surprised at the sensation in her legs, her feet, her hands as they drifted through the water. Submerged, she felt...enveloped. Embraced. Truly warm. She had never known a similar sensation before, and it sank into all the sensitive areas over her body, drifting through her mind like smoke. She had tuned out the girls, trying to process the wonderful affect of the water and it's temperature upon her.

Misato grinned at Rei's mute surprise, and then turned to Asuka. "Okay, what gives? You've been angry at the American kid from day one."

"Angry? I'm not angry. Why should I be angry?" Asuka said breezily.

"Confrontational, then," Misato reasoned.

Asuka tried to play it off, but even she knew that she _had_ been spoiling for a fight. "I just don't see what the big deal is. He comes sweeping in here with his fancy Eva, which frankly isn't that fancy at _all_, acting like he's the big new thing. I don't get what the big deal is."

"Because that doesn't sound like _anybody_ I know," Misato said dryly. Asuka gave her a nasty look.

"I'm _not_ like him," she snapped.

"You have a bigger target painted on him than you do on Shinji," Misato said in wonder. She leaned over and pinched Asuka. "Got a crush?"

"No!" Asuka snapped, and Misato recoiled. There was a whole language of hate under the word, and Misato was surprised to see that Asuka was not just jealous of the boy. She truly detested him.

"Shinji is...he's..." Asuka seemed to grasp for words, but couldn't find the footing. "I mean...he's a Pilot, you know. He was here before me. He's kind of a clod, but...and okay Pilot. Sometimes."

"You trust him," Misato said quietly.

"I...maybe. I guess." She shrugged. "I don't trust the Hurensohn. I don't know him, I don't want to know him, and..." Her voice dropped. She was staring at the surface of the water. "He...he's unhealthy."

It was odd, Misato thought, that Asuka had picked that word. That wasn't far off the mark of what Misato had thought, either. There was something 'unhealthy' about the boy, and she couldn't place it. Take his jovial personality, earlier. It was genuine, no doubt about it. It was friendly, relaxed...honest. And yet...false. False somehow, like he wasn't even _aware_ it was false.

"The Grendel Unit may be unhealthy, as well," Rei murmured from the water, her words slurred. She was truly in the depths of ecstasy, even if she didn't know what it was entirely. She wanted more of it, whatever the sensation, the way a man who has never touched water will drown himself at the first taste.

"Sorry?" Misato asked, and Asuka perked up, suddenly curious.

"The Grendel Unit...it seems off. Has no one else taken the time to notice it, or study it? Maybe I'm the only one..."

"I've noticed _you_ ogling it. What's the big deal about that?" Asuka mumbled.

"It's..." Rei began, then drifted off. Asuka then got the sensation that Rei hadn't been ogling the Grendel, exactly. There was something deeper to what Rei had tried to say. Misato had detected it, as well. The way the girl had spoken of Grendel, it seemed as though she had looked past the surface of it, past the armor plating. Had she seen something no one else had, yet? What was it?

The girls sat silently in the water, lost in their thoughts.


	10. Black Eyes

"You saw what your son did, I presume," Fuyutsuki said, stirring his soup. The Commander sat across from him, at an isolated table in an isolated corner of the commissary. He had a bento box in front of him, and he was idly picking at the food with two chopsticks.

"What about it?" he mumbled, unwilling to meet the Vice Commander's eyes.

"Putting himself at great risk to assist the Second Child," Fuyutsuki ventured. "I was just wondering what you thought of that."

"A foolish risk to Unit-01," Gendo snapped, "It could have been destroyed, and then where would we be?" He shook his head. "I'm not giving him praise for that." Fuyutsuki considered that, then pointed to Gendo's lunch with his spoon.

"Where did you get that box?"

"Capt. Katsuragi gave it to me. Said she didn't have time to enjoy it," Gendo said. "It's quite good."

"That would be Shinji's doing."

"What?"

Fuyutsuki tapped the edge of the box. "He's quite the cook, apparently. That's his cooking you're eating." Gendo chewed more slowly, pondering that. It seemed there was not a lot he knew about his son.

It would stay that way, he decided. It had to. For the success of his mission. For the success of Nerv until then. And, frankly…frankly…he shrugged, taking a sip of water to mask his features.

And, frankly, because the worst thing to happen to Shinji besides being born was to have a father like Gendo. Because if there was one thing Gendo hated more than being separated from Yui, it was himself. And he knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the worst thing to happen to Shinji was to actually have to know him.

Fuyutsuki detected the shift in the conversation, and said out of the blue, "Grendel came on-line today, by the way." He fished out his palm-sized data tablet, and scooted it across the table. "Look at that." Gendo slid the bento box to the side and picked up the tablet. It was a text file, which opened up as soon as he woke up the device.

—

SYSTEM START:

Function (a) Seq. Ini.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA==start

..

..

..

IS IT TIME YET?

GRENDEL NET

ACTIVE

Command?

—-

"'Is it time yet?'" Gendo murmured. "Time for what? What does that mean?"

"No idea," Fuyutsuki admitted. "I quizzed the new tech at the bridge…the American one. A second lieutenant named Cooper. He was surprisingly forthcoming. He says it's always done that, no reason why. He suspects that a programmer somewhere put a back-door file in there as a sort of joke. They haven't been able to scrub it from the system, so they just let it cut through during start-up."

Gendo shook his head. "I don't think this is software related."

"You and me both, I would think," Fuyutsuki said quietly. "I haven't found out anything about the contact experiment for Grendel, but…"

"Stop." Fuyutsuki looked up in surprise. The word was flat but hard. Gendo looked at and through him. "Let Section-2 find out. Drop the subject."

"Of course," Fuyutsuki said patiently. He had forgotten that some things were…touchy around Gendo, being caught up in the conspiracy of it all. "On other matters, we meet with Tokyo-3's city council today." Gendo waved his fingers dismissively, pulling the bento box back to him.

"Where?" It was an unimportant meeting, as far as Gendo was concerned: Tokyo-2 was where the Japanese government sat, which meant Tokyo-3 belonged to Nerv, more or less. The city council was little more than a rubber-stamp organization, as MAGI made all the important decisions necessary for the day-to-day affairs of the fortress city. Still…being the Commander of Nerv meant meetings were necessary, if just for appearances more than anything else.

"Takeda Tower," Fuyutsuki said. "We have Section-2 down there right now, securing the site." Gendo nodded, finishing the box. It was strange to think he had just eaten a meal by his son, and enjoyed it. Strange…

These were strange days, all in all.

* * *

When Rei tried to access the observation deck to Grendel's hanger, she was turned away by two American MPs in full body armor. She stared at them blankly as they directed her away, speaking in English. She turned, and continued back down the corridor. She wandered for a time before entering into an unoccupied office, it's owner gone to lunch. She sat down at the desk, tapping the space bar to wake up the computer. There were more ways than one to observe Gredel.

All computers within Nerv-1, from the massive command consoles in the Command Center to the smallest palm data tablet, ran through MAGI. That included the on-board computers for the Evas. Which meant that, with the right know how, any single one of those computers could be accessed from anywhere a MAGI-linked terminal. Including the Evas.

The computer was locked, but accessing it was not difficult, and she pulled up a command prompt. The easiest way any computer could communicate was through the command prompt. All that was needed was a good knowledge of whatever programming language the opposite computer was using. Rei knew enough about the internal workings of the Nerv networks to have no difficulty in accessing and speaking to the American side of the net. It was all in English, but she understood English quite well. That and German, of course. The three languages of Nerv.

Not counting the programming languages, of course. Using a few clues in the data received via the prompt, she deduced the Americans were using Abacus V.3, a programming language similar to Nerv-Japan's Amaterasu language. They had to be similar enough to communicate, while still being able to handle the needs of their constituent users. Either way, she knew enough backdoor commands to be able to break through with ease, such as 'oubliette,' the maintenance access command, and 'Skeleton,' which usually opened most command lines. She used them, and was presented with a menu, listing everything from 'Operations' to 'Personnel' to 'G-Primary.'

_G-Primary…Is this Grendel?_ she wondered. She decided to knock on the door. She typed:

G-Primary: Access— 'oubliette'

Command line: Skeleton

After a moment, text scrolled across the screen:

..

..

..

IS IT TIME?

..

..

..

Rei quirked her head, curious. That looked almost like a chat log. A chat log through a command prompt…from an Eva? Curious. She typed a query command, waiting to see what happened. For a moment, nothing happened, and then a second ream of characters appeared:

..

..

..

WHO ARE YOU?

..

..

..

Rei clucked to herself, and then cocked her head. Why had she done that? Make that sound? It was the kind of noise a person might make when pleased, or amused, or satisfied. Why did she? She hadn't _felt_ pleasure. Or…had she? Was there something satisfying in discovering a mystery? She pulled up a second command prompt window, and quickly threw together an algorithm that would allow her to use the first command prompt as a chat window. She could then avoid having to enter the query prompt each time, and possibly get a more active response. If, indeed, something was trying to talk to her. It took her five minutes.

She then pulled up the first prompt, and typed a response back. I AM THE FIRST CHILD. WHO ARE YOU?

..

..

..

IS HE WATCHING?

..

..

..

Rei squinted at that, confused. WHO?

..

..

..

IS HE WATCHING?

..

..

..

Rei scrunched her nose. It looked like it was repeating itself now…locked down on a loop. She tried lengthening the question: WHO IS HE?

..

..

..

IF HE KNOWS, HE WILL BE ANGRY.

..

..

..

Who will be angry? Was this truly the Eva she was talking to? Rei stared at the monitor, the words burning into her eyes: HE WILL BE ANGRY. "Hey, Wonder Girl!" Rei jumped, her fingers slapping down on the keyboard. The voice was loud, and had caught her off guard. How had she been so focused as to lose track of the world around her?

Asuka seemed pleased with the other girl's surprise. "Ooh," she crooned, "That's not your computer. Did I catch you doing something sneaky?" She pranced into the room, and Rei turned off the computer's power strip with the toe of her shoe. The screen went black as Asuka rounded the corner. "What is it? Let me see." She perused the black screen and pouted. "Just when you were getting interesting. Whatever…where's Shinji?"

"I haven't seen him," she said quietly. She glanced over Asuka's attire in a relaxed manner. A very red sun-dress, the color of which matched the Interface Headsets still clipped into her hair, and black sandals of a stylish cut. It seemed excessive to Rei, but most clothing did beyond her own limited wardrobe.

"Well, if you have, let him know I'm looking for him," she said. "What about Kaji?"

"I haven't seen him, either," she said blandly, and said no more. Asuka grumbled to herself, and turned to leave. She made it to the hallway, then bounced in place. She turned back to Rei.

"All right, I'd rather have _your_ company than no one's at all. Come on," she said. Rei blinked.

"What?" she asked, unsure exactly what Asuka was asking.

"Let's go find Shinji," Asuka explained, exasperated. "I want to see if I can make him stutter while wearing this!" She twirled in the dress. Rei didn't understand why that should be a priority.

"Why do you want to make Shinji stutter?" she asked.

"Wh…why? Why _not_? It's fun!" Asuka tilted her head, confused. "Don't you like seeing him flustered and everything?" Rei said nothing to that, unsure of exactly how to answer. She wasn't even sure if she liked seeing him, period…but she _thought_ she did. She wasn't exactly sure.

"Am I…supposed to?"

"Don't you know how men and women are supposed to act?" Asuka asked.

"Do you?" Rei replied, curious.

"Of course!" Asuka said triumphantly. "Anything you want to know about how men and women are supposed to be around each other, I can tell you. I have boys falling over themselves to talk to me."

"Including Kaji-san?" Asuka seemed to freeze for a moment.

"Of course," she said. "Why does that surprise you?"

"I didn't say I was surprised," Rei said.

"You sounded surprised," Asuka lied. Wanting to avoid talking about that, she grabbed Rei's wrist and dragged her down the hall. "Come on, let's see where he is!" she said. Rei followed behind, still trying to make sense of the strange German girl.

* * *

Shinji was, at that moment, sitting in one of the debriefing rooms. The monitors displayed the Mt. Asama operation, and he watched, over and over, the moment he dove into the magma to grab Unit-o2. To grab Asuka. He was trying to understand exactly what it was that made him do that. It wasn't bravery, because he _knew_ he wasn't brave. It wasn't exactly that he liked Asuka…well, maybe he did. Or hate her. Or like her. Was there such a thing where you could hate and like a person at the same time?

Why had he done that?

He thought of the conversation he had with Samson. The boy had said there was quality to Shinji? Was that true? He found himself hoping so. Desperately hoping so. He then thought on the rest of that conversation.

We have to help each other.

Perhaps that was why. They were Pilots, one and all. They only had each other in the end, and if any of them fell…Shinji turned off the monitor, and imagined what would have happened if Asuka was dead. He killed her in his mind, erased her, convinced himself it was fact. The feelings it brought were ugly, distressing. It felt as though an arm had been lopped away. He willed her to life, and did the same with Rei. Again, the same feeling. Distress. Horror. Misery.

He leaned back in his chair, steepling his hands in front of his face and thinking. Thinking hard. Was that why he risked his life? To save Asuka because she was a Pilot? No more? Nothing to do with her triumphant smile, her blue eyes, red hair, the expensive shampoo smell…He felt his thoughts wander back to that night he found her in his bed. She had said nothing of it, and he never raised it. Should he? He looked past his fingers, as if the answer was in the air just beyond, and caught sight of his reflection in the monitor. The steepled fingers, his glowering eyes over them…he saw his father staring back.

Squirming to his feet with a shudder, he paced the room nervously. What was wrong with him? Nothing but questions rattled through his mind. He should go home. He was supposed to be on call, but he should go back to the apartment. Maybe play some video games, read a book…

The door slid open, and Asuka swept into the room in a very daring red dress, an article of clothing so feminine that it only highlighted the bullish way she charged into the room with her shoulders squared. Seeing Shinji, her face broke into a grin, and with astonishing quickness, she adopted a feminine pose. "Shinji!" she sang. "What do you think of my new dress?"

He stammered, completely caught off guard. As he tried to form words, Rei quietly entered the room, the door closing behind her. "You're supposed to be flustered," she said. "If you're feeling flustered, then the dress is working." Asuka's expression went wooden, and she exhaled through her nose in exasperation.

"You don't tell _him_ that," she grumbled.

"Uh…I do _feel_ flustered," he offered weakly. Asuka rolled her eyes.

"No, it's no fun now. What do you think Kaji will think?" Her expression beamed again, and Shinji couldn't understand why she cared what Kaji would think.

"I guess he'll think it's…nice…" He shrugged. Asuka glared at him, and his mind raced for anything he might say to undo whatever it was he had done.

"Just 'nice?'" Asuka snapped. "_This_ is just _nice_? Not 'wow' or 'hummina' or anything like that?"

"Well, _I_ was flustered, so maybe he'll be, too," Shinji offered.

"Of course _you_ were flustered, you're just a kid," Asuka sniffed. "I want to know what a _man_ would think about this."

"Why not ask a man, then?" Shinji asked, confused.

"God, you're boring," she muttered when the lights went out. "What's that?" Asuka asked, surprised.

"The power has gone out," Rei observed.

"I can _see_ that!" Asuka snapped.

"I can't see anything," Shinji said, perturbed.

"Stop trying to be clever," Asuka mumbled. He heard her stumbling through the room, towards the area of the door. She cursed and muttered, looking for the door switch.

"If the power's off," Shinji asked, "Won't the doors not work?" He heard Asuka stop moving.

"Schiesen," she muttered.

* * *

Misato stepped onto the elevator, rubbing her forehead. Coming back to Nerv-HQ only reminded of how much she missed the hot springs, and her skin still felt deliciously tender after the soak. Now that she was back, it was work, work, work. She sighed, wondering what she would have to do to sneak out there again…

She felt her stomach drop into her feet. Kaji was walking towards the elevator. She pushed the DOOR CLOSE button. Nothing happened, so she pressed it harder. He scooted into the elevator, and it closed immediately after he entered. Even the facility was conspiring against her, now. She made a face, crossed her arms, tapped her toe, and refused to look at him. "Hello, Misato-chan," he said through the corner of his mouth. Her expression never changed, but her cheeks went rosy. "Silent treatment? After giving you that great idea for handling the Seventh Angel?"

"Don't call me Misato-chan," she said levelly.

"It's cute when you blush," he offered.

"Stop watching me blush," she snapped.

"Stop blushing." She bit off her response to that, and sucked on her lower lip in agitation.

"Just because we had a good work synthesis on the Seventh Angel doesn't mean you and me are square," she said.

"I think there's still something here, and I think we need to discuss it," Kaji said.

"There's nothing, okay? We had something, we don't anymore, it's over."

"Over?" he seemed surprised.

"Over. Done. Never to happen again," she sniped.

He moved so casually, and so smoothly, she didn't respond until his thigh had pressed against her buttocks, knocking her hips forward and her shoulders back. As she fell, her hands went up to catch her balance. He caught one, and smoothly pulled her towards him. She turned her head in that direction on instinct, and Kaji's lips planted against hers. She trembled, but not in rage. It was desire. It felt as though electricity had burst through her body, and warmth seemed to seep from her lips to her chest, her fingers, her toes. Her breathing quickened and deepened. She felt Kaji's hand grab her other wrist, and she pressed against him, a small moan rising in her throat. The kiss seemed timeless, and part of her wanted it to last forever. Another part of her was screaming for more, for advancement, for the next inevitable steps past that kiss.

The rest of her screamed _stop_.

She turned her head away, still leaning heavily into him and off-balance. He pressed his nose against her ear, and the breath started the whole reaction again. She squirmed away, backing against the elevator. Kaji followed her, planting a hand on the wall next to her and leaning over her. She stared at him, and he gazed back serenely with that insufferable, self-confident smirk.

"Don't," she said, her voice strong but warbling.

"For something that's over, that seemed to be a bit heated, don't you think?" he teased.

"I don't want you to do that again," she said. "Don't touch me like that. It's over. It's not going to happen again."

Kaji shrugged. "I think time will-" The lights went out, and the elevator lurched to a halt.

"What did you do?!" she demanded.

"What do you mean, 'what did I do?'" he asked, still calm but slightly hurt. "Do you think I sabotaged the elevators just so we could be stuck in the dark?"

"I'd expect nothing less," Misato hissed, pushing him away and rushing to the intercom. "Hey, is anybody listening?" she asked, hitting the SEND button. She felt her stomach sink: the tell-tale static of a live channel couldn't be heard. The line, like the elevator, was dead. "Oh, no," she mumbled. She was stuck…in an elevator…with Kaji…and no one knew.


	11. Who You Are in the Dark

God, it was getting toasty in here.

Misato fanned herself in a futile attempt to stifle the heat, but it was no good. The elevator was just getting warmer and warmer, and what's worse, two people breathing and sweating in the enclosed space were making it more and more muggy. It was unbearable, but there was nothing to be done about it. Though to be fair, it wasn't the heat that bothered her the most.

Across from her, in the dark, she could hear Kaji's breathing. She snuffled in irritation, and began bouncing in place. "That's only going to make it more hot in here," he complained. "Stop that, please."

"I need to get out of here," she complained. "Who knows what's going on out there? I'm in charge of Operations, damn it! And here I am stuck in a box with…with you!"

"What's so bad about that? There are worse people you could be stuck with."

"I can't think of any."

"Commander Ikari." She refused to concede that point…even though he had a point. That would be difficult to deal with…though the more she thought about it, the more she felt that Gendo Ikari would be a better cell-mate than Kaji. At least he would be silent.

It was then that she heard a belt buckle being undone. "What…what are you doing!?" she snapped, backing up against the wall.

"It's hot, so I'm taking off my clothes," he said in a matter of fact tone, with just a touch of irritation.

"Stop that! What's gotten into you? This is intolerable," she cried out, trying to will herself through the steel bulkhead behind her. Kaji grumbled to himself.

"What does it matter? First off, you've already seen _everything_, and second off, you can't see _anything_…I can't see my hand in front of my face." She heard the rustle of fabric. "You stay on your end, and you won't have to deal with me." He sighed. "That feels _so_ much better."

"You could be doing _anything_ over there right now, you creep," she hissed.

"You should shuck your clothes, too," he said with just a hint of teasing. "It really does make it a lot more bearable."

"You wish," she snapped. "All men are perverts, and you're at the top of the heap. I'm not giving you any more ammo for your twisted fantasies," she grouched, wiping sweat out of her eyes. For a long time, no one said anything.

"Hey, Misato…" he said.

"What?"

"What am I doing _now_?"

"Shut up!" she snapped, removing her jacket. God, it was getting toasty in here…

* * *

"Try harder!" Asuka screamed, trying to force the door up. Shinji was grunting, and she heard a sliding sound as his feet lost their purchase. He had been working at the manual crank for twenty minutes now, except that it was either locked, or sealed, or just very well tightened.

"It's…not moving!" he whined.

"Get away!" Asuka snapped, kicking at where she _thought_ he was and connected with something. He yelped, and backed off. She groped for the crank, found it, and tried it. She had a slew of insults ready to comment on Shinji's weakness, but they all died when she found that the stupid thing just…wouldn't…_move_…She gave up, glancing around. "Air vent. We'll use an air vent, like in the movies…"

"In the center of the ceiling," Shinji sighed. This room had ten feet of space between the floor and ceiling, so unless they all became trapeze artists, they were not exiting that way.

"Mein Gott, bin ich von _Idioten_ umgeben," she growled. He heard her huff, and slide down the wall next to the door. "This is stupid, stupid, _stupid_!"

"Well, there's nothing we can do about it now," Shinji reasoned. "Maybe we should just wait for someone to find us."

"That's unacceptable!" she snapped. "We're Pilots! We should be out there, not trapped in a box like this!"

"It's not a box, it's a room," Shinji protested.

"It's a box! It's a box, and we're trapped in it!" Asuka snapped. It was bizarre hearing her talk that way. Was she frightened?

"You keep screaming about it, but there's nothing we can do to change it," Shinji complained. "We just have to wait."

"That doesn't change the fact that we need to get out of here. Right now, we have to get out of here."

"Are you saying that because you're afraid of the dark?" Shinji asked in irritation, and immediately regretted it. Asuka said nothing, and he couldn't tell if she was angry, or if she didn't want to say anything with Rei in the room, or if she was ignoring him.

"Go to hell," she finally whispered. Shinji winced when she said that, and looked down at his hands.

"Man fears the darkness, and so he scrapes away at the edges of it with fire," Rei murmured.

"What?" Asuka snapped, but Rei said no more. "What was that supposed to mean? Is that a crack about what Shinji said?"

"I don't think-"

"Shut up!" she snapped. There was a quiver in her voice, and it sounded like panic. She said no more, and Shinji wanted to talk to her…to say something, anything. But what could he say? There was one thing pressing on his mind: Shinji wanted to ask her about that night, why she had come to his bed. What that had meant, what had driven that. Was it fear? Loneliness? Was she just being hard to read, as usual? He wanted to ask her…but didn't.

Asuka, for her part, quivered against the steel door. She could control it, from time to time…but she was afraid of the dark. She was afraid of the emptiness in front of her, the emptiness that highlighted how utterly alone she was. Drifting free and meaningless, devoid of any purpose except what she gave herself. She was Asuka Langley Soryu, and she was alone.

Rei pondered none of these things. She failed to detect the tension in the room, and offered her single comment on the affairs present. Man was as man was, afraid of what he could not understand, afraid of what may or may not consume him. The whole of the struggle of man was one long battle against elements of the universe beyond his control, and the struggle would seem doomed to failure if not time and again, the organism of man survived if just by the skin of his teeth. Sitting here, in the dark, the thought occurred to her. She felt compelled to voice it.

Her thoughts returned to Grendel, however, if indeed it was Grendel she had contact. The bizarre messages, free from any context or understanding…what had they mean? If she had been anybody else, she would have asked the other children present for their thoughts. But she didn't. Because it never occurred to her to.

So the Three Children sat there, together but alone. Always alone.

* * *

The Americans were all running a start-up test on Grendel when the power cut. The Eva was already 'active' via its umbilical, and the two-minute timer started almost immediately. It lurched in its restraints, and there was a very real fear it would collapse. It's pen had been drained of LCL for the purpose of the test.

"Shut that down," the crew chief, a Master Sergeant named Zeel snapped. It was cut at 1:53. Emergency lights flooded the chamber, powered from portable generators strung throughout the superstructure. "What the hell is going on?" he roared, turning from his console.

"Damned if I know, Master S'arnt," someone called back. "Looks like we dropped off the grid."

"Was it us, or them?" he asked.

"What do you, Master S'arnt," the same voice called.

"I mean, idiot, did we blow our own power or did Nerv shut it off?" Zeel roared.

"Don't know yet, but there's a lot of chatter on the radio. Don't speak Japanese, though…"

"Aw, for crying…who speaks Japanese?"

"I do. They say the same thing…the entire GeoFront is off-line." Zeel suddenly shivered, thinking of what an Angel could do if they hit the GeoFront right now. Without power…

"The elevators," he asked. "The main hanger catapults. Are those working?" There was a tense silence as shadows scurried among the the lower portions of the hanger, working by the light of emergency lamps.

"Emergency charges are still lit, Master S'arnt," a woman called from far below. "We can launch if we have to."

"Thank God," Zeel said, rubbing his forehead. The charges were essentially high-grade rockets, linked to a layered system of trip wires all the way to the surface. As the Eva was lobbed towards the surface, each trip wire would manually blow the pneumatics restraining the blast doors above. It would be a hell of a ride up, and destroy the launch tube for any use after until extensive repairs had been made. Faced between that and dying under the ground, however, hefty repairs were a small concern.

"How goes it, Zeely?" someone called, and the older man made a face.

"Come on, sir, a _little_ respect?" he sighed, crossing his arms and glaring at the young lieutenant coming up. The lanky man winked at him.

"Come on, I don't call just _anybody_ Zeely," he said, rubbing at his shaved scalp. The NCO scoffed, shaking his head. 1Lt. Eddy Cooper was a Signals officer who commissioned via a Master's in Computer Sciences, into the Army Reserve, and tended to be…bohemian, for an Army officer. In his former civilian life, he was a security expert for one of the larger technology firms on the East Coast. He had been specifically headhunted for this little deployment.

His transition into this new deployment had been rocky, or at least _should_ have been. The first time he called Zeel 'Zeely,' the Master Sergeant had taken him aside and politely stripped the paint from his walls, as he had many a young lieutenant before. Except that it didn't work, with Cooper. He listened, smiled, and said, "No prob, Zeely," and left the man sputtering in place. From then on, their relationship had reached a sort of equilibrium, for what it was worth.

"What do you want, sir?" Zeel sighed.

"I see you've got your hands full here, but we have a slight concern."

"Slight?"

"You hit on the issue with the emergency charges, but that won't mean squat unless there's a CIC for Grendel to call on."

Zeel nodded. "Actually, I _had_ been wondering about that. One thing at a time, though…we've go to ensure that we can _launch_ the thing in the first place."

"So we have no support network up?"

"Outside of MAGI? Well…we've got our subsystems up, right here. All of these are on their own generators, for the time being. We could rig them up into something, if we needed to."

"All right…we'll need a temp station, right…um…" Cooper scanned the hangers, and caught sight of the observation deck. "Up there. We can set up batteries while moving portable generators, and reactivate Grendel's wireless net while MAGI is still off-line. It'll be like running a rocket with a calculator, but I think I could manage, if things went sideways."

"Can you run a rocket with a calculator?"

"I could run the whole moon mission with a penny whistle and a telephone," Cooper said through a grin.

"Oh, hubris. I wonder what that tastes like," a lady corporal said as she passed by.

"Bacon, mostly, with a dash of curry," Cooper grinned. "How soon do you think we can get that set up?"

"I'll earmark some people to set it up, now, sir," Zeel said.

"That's why I like you, Zeely."

"Please stop calling me that, sir."

* * *

Gendo slowly paced back and forth on the command deck, ignoring the building heat. Self-powered emergency lights were up, but that was all. MAGI was down, defenses down, everything was down. It was all too convenient for a power surge or power failure. Too timed, too surgical…too pat.

His suspicions were rankled, and he wondered if, perhaps…there was Lorenz's hand print on this mess. It seemed a self-inflicted wound, to hurt him while taking down Nerv. The Angels had the potential to succeed in that scenario, but would Lorenz be spiteful enough to risk the end of the world just to shame and humiliate Gendo?

Possibly. "Sabotage," he finally breathed. Fuyutsuki nodded.

"It has to be," he agreed. "Considering the total loss of power with no backups…"

"The Americans?" Gendo asked, but Fuyutsuki shook his head.

"Not their style, I would think. They're here to observe because they know nothing about us. Why sabotage when they're still learning?"

"To see how we respond, of course, but I take your meaning."

"Terrorists, perhaps? Or…a third party?" Fuyutsuki was careful in what he said, in the presence of others. It was exactly what Gendo had considered, but he shrugged.

"Maybe, maybe not…" but he trailed off as one of the detail approached them with a radio in his hand.

"What is it?" Fuyutsuki asked.

"We have a problem, sir," the Section-2 man said. "Reports from the surface over the radios." Gendo nodded, knowing what the man would say next. "There's an Angel inbound."


	12. Itsy

"Where are the Children?" Gendo asked.

"We can't find them, or Capt. Katsuragi," Maya said. "It's possible that they've been trapped by the black out."

"Possible, or confirmed?" Fuyutsuki asked.

"Sir, we have no way of confirming," Maya said helplessly. "This is about as close to a complete systems failure as we can get."

"They aren't here, and that's the crux of it," Gendo said, "And what's more, we may not be able to launch any of our Evas in a timely manner, nor can we ensure they'll be powered once they move."

"Ours can."

Eyes turned toward Maj. Ennis, who had appeared on the bridge as if by magic. "We're currently completing a backup command station in the observation deck near the hanger. And we have power for Grendel."

"Power?" Fuyutsuki asked, surprised.

"I've been told the emergency batteries are on line, with two minutes of time for combat. Emergency charges in the launch gantry are on-line, too."

"Can we guarantee that two minutes is all that's needed to defeat the Angel?" Fuyutsuki queried.

"No, but what choice do we have? We can't coordinate external forces without power, and what's more, do we want to risk sending them against an Angel? Two minutes with a weakened Eva is better than no response at all."

"The Pilot?" Maya asked, too surprised to remember her rank. Ennis didn't seem to notice.

"Capt. Merritt is on rout to the hanger right now," Ennis said, waggling a radio in his hand.

Gendo closed his eyes. When you were in the debtors pocket, you were in his power. Giving in now would make the Americans necessary, and from there, no telling where they could curl their claws in next. But…what choice did he have? Events had conspired against him.

"Fine," he conceded, "Inform your crew that we…will need their assistance."

* * *

The Plug Suit Samson utilized was over-layered and armored, partially for defense of the Pilot should he eject, but also to protect the more fragile sympathetic wiring inside the suit necessary to slave Grendel to the Pilot's movements. The Japanese models were far more durable, so the American one had to make a payoff, somewhere. This meant that, unlike the Japanese suits, the American suit was not one-size fits all. It had to be tailored to Samson, due to the armor plating. It also meant it took longer to gear up.

"Now, remember, you only have 1 minute 53 seconds of power. All start up systems and tertiary computer systems won't be drawing on the main emergency cells, so you can still begin the initialization sequence without drawing on the main cells," Merritt was saying. She stood across from him in the locker room, lighting his movements with a flashlight. He showed no shame in her presence as he disrobed and donned the Plug Suit. The interior felt slick to the touch, the strange sensation of the internal membrane puckering against his skin. With practiced motions, he zipped up the rear, and attached the clam-shell chest piece. "Do you have any questions?"

"None come to mind," he said mechanically, retrieving the Interface Helmet from the locker. Two long cables trailed from the single-piece, black helm. With it's glossy finish, it had the unnerving look of a single eye when worn.

"Good. Let's get moving, then," Merritt said. The two of them exited the locker room, and were escorted down the tunnel to the loading bay. The Plug to Grendel was waiting, with a crew to manually crank the Plug into place. Samson was assisted into the Plug, two technicians entering with him to begin attaching the various wires and connections needed to pilot Grendel. One assisted Samson into the helmet, then attached the two wires to a pair hanging and waiting. Until the LCL filled the space, the tangle of wires would be constricting and problematic. Samson reclined, hanging free in the wires and watching the technicians exit. The hatch sealed, leaving him in darkness. He heard the slosh of liquid, and LCL began to flow past his legs, filling at a rapid pace. In a very short span of time, the entirety of the Plug was filled. He felt the Plug move as the ground crew began to crank it into the Grendel's Port. It felt like hours until the Plug stopped moving, an a small hum seemed to fill the air. The LCL seemed to take a new form, liquid and gaseous at the same time. He drifted inside the wires, feeling them recede away as current and pressure began to move him into an optimal position. Lights began to flicker in the space, and an orange glow encompassed him. The HUD within his helmet winked on, and he watched as more computers flickered on one by one.

It was then that a numbing sensation crawled over his skull as the Integration Helmet linked to the behemoth around him. Any moment, the link would be made, and the conversation would begin, as always. It was wearying, but inevitable, and sure as sure, a quiet, meek voice called to him from the darkness.

_Is it time?_

_No,_ he began, in irritation, _It's not time. Stop asking, it will never _BE_ time._

_But…I'm so…please let it be…_

_SHUT UP!_

_Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorry _the voice pleaded, recognizing his presence at last.

_Stop apologizing. We have a threat_, he said.

_A…threat? An Angel? Are…are we going to fight?_

_Of course we are. It's what we're built for_, he sneered in his mind.

_But…are we…um…_

_Stop stuttering!_ He lashed out, and the presence receded a bit, cowering before him. He bit his tongue, and thought soothing images. _Calm down, now. You're with me. Have I ever failed you before?_

_No, no…_

_Don't you trust me? I'll take care of you. I always take care of you. Don't I?_

_Y..yes. Yes. Yes. Yes._

_Good. Begin the start-up sequence._

_Sequence…initialized, t_he voice replied reluctantly. It was then that he felt his limbs…grow. His legs stiffen. It was then that he _became_ Grendel…

* * *

Cooper popped his knuckles, watching the start-up reflected on his monitors. Four had been set up, one next to the other, cabling trailing from the portable units. A wireless link up, running from the same generators, would allow for communication with Grendel at all times. "We're about ready, sir," Zeel called over the radio.

"Roger, Zeely, get your people clear of the hanger and we'll send Grendel up." Up to what, he didn't know. They were getting verbal communications on where the Angel was moving, but that was precious little information. He updated it as he could, but he would have to rely on Grendel's sensors to feed information to his console. "This is going to be interesting," he mumbled, his hand dancing over the keyboard. "Fourth Child, are you ready?"

"Initialization beginning at pace," the boy said, almost sleepy. "I'd say ten more seconds, and we're linked."

"Good. Remember, limited time to take down the target," he warned.

"Limited time, no problem," Samson said. _No problem, of _course, Cooper grinned, watching the systems of Grendel light green, green, green on his monitor. "Five seconds…three…ernh…" Samson grunted as the sympathetic resonance was total. Unlike Units-00 through 02, there was no percentage field necessary to fill for a Pilot synchronization, as the entire process was more or less 'forced.' Watching the Eva shudder, Cooper wondered if it wasn't painful for it. It was certainly uncomfortable on the Pilot. "Complete," Samson sighed, almost dreamily. "Launch when ready."

"Is the hanger clear?" Cooper asked into his portable radio.

"We're clear. Launch when ready," Zeel called. Cooper leaned over and slapped an emergency panel placed next to his console. The room shuddered as the emergency charges blew, and slowly, Grendel began to rise. It's speed gradually increased, until it disappeared through the roof. As it rose, the hatch charges blew, allowing the doors to open under their own weight. Soon, Grendel was zipping through them, as fast as the pneumatics would have pushed it. Grendel rose, and the room in front of Cooper filled with smoke and flame.

* * *

Samson _felt_ the heat from the charges, the rush of movement. He was heading up, faster and faster, and his stomach twisted at the sensation. Did he feel fear? No…no, but he did feel anticipation. Longing. Excitement. Hunger. Light suddenly blinded him, and he felt a free-floating sensation as Grendel rose a hundred and fifty feet into the air on momentum.

"Emergency batteries on line," Cooper snapped, "Power beginning at 1 minute, 53 seconds. Do you see the target?"

The countdown timer appeared in the corner of Samson's vision, and he braced his legs, allowing Grendel to collapse and land in a combat crouch. He turned his head left, and then right. To his surprise and pleasure, the Angel was remarkably close. It looked like a daddy-long legs, with a hulking triangular body in the center of four spindly legs. It seemed unaware of the threat that had arrived, trundling along on a course parallel to Grendel. Samson scrolled through his weapons, and giggled to himself. "Everything all right?" Cooper asked.

"The Itsy-Bitsy spider, went up the water-spout," Samson mumbled, "Down came the pain, and tore the spider out." Hmm…Daisy-Cutters would be a good choice.

"What on earth are you muttering about, Pilot?" Cooper grumbled. Samson ignored him, bringing up the Daisy-Cutters.

"Out came the fun, and we had more of the same…" The targeting reticle locked on. "And the Itsy-Bitsy spider learned about the pain." Samson willed it, and one-hundred Daisy-Cutter grenades launched from the forward shoulder pads, great, sweeping arcs of white smoke trailing towards the beast. At one hundred meters, point-blank range, they cut and dimpled the green hide of the Angel with sub-munitions, each one carrying twenty smaller rocket-propelled armor-piercing explosives. Two thousand explosions pock-marked the surface, and a crack formed down the hide. The beast bellowed, and red LCL began to seep through the cracks. It stumbled from the assault.

"There's no AT Field detected. Repeat, no AT Field detected," Cooper called, and Grendel sprinted forward. Samson could _see_ that, and his blood-lust was rising. He was practically drooling.

_Cutitcutitcutitcutit…_Samson grinned feral, saliva flecking the interior of the helmet. _You don't reload bayonets_. As he thought that phrase, the Integrated Multitool flicked up into Grendel's left hand. Essentially a much longer Progressive Knife, it was intended for multiple uses, like a true combat knife for a foot soldier. It was called Tickler by the ground crews. It was, for all intents and purposes, a bayonet…longer than a knife, shorter than a machete.

_What's the purpose of the bayonet?_ Something, somewhere asked the question, and Samson screamed with glee as he launched into the air and stabbed down on the dying creature.

"To kill, kill, kill, kill, kill…" he chanted, cutting into the Angel, seeking it's core. The thing squealed and bucked under him. If he was himself, he would have wondered why it didn't fight back. Why this battle had been so easy…but he wasn't himself. He was cutting, and there was no end.

* * *

"The Ninth Angel has been defeated," the radio said. As if one cue, the power came back up, and the screens showed MAGI's sigil as it began rebooting. Convenient. Gendo hardly believed in convenient, not did he believe in coincidence. It seemed that the power failure had been timed to coincide with the Angel's arrival. A plot by the Americans? No. They had no way of knowing when and how the Angels would appear. Others might, however. Gendo scowled, pondering the implications, but it was difficult to pin them down. All he knew was that the Americans had killed an Angel, in the midst of a shockingly weak moment for Nerv.

He listened to the background of radio chatter as Nerv personnel began the clean-up procedures and backtracking, to determine the cause of the blackout. He would be eager to see what they're findings would be, but in the meantime, he would have to deal with Maj. Ennis. And, by default, the new role of the Americans in Nerv's policies.

* * *

In one of the briefing rooms, the lights kicked on. Three children hardly noticed, asleep and lost in dark dreams. Somehow, the three had coalesced together, and were asleep in a pile. Their movement had been unconscious, and part of that strange instinct that drove humans to seek warmth when there was none, companionship where it was lacking. When they awoke, they would stare at each other in surprise, or shame, or confusion. If they felt that at all. In the meantime, they slept. There was no warmth to be found from it, for they were alone. They were always alone.

* * *

An elevator opened, summoned by a technician hoping to move to another level to check on the power lines there. It opened, and he was about to enter when Misato walked out, her expression flat and her hair frazzled and dripping. She was in her undergarments, and her clothes were clumped in a pile under one arm. Without giving the tech so much as a glance, she stormed away, with what little dignity she could muster. The man glanced in, and saw Kaji standing there in his boxers, his clothes under an arm as well. His hair was just as much a mess, and he looked exhausted.

"Which floor?" he asked the tech.

* * *

"Good performance," Gendo mumbled, "If a bit…enthusiastic."

"Isn't that a good thing? To be eager to close with and destroy the enemy?" Ennis asked, but he silently fumed. Samson was back to his…normal self, calm, cool, and confident, but the Pilot logs demonstrated slips. Major slips. Kill, kill, kill, indeed…

"I am glad…to see the American Eva is now up and working," Gendo finally conceded. "And we do have to…thank you for saving us. With the power failure, our staff was divided, trapped, unable to quickly get to where they needed. You and you're team…their close proximity to each other…was a benefit." The man was drawing out his words, but he was making an effort, for what it was worth.

Ennis shrugged. "It is what it is, and as you no doubt know, this Angel demonstrated significant weaknesses compared to others. I don't know why it didn't project an AT Field, but it was hardly a challenge for Grendel. Hardly a challenge for anyone, in fact…I imagine the JSSDF could have taken it down with conventional weaponry."

"Possibly," Gendo mused. He had wondered about that, himself. The Ninth Angel had hardly been a threat, if not for the power failure. That in itself was odd...unless...

Could the power failure have been intended to _compound_ the Angel? The Dead Sea Scrolls...he knew of what was within, but it was possible he had not seen _all_ of them. Could there be something within indicating more about the Angels than their simple arrivals.

He blinked, filing the thought away. "Regardless," he said, "I admit that the Grendel Unit performed exceptionally well. Defeated the enemy with 42 seconds left. That's quite the testament to it's capability...as well as the skills of the Pilot."

"Speaking of Pilots, how are the Children?" Ennis asked. Was that true concern, or forced? It was hard to tell.

"Found in a briefing room, asleep. They were sealed in when the power went off. An unfortunate set-back," Gendo murmured.

"Unfortunate, but at least no one was hurt," Ennis said.

"Yes...quite fortunate, that," Gendo murmured. For what it was worth...

* * *

The table in the room was surrounded by the heads of the various intelligence agencies involved in the effort to infiltrate Nerv, including the Secretary of Defense, the Head of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and the President of the United States. All sat around the table as relative equals, but it was an inquisition all the same. Gunner Tate was glad his fat wasn't in the fryer this time.

Kafkutz was another story.

"What the hell is this?" the President asked, tapping the folder in front of him. Kafkutz looked bored, and Tate wondered how a man could be so calm at a time like this.

"He was enthusiastic," he reasoned.

"He was _kill crazy_," the President snapped. "Combined with his apparent slips in personality, along with the request for Dr. Sefka's presence in the operation. We've been inundated with multiple memorandums on why he _shouldn't_ be there."

"We do have a medical staff leaving under a cover story, Mr. President," Kafkutz reasoned.

"That's not acceptable," the Chief-Executive snapped. "Let me be frank: this is an operation to gather information, from an organization that may or may not pose a threat to our nation. And while we're on the topic, let me be even _more_ frank: the Japanese are our allies. We are not spying or conducting operations against _them_, but against Nerv and Seele. Would you like to tell me what happens if this boy happens to forget where he is when inside Grendel?"

"That won't happen," Kafkutz insisted, "He has several subconscious locks in place to prevent him from performing an action such as that. And the fact of the matter is, you wanted a Pilot candidate who would work to our advantage. This is it. It would be too difficult and too unrealistic to find a fourteen year old child outside of our black programs to fit the bill without an extensive and very-easy-to-spot operation. This is what we need, right there."

"I can't help feeling, though, that you've assigned a nuclear warhead to a mission where a spy drone is needed," the President insisted. "I don't want this to move sideways, do you understand? There is no collateral from this. Period."

"Understood, Mr. President," Kafkutz said.

* * *

"I don't like it, I still don't like it," the President complained. Secretary of Defense Irene Babbet and Tate sat in the side-room of the Oval Office with him, drinking tea.

"You did sign off on it, though, Mr. President," Tate said.

"I wish to hell I hadn't, but we're in too deep now to just cut and run," he grumbled. "The Deveraux Intiative…that's where we got this Samson boy, right?"

"Yeah. Orphans as soldiers. Before our time," Tate explained. "You can't just close and be rid of something like that. Even after closing all that down, you can't integrate children like that into society."

"It bothers me…that we don't know very much about it," the President sighed.

"What bothers me is that I've put feelers out for it, and nothing has come back," Babbet sighed. "What does it mean when the Secretary of Defense gets blackballed?"

"It means someone somewhere is doing their damnedest to hide something illegal from those who can do something about it," the President snapped. "Keep hitting away, okay?"

"Of course," she replied.

"And as for you," he said, looking at Tate, "I want you to be my direct line to Ennis. I know it's not in your purview, but…"

"I understand, Mr. President," the NSA said. "This whole thing is all sorts of strange. Is the CIA okay with that, though?"

"I spoke with the Director, and he's fine on it. He has other things on his plate, frankly," the President said. "That business in Germany…" Tate nodded. "Frankly, I'm surprised this hasn't become more of an issue."

"We have so many people and agencies involved in this, I'm surprised no one's leaked it by accident," Tate sighed. He sipped his tea, thinking it would be better with some Irish flavoring, but that was the stress talking. He was feeling more stress, each day, looking at Ennis's reports. This entire operation was hinging on the ability of a single child to behave like a child, and it looked like it was taking all of Capt. Merritt's effort to keep him acting like a human, much less a child. Something was going to cave somewhere…the question was when, and who it would rain on when it happened.


	13. Nocturnal

Shinji sat on a stool in a vast, gray field. The sky above him was dark and violent. There was no thunder, nor wind, but the sound of a great, vast breathing. It reverberated through his head, in and around him.

He was nude, and cold. It ached inside, it ached in a way he couldn't remember. His hands explored his chest, trying to find some way to ease the pressure, the pain, the dull ache. He felt eyes upon him, and looked up to see a small boy standing before him. He recognized the boy, for it was himself when he was four.

"Does it hurt?" the child asked.

"Yes," Shinji whimpered.

"You should remove it," the child said.

"How?"

"You know how."

Shinji nodded. He did know. He did. Slowly, carefully, he inserted his fingers into his flesh, up to the knuckles, then the palms. Breathing in surprise, he opened his torso. The flesh and the bones folded outward like wings, and there it was. The source, the source of the pain. It was so bright, a small sun inside his being.

"It hurts to look at," he gasped, feeling his fingers tingle from the energy emanating from it.

"You need to remove it," the child said.

"Uh…I don't…I think I shouldn't," Shinji gasped. Seeing it now, seeing the cause of his pain…he didn't think he needed to take it away. It seemed that it was supposed to be there. It _needed_ to be there.

"Take it out," the child said, "It only makes you weak. You don't want to be weak. If you are weak, you are useless. If you are useless, no one will want you anymore."

"They'll only want to use me," Shinji pleaded, "They won't want me for me…they'll use me and throw me away when they're done."

"Only when you aren't useful," the child said. "As long as you are useful, they will aways want you. They will always need you. And _you_ can throw _them_ away when you're done." The child smiled. "Isn't that what you want? To control your own life?"

Shinji glanced down at the light, and folded his hands over it protectively. "I…I'm not sure." Looking up, Shinji winced, for the child was no longer there. In his place, Samson Creed stood, leering and maniacal.

"Do you think I would hurt you?" the boy said, and the pain took Shinji.

* * *

Shinji woke with a start, feeling wet from head to toe. He had sweat through his t-shirt, and his blankets were soppy, as though he had been swimming. His skin prickled, and he felt uncomfortable. He squirmed, and sat up. As he did, he heard a murmuring next to him, and he realized that there was skin against his own, soft and warm. He looked over, and saw that Asuka had crawled into bed with him again.

It happened with a certain frequency now, to the point that it no longer shocked or surprised him. In a strange way, it comforted him. There was no other way in which they seemed to understand or connect with each other. For some reason, he felt it was exceedingly important to find a connection with her, but he didn't know how to. Maybe she didn't, either. It was a dangerous thing to assume that she even wanted to, but…if she was so desperate to be alone, why was she here?

He slipped out of the blankets, and hurried across his floor to the door. Creeping into the hallway, he glanced back at the sleeping form of Asuka. Why did she come here every night? Why sleep next to him if she wanted to push him away?

Why did he dream about Samson?

He slipped into the bathroom, and closed the door behind him. He turned on the sink, and let the cold water run. The dreams had become more frequent, and more awful. Sometimes, he would wake up, and see Asuka, and go back to sleep. He would sleep a dreamless sleep, and awake in the morning alone. Sometimes, that worked.

Sometimes, it didn't. The dream would linger, and chase him into wakefulness. He scrubbed his face, and mumbled to himself. Samson was a new addition to the nightmares, and he wasn't sure what that meant. He wasn't sure what any of it meant.

Scratching his scalp, he sighed and decided to go back to bed. He opened the bathroom door, and almost ran into Asuka. She gasped, looking as though she had been caught in the midst of committing a crime.

For an awkward moment, they both simply stood and stared at each other. Shinji had no clue what to say, or do, and he had the feeling that Asuka didn't, either. For as long as she had been sleeping in his bed, she had always left in the morning, before he would have woken up. As far as she knew, he didn't know. He didn't know she had been sleeping there. Now, he did.

Of course, she didn't know that he had _already_ known. That didn't alleviate her awkwardness.

"I didn't wake you, did I?" Shinji finally asked. Her expression became aloof, and she crossed her arms.

"Don't be vulgar," she mumbled.

"How is that vulgar?" he asked. Her lips tightened, and it occurred to him that she had said the first retort to come to mind, whether it applied or not.

"Nothing happened in there, all right?" she snapped. "You don't get to go bragging to anyone about that. It didn't mean anything, and it was just tonight…"

"It's been two weeks," Shinji said. Asuka's eyes popped open, and her mouth worked without sound for a moment. Shinji wasn't sure what

"I never told anyone," he said, "Why would I?"

Asuka shook her head, looking furious. Shinji didn't know why, and he had felt he had done something wrong. The feeling irritated him; he didn't like feeling guilty without knowing why.

"You think you're something special, don't you?" she snapped, "I get bored, okay? I was bored."

"Um…I get…lonely, too," Shinji said awkwardly. She looked at him.

"What does that mean?"

"I just thought…you did that because you were lonely," Shinji said. "It's okay, you know."

"I don't get lonely," she snapped, moving as if to push past him. She didn't, and remained in place. It looked as if she had more to say, and was trying to phrase it the right way. "And if I did," she finally managed, "I wouldn't look for company with an immature brat like you. What makes you think that a little boy like you would interest me?"

That sounded like two completely different things, somehow, but both hurt Shinji. He glared at her, and she shifted under the eyes.

"Why are you awake, anyway?" she finally grumped. Shinji looked at her suspiciously.

"I had a nightmare," he said.

"Is that all?" Asuka said. "One nightmare, and you're up and about."

"I've had nightmares ever since I moved here," he said.

"Every…every night?"

"Every night," he said.

"Hmm," she murmured. "They're no big deal. If you can't deal with a nightmare or two, how can you expect to deal with the Angels?"

She was turning it back around on him, and he huffed. "Whatever," he mumbled, and pushed roughly past her. She squeaked, surprised by the sudden, belligerent movement. He turned and looked back at Asuka, who remained standing in the hall. He felt guilty, now, and wanted to fix it somehow. "Um…if it helps you sleep better, you should come back. I can sleep on the floor if that makes you feel more comfortable."

"No, it's fine…I mean…" She had spoken without thinking about it, and blushed. "Just…" It was a strange sensation, seeing Asuka standing in the hall looking so indecisive. He had never known her to be unable to make a simple decision. Even if the outcome was disastrous, Asuka would make up her mind and carry through with it, consequences be damned. This was…odd. It was as though he was seeing her without clothes on, and he felt embarrassed. There were no guards up, and it seemed she had the same sensation.

Shinji looked down, and walked back into his room. He crawled under his blankets, and lay still, begging for sleep to come. It didn't.

He heard Asuka enter the room, and felt her slide onto the other side of the bed. "Don't say a word," she hissed. He didn't, and they slept the whole night through, each facing their own side of the room.

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin**: Short update, very busy, and I've got Adventure Time on my mind. I loves the Adventure Time…


	14. Aftermath

"I think we should send him now."

Keel Lorenz gazed at the Walloon through his eyelashes. The man from Belgium had a hungry look about him, one that made even Lorenz feel a note of agitation. Still, it was Lorenz who was in charge, and that was a trump card that could never be overplayed.

"A new Pilot, with the Americans so fresh on their recent victory? No, it would only confuse things. It might make the situation more difficult to read, not less."

Richambeau made a rude sound, then sucked through his teeth. "Confusion is just what we need, Lorenz. Confusion breeds opportunity, and a chance to clean house in Japan and ensure that we are still on course for a successful conclusion of the Project."

"You're confusing opportunity with chaos," Lorenz grumbled, glancing past the Walloon to Piter as he entered the room. "What tidings do you bring, Piter?"

"A new group of Americans has arrived at the GeoFront," Piter said, "We traced their movements back to their origin, and that was no easy task. They hid their movement very well. Very well, indeed."

"What was the origin point?" Lorenz asked.

"Langley, Virginia," Piter said. "All of them civilians. What do you make of that?"

Lorenz raised his eyebrows in thought. "The first American sortie is a solo victory against an Angel…the Pilot loses himself in killing it…hmm. I would say that they're sending a team to ensure he doesn't 'go off the reservation,' as the Yankees would say." He fixed Richambeau with a scrutinizing eye. "And all the more reason to start playing it safe. This Samson is a dangerous prospect. Anymore information about the twerp?"

"No, none that we can find yet," Piter conceded.

"What about this third player and their goals? Anything?"

"Nothing substantial, but the head of the American group that I mentioned? Dr. Nicholas Colin. Bright promising future as a geneticist at Yale, disappears off the grid. This is the first time he's come back on the radar."

"The rest?"

"No-names. Flunkies. Too young or too low on the totem pole to mean anything. This Colin may be our angle in."

"We have people working on it?"

"Ruthlessly."

"Good," Lorenz nodded, leaning back in satisfaction. "Richambeau," he sighed. "What do the Scrolls have next on the agenda?"

"Sahaquiel," Richambeau said, "A 'great doom from above,' so we interpret that as being an orbital assault. There is a concern, though."

"A concern?"

"The timing is wrong," Richambeau hissed. "Israfel appeared too early, as did Matarael. The texts were accurate down to the minute up to the appearance of Gaghiel. For something so old to be so astronomically accurate, and then deviate…"

"That's a problem," Lorenz agreed. He rubbed his hands together, and nodded. He had reached a decision.

"I'm not sending him, but I am consulting him. I'll meet with Tabris."

* * *

The boy was angelic in his appearance, though oddly familiar. For Lorenz, it was like looking into a mirror, one that pointed back to a time he little remembered now. The child in front of him was like the Rei Ayanami child, in general physical appearance…the bluish-gray hair, the marble skin and red eyes. Despite that, he still looked like a frail, almost girlish boy. It was easy to forget that there was a god living there.

"Kaworu," Lorenz said as the child entered the office.

"Lorenz," the child said quietly, with an odd mixture of reverence, disdain, amusement…it was as though it was trying to find the right note to start the meeting on, and decided to just chuck it all out to chance.

"You've been updated on the progress of NERV-Tokyo, yes?" Lorenz asked.

"Of course," Kaworu replied.

"And you've noted the rate at which the Angels are attacking?"

"Yes."

"It doesn't match up to the projections we've received from the Scrolls," Lorenz said. "Did you notice that?"

"You expect me to spell it out?" Kaworu asked playfully.

"Well, no," Lorenz conceded, "But things have become erratic, and the Committee would like to know that the Angels are on their way to eventual victory."

"Third Impact will happen as it was meant to, of that you can be assured," Kaworu said, but he seemed distant when he said it. Lorenz was uncomfortable with that. Did it indicate that Tabris suspected the lies of SEELE? That the humans might have their own plan for Instrumentality that did not figure in with the desires of the Angels?

"You seem troubled by something," Lorenz asked. "You know you can trust me." Lorenz gave a gentle smile, and Kaworu mumbled. He may be a god…but he was still a child, a human boy with human frailty.

"Sometimes…the water is muddy…" Kaworu admitted, shyly. "It…it doesn't happen often. I can still see the path clearly, leading to Shinji Ikari."

"He is still the key to this?"

"Yes, yes he is. But…something is in the way. It's confusing things…making events…um…erratic." The boy seemed to drift away, no longer in the room. "It's like a swarm, or a cloud. Many people who don't belong are wandering through the path…they are diluting it." He shook his head. "Something has changed, but I can't tell."

"So…the plan is no longer feasible. Is that what you are saying? Are the Scrolls then adjusting to respond to these…extra players?"

"I…I don't know." Kaworu's eyebrows shot up at the admission, and he seemed surprised to be saying it. "I can't say I've ever been in this situation before…to be faced with something I don't know…It's surprisingly distressing and liberating at the same time."

"I'm glad you're enjoying this new experience," Lorenz grumped. Kaworu looked hurt, and Lorenz waved him away. "I'm just irritated. Thank you for what you've said."

"Of course, Lorenz," Kaworu said, sensing he was being dismissed, and disappearing through the door. Lorenz leaned back in his chair, and closed his eyes. Admittedly, a good portion of his arrogance and confidence had come from knowing how the game had been laid out. Now, however…if things were becoming muddled…

He pondered that for a long while in silence.

* * *

Misato crossed her arms and stared at the twitchy little man. The newest American to cross her path was short, with a receding hairline, a fish-like face, and glasses. He was also arrogant and unpleasant to deal with.

"Dr. Colin," she said again in accented English, with a patience that was starting to wear dangerously thin. "We've been over this before. The facilities that have already been seconded to the American delegation should be more than sufficient for your purposes."

"Look…sweetheart…" the man replied, also in English. He didn't know Japanese, and this conversation had taken an even more infuriating turn by being in a language that was not Misato's first. "I'm sure that what you've given over to the Army is a good enough barracks, but I am a specialist, and I require a specialist's facility.

"You can call me 'Captain,'" Misato said coolly. "I can count on one hand the people I let call me sweetheart and you're not one of them."

Dr. Colin gave her a wooden smile and shook in a dismissive motion. "Captain," he said, indulgently. "The government of the United States has made a major investment in NERV-Tokyo, and Samson Creed is a significant portion of that investment. I'm here to safeguard it, seeing as the military was insufficient for the task in and of itself."

If his talk was meant to engender confidence, it wasn't working. He seemed perfectly willing to sabotage any trust she had in the military mission just to make a point, and she tapped a thumb against her elbow. She'd let him run out as much rope as he could, just to see how badly he hanged himself. "Being of a non-military persuasion, it would be better to remove Samson from that environment. Given the strain he demonstrated in dispatching the Angel, I would suspect that being around so many Soldiers is having a debilitating affect. It is essential that we have our own facilities to treat our Pilot."

"The portion of the Center given over to the Americans is spacious enough to accommodate your mission well away from the military," she grumped, "If you recall, we are underground, which means that we are somewhat limited on where we can expand outward. So, I encourage you to try and figure out the situation with your own military yourself. And in the meantime, what is it specifically you do?"

Dr. Colin's eye twitched, and he smiled. "Well," he said quietly, "Well. I can see that we'll be…having one of those working relationships."

"Our working relationship can be as smooth or difficult as you choose," Misato said. "As long as you remember you are a guest here. You would do well to keep that in mind." The doctor kept his frozen smile, stood, and departed. He practically ran over Ennis on the way out, as the Major had let himself in. The American officer stared after the little man, and shook his head.

"Did you clear up the living arrangements?" he asked.

"No, but I'm not giving him any part of the GeoFront outside of what was agreed."

"I'll support you in that," he said. "He wasn't too rude, was he?" Misato's glare was all he needed to know. "I apologize for Dr. Colin's behavior," Ennis sighed. "He's…not made very many friends among us, as well."

"Is he just unpleasant on principal, or did it take an extra amount of practice to get that way?"

"He has a disdain for anyone in the military, I believe. We're like a bunch of addle-brained peasants in his mind," Ennis said with a shrug.

"I'll addle his brains. Why is he here, in my Center?" she asked.

"We were in need of an outside mind in assisting us on handling Samson," Ennis said quietly. "The fight with the last Angel proved more taxing than anticipated. We were ill-equipped to deal with it."

Misato raised an eyebrow in curiosity. "Really? Why not come to us?" Ennis said nothing, but shrugged and retreated into the hallway. He had said his piece, and that was that. He was now off to handle Dr. Colin, leaving Misato musing on this development. Why the new handlers? Why were they civilian and not military? For all their attempts to engender trust, the Americans were doing a piss-poor job. She shook her head.

One thing at a time. For now, she had to deal with this issue of sabotage. If someone was willing to take down their power grid in the midst of an Angel attack once, they would do it again. That was the priority for the moment.

* * *

Colin had gone straight from the meeting with Misato to Samson's quarters, passing through the checkpoints with impatience and irritation at every step. Despite his diminutive stature, everyone gave him a wide berth during his passage. When he finally arrived at the door to Samson's apartment, he glanced at the two sentries outside.

Tapping a toe impatiently, he said, "I have full clearance to this room. Can't you two go guard a crosswalk or something?" Glowering, the two eased away from the door, retreating a distance of ten feet. "Thank you," Colin said snidely, and let himself in unannounced.

The boy was sitting at his desk, folding sheets of paper over and over and discarding them on the floor. He cocked his head, slightly, and turned to examine the intruder. Samson smiled, but said nothing.

Colin placed an object on the table that looked like a tape player. He pushed three buttons, and waited. There was a flicker in the lights, indicating the presence of an electronic cancellation bubble. Anyone outside of the bubble would find their observation devices flat-lining. There was a need for privacy, for this first meeting.

"Samson?"Colin said, "Do you remember me?" The boy smiled in that way that frightened that idiot Kafkutz, but filled Colin with ambition.

"Of course I remember you, Dr. Colin. It's been…very long." Something in the way that Samson said that seemed off kilter.

"It has. Have you had a difficult time here?"

"No. No, no. Just…some things feel a little…distorted. Rattled around, you know…" Samson smiled, but it seemed forced. Colin nodded, and pulled a case from his pocket. Inside were two syringes, filled with a clear liquid.

"Samson, I want to conduct a physical exam, just a brief one. First, though, I wish to give you an injection. Nothing serious, just something to…make things less distorted. Would you allow me to do that?"

"Certainly, Doctor. I've always had the greatest trust of you," Samson said, his smile becoming predatory. Colin gave an equally predatory smile, and gestured for the boy to offer his arm. Samson did, and, after daubing a spot on the bicep with an antiseptic swab from the case, Colin proceeded to inject both syringes into the same point. The reaction was almost instantaneous: the playful expression on Samson's face went slack and vanished, and he straightened in his chair. He was a machine, waiting to be programmed.

"I'm going to ask some questions," Colin said, as he began a cursory visual inspection of Samson. "Answer with a yes or no. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Samson said mechanically.

"Are you a punctual and reliable person?"

"Yes," Samson said mechanically.

"Do you like to relax in a warm and family atmosphere?"

"Yes."

"Do you often contemplate the complexity of life?"

"No."

"Do you know how to put every minute of your time to good use?"

"Yes."

"Good. Good, good," Colin said, completing his physical assessment. The boy sat rigid and calm in the chair, his eyes glazed and unfocused, yet strangely intent. "Samson," Colin said, "The Group is pleased with what you have done so far, but they are concerned. Do you understand?"

"No."

"You've been too eager. You're an eager boy, who's eager to please. We like that, but you need to relax a bit. These people must trust you. It is important to the Group that these people trust you. You scare them."

"I see."

"You're a good boy, but you must be even better. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Doctor," Samson said.

"Good. Now, go to sleep and we will talk in the morning," Colin said, retrieving the dampener from the table and deactivating it. "Good night, Samson."

"Good night, Doctor," the boy said, lying down on the bed and going to sleep immediately.


	15. Lessons

Shinji was on his own. Asuka had been sulking recently, and he couldn't find her. Every time he spoke to Rei, now, she simply looked at him as though from a great distance.

"Why does it want to know the time?" she would ask, then disappear into herself somewhere. It was as though all the time they had had together up to that point had dissolved. Her focus was almost entirely on Grendel now, and it disturbed him. He didn't know how to break past that obsession, and it felt incredibly important to him to do so. But how?

He was wandering the halls of the headquarters, trying to figure that out now. He had come here trying to find Rei, and had found her, and, sure as sure, she had asked "Why does it want to know the time?" And then she was gone, walking away and muttering to herself. He paced the corridors by himself, now, unsure of what to do and unsure of where to go. He felt isolated, empty, and lost.

As he wandered, ignoring the adults that passed by, he detected a slow, steady pounding. It was leathery crack with the jingle-jangle of chains, a sound of raw power and raw violence. It seemed strange to hear that sound in the halls, and Shinji couldn't place his finger on it. It seemed to be coming from the air vents, amplified and ringing. Shinji felt himself drawn to it, drifting along curiously until he had stood outside one of the several gyms NERV maintained for its staff. He had never entered one of them, and found himself feeling a sense of trepidation as he lingered by the door.

The sounds continued, and he shifted uneasily. He swallowed, and keyed the door open.

Inside, past the rows of equipment, there was only one individual at the end of the room. It was Samson, working a dent into one of the hanging heavy bags with his shin. He stood barefoot, in shorts and a t-shirt, slowly but obsessively throwing a perfect round kick every five seconds. The right leg would drift to the floor, barely make contact…and then, as if by magic, the bag was bent in half, the leg was there cutting, the right hand swatting down his lower back. Reset, kick, reset, kick, reset, kick…

"Hey-o, Shinji," he said in a relaxed tone, still cutting with the leg. He hadn't turned around, yet somehow knew the boy was there.

"Hi…hi, Samps," Shinji stuttered.

"How's life in paradise?" the boy asked.

"Ah…still…still living," Shinji offered.

"That's the best ya can do, sometimes," Samson offered, performing a subtle little scissor-switch with his feet and driving the left leg into the bag this time. The motion was almost gentle, but it surprised Shinji and he flinched when it happened. Samson didn't seem to notice, instead stepping in and unleashing a measured flurry of punches onto the punching bag. Shinji realized that the blows, delivered with bare hands, were as powerful as the kicks that had just been completed.

He watched in awe as Samson crumpled the bag in, seeming to grow larger as his muscles tensed with each blow. Aside from an occasional grunt, Samson was outwardly calm, his face slack and unfocused. Despite that…there seemed to be something furious underneath those blows. Angry, driving, and demanding. Insistent.

As suddenly as the flurry started, it was over, and Samson was walking away from the bag. Shinji stared at it, seeing the map of violence drawn across its surface. It was practically bent in half from the kicks, and the upper portion looked like a frumpled pillow. It seemed, even, that the leather was split in some places.

Samson, for his part, didn't seem tired or particularly winded. There was a thin sheen of sweat over his skin, but aside from that, he looked remarkably fresh.

"I need to come down here, you know…to clear out the brain. A little aggression…is therapeutic." He sipped from a water bottle near the wall.

"How long…have you…um…done this? This stuff?"

"A while," Samson said, through a half-smile. "I take it you haven't?"

"No…nothing at all," Shinji said, mystified by the imprints in the bag. "I mean…this is the first time I've done _anything_ like this. I mean…being a Pilot. It's the first time I've ever fought or anything like that."

"You're doing well for yourself," Samson said. "You have a natural instinct for it, I would say."

"For 'it?'" Shinji turned towards the boy, a quizzical look on his face. Samson was on the floor, leaning against the wall and slowly mopping at his face with a hand-towel.

"Yeah, 'it.' You have a killer instinct in combat. You see the crease and you cut towards it. You are a survivor, Shinji. You will survive come hell or high water." Samson was smiling, but something about what he said made Shinji shudder.

"I don't want 'it,' whatever 'it' is," Shinji mumbled. The word had a sour taste in his mouth, and he wasn't sure why.

"Why not? Do you know how long it takes to develop something like that? How few people actually have it from the get-go? You are a unique individual. A diamond in the mud. Don't discount that, Shinji."

"What, because I'm…a survivor?"

"That…and you're a killer. A good one," Samson said, satisfaction in his voice.

Shinji felt his teeth grind in his mouth, and he turned and fled from the gym.

* * *

Asuka stared at the Kanji assignment in front of her, and flicked it away. It didn't really matter…with the repeat lock-downs and fear of sabotage, she hadn't been to school in at least a week. What was the point of homework if she couldn't turn it in?

She snorted, glancing around the cafeteria. There were only a few NERV employees here and there, in between meals enjoying coffee or snacks. None of them were paying attention to her, and something about that irked her. She didn't know what it was, or why it should, but it did. She felt the childish urge to throw her books across the room and make a scene. She almost did.

She was saved from herself by Shinji sulking through the doors, looking more frantic than usual. He didn't notice her, making a beeline for the drink dispenser and grabbing a cup. He fumbled it, dropping two glasses and shattering them on the floor. He glanced over his shoulder, self-conscious at the slip as everyone stared at him.

_What is that idiot on about_? Asuka wondered. He fumbled with the juice dispenser, pouring half of a glass of apple juice and turning towards the cafeteria, trying to find a place out of the way. He saw her, and crossed to her table.

"What is wrong with you?" she hissed as he approached. He slid into a seat.

"I ran into Samson in one of the gyms, and he said-" he began, but her foul mood returned in force at the name, and she cut him off with a sharp slash of her hand.

"So, if you'd rather hang out with your friend _Samson Creed_, well that's all fine, then," she snapped. She stood up to leave, hissing, "Hey, it's only right that the _boys_ work together, so God forbid I should interfere-"

"Am I a killer?" Shinji asked, desperate. He didn't say it loudly, but _what_ he said, and the pleading tone in which he said it, stopped her rant.

"What?" Asuka sighed, exhausted. She stared down and Shinji, and suddenly felt uncomfortable. He was looking at her with an open and pleading look. He hadn't asked her a question, he had begged for an identity.

It was as though she had seen him without clothes on. She realized he was blushing, and she coughed.

"Am I a killer?" he repeated. "I don't want to be. I don't want to be anything, really, but I…I really don't want to be a killer."

"Well, you've already killed two Angels and helped me with one, so I figure that makes you…" she began breezily, but stopped herself. She looked back and Shinji, and saw how much she had just cut him with her words. She was tempted to keep cutting, but felt guilty for doing so. She sighed, hating to baby him, but not feeling the urge to kick him anymore. It was like hitting a puppy with a rock.

"No, you're not a killer. You're too pathetic to be a killer," she said. Shinji looked down at the table, rotating the glass in his hands.

_Was that necessary?_ She didn't know where that voice had come from, but it had stabbed at her, insistent. Was that necessary? She thought for a moment on the fact that Shinji had, indeed, been confidential about what she had done. And she had sought him for comfort in the night. She told herself that it was because he was convenient, and as far as she was concerned, he was. He wasn't Kaji, but he was there.

But…he was _there_.

"You're not a bad guy. I can't stand you, but…okay, let me try again." She rubbed her forehead. "You're not a bad guy. I…do like being around you…I guess. I can tolerate you. You're tolerable. You're…not a killer. You can be driven, and you're…maybe, possibly got the chance to be as good as me someday, but you're not a killer."

"…Thanks." Shinji nodded. He smiled weakly, and she found herself feeling warm at the smile. She wouldn't admit it to anyone…to _anyone_…but he had a very sweet smile. She felt her cheeks heat at the thought, and she flicked her eyes back down to her homework.

"You said you'd help me with this stuff," she said, waving the paper under his nose, before feeling her insides harden. Coming up to the table, wearing sweat pants and a jacket, was Samson.

* * *

Shinji couldn't read Asuka's strange expression, but detected movement behind him, and turned to see Samson approach the table.

"I'm not intruding, am I?" the boy asked.

"No, I was just leaving," Asuka replied in a frosty tone, forced through a carefully constructed smile. "Kanji homework to catch up on and all, see you at home Shinji, talk to ya'll later, okay, thank you, buh-bye." Shinji stammered as Asuka whisked away from the table, leaving him alone with Samson. The other boy watched as she left with a barely concealed smirk, before settling down in a chair. He made a low sound in his throat, something like a murmur or chuckle.

"I think I pushed a button or two back there, Shinji, so I want to apologize," he began. "I meant what I said as a compliment, you see. Our line of work requires certain…traits that would be looked down elsewhere. I apologize if it…came across wrong."

Shinji shrugged. "Uh…that's fine. It's all right, I guess." What _could_ he say? It occurred to him that what Samson said didn't feel entirely complimentary, despite the intent…and it further occurred to him that it might be true. He might well and truly be a killer, and the thought frightened him. To feel that his only purpose was to be used by those around him made him feel dead inside, but if that use…was killing…

"Just be careful around the Kraut, okay?" Samson said, conspiratorially. "She looks like she means well, but…well…" Shinji's thoughts focused with amazing clarity at the statement.

"Stop calling her 'Kraut,'" Shinji said in a firm tone.

"Huh?"

"Don't call her that. She's my friend," Shinji said, surprised at the admission himself. She was his friend…they hadn't acted in a particularly friendly fashion. And yet…well…it irritated him. It made him feel irritable when Samson said that.

"I apologize," the other boy said smoothly. "Out of bounds. I'm just saying that she's a competitor. The team is something that's secondary to people like that. She sees you as the competition, you know. You have to be suspect with someone like that. Wonder at why they do what they do, you know?"

"Why do you do what you do?" Shinji asked. Samson leaned back, stroking his chin thoughtfully.

"Hmm. Because I'm good at it. Does there need to be another reason?"

* * *

When Shinji came home that night, Asuka was curled up in boxers and a t-shirt on one of the futons, watching a cartoon show. She didn't acknowledge him when he came in. He glanced at the stove, and saw a pot of half-boiled ramen.

"I thought you were a better cook than this," Shinji commented.

"How was your guy-time with Sssssamson?" she asked. Shinji stirred at the pot.

"Do you want me to cook the unagi in the fridge?" he asked.

"…Yes."

He opened the fridge and began pulling out items for cooking. "He offered to teach me martial arts."

"When is that going to happen?" There was a weird tone to the question.

"I didn't say yes," Shinji said. "I wanted to think about it. It doesn't…seem like my thing, you know?"

"So he's not teaching you?" The tone was indifferent, but there was a hint of curiosity under it.

"Maybe he will…I haven't really said yes or no," he repeated. He felt heat on the back of his head, and he turned uncomfortably. She was staring at him with a baleful eye. "He's not teaching me," Shinji emphasized, sensing she wanted something more…direct.

"Oh," she said, hopping up on her slender legs. The motion was fluid and dance-like, and she crossed the apartment to him. "Do you want to learn? I mean, you could stand to learn a few things, as pathetically as you fight."

"Pa…pathetically…?" Shinji wilted under the word. Asuka had that talent for cutting to his core like that.

"Yes, pathetically," she emphasized. "Hold up your hand." He squinted, and extended his arm. She took his hand in both of hers, and he felt his kidneys ache in surprise. Her hands were very soft. She pulled the hand towards her slightly, palm in. "Watch closely," she said.

Slowly, the outside hand slid around his own, her thumb finding a spot between the first and second knuckles, and the rest of her fingers finding a spot on the fleshy part of the palm beneath the thumb. Just when he thought his heart couldn't pound harder, she twisted.

Wailing, Shinji felt himself tip drunkenly as his elbow and wrist were wrenched around and up. He stopped just short of falling, and saw that her other hand had come to rest on both of theirs. Her arms were straight, and his own arm was locked at the tip of a very strong triangle.

"Did you see what I did?" she asked.

"Uh…kind of…" he gasped.

"Okay, now you do it," she said, letting go. He stood up, surprised. She held her hand towards him.

"What?" he asked, surprised.

"Do it." Feeling suddenly nervous, he grabbed her hand and began wrenching it. She looked at him, bemused and bored, as he struggled more with himself than her. She flicked her hand away and swatted him on the nose with the tip of her finger. It was a light touch, but one that stung and made his eyes water.

"Slowly," she said. "You have to start slowly, dumkopf. If you want to do this right, you have to start slow. Take my hand with both of yours." He sighed, and grabbed her hand. "God, you have soft hands," she mumbled.

"Does that matter?" he grated.

"It's nice," she said dismissively, "If a little girly, but whatever. Now, take that hand…" Slowly, she talked him through the motion. At a painstaking rate, he repeated the action, all the way to completion. She had him do it again, and again, until it felt easy. She made him do it on the other hand as well, and then showed him the motions without an opponent, to practice on his own.

"Not so difficult, is it?" she asked.

"No, not so difficult," he admitted, bashful and pleased. He felt like he had gained an inch with this little skill. "What else is there?"

"Maybe later. I'm hungry," she said, retreating back to the television. Shinji watched after her in wonder, before turning back to the eel.


	16. Tapestry

It was out of character for Rei to skip school, but she felt compelled by forces greater than keeping up appearances. The new puzzle that had landed in her lap was one so tantalizing, she simply had to leave everything else be. The resonance that flowed from Grendel…what was it?

She had liberated a laptop from the GeoFront, and sat in front of it now, tapping away, running multiple searches on the Grendel-class Evangelion. There was a lot written about it, but nothing that could be called substantial. Some of it was jingoistic praise of the American ability to grow it's own Evangelion independent of NERV interference, some of it was the scientific implications behind having access to samples of the tissue used to create the being. The scientific journals themselves were…disappointing. There were no names, no specifics, no photographs of individuals connected to the project. The defense contractors that provided the mechanical components were notably absent from any mention in the

It was all so strange.

It shouldn't be, of course, considering the secrecy that existed around Rei within the NERV organization. And yet, America was not NERV. It was a democratic nation, which meant information would always find a way into the public eye. That was just the nature of the beast: too many people means someone will talk at some point. So why had no one talked yet? The only thing Rei could assume was that the official stories were inflated to an extent, but in what details?

It was confusing.

There was a knock on the door. She looked towards the front of the apartment in confusion, and wondered who it could possibly be. Someone from NERV? Why? She stood, and opened the door.

"Glad to see you're still breathing," Misato said, her hands on her hips. Rei gazed up at her blankly. "You missed school today," Misato explained.

"Yes," Rei agreed.

"Care to explain?"

"I had more pressing issues to handle."

"Pressing issues?" Misato's eyebrow quirked. "That's a term-of-phrase I'd never thought I'd hear you say. Need to talk?"

"No," Rei said. "I need time."

"Time for what?" Rei said nothing, and Misato shrugged. "Whatever it is, you can't miss school unless approved by NERV, and we had nothing on the schedule for you today. You need to get to school on your assigned days."

"I can't guarantee it won't happen again," Rei said. Misato blinked, taken aback by the bluntness.

"Rei, it's not…really your decision," Misato said, suddenly irritated.

"It's not…that's why I cannot guarantee it," Rei explained patiently. Misato sighed, not wanting to get into this particular argument here on the doorstep. She seemed to be shifting gears, and had come to a decision.

"Why don't you take a break from…whatever it is you're doing, and come get some dinner with me, Asuka, and Shinji." Something about the way Misato said Shinji made Rei perk up. She didn't know why that would be, as she had seen him several times at the GeoFront. It was odd that all it took was Misato saying his name to remind Rei that she hadn't really _seen_ him at all. Did she miss that? She didn't know why she should.

Something about the awkward way he tried to engage with her. It seemed so…what was the word? Unnecessary. She thought then of the deflated way he had begun to appear around her, and a curious connection was made in her mind. She couldn't pin down the specifics yet…but something (or _Something_) told her that dinner at Misato's was the path she should take.

"That would be acceptable," she said.

* * *

Rei sat quietly during the car ride to Misato's apartment, watching the charade of normal life going about it's business outside. People living in the shadow of extermination, as though there were no great doom hanging over their head, no Plan or Event at the end of the road. Surreal. Unreal. False, fake, and temporary.

Why did it want to know the time?

The continued to press on Rei, for reasons she couldn't quite explain. The nature of the other Evas had always been clear to her, in their own way. The disdain of Unit-01, the rage and fear of Unit-oo. Unit-02 was still a mystery to her, but she could at least gauge that one…she could put her finger on it. Arrogance, it seemed. Grendel, though…

These things with the other Evas, they were under the surface. You had to look for them, but they were there. They were always pressing at the skin, like blood under thin scar tissue, itching and pulsing. Grendel was…oh, what was the phrase?

It wore itself on it's sleeves. There was nothing hidden about Grendel. It was out in the open, barely contained. Like the Pilot. Rei felt her eyelids twitch. She had not considered the Pilot yet. She had no reason to, because he was just one more human being among a sea of them, but thinking about it now, yes…yes, the Pilot was an aberration, as well. She knew that he was, but in a way…weren't they all aberrations? This Pilot…how did he work with Grendel? How did he…control Grendel? She had seen a thing or two about his Plug Suit. It was well-beyond simply interfacing with the Eva, beyond synchronization…it was domination. He dominated the Eva.

Rei felt surprised at the simplicity of changing her perspective on that. She had been trying for so long to find information that couldn't be found, when the answers may have been here the entire time.

"We're here," Misato said, and Rei blinked.

"What?"

"That's the third time I said it," Misato said, smiling patiently. "What are you woolgathering over there?"

"Nothing of importance," Rei mumbled, looking out the window. Indeed, there was the apartment. That was odd…she had never drifted out of the _now_ when considering things. She stepped out of the car and fell in pace behind Misato.

"I called ahead to let everyone know you were coming, so there'd be enough food," Misato said, as they walked up the stairs and down the balcony to her door at the corner. The officer let herself in and kicked her shoes off at the entrance. Rei followed meekly, glancing in. She could smell good things, but she also smelled meat and felt nauseous. She didn't feel that hungry, now.

"Oh, look, it's Wonder-Girl," Asuka said, staring at the television and not turning around. She was wearing a t-shirt and very short shorts. Flaunting herself, it would seem.

"Hello, Second," Rei said quietly.

"Hi, Rei," Shinji said, standing at the stove. She studied him, detecting something different in his demeanor. He seemed relaxed, comfortable. At ease. Was there something about cooking that made Shinji behave differently than when he was at the GeoFront? It was like looking at a different person.

"Hello, First," she said, quietly, and was surprised at the softness of her own voice. "What did I miss at school today?"

"Nothing important," he said, "There was a quiz, though. I think they'll make you take it when you go back in."

"It is of no concern."

"Uh…sure. We can talk about it more at dinner. You guys got in at just the right time…I'm just finishing up."

"Excellent!" Misato said, very happy. She had grabbed three beers from the fridge. Rei suspected that would not the be the only three beers of the evening. It seemed she would be walking home.

Rei decided to ponder that later, and sat at the table, not expecting to eat much. Meat was such a big part of what everyone ate, she fully expected nothing would be available for her to eat. She was surprised, then, when Shinji slid a plate in front of her with some tofu items.

"I heard you were coming over, so I made some vegetarian dishes for you," Shinji explained. Rei started to say something, but couldn't. She was caught off guard by that. She had been so used to people simply putting food in front of her, it was odd that someone had taken the time to consider her own preferences. Shinji smiled at her confusion shyly. Asuka sidled into a chair at the corner, watched the little exchange, and began to sulk.

She always sulked, Rei thought.


	17. Mesh

"Synchronization for 01 is at 50% and climbing…00 is holding steady at 70%," Hyuga mumured, rubbing his eyelid under his glasses. "02 is at 80% and holding. 78%…80%."

"Is it 78 or 80?" Cooper asked, leaning back in his chair to get a better look at Hyuga's monitor.

"It's fluctuating. Now 70…90. I mean, she's synched, but it's all over the place."

"Noisy brain?" Cooper asked.

"If anyone had a noisy brain, it would be that girl," Misato mumbled. She was gazing at the main screen, all four Pilots projected across it. Rei looked serene and distant, Shinji fidgety. Asuka looked pissed off, as usual, and Samson…who knew? With his synchronization helmet on, it was impossible to read his expression, and his bulky Plug Suit muted his body language. If anything, he looked like he was asleep.

"What's up with your bright boy?" she asked, looking down at Cooper. He leaned back in his chair, gazing upside down at Misato.

"Perfect synch, naturally, but there's some witchy stuff going on in the background."

"Witchy?"

"Yeah," he yawned, and leaned forward, tapping a few keys. "I mean, it was always there whenever there were synch-ups, right? Ever since He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Mentioned showed up-" Misato grimaced, "-it's gotten heavier. See here?" He pulled up a graphical display, and pointed to a series of oscillating waves. There were two, a green and a white one, mirroring each other almost exactly. One was the Pilot, and one was the Eva. They weren't perfect, of course: one would be more irregular, a human mind, and the other should be stable and steady, like a whale's heartbeat.

"See this?" he asked, pointing to one of the aberrational waves, inside the green pattern. "That's a pattern that repeats itself. If it was normal noise, it wouldn't ever appear in the same place twice. But…" he tapped at the keys, and the aberration was highlighted, as well as a series of almost exact aberrations. They repeated down the wavelength. "That's like lightning striking eighteen times in the same spot."

"So it's not random?" She mused, looking at the relatively sloppy wavelength in comparison to the steady and uniform one below it. She felt the acute absence of Ennis. "Am I supposed to be seeing this, Lieutenant?" she asked coyly.

"Of course not," Cooper chuckled. "But who cares? National secrets don't count much against extinction, and I don't figure you for the tattling kind." Her lips quirked into a smile, and she stared deeper at the wavelength.

"That is weird," she thought, "I mean, the Pilot's wavelength has the normal erratic elements, of course, but for something so regular…"

"The Pilot's?" Cooper gazed up at her, confused.

"Yeah…isn't this Samson?" she asked, tapping the green pattern.

"No, _this_ is Samson," Cooper said, pointing to the almost-perfect white pattern. "_This_ is Grendel."

"That's an Eva!?" Misato asked, incredulous. She heard the shuffling of chairs as the other bridge techs scooted over.

"Good God, what is wrong with that thing?" Aoba gasped.

"Okay, good, I'm not the only one who thinks that," Cooper said, waving his hands in the air.

"Are we done yet?" Asuka's voice cut through the air, peevish and testy. Misato blinked, realizing she had forgotten about them. She leaned over the console mike.

"Few more tests, I'm afraid," Misato said.

"Oh, come _on_!" the girl whined, twisting on the crash couch. "This is so demeaning! Can't we run a simulation or something?"

There was a crinkling sound, almost like a cricket chirping. "What is that?" Asuka snapped, looking around. Shinji had also perked up, confused by the noise. Rei looked mildly uncomfortable.

Misato realized it was Samson giggling, his voice muffled from his helmet. She sighed…usually, it was Shinji and Asuka who were at each other's throats. Samson had been replacing Shinji as the target of Asuka's ire, and it concerned her. Whereas her spats with Shinji tended to be childish and annoying, Asuka had nothing but seething contempt and hatred for Samson. It was difficult to tell, but Misato would bet the American held Asuka in the same regard.

"Is that laughing?" Asuka snapped. "Are you laughing at me, Yankee?"

"You shouldn't be so amusing," Samson crackled, "I'm still trying to figure out how you were the most professional of the Pilots."

"Who asked you for your opinion?" Asuka snapped, "I'm not here to 'amuse' you, you creep, I'm…wait, what do you mean _was_ the most professional!?"

"She's quick," Samson chided. "Takes her a little while to put it all together, but she gets it in the end."

"_I will destroy you_!"

"Enough!" Misato pleaded into the mike. "Will you two knock it off?"

"Roger," Samson said mechanically.

"He needs to leave me alone!" Asuka insisted.

"Just stop! Drop it! I know these tests are boring, but they're necessary, so please be patient, okay?" Misato sighed, and looked over her shoulder at the bridge crew. Four pairs of eyes gazed back at her, owl-like and curious.

"What are you looking at?"

"My mom, I think," Cooper said, trying to make a joke. Aoba started to laugh, and then stopped abruptly. As they scattered, Misato was aware of Ritsuko stepping into the command theater.

"He's right, you know. You were quite matriarchal," Ritsuko teased.

"Spare me," Misato snapped. She pointed at Ibuki. "I'm stepping out for a moment. You're in charge, Ibuki."

"But…I'm her senior…" Aoba began weakly. Cooper turned in his chair to add his own protest.

"Do I look like I care!?" Misato hissed. Aoba wilted, and Cooper's chair continued it's spin, carrying the American lieutenant back around to his console without a word.

"Get some coffee with me," Misato sighed, brushing past Ritsuko. The scientist rolled her eyes and followed her friend.

For a few seconds, there was silence on the bridge. The silence was broken by Ibuki giggling, "You're all my minions now." That earned a collective scoff.

* * *

Samson rolled in the LCL, his first languid movement since being inserted into the Plug.

_You shouldn't argue with that girl_, the voice said, meek but firm.

_Why ever not?_ He scratched at his belly. He couldn't feel it, of course, but the motion felt relaxing. He didn't have to worry about Grendel mimicking his actions: despite the high synchronization, the slave channels were cut.

_There's something about her…that's dangerous…and hurt. It's inappropriate…to pick on her_.

_To think I would get morality lessons from an Eva_, he mentally sighed.

_And…the Red One…doesn't like it._

_The Red One?_

_The Red One…the…Unit-o2? Yes, 02._

_02…doesn't like it?_

_No._ If Grendel could have shuffled its feet, it would have. _It's very clear about that._

_I'm glad you had that little chat with it,_ he said teasingly. There was a warble on his comm, and he opened the incoming communication request. Shinji's face appeared in the air next to him.

"Samps," he said, his face set, "Was that necessary?"

"What? With the…Asuka?" Shinji's nose crinkled at the almost-slur.

"Yes, with Asuka," Shinji said, "She's difficult, yeah, but-"

"You're not jealous, are you?" Samson said, teasing. Shinji's expression didn't change, but his cheeks turned pink.

"You shouldn't have done that," Shinji said.

"Ah, whatever," Samps said, waving his hand indifferently. Somewhere in the back of his mind, the Itsy-Bitsy Spider floated to the surface for a brief moment, and he blinked it back down. "Hey, what are you doing after this?"

"The test?"

"Yeah."

"I was gonna go home and cook for Asuka."

"You're quite the homemaker, ain't ya?"

"Why do you ask?" Shinji mumbled, trying to change the subject.

"Is there anywhere in Tokyo-3 that does good American style burgers, or steaks?"

"Uh…I have no idea."

"We should go grab a bite." Shinji looked surprised at the suggestion, and shrugged.

"Maybe," he said, and the line cut.

Samson rolled in the LCL, chuckling. "Maybe," he mumbled, pondering the talk. Shinji hadn't stuttered, not once in their talk. That was a recent development. The boy smiled to himself and crossed his arms, pondering that. What was that, the term? A constructive adaptation to present conditions, that's what the doctors would have classified it as. That's what Colin would have said.

Samson's smile turned into a grin, feral and not entirely friendly. Ah…Colin. He would expect to debrief Samson after the test, and those debriefings left him…foggy. If he was to persuade Shinji for a chance to get away from these…people…he couldn't have a session with Colin. That would not be constructive.

The Itsy-Bitsy Spider fluttered under the surface.

* * *

Shinji bit his lip, pondering the offer from Samson as he keyed on Asuka's link.

"-tear out his eyes, and spit into the sockets!" she screamed. He quickly toggled out of the connection: she was still wound up. Instead, he keyed over to Rei.

"Yes, Third?" she asked, dull but polite.

"Why do you think Asuka and Samson hate each other so much?" he asked.

"The Second and Fourth Child are very similar, in many ways," she said automatically, as if she had been waiting to be asked the question. "It is inevitable that the two would clash. Does this surprise you?"

"Not…not really," Shinji murmured. "It bothers me, maybe."

"With Fourth irritating Second, you are no longer the target of her disdain," Rei observed.

"Well, I wouldn't say _that_…" Shinji added, but considered Samson's teasing statement. _You're not jealous, are you?_

Yeah, he kind of was. He felt butterflies at thinking it. Why should he be jealous? Why would he want to be? Honestly, he felt one hundred percent sympathetic with Samson, in why he picked the fight. Asuka asked for it, most of the time. His first instinct, however, was to shield Asuka from Samson. That was odd, to him.

"Um…Shinji?" The boy felt a word form in the back of his throat. Rei had just said his name. That was odd.

"Yeah, Rei?"

"Last night…" she said, "It was…considerate of you to make tofu dishes for me. I wanted to…thank you for that."

"That's…well, gee, that's fine!" He smiled sheepishly, and scratched the back of his head. "I just hope it tasted good."

"The taste was…good," Rei agreed, pensively. She cut the link, evidently done with talking. Shinji shook his head, surprised at that. Rei had said his name and offered gratitude, almost completely out of the blue. He had stood up for Asuka, of all people. The children were changing, it seemed.

Well, some of them, at least. He keyed up Asuka's link.

"-feed him his liver! Uncooked!"

"Are you done yet?" Shinji sighed. Asuka had begun to breathe heavily, her face contorted in animal hatred.

"…No," she mumbled. Shinji waited, and she said nothing more.

"…Are you…sure you're not?" Shinji ventured.

"I…made myself dizzy," Asuka mumbled, leaning back onto the couch and closing her eyes.


	18. In the Wings

**Notes from GobHobblin:** So, I like to pump tunes in the background while I type, right? So I have an observation on one…MTC by sr3l is a dirty and immature song. Yet…it sounds…so damn good…

* * *

Misato's coffee was at least five parts liquid creamer to one part actual coffee. Ritsuko crinkled her nose at the syrupy mess.

"Don't judge me," Misato murmured, sipping at her cup. "I'm allowed my vices."

"As long as it's not drinking yourself blind or destroying your love life, I'm all for it," Ritsuko chided. Misato made a face, but continued drinking.

"What brought you by the bridge?"

"I think I might murder Dr. Colin and stuff him in an air vent. Want to help?"

"Really? Do tell," Misato said, smiling. In his short time here, Misato had the fortune of only encountering the American once, in her first unpleasant meeting. His exploits, however, had been making the rounds in the GeoFront.

"He's been positively lurking around my research theaters. Down in the paddocks, around the MAGI server rooms, trying to get access to Terminal Dogma…and generally being a little parasite…I can't get away from him." She snorted. "I can't get a moments peace. Everywhere I turn, there's that wormy, insistent, condescending little…"

Misato watched as Ritsuko trailed off, and felt her mind drift back to what had happened before she had excused herself from the bridge.

"Ritz," she said, "Have you had the opportunity to check out Grendel?"

"Not really," Ritsuko murmured, "Not beyond what I've seen in the networking with MAGI. To be fair, though, we won't let them look at our Evas…or our Pilots…" Ritsuko smiled faintly.

"Knew I was working around to that too, didn't you?" Misato teased. "There's a lot of weird angles on this, and I feel like the Americans should be more clever about it. I mean, let's assume they have ulterior motives…okay, they _do_, everyone at this level does…why does it seem so sloppy?"

"Sloppy? I don't follow."

"I just got finished looking at a graphic readout of the American Eva and its Pilot, right? The Eva's synch patterns are…highly erratic. The Pilots? Like a machine. Too perfect." Ritsuko said nothing, but one eyebrow quirked slightly.

"Now, here's the deal: I don't know how the Americans made their Eva, or how they trained their Pilot, but from the outside looking in, I would say…there has to be at least three, maybe four different agendas pulling at the American mission. Maybe more. There's no such thing as a perfect military operation, but this looks…really erratic. See what I'm saying?"

"You're saying that the left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing because the brain won't tell either where the legs are carrying them," Ritsuko said.

Misato smirked. "Something like that."

"You sound like Kaji."

Misato rolled her eyes in irritation at the name. "You've been chatting with him?"

"Not infrequently," Ritsuko purred. "He had some interesting things to say about the blackout." Misato turned pink. "Oh, don't get that look. He didn't say anything scandalous. Just amusing."

"Has he been talking about this stuff, too?" Misato mumbled.

"Musing, mostly. We bounce irritations off of each other. You really should chat with him when you can." Misato slunk down, looking deflated and stubborn all at once. "Stop being childish, Misato. Really, a Major and acting like a teenager."

"A young woman and acting like a spinster," Misato said testily. Ritsuko smiled.

"Last time I checked, we were _both _Christmas cakes, my dear," she said, as Misato's phone beeped. She answered it quickly.

"Major," Ibuki's quiet voice said, "We've wrapped up the testing…I think we've gotten all we can get for today. The kids are exhausted and Asuka's threatening to take Unit-02 for a walk at ground level."

"And Samson?" There was a click as the line transferred.

"Major, this Lieutenant Cooper," the American tech officer answered, "No changes from before. In fact, I think he may have gone to sleep."

"At least someone's getting rest. Okay, pack it up for the day. We might as well let them get out and go home," she sighed. She closed her phone and looked at Ritsuko. "Kaji aside," she murmured, "I would like you to take a look at the readings from Grendel and Samson's synch tests, please."

"Of course. And, Kaji aside…please talk to Kaji. I'm under the impression he would like to bring this up to you, but he hasn't yet."

"I've never known Kaji to hesitate about doing anything at all in my life," Misato replied.

"I know, which is why I bring it up to you. Just humor me on it, okay? Too many weird things going on around here, with the Yanks coming and all," Ritsuko mumbled.

"We're fighting massive alien constructs with four-hundred foot tall biological cyborgs piloted by children. The Yankees are what weirds you out?" Misato teased, exiting the break room. And yet, as she did, she had the feeling that it had to be something truly unnerving if the Yanks _were_ what they thought of as being the weird factor.

For her part, Ritsuko smiled sadly after Misato. _Ah, hon_, she thought sadly, _If only you knew how weird it truly was._

* * *

Ennis was trying to enjoy a lunch in the officer's mess in Yankee Land (as the American section of the GeoFront had recently been coined), when the all-too-familiar sound of soft footsteps filled his ears. He laid his grilled cheese-and-ham sandwich on the plate and rubbed his eyes.

"Yes, Dr. Colin, what can I do for you?" he asked in mock politeness.

"That is service," Colin said in his typically smug tone, "Asking before I even open my mouth. If all the personnel here were as responsive in their other actions as you were right there, I could rest easy."

"Get to the point, I'm trying to eat."

"I was wondering if you knew where Samson was. I need to do a check-up."

Ennis fixed the man with a blunt stare. "That was _your_ job, as of your arrival. You should be telling _me_ where he is. Further, have you considered asking CPT Merritt?" It was a subtle jab, but to his credit, it wasn't lost on Colin. A small reminder that there was someone doing his job before, and that Ennis had long since decided he rather'd Merritt had kept doing it.

"You see, there's this _thing_ called the chain of command," Colin said, "Which I would think you, as an officer, would know about. I go to the lieutenant, and if they don't know something, I go to the captain. Now that I have done that, I'm at the top, talking to the Major." Ennis' eyes narrowed dangerously. So, Colin _had_ asked Merritt, and Merritt didn't know. He could have saved them both time and trouble by being upfront with that. He had not, and now they were here with Ennis losing his patience.

"He's disappeared again, has he?" This would the…seventh time, now. They had tried chipping him, but that was as successful as trying to hold air in your hands. In the end, he always returned, so they weren't too worried about it…well, not _too_ worried about it. That was all evident fact, though.

"Yes. Yes, he has, which makes me wonder what possible reason you all could have been assigned security on him," Colin said snappishly. "I've been having trouble determining what you pass as competence here."

Ennis counted to ten, studying Colin. The look he gave was a well-practiced one, the kind that quailed subordinates and bureaucrats of all types. It had no discernible affect on Colin. "Dr. Colin," he said, quietly, "The boy is your responsibility, yes?"

"Of course," Colin snapped.

"So I should be asking _you_ why _you_ lost him," Ennis said calmly. Colin gave a tight, cold smile, and said nothing more. Ennis leaned back. "He goes, and he comes back. The first few times, I was extremely nervous about it, and frankly, I still am. But he always comes back, and you know why? He likes the fighting. If he went away, he wouldn't get to fight. So, if you can curb this wanderlust, I strongly encourage you to try, and I will applaud your success. As for the time being, however, we just have to be patient. Now, if you have nothing else to say, kindly piss off so I can enjoy my meal in peace." Colin's face went flat, and Ennis waited him out. It was not professional to do that, nor was it especially wise, considering he had no knowledge of Colin's connections back home. The man was in dire need of a humbling experience.

"Well," Colin finally said. "I will allow you to enjoy…your…sandwich. I'll keep you appraised, Major. I only ask, so humbly, that you do the same for me." Colin marched sharply away, leaving Ennis alone with his meal.

* * *

Fuyutsuki studied the image in the folder, one fingernail slowly and methodically scratching his ear.

"Is this confirmed?" he asked quietly.

"Yes," Gendo murmured. "It's made three appearances, so far. Nothing destructive as of yet, but we can't get a tab on it, and it's coming closer."

"Why haven't we alerted the staff about this?" Fuyutsuki asked. "Operations should be preparing immediately."

"This is a bipedal creature similar in appearance, at least shape, to Sachiel. Two arms, two legs, apparently humanoid. What about that sounds…accurate?"

"Accurate?"

"In regards as to what we _should_ be expecting?" Gendo poked. Fuyutsuki eyed the image, then it hit him. He was often so focused on Operations, that the overall picture sometimes eluded. Such as the fact that there was an order to the Angels appearance, and that there was supposed to be a very particular one showing up.

One that was _not_ humanoid.

Fuyutsuki dropped the folder. "This Angel does not exist."

Gendo nodded. "It's nowhere to be found in the Dead Sea Scrolls. This is a new entity."

"What was the next one due?"

"Sahaquiel," Gendo mused. "We only have vague descriptions of what it should be, but we know that it would have appeared in orbit. This is…" Gendo shrugged. "Different."

"Clearly," Fuyutsuki said in a dry tone. "Things are deviating."

"Can you imagine what the old men are thinking about this?" Gendo said, his face expressionless but what could have been a twinkle in his eye.

"You seem remarkably calm," Fuyutsuki noted.

"The end goal is unaffected by this," he said. "We simply adjust to new circumstances, that's all."

"So Yui's legacy is not…damaged by this?"

"For the immediate future, no. We simply have to keep tabs of any more deviations." Gendo rubbed his eyes then, a rare admission of exhaustion. He tried to keep his human qualities hidden, but Fuyutsuki was by his side more than anyone else. He could only keep up a facade for so long. "We'll keep tabs…" He trailed off, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"What's the matter, Gendo?"

"My head hurts," he said matter-of-factly. "And my eyes are tired. Nothing some coffee won't fix."

"When was the last time you got any rest?" Fuyutsuki asked. Gendo gave him an unreadable look, and Fuyusuki smiled gently. "I'm the first one in and the last one to leave, and I've never beaten you to work or followed you out of the door. You practically live, eat, and breathe this place. When was the last time you rested?"

"I get the necessary rest I need," he mumbled, suddenly feeling chastised and not knowing why. Imagine, of all things, answering to Fuyutsuki!

"I'm just suggesting that you take some time for a rest every now and then. Perhaps get to know your son a bit more," Fuyutsuki ventured. Gendo gave him a hard look, and laid his hands on the table.

"We'll continue tracking this new entity, to be referred to as the Tenth Angel, until we can determine what it is and where it came from. That is all." He didn't turn away, but Fuyutsuki knew he had been dismissed.

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin:** I don't remember when it came out (had to be when I was in college or something), but the 'There She Is' cartoon music videos are the greatest thing to involve rabbits and cats in love. That is all.


	19. Here Be Monsters

It was easy to forget that Rei Ayanami was a girl, with a girl's mind and a girl's heart. It was so easy to forget that she herself tended to, from time to time. Then the night came on, and she would sleep, and little things would whisper to her from the empty corners of her room. Little insects that would tiptoe across the floor, over the bed, into her ear, and tell her all the things she thought, she knew, she was certain was certain.

She stood in a field of glass, where dark was a thing that touched her soul in ways profound and intimate, tender and terrifying. The clouds roiled above her, their thunder silent in the expanse of her mind.

_I am dreaming_, she thought. Sometimes, she knew, and other times, she didn't. She knew now. She turned slowly in place, her bare feet kissing the earth in a false-sense, solid like water. Solid like hate.

_I know hate_, she thought, _I know it. I've felt it, I think. I think I feel…I…do feel…sometimes. What am I dreaming?_ She circled in place, her hands rubbing her face, and her stomach, and her arms. She relished the feel of skin under finger tips, something she didn't do when awake. She didn't know why she did now. It seemed natural.

She looked down, and saw a doll at her feet, the hair clumps of black yarn and the eyes little buttons. It wore a blue dress, and sat slumped over. Rei studied it for a long time before it stood up and began to walk towards her. This seemed perfectly natural to Rei. It was, after all, a dream.

"Do you know me?" it asked. "Do you really know me?"

"I've never seen you before," Rei answered.

"I think I might be someone else," it whispered. "I think I was someone special, once. That went away a long time ago. I really want it to be over now."

"That doesn't make any sense," Rei said quietly. "You are obviously who you are: you are a doll."

"I wasn't always," the doll insisted. "I had a heart, you know. It burned very bright."

"You are a doll," Rei insisted back, patiently. "It makes sense, you know. This is a dream, so a doll can speak in a dream. Strange, though…" Rei cocked her head to the side. "I don't know why I would dream about a doll."

"I…don't want to be a doll anymore…" it begged. "He makes me _do_ these things. There's always screaming. Always."

"Who?" Rei asked, and then felt she was not alone anymore, as though there was something in her head. Or in the room. For a brief, almost lucid moment, Rei then wondered if there was, in fact, someone in the room. It was a clinical thought, and one that was so detached from her concept of personal safety that she didn't even feel the fear of self-preservation. Yet…the thought of who it could be…of who it might be…names and faces didn't come, but that presence seemed to carry a note of claustrophobia about it. Rei felt suddenly as small as the doll.

"Please," it whimpered, "He's coming." It pushed it's arms up over its eyes. "He always comes. When will he stop?" Rei felt the wind blow, and turned to look.

All she saw was a smile. It was a smile that cut the air like a sore, turning in and on and around itself in an eternal field of teeth and bone and gum. They formed many mouths, but only one mouth, and Rei felt wonder at it.

"I like to collect things sometimes," the many mouths said in one voice. "But I break things. It is so difficult…it waxes like caramel, you know." Rei felt a sickly sweat push in the small of her soul, trying to understand what that meant. It was gibberish, it was just dream-speech. It shouldn't mean anything. But it _did_, it _had_ to, something about it was so fundamental that she couldn't ignore it. And the voice was just…so…_familiar_…

"He won't go away!" the doll shrieked, and Rei's teeth chattered. It was so loud, so close, so real. The teeth began to melt into the earth. Someone was walking between the teeth, a nude boy with black hair and such _pretty_ eyes…

Shinji stopped walking, leaning one way and the next in a manner that made her think of dogs, his eyes intent. He slowly drifted forward, his lips peeling back from his gums in a false-smile, and when he spoke, the words seemed to come of their own in the air…and the voice was Samson's…and then she _knew_ where she had heard the voice before.

"It's empty," he said, as Shinji's lips rolled up over his head and Samson pushed through, tearing the skin. "It's empty."

* * *

Rei awoke trembling and sweaty, as the images swirled in her head. Dream images, dream sounds, dream rubbish. They never made any sense, even when she could remember them all. They never made the slightest bit of sense.

She curled up on her bed, clawing at the filthy sheets. It was rare a dream made her feel so…so…she lacked the words for it. She lacked the words for how she often felt like this, when all the bland indifference of the world suddenly seemed to burst like a cyst and the corruption flowed out. She would tremble, shudder, weep, retch until the demons vanished, and then the world would take it's colorless hue again. She would be Rei, and she would take all the hurt into herself, all the noise and thunder, like a black hole.

This time she couldn't. Something in that dream had touched her, touched her so deep that she couldn't shake herself from the mounting hysteria. Something had just been broken.

_No_, the analytical part of her mind commented, observing her state with a detached indifference, _Not just now. It has been broken for a little while longer, I would think. We understand the fundamental flaw of self, do we not?_

"It's meaningless," she heard herself say, "What is it to feel? When do they teach that?" Slowly, softly, the shuddering subsided, and Rei felt herself push back into her shell, a hermit crab returning to the dark and the safe. She remained curled up, but her face went lax, and she was again as she was known to others.

It was easy to forget Rei Ayanami was a girl. It was easy to forget that she could feel. When she did, it terrified her.

* * *

"Oh, sure, _everyone_ is _soo_ impressed!" Rei studied Asuka from behind her bland mask, as the girl held court in Class 2A while Nebukawa no Sensei was conspicuously absent. It happened, from time to time, that he would just not be there, and the students had something of a free reign on the classroom. Many of the girls would flock to Asuka, while the boys would sit back and try to look indifferent. Shinji, Kensuke, and Toji were near the window, discussing something in quiet tones. She felt an odd sensation that she realized was envy as she looked at him. She didn't find herself jealous of Asuka, with her minions about, but she did find herself jealous of Shinji, and the close relationship that had developed between him and the other two boys.

It was something she had seen as extemporaneous, unnecessary. As vestigial as the appendix. After last night's dream, which lingered like a corpse under the dirt of her mind…she found herself questioning that opinion.

"If it wasn't for a _teensy_ little blackout, I would have been all over that last Angel!" Asuka snapped, flicking her wrist in a _just so_ manner.

"Oh, come on, stop teasing!" one of the girls said. "What's he like? We _know_ there's a new Pilot!"

"Spare me!" Asuka grunted. "He's a creep. A creepy creep, with this weird little superiority complex. Thinks he's God's gift to Piloting. No finesse, no art." She rolled her eyes. "I swear, those people at NERV will take _anyone_ with a nervous system these days!"

"But is he _cute_?" another girl insisted, trying to bring the priorities in the conversation back to those issues that truly mattered.

"Flawless," Asuka said dryly, "Like an action figure. It's disgusting. I'm guessing he had to have some sort of surgery at some point. To be so _vain_ at that age!" When Asuka said 'action figure,' a curious connection was made in her mind, between that of dolls and boys. Boys did not play with dolls, but they played with action figures, and what were those but dolls for boys? The strange pathways of logic in her mind connected back to the frightened doll begging her for help last night, and for a moment, Rei thought that she was no longer in the classroom. That the limited and fragile walls of 2A had vanished like smoke, and she was holding that doll in her hands.

She had never had a doll. Though a part of her _remembered_ having a doll, but she couldn't for the life of her put the image together. She wondered what it was like to be a little girl, with a doll, and pretending it was a friend, or a little child all her own. Someone so helpless, so…broken. The little doll was there in her hands in that moment, it's button eyes seeming to scream for help.

"I think you're in love with him, Asuka!" a voice from so far away jeered, and a sound of disgust followed it. It was dry emotion, so contemptuous that even embarrassment could not survive in it's wake.

"You clearly don't know my tastes," someone said. The doll was starting to cry, but the tears were black, and that made no sense. Something about it reminded Rei of…something. Something…

She couldn't put words to what was happening in her chest, in her soul, but it _hurt_…so badly, and in that moment, a brief moment, she felt hot air on the back of her neck and a sudden feeling of disgust washed over her. There was a sound, something like like retching, or moaning, or screaming, or all one in the same. And then she was back in her seat, there was water on the desk, and she realized that the sound was her.

Rei glanced up, to see _everyone_ staring at her. This didn't bother her, and yet something about it _did._

"Rei?" She looked over at Shinji, who was kneeling next to her in concern. "Are…you okay?"

"…I think I might be someone else," she said quietly, her face sticky with tears and mucus.

* * *

Shinji stared at the girl, surprised at how _red_ her face was after sobbing. He didn't entirely know what to do, as he had never seen Rei exhibit more than little, hidden snatches of what could be _mistaken_ for emotion, much less have a full sobbing breakdown in the middle of class. Something told him he needed to do _something_, but what could he do? He glanced over to Asuka, for guidance.

Naturally, there was none to be found there. She was, in fact, standing at the far end of the room with her eyes wides and her jaw practically on the floor. He figured that being who she was, she would have loved nothing more than to see Rei have such an 'attack,' but like the proverbial cat that finally got outside, she had no clue what to do with it. No one in the classroom did. They had all created such a mental image of who Rei was and what she did, that to see her behave like this was as fundamental a shift in their world as the sun going black.

"Let's go," he said, helping her to her feet.

"I think I've made a mess," she mumbled, touching her face.

"No, you're okay," Shinji said, walking towards the door. Should he call Misato? Maybe. He didn't know what _else_ to do. As he escorted her to the door, Toji was the first to move, scrambling across the classroom to hold the door for them and follow them out. A moment later, Kensuke realized he was alone and hurried after them. The rest of the classroom sat in silence and wonder.

It was broken a moment later in a manner that very nearly killed the weaker-hearted amongst them as Asuka shrieked, "What the _hell!?_"

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin:** My fics aren't dead! But I am looking for work right now and I've got some wicked writer's block. Mass Effect isn't helping, either (why, my wife, o why did you get me hooked on it?!) Either way, I've been…vacant.


	20. Dessicate

"Do yo dance, do yo dance, get yo mother mmphing dance on…"

"What are you doing?" Cooper stopped his bizarre little chant and glanced up at Misato. She was glowering over his station, her arms crossed, not unlike his mother when he was doing something she didn't approve of.

"I'm…you know…doing my…doing my dance," he offered, feeling suddenly very small.

"Stop it," Misato snapped. "It's stuck in my head now, and if it stays there, I'm holding you responsible."

"It's just a dance song," Cooper said. "For dancing…"

"I swear to God," Misato hissed, making Cooper flinch. "Synch tests!"

"Synch tests!" he parroted, toggling out of the current simulation he was running and pulling up the document he had compiled on that very subject. "Right, so after all that with Samson and Grendel, I went back over the previous couple of tests on record, right? I also began running some probes into Grendel's hard drive by 'ghosting' the presence of a Pilot."

"'Ghosting?'" Misato asked, leaning against the console table.

"Yeah, it used to be just stuffing something with a pulse into a neural interface with Grendel. Used to be dogs. Now, I can simulate it by running an EKG pattern recorded off of Samson's brainwaves, pulse, all that. It's like removing the brain from the body, and then poking the areas that let it 'see' and 'smell.' So it's 'seeing' and 'smelling' in the absence of a body. Right?"

"…Sure," Misato said, somewhat following.

"So, that erratic pattern? Yeah, that's been there from as early as I can find. Started real bad, leveled out a bit, but never settled enough for the Grendel Project to be okay'd. Until, that is, when Samson was integrated into Grendel's neural network."

"So…what, he 'calmed it down? It was worse than this?'"

"Ah, no, actually," Cooper said, "He _made_ it worse."

"Uh…huh?" Misato sat up and turned around, looking at the screen.

"Yeah, you can see a corollary pattern here. Ever since he became the Pilot, it's synch rate has become more erratic. But, and here's the funny thing…Grendel is working at it's peak efficiency, better than your Evas. In _spite_ of this little 'glitch' here."

"That…is very odd," Misato murmured.

"That is very odd," Cooper agreed. At that moment, Misato's phone rang in her coat pocket, and she answered it.

"Capt. Katsuragi, Nerv Operations…uh…hang on a minute," she murmured, stepping away from the bridge. She didn't make it ten paces before she stopped, and said in a shrill tone, "She did _what_!?"

* * *

Rei sat with her hands folded on her lap, Shinji next to her. Toji stood with his arms crossed, and Kensuke bounced in a chair on the other side of the room. It was a small lounge adjacent to the main school office, and the sounds of administrative work issued from the other side of the door.

"This is unnecessary," she said in her normal, bland tone.

"Then tell us why you started crying," Toji said bluntly. She gazed at him, and he clamped his mouth shut. She was a creepy chick, and he had to look away. Kensuke looked between them, began to offer something, then thought the better of it. And then the thought vanished, and he offered it anyway.

"Maybe it's PTSD," he said, "You know, because you're a Pilot. You got, like, battle stress and stuff, and any day now, you're going to be doing martial arts in front of a mirror talking about how you miss the war."

"Kensuke, what the hell are you talking about?" Toji said, exasperated.

"I was trying to make a joke," he said, though now hearing it back, it sounded awful. "It's true, though. Maybe you have PTSD."

"Why would I have that?" Rei asked, blandly.

"Well…you have been through a lot," Shinji reasoned.

"So?"

"So…it tends to break you down."

"In what ways?" That was a question Shinji realized he was poorly equipped to answer. It forced him to look at himself for reference, and when he did, he didn't like it. It made him want to squirm and hide. He managed an answer as best he could.

"Emotions are like a muscle," he reasoned, "They start to wear out when strained."

"Emotions are a hindrance, it seems," Rei reasoned. "The point of Piloting is to fight and to die, not to feel."

"Everyone feels, Rei. Even you," Toji said.

Rei stared at him for a moment, then glanced down at the floor. "This conversation is pointless." The door opened with a suddenness that Toji practically climbed the wall behind him, and everyone jerked up. Misato was standing in the doorway breathless, staring at Rei.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Nothing," Rei said.

"Rei started crying," Toji and Kensuke said as one.

"Nothing happened," Rei insisted, sounding peevish even though the tone and pitch of her voice didn't change.

"Crying?" Misato fixed her eyes on Shinji, and he swallowed.

"More like sobbing?" he answered, though the lilt made it sound like he was asking a question. He felt Rei stiffen next to him, and he immediately felt guilt.

"Sobbing…Rei was…" Misato seemed to blank, and then shook her head. "Okay, I'm not sure I know how to handle this. Rei, what…what were you…what caused…why was…?"

"It was nothing. I simply had a misunderstanding about something. It's gone now," Rei said. Shinji glanced at her hands, folded in her lap, and saw that she was digging the nails of one into the other. She was lying.

"Let's…I'm gonna take you home, Rei. Shinji, just go back to class. I've got it from here, okay? Thanks for calling."

"Sure, Misato," Shinji said.

As the boys filed out, Kensuke said, "Hope you feel better, Rei." Toji nodded, adding, "No one in class will say anything. I'll make sure of that." Rei watched them leave in wonder, unsure of what to make of that.

* * *

Shinji separated from his friends and went to a water fountain. He felt empty, and just putting something, _anything_ into his stomach might help. As he drank, he felt a presence next to him, and glanced up. Asuka was standing there, glowering with crossed arms.

"What the _hell_ was that about?" she asked.

"Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"Who's gonna know?" she retorted. "What was the deal with Wonder Girl?"

"I don't know," Shinji admitted. "It was out of character, wasn't it?"

"Out of character? That's so helpful, I am glad you're here to explain this to me!" Asuka grumped.

"_You_ asked _me_," Shinji replied hotly. "You left the classroom to find me and ask me. What do you want from me?" Asuka said nothing, her brows furrowed and her mouth set.

"Rei…is probably under pressure," Shinji said patiently. "She probably just let it get to her. It could have happened to any of us." Asuka's face went ugly at the inference.

"Rei is weak," Asuka said, quietly. It seemed like she was trying to convince herself of that. Shinji stared at her for a moment, feeling that helplessness take hold, and then, slowly…it was replaced with anger. He was tired. Something in his soul seemed to start thumping, beating, like bleeding shins into cracked leather. _Rei is weak_…

"So are you," he said in an ugly voice. Asuka whirled at him, her eyes wide in shock and hurt. Shinji turned and walked away without seeing what happened next. He did not go back to 2A.

* * *

In a dim room that overlooked the skyline of Chicago, a man smoked a sweet-smelling cigarillo, occasionally sucking through his teeth. His companion regarded the skyline, swirling a glass of brandy.

"The First Child had a breakdown, recently," the Drinking Man announced. "Just got the news. Sobbing fit." The Smoking Man chuckled.

"Poor little Mary," he murmured. "Where have her sheep gone?"

"The boy is having a better affect than we could have anticipated," his companion concluded. "The President and his cronies will be upset."

"They're bleeding hearts," the Smoking Man dismissed. "Trying to play nice with the neighbors, try to let the past be the past. There is no past." His voice dropped as he spoke, and he dragged at the cigarillo.

"They were never happy with using children as weapons," the Drinking Man added. "This may cause them to reel things in a bit."

"The problem with the President," the Smoking Man mused, "Is he is too 'Old America.' Trying to coddle the Japanese while going at Nerv. Huh…" He flicked ash in a derisive gesture. "They're no allies, only pieces on the board. We should never have given up that office."

"It was too public. The Committee made a sound decision," the Drinking Man said defensively. "They've also been uncertain with the nature of control on the boy. They're wondering if we should have seeded our people through the delegation."

"Our measures of control are enough," the Smoking Man countered. "I still think it was a bad idea to send Dr. Colin…he's tied to directly to us."

"There have been questions, though," the Drinking Man hissed, placing his glass on a side-table. "Questions asked about the boy. Questions from the top, and I am certain within the delegation."

"Let them ask questions, then. By the time they get answers, we'll have Adam and be all the stronger for it," the Smoking Man countered. "This isn't tactics, it's strategy. The short term looks awkward and messy, and it's supposed to. They're all scrambling to make all the random pieces fit."

"But they don't fit," the Drinking Man concluded, "So by the time they'll have anything to trace to us, we'll have achieved our goals. I know this, this is academic. I still don't like the variables."

"Every system has to have a little give in it, or it lacks tensile strength," his companion explained. "That's another reason why I don't like sending Colin…without him, the boy was unpredictable, but that wasn't a bad thing. Now, we can imagine exactly how he'll act. And that could be…"

"No, I understand. Perhaps we can just withdraw Colin at a key time."

"Perhaps…" For a moment, they sat in silence, regarding the bright lights of Chicago, the stubborn and powerful lines of it's skyscrapers grabbing at the sky.

"Seele is quite in the dark, isn't it?" the Smoking Man murmured. The Drinking Man made a soft, derisive sound in his throat.

"For the time being. They know we exist, of course. Not our purpose, though," he added, sipping the brandy. The Smoking Man shrugged.

"That's inevitable," he mumbled, tapping some ash into a tray. "What does Mr. Grave have to say on the issue?"

"He's done his best," the Drinking Man said diffidently. "The report to the Committee contained areas where possible leaks could have occurred, but he made sure they were airtight. He theorizes that Keel Lorenz just…deduced it."

"Just 'deduced' it and started sniffing around," the Smoking Man mumbled, then chuckled. "He couldn't have hoped to be discreet. He had to have known we are watching his organization."

"I'm sure he does," the Drinking Man reasoned, "Stir the water enough, though, and things rise to the surface. He will find us out. That's as certain as death."

"All death is uncertain," the Smoking Man grumbled, slouching down into his chair. "Do you think they'll move up the timetable for the HIP?"

"No. They have a playbook, I think. Probably these 'Dead Seas Scrolls' that have fluttered on the wind. We have time to commandeer it."

"Or prevent it," the Smoking Man insisted. "Extinction does not equal dominance."

"It may be more 'transcendence,'" the Drinking Man reasoned. "Immortality with a few key players running the show."

"That is voodoo," the Smoking Man said loudly. "Smoke and mirrors. Power, _real_ power, is transcendent. You fight for it, you keep it, and then you die, and those you prepared come along and take your place. That is the cycle, that is the only way to get any movement out of it. That is…torpid."

"This could become a fight in the Committee," the Drinking Man concluded. "There are those that think that, and there are those that agree with me."

"We've had worse fights," the Smoking Man said dismissively. "This will be another one. The fact of the matter is that Instrumentality is a flawed concept with an uncertain outcome. The Group survives on certainty."

"True. True." The Drinking Man picked up his brandy. "In that case, why not kill the Children?"

"It wouldn't end the prospect, only extend the timetable," the Smoking Man explained. "Besides, they are a strategic resource. If we can appropriate them, that would be a best case outcome. Killing them would deny them to the enemy, but only in the short term. No, you need to give them something wounded. Something that they invest in, that becomes a millstone. A tainted reserve is better than a starving enemy."

"I'd prefer the starving enemy," the Drinking Man sighed. "You're better at these deductions than me, though."

"You're more ruthless," the Smoking Man said with a shrug. "When you choose to be."

"You say the kindest things," the Drinking Man chuckled. They sat there in the dark, letting the words float overhead, as they viewed the skyline, and over it, some hazy, half-forgotten future.


	21. Severance

Misato was halfway to Rei's home when her phone rang again. She glanced at it to see it was Ritsuko.

"Yeah, Ritz?"

"What's this about Rei crying in class today?" Misato felt an odd, creeping feeling at the question.

"And how would you know that?" Misato asked.

"Word just got to me. You didn't think that Rei could have a public meltdown and I wouldn't hear about it," Ritsuko said. "Where are you taking her?"

"I'm driving her home right now," Misato answered. _How did you know I was taking her anywhere_? The timing and the nature of the call sounded an alarm bell in Misato's mind. She glanced over at Rei, who was gazing silently at the dashboard in front of her.

"Bring her to the GeoFront," Ritsuko said. "We need to find out what happened. If this sort of thing could happen on a mission."

"I think it would be better for her to go home and get some rest," Misato countered.

"You're not qualified to make a decision in this matter," Ritsuko said patiently. "Please bring her to the GeoFront." She hung up, and Misato blinked. She had to pull the car to the side of the road, lest she drift onto a sidewalk in her shock. She stared at the phone in her hand.

"Is something wrong?" Misato looked at Rei, who gazed back serenely.

"Nothing," Misato lied, "Nothing at all. They just want me to take you back to the GeoFront, is all." The girl's expression didn't change, but she visibly deflated. Misato put the phone in a cup-holder and cleared her throat. "What do you want, Rei?"

"What…do I…" Rei seemed confused by the question.

"Would you like me to take you back to your apartment instead?" Rei looked back blankly.

"They said to take me to the GeoFront," she answered dumbly.

"Yes, but…do you want me to take you _there_, or to your apartment?" Misato pressed.

"I…was…they said to take me to the GeoFront," Rei insisted. Misato shook her head.

"Do you _want_ to go to the GeoFront?"

"It's irrelevant," Rei answered. Misato felt trapped in that moment, but nodded and pulled back onto the road. The rest of the drive was silent, save for the brief check through security. Misato didn't have to drive far: Ritsuko was waiting at the entrance of the parking garage with a pair of Section 2 men. Misato stopped the car in the middle of the road and exited.

"Two guys for one little girl, Ritz?" she asked, a sudden venom in her voice. Ritsuko gave her an odd look, and opened the door.

"Let's go, Rei," she said, and the girl obeyed. She got out, fell in between the two burly men, and exited the garage. Ritsuko lingered a moment. "Is something wrong, Misato?" she asked.

"You know," Misato said, tensely, "It would be a real friend who puts a bug in someone's phone." Ritsuko's expression did not change.

"That is an absurd thing to say," she replied after a moment, but Misato leaned over the car and glared with such vehemence that Ritsuko had to step back.

"What's going to happen when I get to my office, take my phone apart, and find a bug?"

"Isn't it possible that Section 2 could have done it on the Commander's orders if you _do_ find one?" Ritsuko said, "Or that maybe he's bugging all of us? You're being paranoid, Misato. I'm going to pretend this conversation didn't happen, as a friend. Get your head in order."

"Do not…ever…do that again. Because I _will_ know," Misato snapped. Ritsuko made to ask 'Don't do _what_ again,' but there was no point. There was only so many ways she could bend the truth in one day, and Misato was not normal personnel. She knew things, and she knew people. Ritsuko turned and walked away without another word, and Misato stared after her. As she stared, a truck pulled up behind her car, unable to move past. When it was clear she wasn't going to move, it honked it's horn. One look from her, though, and the truck began to back up and find another entrance.

It was then the phone rang in the cup-holder. She slid into the seat, and answered it with an angry, "What!?"

"C…Captain?" It was Maya Ibuki.

"What do you want?" she hissed.

"We…ma'am, we have an Angel."

* * *

The command bridge was tense as the video imagery played across the big board. The creature was roughly humanoid, with two legs and two arms. No head to speak of, it seemed. The video in question showed it hoisting a British Royal Naval missile cruiser in the air and cut it in half with an almost invisible burst from it's AT Field.

"A British coming in for an allied resupply encountered it as it attempted landfall, and then it retreated back to the water," Ibuki was saying. "No reason why."

"It's behavior since then has been erratic," Hyuga added. "We've been tracking it with sonar and satellite imagery. It went out for two hours, and then it started pacing."

"Pacing?"

"Yeah. Just back and forth, back and forth. Advanced back towards us for about an hour, stopped…and there it is now." He tapped a few keys, and a satellite image came on screen. The satellite was directly over the position of the Angel when the image was captured, and it's great, dark mass could be just perceived beneath the water.

"It destroyed a missile cruiser and two frigates," Ennis mumbled next to her. "Casualty reports are still coming in."

"Has an analysis been run on it yet, based on the attack?" Misato snapped at Aoba. He shook his head.

"It hasn't given us much to go on, besides it's shape and the fact that it deployed an AT Field," he answered. "Still running projections."

"Where are the Pilots?" Misato asked.

"The Fourth Child is in his room gearing up," Cooper answered.

"The Third Child is on his way here, now. The First Child is in lock-down, and the Second Child is…" Ibuki sat up in her chair, pressing her earbud tighter. "Say again?" Misato glanced at the woman, a slow, creeping dread rising in her. Ibuki cleared her throat, and said, "Confirm that." She turned to Misato. "Second Child is…unknown. The school can't find her, and no one has seen her."

Misato didn't lose her temper, just…sank. "Of course," she mumbled. It would be the sort of thing that would happen today. "Well…she's a red-haired white girl running around Tokyo-3 in a school uniform, how hard can she be to find? We only have…is it still stationary?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"We have an hour plus however long it stays there to find her," Misato sighed. "Contact the local police, put out a picture of her and tell them to bring her right here."

"Technically, her identity is classified. The local police wouldn't-" Aoba began.

"Aoba, do it or I will send you out there to find her yourself," Misato snarled. "Get Section 2 involved, if it'll make you feel better, God _damn_ it!" She rubbed her face, and glanced at Ennis. He was studying her patiently. "Sorry," she said. "I've had one of those days."

"We all get them," he said. "Some more than most."

"Sir," Cooper said, glancing over his shoulder. "Dr. Colin is demanding to speak with you."

"As I was saying," Ennis added with a rueful smile. "Cooper, what the hell is he bothering me for now?"

"I have no clue and do not wish to get involved at this time, sir!" Cooper said in a sharp, parade-ground voice. Ennis bared his teeth and marched over to the console. Misato glanced up to see that Fuyutsuki and the Commander were in the midst of a quiet conference between themselves.

"Commander," she said, and both turned to look at her. "Grendel is ready now, Unit-o1 will be ready shortly. If the Angel moves, we'll have at least an hour before landfall. Your instructions?"

* * *

Gendo gazed levelly at the Captain, who stared right back at him. He had overheard the conversation below, and in fact, he and Fuyutsuki had been discussing just that issue. The First Child was…he tasted bile at the thought, and pushed that aside for the moment. Best not to deal with that now.

The Second Child, though…that was odd. Abducted? No, probably not. It was possible, just not probable. Either way, she wasn't here. That left the Third Child and…the American.

"Sir?" Fuyutsuki asked, lending his support to Misato's question.

"Prepare Unit-01," he said, "Grendel will be placed on reserve."

"Maybe we should deploy the American Eva to offer on-field support?" Misato suggested.

"Reserve," he said again, flatly. Misato crossed her arms, looked as though she wanted to say more, but turned towards her staff.

"Grendel on reserve!" she snapped, "Unit-01 will be prepped for launch. Have Third Child suited and in place as soon as he's on site."

* * *

Shinji tasted the copper-blood tang of the LCL, gripped the butterfly controls in limp fingers, and gazed out towards the water. He was alone up here, and it was his fault.

"Where's Asuka?" he had asked as he was hustled through the tunnels.

"The Second Child is missing," the technicians had said. He had asked for Rei, but she was out of communication. He asked about Samson, but he was being kept on standby below ground.

He was it, and it was his fault. It was his fault, because Asuka was missing and he knew why.

_Rei is weak._

_So are you._

If Shinji could hate anything more than himself, he didn't know what it was. Maybe his father…but in that moment…he really hated himself. The hate and the loathing almost overpowered the rising fear that he was alone, up here. Alone and waiting to fight, and probably die at his father's behest.

_Rei is weak._

_So are you._

He didn't know why he had said that, but it was said and it was done. It was done. It was then his comm channel winked. It was a line from Grendel. He answered it. "Samps?" he asked.

"Hey, brother," came the reply. Samps was in his full-rigging, face hidden beneath the encompassing neural helmet. "You ready to do your thing?" Shinji looked down and away, afraid and embarrassed. "Hey, what's that? You're not scared, are you?"

"I'm…alone…" he mumbled. "I don't know if…"

"Yeah, I heard. The Kraut let you down, didn't she?" Shinji bit his lip, tasting blood. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Second Child let you down. She's not here right now, is she? I don't know why, I'm not gonna judge, but I remember telling you…that when the chips were down…"

"It's my fault!" Shinji yelled, feeling tears in his eyes. "I said something…just…it's my fault! It's my fault, okay?"

"Shinji…brother…" Samson said in a gentle voice, "I didn't mean to push a button. You're a good guy to stick up for her. You were a good guy when you jumped in the fire for her back at the volcano. I just wish she'd be here to back your play."

"Where are you?" Shinji said bitterly. He regretted it immediately, knowing he said it defensively. For him, and for Asuka. Samson didn't deserve to be on the end of that venom. To his surprise, and mild relief, Samson chuckled, rolling languidly in his wiring.

"I'm right below you. Give the word, and I'll ride."

"…Thanks," Shinji whispered.

"I said I would back, and I'll back you," Samson said. "Blood and sinew, tooth and bone. We're Pilots, right?" In that moment, Shinji found himself very grateful for Samson.

Another channel blinked. He opened it, and Misato was leaning forward. She was all business in that moment, and her look was intimidating. _Blood and sinew…tooth and bone…_Shinji felt blood rise to his face, and his chest ached. Something burned in him…something much like desire. Ambition.

Rage.

"Shinji? Everything okay up there?" she asked.

"Everything is fine," he said coolly. "Where's the Angel?"

Misato gave him an odd look, and then continued. "It started moving. We have one hour and thirteen minutes before landfall. Uploading the projected coordinates to you. Get ready to move out." Shinji studied the map, and glanced around. Most of the structures of Tokyo-3 were still up, but could be dropped to give him maneuvering room. _Give the word, and I'll ride_.

"No," he said, and Misato scrunched her eyes.

"Shinji, we do _not_ have time for this," she said. "I don't want to hear you com-"

"I have more room to maneuver here," he said, "Just drop the rest of the city. I can take it here, but I need a place to fight." Misato stared at him in silence, not expecting what he had just said. He stared back, and thought he detected something in her eyes. Was it dread? He couldn't tell, because the emotion slipped by before he could hammer it.

"Okay. All right, fine. We'll issue the general alert and drop the city," she said. "Good luck, Pilot." The line blinked off, and he exhaled. The sound of crickets chirping came to him, and he realized the line with Samson had been open the whole time.

"My man," the boy said in wonder, "That was something, Shinji. Truth be told, you have a better tactical advantage at water's edge, but…yeah…that was some sand. Nicely done." Shinji swallowed, looked back up, and, very carefully, smiled.

* * *

Asuka had broken all the bottles she could find, and had decided instead to start pulling plants out by the roots. Her fingers were soon covered in a thick layer of dirt, and the grime pushed up under her fingernails. It hurt, but she didn't stop. She scrabbled at the earth, digging with both hands, just wanting to tear, to rip, to rend. Her thumb caught a rock, and the nail tore, and she ripped both hands back to her. She wound them into her hair, pulling, cutting her scalp with the nails and mingling dirt into her locks. She gritted her teeth so hard she was sure they would break.

_Rei is weak._

_So are you_.

She didn't think she was capable of being hurt as badly as those words had cut her in that moment. She didn't know why they hurt, or why it should be Shinji of all people saying it that caused the most pain. But it was there. She hurt. She ached. She raged. She raged, because in the moment he said it, the way he said it, she knew.

It was true. She was weak. She was weak, weak, weak, filthy weak. She openly sobbed at it, hating Shinji, hating herself, hating it. Hating that he made her feel weak, and hating herself for believing it. It was such a simple phrase, but one with such truth she couldn't ignore it. _So…are…you._

In time, Asuka ceased her bawling. She snuffled, staring at the muddy cuts in her hand, how thoroughly she had ruined her nails. She glanced around, wiping her nose on the back of her hand. "I have no idea where I am," she mumbled to no one in particular. There were trees, and grass, and that was her only point of reference. Standing up, she turned and saw a railing behind her. She was at a park. How she got here, she couldn't say. It had all been a haze of angry, self-loathing and pain on the way over here. She didn't have a watch, didn't even have a phone. It occurred to her that if something happened, no one could contact her. Snuffling, feeling numb, she got to her feet. What if Kaji needed to find her? This was dumb.

Shuffling up to the railing, she followed it downhill until she came to a cut in the trees, and stopped. She heard sirens, and could see Tokyo-3 stretched out before her. The buildings were beginning to drop.

And there stood Shinji.

It was Unit-01, which meant that it was Shinji. Did that mean an Angel was coming? There was a battle coming, and she was here! She should be down there! Asuka got ready to run, but the urge died before she lifted a foot.

She was weak.

Something warred in her chest, the urge to go and the urge to disappear. She felt herself squirm, and she whined in frustration. She didn't know what to do. She didn't know what to do, and she wanted Kaji to tell her.

_You always knew what to do!_ _Why can't you decide now!?_ She took two steps, just up to the edge of a winding path of stairs leading down the hill. She shuffled, she stopped…and she sat down.

Asuka sat and did not move, studying the form of Unit-01 through grimy eyes.


	22. Blood and Sinew

The hour came and the hour went. Shinji spent the time listening to Samson, examining the battle space and attuning himself to it. Samson called it 'setting the ground.' "You have to prepare the killing space," he explained. "You don't lie and wait for the enemy, you make the ground ready for him. Even if it is as simple as deciding where you will stand to face him. Know the ground, and you will know the enemy, for he who controls the earth shall conquer the heavens." At thirty minutes in, after feeling some satisfaction with what he saw, he requested the Pallet Gun.

"Do you want barriers, as well?" Misato asked.

"No," Shinji said. "Not this time."

"That's tactically unsound," Samson warned.

"I don't need them," Shinji insisted.

All that was left was to wait. At times, the remaining half-hour crept like an insect, but at others, it felt too swift. He kicked the couch with the heel of his right foot, felt his teeth chatter from the adrenaline. Soon, soon, softly, softly…

"Angel inbound," Maya said quietly. On cue, the water in the distance began to boil as the bulk of the creature came closer. "Landfall imminent."

"Still on standby," Samson said. Slowly, almost serenely, the fear began to fade. The tremors stopped. He wasn't alone. He nodded to himself, to the rhythm of his heartbeat. He had fought the Angels, and he had won each time. He could win again. He _would_ win again.

He clicked forward, focusing the eyes of the Eva onto the boiling point until it filled the whole of his view. The great, gray bulk of the Angel pierced the surface, water glistening from the hulk. It had no head, giving it the appearance of being hunched. Within the featureless plane between it's shoulders, a mouth appeared, two rows of perfect, almost human teeth. They split, and a single, fat eye pushed between the rows, jerking left, right, then up, taking in the world. He shuddered in disgust at the movements. The teeth, the eye, they looked human. It was revolting.

"I think it sees me," he said, when the eye stopped on him and seemed to focus. It began to stride forward, swinging it's arms. The limbs ended on hands that curved up like meat-hooks. The muscles rippled under the skin, and seemed to expand.

"It's speed is increasing," Misato warned, and sure enough it leaned forward, loping into a sprint that seemed far too fast for its mass.

"You should welcome it," Samson teased. Shinji raised the Pallet Gun and fired a long, steady burst. The earth exploded around the Angel, and the oversized shells shattered against the AT Field. It flattened itself against the ground, and began to scrabble forward.

"Short bursts, brother," Samson warned. "Short bursts." Shinji took his advice, and the rounds connected to the Angels central area with much more regularity. It squirmed right, then left, closing, closing.

"Move, Shinji!" Misato screamed, and he _leaped_.

The Angel burst over the ground, and time seemed to slow. For a moment, it seemed frozen spread-eagle below him. The Pallet Gun bore down on it, and there was no AT Field to halt them. It was a short burst, but a solid one, and the Angel's upper half went squirming one way while the lower half bounced along the ground. Unit-01 landed in a crouch, weapon up and ready.

The Angel moved with amazing speed, pirouetting on a hand and hurling itself against Eva-01. The force of the impact shattered the Pallet Gun, and Shinji's view was filled with the baleful eye.

"Shinji, the other half…it's regenerating!" Misato warned. "It's forming a second core. You have to dispatch this one now, before you're outmaneuvered." As she spoke, the teeth closed around the eye. When they opened again, a great, slavering tongue whipped out, twisted like taffey, and reformed in the shape of a drill. On instinct, Shinji willed one of Eva-01's hands against the 'chin' of the Angel and pushed back. He was stuck, now. He couldn't release either hand to retrieve his Prog Knife without risking the drill, and the Angel was getting _stronger_ if that was possible.

"I'm deploying," Samson announced. Shinji didn't hear him. He was in his own world, now, one that was turning red.

* * *

Asuka hugged her legs. Shinji was doing well for himself, it seemed. Of course he would be. The natural talent…her nose crinkled in a sudden wave of loathing, but of who, she couldn't decide. _I should _be _down there…_

But you aren't.

The earth below her heaved again as Unit-01 rolled over, putting itself on top of the Angel. The disconnected half was squirming and twisting, growing and sprouting a thin, sickly arm. "Hurry up, Baka," she murmured, "Wasting time." There was a wail of warning alarms, and a new hatch opened half a kilometer away from the struggle. With a roar of pneumatic catapults, Grendel appeared, with a suddenness that made it look as if it had materialized from nowhere. Immediately, it twisted and crouched, and then somersaulted in a great leap towards the newly formed Angel. It seemed to detect the new threat, and slithered away just before Grendel's feet slammed down on the spot where it had been. The earth bucked once more, and Asuka had to grab the stair railing to keep from being thrown. Like an ape, Grendel raised both arms above it's head and pounded down where the Angel was, but it was gone again, desperately avoiding battle until it had a form sufficient to fight. It hobbled up on it's legs, a pseudo-torso pushing the one sickly arm up as a squirmed a new shape.

In that moment, Grendel was the center of a small starburst of missiles and high-powered weapon discharges. The new Angel shrieked, trying to squirm away from the storm of shrapnel and heat. Grendel stalked it, deliberate and uncaring, emptying it's weapon bays into the beast at point blank range as it's AT Field struggled to keep integrity. She still despised the graceless gait of the Eva, the lack of art to it, but she couldn't deny the…power. The awful heat of the weaponry could be felt even here, baking the pores of her skin and making her sweat. She wondered if she was too close, if shrapnel or even a whole round could come whipping this direction and turn her into a red, greasy smear. She was rooted to the spot, unable to move, and the fear of that moment lingered with her. It seemed inevitable. That that would be the way that Asuka Langley Soryu ended.

Grendel closed the distance through the storm of smoke it had generated, and grabbed for the Angel. The moment did not come, as Grendel groped for the Angel with both hands, colliding with the AT Field. The whole field, visible now from the friction and heat pressed against it, warped inward, like melting glass. The Angel's arm was now fully grown, and a second one was attempting to burst into existence when the field finally warbled, bucked, and snapped, unable to take the pressure of Grendel's own AT Field and it's raw, physical assault. Both hands snapped forward onto the Angel, driving it to the ground. The last of the Eva's munitions were expelled at point blank range, with a thunder that forced Asuka to grip her head. Even with her hands clamped firmly against her ears, the sound was far too loud, and she screamed from the agony of it. The sound ceased, though its echoes lingered in the girl's skull as she tried to stand, and instead tripped and stumbled down the stairs before coming to a stop, her chin cut and her knees and elbows bloody.

She pushed up on her hands, and turned back towards the battle. Through the smoke, she could see the shape of Grendel pawing at the remains of the Angel, the shadow like a great god pushing up from the soul of the world and ready to be born. Just beyond, Eva-01 had found it's purchase, and had dug its fingers deep into the Angel were it's hands had taken hold.

It began to _peel_, tearing the Angel down the middle with an oily rip. The Eva wailed in triumph, and tossed the pieces in two directions. Both of them were squirming, still fighting. With a loud hiss and burst of steam, the Progressive Knife deployed, and Unit-01 burst after one of the pieces, hunting for the exposed core. Grendel flew from the smoke to pounce on the other piece, punching and kicking. Like Unit-02, Grendel's head was encased in an all-concealing helmet of armor, and the jaws were latched shut. It couldn't bite, but drove it's head deep into the flesh of the Angel, as though it was attempting to.

In that moment, Asuka felt a chill of revulsion. The Evas…did things, generally of their own accord. Being an Eva Pilot, she hated to admit, was less about driving an Eva and more about directing it…being the little Ego that gave the Id it's target, and sat back. It made the Pilot less of a _pilot_, and not so much a handler…merely a compass. She wouldn't admit it to anyone, arguing that it required skill and natural talent. And this was, of course, true. It was also true that an Eva could do whatever it felt like when driven by the Pilot's desires. So when an Eva savaged an Angel like Unit-01 was doing now, it wasn't so much the Pilot, as it was the Eva behaving as the Pilot desired. Grendel, however…

Grendel was slaved to Samson. What she saw was not Grendel, it _was_ Samson. Samson was the one lost in the glee of the slaughter and the blood. She envied him for it, and that disgusted her even more.

A great, sucking sound scrabbled at the air, and Grendel raised a fist with a piece of the new Angel's core twisted into the fingers. The third almost-Angel died, but Grendel continued to pound it, pulverizing the limp and dead flesh with each blow. Unit-01 had pinned the struggling original piece, and was forcing the Progressive Knife down, over and over, cracking the core until finally bursting it. A lake's worth of LCL washed over the ground, staining the knife and the knees of Unit-01. It stood, picking up the Angel, and began to spin, like a discus thrower. It released the corpse, launching it sailing through the air and out towards the ocean. And then it roared.

It twisted into Asuka's brain, a sound of primal glee and gluttony. It was a language she understood better than most, but at the moment, it felt as though the dialect was new. That this was a sound denied to her, and in truth it was. Unit-01 had defeated the Angel, and Grendel had offered support by defeating _two_ clones. They didn't need Unit-02. There wasn't a risk of being replaced, it had _just happened_. She felt a twisting morsel of hate in her stomach, and she stood and began to stumble down the stairs, the blood seeping down her legs to stain her socks.

* * *

The world seemed to lose color for a moment, and the sound of Misato's voice brought Shinji back.

"Good job, Shinji! That was fantastic!" She was unable to keep the glee and excitement out of her voice, and as Shinji turned to survey the remains of the battle, he found it infectious. This had not been a battle, it had been a massacre, and he was the gory victor.

Grendel delivered one last blow to the carcass it held, and finally stood, runty to Unit-01 but no less triumphant. Samson had successfully dispatched the two pieces in record time before they could grow into new Angels, giving Shinji the time to destroy the primary core. There had been a unity to their purpose that Shinji found liberating, powerful. None of the ego and tension that fighting alongside Asuka brought. This had been pure, unsullied.

Samson's channel pinged, and Shinji opened it. "We're left standing," Samson observed.

"Yeah…yeah, we are," Shinji said, in wonder.

"How does it feel, then?"

"What do you mean?"

Samson pointed, and when he did, Grendel's arm followed, encompassing the smoke and haze and mountains of lifeless flesh. "Pure victory. The most natural state a human can be in, having cast his opponent down to the earth. You either kick ass or kiss ass. What was done here, eh?"

"We kicked ass," Shinji said, feeling good. Feeling better than good.

Invincible. He couldn't die. He _wouldn't_ die.

"You did, brother," Samson said, crouching down to grab the remains at his feet and standing to hurl them into the great pillar of smoke where the other piece lay. "You're the rudder. That's what Pilot means, you know? Rudder. Steer what you will, young man." Samson began to giggle, and Shinji didn't know why, but he did, as well. The relief of the end, the exultant speed of it, the joy of…tearing…

Somewhere, inside, he felt sick, but he didn't know why.


	23. Food for Words

Watching Samson eat was a strange and fascinating sight. The boy had ordered five twenty-ounce steaks, all so undercooked as to be raw, and was steadily working his way through each of them. He had already consumed two, and didn't show any signs of slowing. Nor did he chew, seeming to swallow each piece he placed in his mouth whole, with a few cursory nibbles.

"Trigger discipline is essential to dealing with an opponent at range," he was saying. "You want tight shot groups, and that is earned by controlling the recoil. Short, controlled bursts. Don't trust the strength of an Eva or vehicle to keep the recoil in check. Are you gonna eat that?" Shinji blinked, and looked down at his own dinner, an American-style hamburger with French fries.

"Um…no. My stomach's kind of bothering me," he mumbled, smiling sheepishly. He didn't know if it was from Samson's own eating, or if it was something in the fight, but he felt sick. The thought of food made him feel more sick, but Samson had insisted on buying a victory meal. Shinji picked the first thing on the menu without putting much thought into it just to appease him.

"Shouldn't have ordered it. It'll go to waste," Samson said, speaking as he swallowed. Shinji wondered if he should say something, lest the other boy end up choking. "Still, fire discipline aside, well done. I thought you'd be a good Pilot to back, and I was right. My instincts never fail on these things."

"Thanks," Shinji mumbled, and in truth, he was grateful. It wasn't the first time he had gone into combat knowing he would win. The last active battle he had had with Asuka had, to a certain point, carried the predicted, confident stride of inevitable victory. So long as they played the game. This time, though, the dynamic had been different. Victory was not assured…but he knew he would win.

He piddled at his fries. Did he truly know he would succeed? On reflection, it occurred to him that he honestly had no clue whether he would win or lose. In fact, he was very certain he was going to die. Then what was the difference? Samson continued to pontificate on strategy and sound battle tactics as Shinji tuned him out, focusing on his emotions in that fight. It occurred to him that he had actually thought he would die when the battle started. Thought it…and didn't care. Or, more appropriately, cared about something more.

Fighting.

It was as if the fear of the consequences had been submerged if not eliminated, for the greater joy of destruction. Was this what Asuka felt when she fought? It was an odd sensation. He always Piloted an Eva because someone had told him to. Misato. His father. Everyone. Today though…he had Piloted for himself. He had fought not because he had to.

Because he wanted to. And he enjoyed it. The adrenaline. The speed. The thunder of the Pallet Gun, the rush of the charge, the tearing…the tearing…the stabbing…

The nausea returned. He realized that Samson had stopped talking, and he glimpsed up. The other boy's expression was flat. "You look green in the gills, brother," Samson said.

"Just…I think I've got a bug, or something. My stomach is…" Shinji mumbled, then trailed off. Samson smiled, and it made Shinji feel small.

"You've got something, you have," Samson said, starting his fourth steak.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's fun, isn't it?" Samson said cutting a large piece. "Just diving right in, running on instinct. Every human has this piece of the bush in them, you see? That little piece left over from our monkey days, or whatever. That animal side, right before we figured out how to smash the big cats with rocks and take down our prey with sharp sticks. When all it was was fists and teeth and hate." Shinji was mesmerized by the way Samson was cutting the steak, each slice almost surgical. Something about the way Samson cut and ate reminded Shinji of a lizard.

"That little monkey part of our brain is a bloody one, brother. Full of bad thoughts and bad drives, you know. That darkness is a friend when you let it out at the right times, you know. It's that little animal part of your brain that tells you when to run and when to fight. When it tells you to fight…it tells you to win. You don't…_never_…want to take that drive away." Shinji nodded cautiously, and carefully. In the past conversation, Samson had changed his manner of speaking at least three times. Always lazy and confident, but the grammar choices, the syntax, even the accent…it seemed to drift back and forth. At times, it was hard to follow.

The words held a special ring for Shinji, though. There was an undeniable truth to them, a resonance that seemed to ring inside the hollow parts of his brain and echo back from the soul. "When it tells you to fight…it tells you to win…" Shinji mumbled.

Samson slurped down the last bite, a dribble of red grease on his chin. He ignored it, and continued into the remaining steak. He consumed it with vigor as Shinji felt his gaze be pulled outside, to the people of Tokyo-3 as they went about their daily lives, in the shadow of extinction. What differentiated the human part of the brain from the animal part? Was reason and logic as truly monumental as they seemed to be, or simply different words and drives for instinct? Were they simply slaves to emotions, as all things were?

Were these emotions he was troubled with so often…he felt his head drop. Was emotion what made man an animal? If that was the case, was it the thing that saved him or the thing that damned him? He glanced up at Samson reveling in the last barely-cooked steak. He seemed more of a beast in this one moment, but it was undeniable that he had power over his environment. He moved when he felt like moving, fought because he loved it, and won because he was good. Was he a slave to emotion, or master of it? The other boy began snapping his finger, calling over a cute, young waitress. Her expression at being called in that manner was disgusted, but as she got closer to Samson, the face became one of wooden politeness. Samson produced a card and handed it to her. He smiled, but the eyes were cold.

"My check, please," he said. It took her a moment to reach out and take the card, as though it was a snake waiting to bite. Shinji could detect waves of unease radiating from her, such that she didn't even notice he was sitting there. He glanced at Samson, who continued to study the girl in a way that concerned Shinji…not because it was a threatening gaze, but because he himself didn't feel threatened by it. Was he truly that bad at reading people, or had he just become so benumbed to Samson that this stuff didn't register with him?

Maybe this is how you want to be, a part of his mind accused him, in a voice that sounded like Misato's. He felt his cheeks flush. Sometimes, he wanted people to just _stop_…stop being, stop existing, stop, stop, stop. Did he want those people to hate him? Fear him?

As the girl returned the check, three men had followed her to the table. She glanced up at them, and visibly trembling, made a quick exit to the bar where she could find safety in numbers. The men were Americans, and while their clothing was civilian, their haircuts were not. Samson lounged back, watching them in snide amusement. "Captain," the tallest of the three said in English. Shinji listened quietly to the rest of the conversation, understanding it but not all of the metaphors.

"Come to fetch me back before midnight?" Samson asked, cocking an eyebrow. "That's good, you know. I might turn into a pumpkin. Then where would you be at?"

"We're simply to provide an escort for the remainder of your evening," came the reply. "You know you're a strategic asset."

"I have to be chaperoned, you see," Samson said to Shinji, switching abruptly to Japanese. "They don't want their Pilot wandering off and getting run over, or something. Take me home, boys."

"Sir?"

"You found me because I paid the bill with my stipend card. I knew you guys would find me that way, and I'm tired. Take me home and my friend here back to his apartment." The three men glanced at each other, uncertain of what to do. Samson drove their decision by standing up and walking towards the door. "You only brought one vehicle, right? You two will ride with me on the tram. You, the lazy-eyed bastard, you drive Mr. Ikari home. Have a good one, Shinji. Enjoyed the talk." Samson waved lazily as he exited. Two of the mooks hustled to catch up, falling in on either side and tossing a set of keys to the one who remained. He glanced at Shinji, but said nothing.

Shinji watched as the other boy and his escort left. He glanced up at the soldier who remained.

"Where to?" the man asked. That was a good question, Shinji thought.

* * *

"Keep me informed," Kaji said on the phone. "The minute you find her, understand?"

"We will," Misato said. "Did you get…whatever you needed sorted out?"

"No, I didn't," he grated. "But I'm closer. I'll tell you about it over drinks." There was a silence on the other end. The words were flirtatious, but the tone was not.

"We _will_ find her," Misato said. Kaji stepped out of his car and glanced up at his apartment building. He would be in, change his clothes, grab an energy drink, and hit the bricks again. No sleep until Asuka had been found.

"I know," he mumbled. "I'm…just tired."

"I'll say," Misato replied. "Keep this up and I might think you actually care for the kid." Kaji rolled his eyes. He generally made no fuss at all about Asuka, and there was a reason for that. A man was not stone, though, and you hammer him enough, he would bleed. There had been a lot to process in the last few weeks.

"And what about you're charge, Mommy Misato?" he asked, entering the lobby.

"Found at a restaurant, with Samson, by American MPs," she said, less than enthusiastic. Shinji had disappeared almost immediately after the battle, having taken the time to change out of his Plug suit and that was it. Misato suspected he had an idea where Asuka was, or why she had disappeared, but she hadn't the time to interrogate him on it. When contacted by the Americans and asked where she wanted him deposited, she said send him home. "Can I ground him? That is in my rights, right?"

"Damned if I know," Kaji mumbled, stepping onto the elevator. "I'll call you in five."

"Right," she said, and hung up. He tapped the button for his floor, and rode up in silence. He had been trying to peel the minds of his contacts in intelligence for more about the Americans, and the only thing they could provide were items on the delegation. As for Samson, _nothing_! The Grendel Eva, _nothing_! A spy with no information was something like a fish with no fins, waiting for bigger fish to come and gobble him down. What Kaji needed was information, and he was dying from lack of it.

The elevator door opened, and he made his way down the hallway, turning the corner, and slowing to a stop as he made out the huddled shape pressed against his door. Even with her head down and huddled into her knees, the shock of red hair told him it was Asuka. He waited for a moment, taking it in. Her shirt was dirty, the nails of the hand he could see were broken, bloody, and caked with mud. Her knees were cut and scabbed. She looked very much like a house cat that had learned the outside world was not so much fun, and that it was time to come home.

He nodded, and said, "There was an attack today, you know." She looked up at him, and snuffled. They held each other's gaze for a moment more. "What happened?"

"I fell."

"I noticed," Kaji agreed. There was something that changed in the gaze, and Kaji felt a distinct heat in his neck. He felt truly uncomfortable in that moment.

"I need to clean up," she said. "Can I use your bathroom?" He smiled, good-natured and relaxed. It was his defense mechanism against trouble.

"Let's take you home," Kaji offered.

"I'm all muddy and covered in blood," Asuka insisted. "I can't go home like this."

"It would be better if you did," he said patiently. "Misato is worried about you." She grimaced, and shook her head.

"I…I don't need to go back there," she said. "They don't…have…they're all…" Asuka trailed off into mumbling.

"Want to try that again?" Kaji ventured. Asuka couldn't look at him for a moment, glancing away nervously. Uncurling from her position, she leaned over and gave him a very adult look.

"Pleeeeease can I come in?" she asked with a hint of a whine.

"Stop that!" The words were sharp, and Asuka flinched as if cold water had splashed her face. "Get off the floor and come here," Kaji continued, his words barely concealing disgust and anger. Looking hurt and ashamed, Asuka picked herself up and very slowly crossed the hall to him. Kaji leaned over, enough to remind her of how much taller he was, not enough to break the height difference. He stuck a finger in her face and said, "You will never…_never_…do that to me again. Is that clear?"

"Ye…ye…yes, sir," she whispered, staring at his shoes. He straightened, and made a vague gesture towards the elevator.

"I'm taking you back to Misato's apartment," he said. "Walk." She began to weave down the hallway, unsteady but in the general direction he wanted. He pulled out his phone and realized his hand was trembling. He gave it a moment to relax, and texted Misato.

ASUKA FND, CALL OFF SRCH. WILL B AT YR PLC

He sent the message, and followed the girl.

* * *

The drive back was in silence, as Kaji probed his own fury and disgust. Up until this point, he generally treated Asuka's affections and clingy attention as mild or childish. As such, he ignored them. When they mounted in aggression, he continued to ignore them, deflecting their energies elsewhere or just waiting until Asuka got distracted by something else, as she often did. What had happened just now, though, had rocked him to his core. There was nothing innocent about what had happened, and it had angered him immensely.

Even more so was that it was clear Asuka had an _idea_ of what she was trying to do, but no real _concept._ He didn't know where she had gotten the notion to behave like _that_, but it was clear she had never actually done it before: it was too uneven, too ragged, too held back. Which meant that if she was attempting it _now…_

He glanced at her. Her head was down, and her hair was over her face. There were too many things to sort out with this, beyond the fact that she had finally crossed the line, and he had probably not handled it in the best manner. Regardless, he was not about to apologize. Then she would think that what she had done _was_ in fact okay, and he wasn't going to give her that possible assumption.

They pulled into the parking lot at Misato's complex, and he got out and opened the door for her. Slowly, she exited the vehicle. She had been crying, but Kaji made no mention of it. They both walked up to the apartment, and Kaji knocked on the door. There was a moment when he was unsure anyone would answer, and then the door opened and Shinji stood there with his headphones on his neck and the S-DAT player in hand. His eyes widened in shock as he took in Asuka, still in a state of general pitifulness. She looked at him, a moment of shock and misery crossing her face. As quickly as it had been there, the expression vanished, and turned into one of defiant rage. She pushed past him, driving him back with her hand, to go stomping into the apartment without taking off her shoes. Shinji watched her go, and then turned back and looked at Kaji helplessly.

"She's your problem now," Kaji said, his features again in that mask of the relaxed grin. "Call if she's too much to handle." He turned to leave and was about ten steps away when he heard Shinji call after him. He turned and regarded the boy.

Shinji, for his part, had been aghast at the sight of Asuka. Her hair was messy, her clothes were torn and filthy, she was covered in _blood_…and for a moment, he saw her as truly hurt, and truly…weak. And it didn't disgust him, it terrified him. Before he could latch onto it, the moment had passed, and Asuka gave him a chilling look, and bowled past him. It was a lot to process, and he didn't want Kaji to leave without confessing.

"It's my fault," he said, as the man regarded him. Something about Kaji had always set him at ease, despite the few brief encounters between the two. He had an air of acceptability around him…as though regardless of who Shinji was or what he did, Kaji would still be Kaji, and Shinji would be okay by him. He swallowed, afraid he might be saying the one thing Kaji would not understand.

"What's your fault?" Kaji asked.

"I…called her weak," Shinji said. "She said something cruel about Rei, so I…I said Asuka was weak. I told it to her face." Kaji pondered this, rocking on his heels.

"That's a big deal," he admitted. "A big deal. She wouldn't take that lightly, but interesting this is how she behaves when _you_ say it…"

"What does that mean?" Shinji asked carefully.

"It's not enough," Kaji continued, bypassing the question, "To say you're sorry. And you _are_ sorry, right?"

Shinji would have normally tittered around the question. 'I guess so.' 'Maybe.' 'Kind of.' There was no hesitation when he firmly answered, "Yes."

"Good. Now, Shinji," Kaji turned towards him and held his hand up as if he was gripping a sphere. "With women, simply _saying_ you're sorry is pointless. That's words, words mean _nothing_. You have to _show_ them you're sorry. Actions always mean a lot more to a woman then words."

"Show her…I'm sorry? How am I supposed to do that?" he asked, helplessly.

"You have to figure that out," Kaji said. "I don't know what it is she likes you to do. There is something you do that means something to her, so you'll have to figure out what that is. I'll leave you to it." He waved, spun on his heel, and vanished, leaving Shinji in the doorway as the S-DAT player finished the song and began to rewind.


	24. O Wee Lamb

The room was cold, and Rei did not stir. Her skin prickled in protest at the temperature, but the girl gave no other indication of her discomfort. She _was_ uncomfortable, but she did not show it. What point and purpose was there in protesting? It seemed an odd thing to do.

The room was cold. That was that.

She shivered, standing in the center of the dark room as Dr. Akagi scribbled on a clipboard, her breathing too noisy to Rei. The girl watched her with a detached expression, the tiled floor seeming to sap the warmth from her blood through the soles of her bare feet. She waited, and waited. As the time drew on, a small thought nagged at the corner's of Rei's mind, scratching like a mouse in the walls.

"There was a battle today," she breathed.

"Yes, Rei, there was," Dr. Akagi said, without looking up.

"Was Shinji involved?"

"The Third and Fourth Children were both involved," Dr. Akagi replied, capping her pen and looking up at Rei. _The Fourth Child_…Rei dropped her eyes to Dr. Akagi's stomach, her torso wrapped in a turtleneck. It looked warm. "You had an incident today, Rei. Care to talk about it?"

"An incident?" Rei asked. Dr. Akagi cocked her head, and Rei gazed back. It sounded, she supposed, like she was trying to dodge the question. She wasn't. She just didn't know if that word applied to what happened today. Upon reflection, 'incident' might be an accurate description. "I suppose it could be called that," she conceded.

"You suppose?"

"I do not know what happened today," Rei explained. "I barely remember any of it."

"What do you remember?" Rei closed her eyes.

"I was remembering a dream."

"A dream?"

"About a doll."

"Describe the doll."

"I…cannot remember. I don't think it was relevant how it appeared, as much as it was about a doll." With her eyes closed, Rei could smell the thick perfume of Dr. Akagi. Something about the scent spoke of womanhood, of an end to childhood. It seemed to emphasize that Rei was a child. She was less than formed, or still forming. Dr. Akagi was what she would become, once this part of her life was done. The emotion that it brought was odd. She felt…inadequate. Strangely small.

Why should the smell of perfume make her feel so small?

"What else do you remember?"

"I was wondering what it was like to have a doll."

"Are you wanting a doll now?" Rei opened her eyes and glared at Dr. Akagi.

"No," she said, somewhat peevish. The woman looked back with a blank face, but her eyes betrayed wonder. Surprise. Rei felt some of that surprise herself. _So willful_, something old seemed to chuckle inside of her, _What has encouraged such impatience in you? Are you not supposed to do as the Commander has told you? For shame, for shame!_ "I was wondering…if I had had a doll when I was…" Her eyes glazed. "I cannot remember."

"Can't remember what?"

"It's…it doesn't matter, now."

Dr. Akagi nodded, and began to circle the girl. Rei could feel the warmth from the woman emanate through the air, the only source of heat in the room. It kissed at Rei's skin, and reminded her of how cold she was. Her discomfort rose, and her shivering became more severe. "Are you cold, Rei?"

"…yes."

"I see." There was no offer to raise the temperature, or allow her an article of clothing. It was merely an observation, and acceptance of the state of affairs. "What else do you remember?"

Rei pondered that question. She remembered the girls of the class teasing Asuka about a supposed crush on the Fourth Child, and her disdain at that. She remembered the feeling of emptiness that seemed to beckon her, swallowing and digesting like a great fish. She remembered looking up and seeing Shinji there, her face slimy with tears. She remembered that Shinji was there, and his eyes were concerned. It was a wasted emotion, that concern, for there were all replaceable in the end. She knew that, knew it well, and despite that…

As Dr. Akagi circled her, she glanced at the woman from the corner of her eye. The woman was taller than her, and something about…it was the fact that she wore clothing, and Rei wore none. This was not an uncommon state of affairs in her medical examinations, but something about today made her feel exposed. Small. Naked. It was a feeling she did not like, and as she tried to subdue and dissuade it, it rose in defiance of her. Her shivering turned to trembling, and she looked down, feeling the need to hide her face.

She remembered that Shinji was there.

"I want to talk to Shinji," she murmured.

"I'm sorry?" Dr. Akagi asked.

"I…want to talk to Shinji," Rei mumbled a little louder, feeling her voice crack. Dr. Akagi stopped pacing, and Rei risked a glance. The woman stood with open surprise on her face, not bothering to conceal it.

"I don't think that's possible right now," she answered.

"Please let me talk to him," Rei pleaded. Dr. Akagi glanced over her shoulder into the dark, back at Rei, and then walked away, vanishing into the shadows that surrounded them. Rei felt that prickle of moisture and salt as the tears worked their way out again.

_This is a new side of you, Rei,_ that Old Thing sighed to her, _Or is it the old side? Is this the you that was there all along? How long can you suppress the Human Thing before the seals begin to crack and the whole of you bubbles to the surface? Even you forgot you feel, didn't you? How is it?_ Terrifying, she cried back. I'm terrified, and I have no ground to stand on.

"Please let me talk to Shinji," she called a little louder, insistent. There was no reply.

* * *

Gendo Ikari propped an elbow on one hand and hid his mouth behind the other. Light was reflected off of his glasses, rendering his eyes unreadable. Inscrutable. The smell of Ritsuko's perfume filled the room, but he did not turn from the glass panel.

"This is new," Ritsuko said, with something very much like humor in her voice. Gendo did not reply, still trying to sort the pieces of the interview as he studied the girl from behind the glass. To his consternation, she had begun _crying_ again. He wouldn't have believed it, honestly, if he hadn't seen it for himself. He cleared his throat, the only sound of irritation he intended to allow for himself. "I don't feel comfortable releasing her yet."

"I want her separated from the Third Child," he said.

"We can _try_ that," Ritsuko said. There was dissent in the voice. Gendo turned, his brow furrowed. He studied Ritsuko as she took a place next to him, her hands folded over her clipboard and her eyes on the girl.

"You disagree," he said flatly.

"If she's like this _now_, how will she be after a week, or a month of separation from him? Probably useless," Ritsuko said. "In the end, the call is yours, Commander, but I'm frankly curious to see where this newfound talent for bursting into tears came from." Gendo slowly turned back to the girl, who still stood rigidly with her hands at her sides. The tears on her face were now dropping to the floor. He felt his irritation rising, and decided it was, in the end, the Americans fault. He had considered many variables, but the presence of that _boy_ had sullied things somehow. It was completely illogical and primarily emotional, but he had fixated on the theory that one was the cause of the other. Somehow, in some way, Rei in there crying like a babe in the tall grass was connected to Samson Creed. He couldn't assemble all of the details within that theory into something whole and solid, but his instincts had never failed him before.

"We _could_," Ritsuko ventured, "Simply hatch a new one. We have the last pattern from before this began. We could pattern a new one from the tank and shutter this one. It wouldn't have the complications that have developed. It would be more…neat." Gendo cocked an eyebrow. There was truth in that. Being aware of the complications that Rei had developed _now_ as a result of whatever…pressure the Americans had introduced on Nerv might allow him to maneuver her more effectively. Having the advantage of hindsight with a clean template. He rubbed his eyes, his glasses perching up on his fingertips. It was a possibility…

"No," he decided. Chaos was something he could still work with. When he tried to control events too tightly, they risk spinning further out of his ability to maneuver them. He didn't like risking an erratic Rei when so much of his plan rested on controlling her, but in a way, he felt starting from scratch would be like…cheating. "No, we'll simply accept this as is and move on. It's easier to observe her and adjust than reload every time things don't go our way."

"If that's what you want," Ritsuko said, touching his elbow. He didn't respond, still staring at Rei. He went inside, analyzing his decision. Was it arrogance that made him accept that decision? Or was it sentimentality? Had he become too attached to behave rationally? He studied Rei, who seemed to have cried herself out and stood snuffling and ashamed.

It could be Yui in there…

He tasted bile in his throat, and scratched his nose. The action seemed gentle, but the burning sensation and moisture on his thumb told him he had cut himself. Arrogance, or sentimentality…both were dangerous things to have at this juncture.

For the life of him, he couldn't tell which it was.


	25. Apologetics

It had been a long time since Asuka had actually lay down in her own bed. She had spent night after night curled up on Shinji's bed, drifting to sleep with his warmth against her back. The futon in her own room felt sterile and unused, warm as snow. There was no smell to it, no flavor. It reminded her of hospital sheets, and she hated hospitals.

She had peeled off her school uniform and crumpled it on the floor, and crawled under the sheets as so. There was still mud and blood caked on her skin, and her skin crawled as the grime collected against her pores and clumped against the sheets. She watned to go to sleep and not wake up, but more than that, she wanted to do…something to Shinji. What that was specifically, she couldn't decide. All she knew was that she was angry and wanted to do something about it, and Shinji had to pay. She had been scared at the idea of facing him after he had cut her so badly, cut her deep, but as soon as she saw him on the other side of the door, she…

The haughty side had taken over. The pride had shielded her. To hell with him.

To hell with him and all of them.

And yet…

She was not one to admit her failings. She didn't like acknowledging her own weaknesses, and having someone else acknowledge them, even so casually, was hard to take. Especially when she…well…what did she do? Admire Shinji? No…_no_…why should she? He was a whiner, a sniveling boy who crawled where others ran. He held himself back. Held everyone back.

_Except when saving you_.

"Shut up," she grumbled, digging her head under her blanket. Her pillow was in Shinji's room, and she had nothing to rest her head against. She clamped her hands down onto her ears, as though this would silence the voice in her head. _He has saved you more times than you have saved him. He is right…you are weak._ "ShutupIhateyou," she gritted in a single, slurred breath. She rolled over onto her stomach, and realized she had no grounding. No basis on which to accurately view the situation. There was just something about…_Shinji_…that made it difficult for her to consider things from anything resembling a rational perspective. She closed her eyes, trying to will herself to sleep.

It was then she smelled food.

Her nose twitched, and her stomach grumbled. She propped herself up on the bed, and stared at the door. It wasn't a light smell, either, but a strong smell of things cooked and cooking. The smell had been building to a crescendo, and just now had she realized it had been lingering at the corner of her mind before breaking through to her conscious thoughts. She squirmed on the futon, not wanting to go outside…but becoming _hungry_. She hadn't eaten all day, and it smelled very good, and say what you would about Shinji (she had _plenty_ to say, at that), he was a fantastic cook.

When she swallowed her drool for the third time, she finally surrendered and grabbed some shorts and a shirt off of the floor. Slipping into them, she carefully slid open her door and tiptoed into the hallway. She studied Shinji's door across from her own for a moment, before banishing strange thoughts from her mind, and edged into the living room. She turned the corner, and beheld the dining room table laden with food. There was no room left at the table for utensils, much less plates or places to eat. Her mouth dropped open, and she peered over the pile into the kitchen proper.

Like a mad scientist in the lab, Shinji was scrambling from one pot to the next, to the counter to chop vegetables, to the fridge and pantry for ingredients. There was a wild air to his cooking, as though he was a train drifting off of the tracks. She shook her head in amazement, and couldn't help but blurt out, "What the _hell_!?" Shinji whirled around, his face covered with sweat from the oven and his hair mussed. His apron, clothes, and face were spattered with food. He stared at Asuka, and she stared back.

"I've cooked all the food in the house!" Shinji declared, his voice somewhere on the edge of hysteria. "There's nothing left to cook!"

"What…what is all this?" Asuka gasped.

"I'm apologizing!" Shinji explained. "This is an apology dinner. I can't apologize anymore, there's no more food!" Asuka's mouth worked without sound for a moment, and then she began laughing. Long, hard, and free. Shinji stared at her, trying to gauge what that meant. "Is…what does that mean? Is it apology accepted?"

"B…b…Baka!" she snorted. "No, it doesn't!" She leaned against the door frame, hugging her sides and unable to stop.

"Then why are you laughing? What am I—" Shinji began to babble.

"Wait!" she said, managing to contain herself. Asuka looked at Shinji, standing there maniacally with his apron, his mussed hair, and the food on his cheeks. It took all of her strength to keep from bursting into laughter again. "Oh, God!" she giggled. Snuffling, Asuka shook her head and tried to explain. "I'm not going to forgive you yet, you idiot. But I'm not mad at you anymore."

"But…_but_…" Shinji stammered. "I…" He leaned against the counter, his hands falling weakly to his side. He slid to the floor as his pots boiled over. Asuka felt her giggles slowly fade, and for a time, they simply sat there, the table between them and Shinji's pots over-boiling. Eventually, Asuka worked up the nerve to finally ask him, straight out, the question that was nagging her, tormenting her.

She flicked her eyes to him. "Am I really weak?"

"No, Asuka," he mumbled, "I just said that because I was mad. I don't like it when you put Rei down. She…she doesn't deserve that." Asuka bounced on her feet, considering that. Somehow, Samson entered her thoughts, and it occurred to her the best thing for the Pilots to do was close rank on the boy. Keep him isolated. They couldn't do that at each others throats, and Rei…Asuka knew that she had said that about Rei, because it could have easily been her breaking down. That made her irritated, but it also made her sympathetic, which was somehow _more _irritating. She shook the thought from her mind, and looked at the food.

"We need to eat some of this," she said.

"That was the plan," Shinji said in a peevish tone. She smiled. Somehow, she knew it wasn't directed at her.

"I'm going to go shower, and when I'm done, we can dig in and save what we don't finish," she declared. She turned to grab a change of clothes, and then paused, turning back to look at Shinji. He was studying his knees pulled up in front of him.

"I'm strong, right?" she asked with a devilish smile.

"Yeah," he answered.

"Strong than you?" She tilted her head back to look down her nose at him.

"Of course," he said.

"What about Samson, am I stronger than Samson?" Shinji looked up from his knees, and fixed her with an intent gaze that made her flinch.

"I don't know," he admitted, "I really don't know." Asuka was surprised to realize she wasn't offended by that. That didn't change the fact that she _did_ feel greatly disturbed.

* * *

Kaji rotated the glass in has hand careful, watching the ice nudge against the side as it spun. Misato stirred her own drink with a fingertip in a lazy, detached manner. She watched as the bubbles migrated from the bottom of the glass to the surface, directed by the small eddies she created.

"Normally, I just ignore it. She's a kid, kids have crushes, right?" he said, then sipped at his bourbon. "I just…maybe I shouldn't have gotten mad, I don't know." It was odd to see Kaji this rattled, especially over someone of the opposite gender flinging herself at him. That being said…Asuka _was_ a child. Part of Misato's mind, the part that flung her sexuality in the faces of the people she knew for…_whatever_ the reason, she wasn't entirely sure herself, saw this as an overreaction on Kaji's part.

Asuka, however, remained a child. And this clearly had shaken him, though he wasn't blubbering about it over the bar or anything. His tone had drifted into something morose, and his smile seemed sad. She licked her finger and felt her tongue go numb from the alcohol evaporating off of it.

This was a new side of Kaji.

"This was more…wanton, I take it?"

"Good word," he mumbled, though the tone was lighter. "I never suspected it would go to…that. It made me feel very angry. Very…um…" He furrowed his brow. "I can't even think of the word."

"Sort of like a shiver of the soul?" Misato offered, sipping her own drink.

"Sort of," Kaji agreed. "I'm wondering if somewhere in this it was my fault."

"Did you invite it?" Misato asked.

"Of course not."

"And you didn't accept it, did you?"

"No."

"Then it's not your fault, and you did what you were supposed to do," Misato said. She shook her head. For a long time, she assumed men operated on a very linear plane of thinking, and that women occupied a _very specific_ plane of that attention. Now, she found herself adrift. Kaji had surprised her in more ways than one. And, thought it might have been the alcohol talking…it impressed her.

"So she's back at the apartment, and it's Shinji's problem now," he said, and Misato laughed.

"God, maybe I _won't_ ground him after all," she giggled. Kaji smirked.

"You, grounding someone. Perish the thought."

"I know. How'd we end up in this situation, huh?" Misato asked, and then felt her throat constrict. That question, she realized, had many different byways and implications. She swallowed, and glanced nervously at Kaji. As she assumed, he was pondering each and every one. Finally, he shrugged.

"Life is messy, and that's all there is to it," he said, clearly not wanting to think too much harder tonight.

"I'll drink to that," Misato said, and clinked his glass. As one, they down their drinks, and placed the glasses on the table.

"I'll cover the tab," Kaji said. Misato nodded, stood, and kissed him on the ear. He turned on his stool and stared at her with surprise.

"You're a good man when you try to be," she said, and winked at him. She left him at the bar, having given him a surprise of his own for the evening.

* * *

"Now, Andrew Scott," Dr. Colin stated, waggling a finger, "_There_ was a piece of work. They found his body in Vietnam with a necklace of ears."

"I thought the ears thing was a myth," his assistant said in wonder, adjusting Samson on the bed. The boy was unconscious and face-down, his torso exposed.

"Come now, Miles…all myths have an…element of truth," Colin said distractedly as he inserted a syringe into Samson's arm and drew a large vial of blood. "Scott, he was a lunatic. A dyed, in-the-wool blood drinker. There's an advantage to people like that, Miles. Make no mistake about it, you want the lunatics."

"For the…jobs normal people couldn't do?" Miles asked.

"Of course. You get a sane person to do half the stuff we need, and they always try to justify it. They need a reason, they need to fit it all into their worldview." Colin sounded disdainful as he continued speaking, finishing the draw and wiping the place the needle had been. "It makes them brittle devices. But a lunatic? They'll do it for the pleasure. You don't need to give them a reason, just point, release, and retrieve." He finished, and smiled, patting the boy on the back. He then held up the syringe, as though it was a holy object.

"Do you know what any nation in the world would pay for this?" he whispered. Miles looked up at the syringe, then at Colin, inviting further explanation. "Not enough," Colin snickered. "If it was just the United States dealing with that discrepancy, we'd be thrown in Leavenworth for treason if not blown up in our apartment or garroted in the night. Our more _immediate_ employers would skin us, drop us in oil barrels, and bury us alive in the Mojave." Miles cleared his throat in discomfort. Colin smiled wider.

"So…um…why talk about Sgt. Scott?" Miles asked, hoping to redirect the conversation.

"No reason, Miles," Colin answered, placing the syringe in a special device to drain and siphon it into smaller samples. "Just a memory of the old days, I guess. And a reminder that sometimes we need a lunatic to do things we ourselves can't."

Miles shifted on his feet, pointed at Samson, and murmured, "And…this is our…lunatic?"

"Sort of. Not yet. Maybe never, but he'll do in a pinch. There may come a time when we need to _motivate_ him, so be ready for that," Colin said.

"And what happens when he's…motivated?"

Colin smiled, but didn't answer.


	26. Of Fashion and Child Rearing

When Misato unlocked her door and entered the apartment, she smelled many good things that almost made her forget how irritated she was.

Almost.

She shucked her shoes in the entry hall and walked into the apartment. Her only response to the feast on the table was a raised eyebrow. Asuka and Shinji were both hunched over the food and frozen in mid-bite, their eyes locked on Misato. She gestured to the food.

"Baka Shinji," Asuka said, as though that would explain everything.

"Of course," Misato murmured, dropping her purse on a chair and walking to the fridge. She opened it, then straightened slowly. She studied Shinji.

"The cabinets are…we need to go to the store," he said.

"Of course," Misato repeated. She grabbed a six-pack and walked to the table.

"You're not going to drink _all_ of that, are you?" Asuka asked before thinking, purely on her emotional reflex.

"It's been a six-pack day!" Misato snapped loudly, a little more mean than she meant. Asuka's mouth snapped close, her eyes widened, and Misato could _swear_ that her hair fuzzed like a cat bristling it's fur. Shinji himself seemed to be slowly sinking into his chair, as though he was melting from the bottom down. Misato gave him a glare, too, and he froze in place. Misato popped a beer, drained it in one sitting, popped a second one, drained _that_…then popped a third and waited. "Where's my plate?"

"It's…there's…I can…" Shinji began stammering, and he scurried over to the cabinets for a fresh plate. Asuka herself sat immobile. She had detected a dangerous line somewhere, and she felt that by sitting very still, that line would recede. It was not in her to back away from a fight, and she rarely found herself feeling intimidated by Misato.

Then again, Misato rarely allowed herself to be intimidating. When she wanted to…she could be. And Asuka was intimidated. Shinji brushed past her and laid a plate, chopsticks, fork, spoon, and three different kinds of napkins down in front of Misato. She crossed her arms and stared at her place, until Shinji began arranging the utensils and napkins around the plate into something looking like a set place. "Hot sauce? Curry? Anything?" she asked, her arms still crossed. There was more scurrying, more items plopped on the table. She regarded them, then began spooning food onto her plate. Slowly, Shinji drifted back to his place.

For a few minutes, Misato ate in silence. As she did, Asuka, who sat closest to her, began to find her own appetite dissipated as her eyes and sinuses began to burn from the amount of spicy condiments that Misato was slathering her food with. Shinji stirred his food, no longer feeling especially hungry himself. In time, the heat from Misato's food began to burn his eyes, and he glanced at Asuka. She turned towards him, her eyes red and weepy and her forehead spotted with sweat. She gave him a pointed look. _Well…say something_.

Shinji's mouth dropped, and he glanced at Asuka. _Me_?

Asuka's nostrils flared, and her eyes began burning for another reason. _It's not going to be _me_, YOU say something_.

In response, Shinji's mouth began working without sound, and then his brow furrowed in stubbornness. _She's mad at YOU! YOU say something!_

The chopsticks in Asuka's hand rotated, and she held them like a knife. _Shinji, I swear to _GOD!

"So how was your day, Misato?" Shinji asked, still glaring at Asuka.

"Oh, it was fine," she said, "Had an Angel attack, dealt with damage reports, lost two Pilots…you know, normal stuff."

"…so, how was the Angel attack?" Asuka asked, choosing what she thought was the safest topic.

"It was quite the sight! You should have been there? Where were you, by the way?" Misato asked. Asuka looked down at her food. Shinji

"Don't worry, though, I have a solution!" Misato declared, opening her purse.

"Cell phones?" Asuka asked, somewhat brightly.

"O-o-o-h-h-ho-ho-ho, no," Misato drolled. "That would be too much like a gift. No, no. I got you these!" She held up two black straps with little, black squares on them.

"Are…are those collars?" Shinji asked.

"Yep!" Misato said. "With a water-proof, fire-proof tracking device. We could track you from orbit with these puppies!"

"A _collar_!?" Asuka shrieked.

"Fire-proof?" Shinji asked, somewhat more dismayed by _that_ implication.

"Yep. Once you put these on, they don't come off till they're cut off," Misato explained. "Don't worry…the band's elastic. Won't choke you…but not big enough to slip off your head."

"I'm not wearing a _collar_!" Asuka screamed. "That's so demeaning!"

"Then call it a choker," Misato said. "Whatever let's you sleep at night. It's still going on."

"Wouldn't an ankle bracelet have been more practical?" Shinji asked, his mood starting to match Asuka's. The shock of the revelation had worn off, and the dismay had set in.

"Yeah, but I figured making you wear placards everyday saying 'I won't wander off' would have been impractical in a Plug," Misato said dryly. "This is a much more effective reminder, and practical, too." She seemed immensely pleased with herself. Or the misery of the children. It was hard to tell.

"The Fourth Child doesn't have a tracking device," Shinji snapped. "Why do _we_ have to have them?"

"Oh, yes, let's all do what the _Americans_ want, right? What do you say, Asuka? Because we all want to be just like _Samson_, hmm?" The girl glowered , as Misato expected. She grabbed one of the trackers, studied it as she would something disgusting, and looked slyly at Misato.

"Is _Rei_ wearing one of these?"

"Yes," Misato said, which was only a _bit_ of a fib. Rei wouldn't object when presented with one, so the fact she wasn't _now_ was trivial. These two didn't need to know about that. Sniffing, Asuka immediately put the collar on and fastened the catch. There was a slight beep, and the band tightened, just slightly. She shot daggers at Misato, and Misato simply sipped her beer smugly.

Shinji stared at the both of them, before meekly and miserably putting on his own. There was a beep, the slight snugness, and that was that. Misato looked pleased. "Look at you two," she said. "Starting a bold new fashion statement. Everyone at school will be copying you before you know it." Misato glanced at Shinji, who looked far less defiant than Asuka and far more miserable. "Don't be so glum, Shinji. It looks good…I'm tempted to put you in a dress and complete the ensemble."

"…I don't _want_ to wear a dress…" Shinji grumbled.

* * *

Shinji found he couldn't stop picking at the strap. It wasn't uncomfortable, but it was there, and it constantly reminded him it wasn't going away. He lay on his bed, facing the wall, as his SDAT player stopped, rewound, and started playing again. Even over the music, he heard the door slide open and close again. He felt warmth on his back, and knew that Asuka was crawling into bed again. She said nothing to him, and he knew she was facing away as her back pressed into his. He shivered for a moment, and then relaxed. The teenager in him was always nervous and confused from the smell and the sensation of having a girl so close, and it made him feel guilty and ashamed. Like he had done something wrong, and was still doing it and being judged for it.

It reminded him of the thing he had told her that had caused her to leave in the first place. Shinji found himself fixated on that point: the words, the feeling. The urge to reach out and cut at Asuka, the lack of guilt he had felt over it…and the great chasm of guilt he had fallen into afterward. He rolled over.

"Why did that bother you so much?" Shinji asked.

"What?" Asuka sat up abruptly, staring at him, blue eyes glittering in the dark.

"What I said?" He sat up, sliding off his headphones and bringing himself to her level. "At the school."

He couldn't make out her expression, and she was quiet for a moment. "It didn't," she said. "Why would anything _you _say bother me?" For a moment, he felt that guilt, the feeling of being far to inexperienced to deal with these things. For just a moment.

"It did, and I wish I hadn't said it," he replied.

"…You don't?" The words sound genuinely surprised. He had told her he had just said those words because he was angry, but it didn't occur to her that he actually _regretted_ them. She did things because she was angry all the time, and she never thought to reflect or regret any of them. Having someone else do it in regards to her was…strange.

"And, frankly, the way you kept wheedling me about if you were strong and all that…" he said, and she swallowed. Yeah, she had laid it on pretty thick.

"I just…it…bothers me, okay?" she said. "That's all. I mean…I don't like it when people misjudge me."

"That's not it," Shinji said, and she scoffed.

"What does _that_ mean? Are you accusing me of _lying_?"

"No, just…not telling the truth," he said.

"Isn't that the same thing?" she asked, narrowing her eyes.

"Not if you believe it," he said. "I should know…I make myself believe lies all the time. Then they aren't lies anymore." That struck her in a way she wasn't prepared for, and she felt rattled from it. Whenever Shinji got deep like this, it scared her.

"…You're really pathetic, you know that?" she said. For a moment, Shinji felt defensive and hurt from that. And then he felt miserable, for in truth, he _was_ pathetic. He was as pathetic as they came. And, in that realization, it occurred to him…

She was pretty pathetic, too. And so was Rei. And Misato. Hell, the whole lot of them were barely holding it together. It was a moment of shocking realization to the boy, the sheer magnitude of the faulty lines that connected their endeavor. How fragile the whole thing was. It was all so…pathetic.

"I do," he said. "I came here thinking I was going to have this big connection and understanding with my dad, and now I'm further from him then when I was before. I don't even know why I Pilot, now…" He hugged his knees in thought, and Asuka seemed to be trembling next to him. She was getting angry, but Shinji felt strangely calm in front of it. As though he didn't blame her for it.

"Aren't you listening to yourself?" she snarled. "Here you are, having been _selected_ to be a _Pilot_, just _given_ the opportunity, and look how you treat it! You mope about it, and whine about it, when others…I mean…"

"Had to work hard for it?" Shinji asked. She snapped her mouth shut. He looked at her in the dark, and for a moment, Asuka thought somebody else was sitting there. "Asuka, did you really have to work so hard, or were you just picked, too? Think about that." She opened her mouth to retort, but found she couldn't. She thought back on her past, the drive to excel, to prove herself, to be noticed, to be seen, to be accepted as the pivotal, most exceptional individual there was. To be a Pilot, to be…to be…

Had she ever had to fight that hard to begin with? She felt as though the floor was starting to drop away, as though each brick in her carefully constructed world, placed with the precision and care of a math all its own, was tumbling away. Mortar cracked, masonry fell, and she was in the middle of the collapse.

_Was it really that simple? Was it _all _that simple?_ Her trembling became more violent, somewhere between rage, disbelief, and despair. She then felt fingers curl into her own, and the trembling subsided. She studied the hand in hers, and looked up at Shinji. His face was calm. She seemed to come back for herself, and realized she was baring her teeth. She slowly closed her lips, her eyes still burning and her nostrils still flared.

"You're still better than me," he said. "I'm okay with that, you know." She found it hard to meet his eyes, and looked away, her hand limp in his. "Go to sleep," he said. He let go and turned away, dropping his SDAT gently on the floor. For a long time, she stared at the back of his head, until she could hear him clearly snoring in the dark. Part of her wanted to curl her fingers around his throat and squeeze until the windpipe burst. Part of her wanted to bash his head with her fists, to scream at him, to tell him how _dare_ he, to take back everything he said. To make it all a lie. To make it all what it was before.

And part of her was strangely…relieved. Grateful. As though a line had been cut, and then _this_ line had been cut, and then _this_ one here. As though a tension she didn't realize she had had just..vanished. And at the end of it, she was still Asuka Langley Soryu, and she was still a Pilot.

She swallowed, feeling the presence of the collar. Well…she _might_ be, but she might have blown that chance. She would have to work extra hard, from here on out, to prove she was reliable. To prove she was necessary. To prove she was the best. She looked down at Shinji. It might have been true before, what he said, but that may have changed now.

_You're still better than me._

"Damn right I am," she hissed at the back of his head, and he murmured in his sleep. She clamped her lips shut, and glanced around. Closing her eyes, and muttering to herself, she scoffed and cuddled up to Shinji, wrapping her arms around him. His smell was soothing, and his warmth spread to her. She nestled against his back.

"I swear to God, if you tell anyone about this…" she growled. Shinji said nothing in reply, and she took that to be agreement. Very soon, she too had drifted to sleep.

* * *

"Seems kind of _harsh_, doesn't it?"

"They can deal with it," Misato grunted, pitching a full beer can into the parking lot below. She watched the arch, the slow descent, the burst and pop of foaming beer. "Frankly, I'm glad they're embarrassed by it. It'll remind them not to do anything else."

"Yeah, but _collars_?" Kaji pleaded. "You were in such a good mood when you left. What the hell happened?" Misato let the phone drift from her ear, considering it. Honestly, the trackers had been a last minute sort of thing, something she had grabbed in the heat of the moment. And, had Shinji realized it, they were in fact meant for ankles. Misato thought he would note that from his observation, and was glad he didn't. Now, they had them, they were a public reminder that they screwed up, and hopefully it wouldn't happen again. And yet…still…

She had been in a good mood…and then she wasn't. It was like a switch had turned in her brain. On, off, on, off…forgive, forget, vindicate and punish. She groaned.

"God, I really screwed up, didn't I?" Misato sighed.

"I wouldn't say _that_, but you did get a little…well…" Kaji trailed off.

"Well, what am I supposed to do _now_?" Misato asked in a whining voice. "I already made a big deal about it! If I go back on it now and cut the damn things off, they won't have learned anything from it."

"I'm still trying to figure out where you got your parenting skills from," Kaji teased. "I can see it now: go to your room, and if you try to leave, watch out for the minefield. You can have the car, if you find the car bomb. And my personal favorite: bring your date home so I can have him cavity searched. You're a gem, Misato."

"I'm serious!" she snapped. "I was angry, all right? Reacted like I would with…a private or something. I feel like I can't win." She slouched on the railing. "I want to be the cool big sis, and let them do what they want, but I can't have them doing things like _that_!"

"Because they're weapons," Kaji said.

"Holy _God_, Kaji…"

"I'm just pointing out what Nerv has to say on it. And frankly, it's true: they are the best candidates for synchronization with the Evas, and that means the best hope for humanity."

"Except where _Samson_ is concerned," Misato muttered. "Here comes America, saving the day again!"

"How much have you had to drink?"

"Um…I…huh…" She rummaged through her remaining beer cans. "I have no idea…"

"Grendel is a formidable unit, _despite_ it's flaws, which are numerous," Kaji said. "And Samson is…well, Samson is Samson. Frankly, I think the only reason that Grendel operates as well as it does is because of the Pilot, but you tell me: is Samson the kind of kid you want saving the world?"

Misato glowered. Feeling loose from the alcohol, she had no reason or thought to hide how she felt or why. "Kaji, I just…have you ever seen a snake rear up on you?"

"No, but I know the sensation," he said.

"What about when you don't know what kind of snake it is, and it's still rearing up?"

"As in, you see something that might be dangerous, but you don't know how dangerous or if it's just a bluff?"

"Do you always have to make things more complicated?"

"I'm just trying to see if we're on the same page," he said defensively. Misato sniffed.

"Yeah, I guess…" she mused. "It's just…I'll be honest, it wasn't because Shinji had wandered off today."

"It was because he wandered off with Samson," Kaji said.

"Yes," Misato replied. "I just felt…so…I can't describe it. Then I got hold of the bracelets, and…I just couldn't think straight. I was so mad."

"And frightened."

"…a bit, yeah."

"You might just be a good guardian, yet, Mommy Misato," Kaji said. The words were teasing, but the tone warm. Misato hummed thoughtfully at it. "Look," he said. "Give it…oh, maybe two weeks, right? Then just remove the trackers. No harm, no foul, right? You can say they learned their lesson then, and we'll find something less obtrusive for them to use, like…dog tags, or a watch, or something."

"Maybe," Misato said. "Do you think I'm screwing this up?"

"Well, _yeah_, but isn't that the point?" Kaji asked. "Most people get to at least start with an infant and work their way up. You have two teenagers under your roof and you were told 'Ready, set, go,' and that was it. I mean, really, what _do_ you know about raising kids?"

"I feel I should be insulted…"

"I'm not trying to insult you," Kaji said patiently. "I'm just saying…you have a way of dealing with people. It may be right sometimes, but is it right _all_ the time? Is it right with the kids?"

"…Is it right with you?" Misato asked.

"Huh?"

"Nothing." Misato rubbed her eyes, feeling weary from the conversation. "I'll think about cutting them loose in two weeks. God, I have to get one for Rei. Don't let me forget, okay?"

"I'll get right on it," Kaji said. "Hey…you're not doing awful. And you will get better at this. Just…you know…don't make any decisions after we've been drinking. At least until you've vetted them with me, please?"

"…thanks, Kaji," Misato said, smiling slightly. "Good night."

"Night." His line clicked off, and Misato put her phone down. Yeah…yeah, she had overreacted. And been a bit mean. And a tad…psychotic. She had screwed up, but that was okay, right? Kaji said it was, so it had to be. A mistake to remember and not make again. She leaned back in her chair, and popped another beer. As she did, she heard a scraping next to her, and looked down to see Pen-Pen. He was looking at her expectantly.

"These are bad for you, you know," she pointed out, handing him the beer. He took in his beak and upended the can, draining the beer down his throat. He had gained quite the talent at drinking, in no small part due to Misato's coaching. She popped her own beer, and looked out over her little patch of Tokyo-3. Small steps, she told herself. Small steps, that's all.

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin:** I can't use the _Rebuild_ naming scheme…and not make a reference to the 'choker.' If you don't know what I'm talking about, you will. Anyway, I had to put it in (especially after seeing some fanart with it, and I just...couldn't...stop..._dwelling_ on it!), and it's not just a minor point, as you will see….oh, you will see!

As for the 'dress' comment, I cannot remember which fanfic it was that I heard of (couldn't find the title), but it referenced a list of things Misato was needing to do, and one of those was to to stop making Shinji wear dresses despite how cute it was or something thereof. I couldn't shake the idea from that point on that Misato has always secretly harbored a desire to do this, and may have actually done it, which continued to compound Shinji's already rampant neuroses. I can't write her character anymore without thinking that, somewhere in the darkest parts of her soul, Misato wants to dress Shinji up like a little doll. If anybody knows the fanfic that comes from, please let me know.


	27. Divinity

Shinji had long stopped blushing in embarrassment at his new accessory, and now wore an expression of resigned irritation. Kensuke was poking at the little box on his neck with a finger, while Toji let his head roll one way and then the other as he tried to place the tracking device into some sort of category.

"This is a Mark-13 Toshiba tracker, with a 24-hour GPS uplink and solid-state battery. This thing can run for ten years without a recharge!" Kensuke said in admiration.

"How do you know all this?" Shinji asked, in irritation.

"…I get bored?" Kensuke suggested half-heartedly.

"I thought Toshiba was a camera company," Toji mused.

"Well, yeah, but they make other stuff. Did you know that 10 percent of an Evangelion's artificial components come from Toshiba?"

"How do you _know_ all this?" Shinji repeated, a bit more shocked.

"They have to post all that stuff publicly. They can't say _what_ it was that they made, but they have to say they were involved in the project for purposes of transparency," Kensuke added. Shinji glanced across the cafeteria at Asuka, marveling at how she had…somehow…turned the device into some sort of fashion icon. Some of the girls had flocked to Rei to ask her about hers and where she had gotten it. Rei had simply stared at them with something bordering on irritation with maybe a little bit of hostility mingled in until the girls had retreated to safe distances.

The boys…didn't know what to make of Shinji's. He rubbed his neck in irritation. "This thing bothers me," he grumbled, batting away Kensuke's hand as though it was an irritating insect. "And it looks dumb!"

"No, no," Toji insisted. "It looks…um…well, it looks…"

"Distinctive," Kensuke offered.

"Unique," Toji added.

"Military-chic," Kensuke added.

"Very chic."

"Very modern."

"Slightly effeminate."

"Well, a bit more than _slightly_…" Kensuke mused.

"…Distinguished," Toji said, after shooting Kensuke a look.

"Like a girl's piece of clothing," Shinji moped, bouncing his forehead off of the table. "I don't get it! I go out for lunch with that American, _I _get punished! It's not like we were…vandalizing cars, or something."

"_Does_ he vandalize cars?" Toji asked.

"I wouldn't put it past him. I have it on authority that American teens are wild," Kensuke noted.

"Dude, seriously, what is the color of the sky in your world?" Toji asked. There was a sudden clatter next to them, and they all jumped. Rei had put her tray down next to them, though she did not make eye contact with any of them. They were too stunned to comment on it, and simply stared in awkward silence. For a moment, no one said anything.

"I wanted to talk to Shinji," she said, as if some explanation needed to be offered.

"Oh…well, that's cool," Toji said. "He's being all mopey, so maybe you can get him out of it. Nice choker, by the way."

"Go away," she replied. Toji and Kensuke glanced at each other, then at Shinji, then at Rei. The girl balled her hands into fists for a moment, clearly at struggle with something, then said impatiently, "You haven't left yet."

"But, we were here _first_," Kensuke said meekly. Rei glared at him, and without another word, he stood and fled to another table, earning odd looks from the kids already there. Toji gaped after him, then turned to see Rei staring into his eyes. She said nothing, but he stood and went to look for Hikari. Rei then turned back to Shinji, and softened somewhat.

"I'm…not feeling well," she said.

"I've…noticed?"

"Is that a question?"

"I think so," Shinji said. "You have been…well…I mean, is everything okay? What do you need to talk about?"

Rei opened her mouth, and then closed it. She looked down, quietly. Now that she had him, and had the chance to fulfill the overriding _need_…she couldn't. She didn't know what to say, or how to say it. She didn't know _why_ she did…she just knew she had to talk to Shinji.

"These collars are kind of dumb, huh?" Shinji offered.

"What?"

"These…tracker things."

"They were issued by Nerv for the purpose of protecting us," Rei said. "There's nothing dumb about that."

"They were 'issued' by Misato to punish us," Shinji corrected.

"To punish you and the Second Child for leaving and not contacting anyone," Rei added. Shinji tried to respond, and found he couldn't. She had got him with that one…

To his surprise, there seemed to be a twinkle of amusement in her eyes. Her expression was still calm and blank, but there was certainly amusement in there. "Did you just tease me?" he asked.

"No, I was making an observation," she said. "That if we are being collectively punished, it is for that actions of you and the Second Child, and not for mine." Again, that unmistakable glint.

"Don't blame me for this," Shinji said, probing. "I bet you did something to deserve it, as well." It was then Rei gave a small, secretive smile.

"If I did, then I wouldn't tell you," she said. The tone was flat, but Shinji felt that it was meant as a joke. He smiled, and she smiled a bit more evenly.

"Um…how are you feeling today?" The smile crept away, and she shrugged.

"Better, I believe. I'm…not sure why…I don't…I couldn't tell you what caused…yesterday's incident."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'd like to…but…" She shrugged, trying to find the words. Shinji wondered at the girl's discomfort, wondered if perhaps it was his fault she felt this way. He thought on it, thought of the times he'd seen her with his father. There were always smiles, always that light and easy banter between the two of them. It was always from a distance, but she seemed to become a different person in the presence of Gendo Ikari. It was as though she was desperate to please him. It made him wonder if…and he was truly surprised at this thought…he wondered if perhaps she should be talking to _Gendo_ instead.

"Rei, have you tried talking to my dad? About…whatever that was?"

She squirmed, as though shaking off an unclean thing. "No. I can't do that."

"I thought you liked my father."

"I would die for him," she replied, as though it was odd Shinji should think otherwise. More to the point, the implication seemed to be that she assumed Shinji would die for Gendo, as well.

"So why not talk to him about it?" Shinji asked, knowing how odd the words were even as he said them. He wouldn't trust his father for anything, and here he was trying to send Rei to him. His father and her did seem to have a connection, though, and he would be needlessly cruel not to suggest that avenue.

"…Are you trying to tell me you don't want to discuss this with me?" Rei asked, suddenly downtrodden.

"What? No. No! Why would you…no, I didn't…" Shinji started stammering, flustered and confused by the sudden turns that Rei's mind was taking. "I'm just…" He swallowed, took a breath, and gathered his thoughts. "I'm _trying_ to help. I just thought that maybe…my dad could help. If you want to talk to me _instead_, though, I'll…Rei, I'm always available to talk." It wasn't until he said the words that he realized how easily they had flowed, and how _hard_ they had been for him to say before. A part of his mind seemed to take a seat at the table next to him.

_This is a tie between you and another soul,_ it observed, _and you already are so tangled up with the redhead. These ties are going to strangle you, I bet. Strangle you and leave you for nothing_. Shinji felt the sudden urge to glare, but knew there was nothing to glare at. It was simply the same, tired voice in his head reminding him of his own worthlessness.

"Do you mean that?" Rei asked, and she seemed to straighten.

"Always."

"That's…" She smiled, a small little smile that made Shinji shiver, and send a flock of butterflies up his stomach and dancing along his spine. "Thank you, Shinji."

He laughed, and the smiled vanished. "I'm sorry," he said, "That's the second time you've said 'thank you,' to me. It's just…it makes me feel good to hear it." The smile slowly came out of it's cave again, and Rei blushed.

"So, Baka and the Doll are enjoying a moment." Both of them glanced up to see Asuka towering at the edge of the table, her hands on her hips. Rei's smile slipped, and something like loathing came onto her face. Shinji locked eyes with Asuka, and gave a world of pleading in them. She felt shaken by the expression, and tried to interpret what it was that he was saying to her in that wordless moment. Several mean thoughts bubbled to the surface, but she acknowledged that she was in an already mean mood: they had no relevance.

_Let us be objective, my dear_, she grumbled in her mind. She sighed, and locked eyes with Rei. "So…how's the consensus on the breakdown? Any more on the horizon?" Shinji deflated, and his expression said it all.

_Really? Really, Asuka?_

"There are no more in the foreseeable future, Second Child," Rei said crisply.

"…Good. It was bad for Shinji to not have a reliable partner," Asuka said. "I'd hate to see you kept out of the next fight." Rei's eyes widened, her only acknowledgment of the unexpected statement.

"…I'll…remember that," she murmured, trying to gauge what Asuka's intentions in the words, wondering if there was something surreptitious beneath them. Asuka glanced at Shinji and smirked. _There. I was_ nice. _Happy_?

"Asuka does care about us, Rei," he said. "She just has a weird way of showing it." Asuka's expression became frozen, and she sniffed.

"Please, don't get any ideas. I'm still the better than you two twerps, but a team is a team, and we can't go breaking it over stupid, silly little things like…feelings and…stuff." She muttered something unintelligable after that, and shook her head. "Whatever. We have a simulation exercise today, right? I'll see you all there. Try not get all blubbery before then, okay?" She snapped a look at Shinji. "Especially you." She spun on her heel and marched off.

"…What just happened?" Rei asked, confused.

"I think we became a team again," Shinji pondered.

* * *

"Domo arigato, Mister Ro-BOT-o, domo…domo…"

"You ruin every song you sing," Aoba grumbled, massaging his temples.

"I hate that song," Hyuga added. Cooper continued drumming on his desk, bobbing his head. A shadow fell across his terminal, and he glanced up at Misato.

"Seriously, do you do _any_ work?" she asked, wearily.

"I've _done_ my work," he insisted. "I've got a whole _slew _work I've done. Want to check my reports?"

"So you're just…what…this is what you do when you've got nothing to do?"

"I am easily amused with an _extremely_ short attention span," Cooper said rapidly. "Do you know what I'm like when I have Lincoln Logs?"

"Do I have to find out?" Misato asked carefully. She glanced at the bridge crew. "How do you guys handle him all day long? He's like a hyperactive kid with too much candy."

"I want to strangle him," Aoba grumbled.

"I like him. He's kind of like a puppy in a uniform," Ibuki said.

"A what?" Hyuga asked, glancing at her in surprise. Cooper rolled back and forth in the chair, eminently interested in being talked about. It was a special kind of vanity for him.

"I…just…think of Cooper like he's a puppy. Then it's easier to put up with him."

"Don't you like cats?" Misato asked, a smirk on her face.

"I can like dogs, too. Besides, puppies are a completely different story. Tell me _you_ don't like puppies."

"I'm your CO, I don't have to answer that," Misato said briskly.

"You really think of Cooper as a puppy?" Hyuga repeated, very confused by that admission.

"I mean, I even got him treats," Ibuki said, meekly. She held up a small, tin box filled with lemon-cookies.

"Oh, snap!" Cooper said, hopping up from his chair. Misato stared at Ibuki like she was the weirdest little thing she had ever seen, while Cooper immediately began picking through the box.

"Only one. I may make you work for the rest," Ibuki warned.

"Like, what, roll over, speak, all that?" Cooper asked.

"If I'm feeling mean, maybe. I was thinking more like take over half of my process checklist."Cooper chewed on a cookie thoughtfully.

"I can do that. Rather'd roll over for one, though," he mumbled.

"So, what, you're making Cooper the team pet now?" Misato sneered. "Do you have any idea how weird that sounds?"

"It gets boring up here on watch," Ibuki protested.

"So your solution is to pretend Cooper is a puppy?"

"…It gets…_boring_…up here…on watch!" Ibuki replied tersely. Misato raised her eyebrows, and backed up carefully. Aoba eyed the box of cookies.

"Do…do I get one of those?"

"No."

"I…but…"

"What about me?" Hyuga asked.

"Of course you do," Ibuki said in a sunny tone. Aoba stammered, watching Hyuga grab a cookie helplessly as the other man grabbed one of the lemon-cookies.

"I can…smell the citrus," he whimpered, when something cut through on the bridge's speakers. As one, all present stared at the strange, synthesized voice emanating from the ceiling.

"Amayenamonioyameyanaioeyomonominiomimnamoe…" it stuttered, one long, constant stream of monotone syllables comprised solely of vowels and nasal consonants.

"What the _hell_ is that?" Cooper murmured, putting his cookie down away from his keyboard and studying his monitors. All of the bridge techs leaned over their stations. Misato keyed a line to Ritsuko.

"Ritz," she said, "Somethings going on up here…"

"I know, I know, the voice, right?" was the impatient response. "It happened as soon as we installed Node 13."

"…Gonna have to act like I don't know what that is, Ritz."

"Or you could have just said you don't know what it was, right?" Ritsuko replied sarcastically.

"Ritz!"

"Node 13 was the next memory bank due for a refit. We just installed it, and as soon as we did…red-zones across the board, blankouts, _this_…"

"What the hell is going on?" Misato glanced up to see Ennis and two others walk onto the bridge. One was his First Sergeant, Deveraux, and the other was Capt. Merritt, the woman who used to handle Samson. She had moved into a sort of executive officer's position in the staff, now.

"Talk to you in a minute, Ritz," Misato said. "We're trying to pinpoint it. Is this happening throughout the facility?"

"Every speaker," Ennis confirmed. Merritt was scribbling something on a pad of paper, counting along with the syllables.

"This doesn't sound like gibberish," Ibuki murmured.

"It's not gibberish," Merritt confirmed, "I don't know what it is, but this is a distinctive sequence or pattern." She was still scribbling, trying to capture the distinctive syllables and arrange them.

"It's starting to garble our interior comms in the hanger," Deveraux added. "We've been switching to hand mikes and cell phones."

"All of our systems are starting to lock-up," Hyuga reported. It was in that moment that Aoba straightened, as if he had touched a wire.

"Node 13…Ibuki!" He rolled back. "Is Node 13 one of the protein-based nodes?"

"…yes. Yes, I think it is," she said, pulling her ear in thought. Kicking back to his console, Aoba furiously began jumping through back-door routes, finding more and more systems locking down. Misato slowly walked to the chair, becoming more uneasy than she already had been.

"Aoba, what are you—" Her words were cut off as a klaxon sounded.

"Angel alert!" Aoba snapped. "It's…it's in the Pribnow Box in the Sigma Unit! It's _in_ the facility!"

Cooper slammed a button on his jury-rigged console, opening a direct line to the Eva hangers. "Launch them!" he cried. "Priority Alpha-Golf-3-2-2! Launch all Evas _right now_!"

Down in the hangers, personnel scrambled clear. There were no Plugs in the Evas, but the prefix code for the launch was an imperative. There didn't need to _be_ Plugs: the point was to void the structure of any and all Evas. As soon as the last technician was cleared from the catapults, Units-00, 01, and 02, and Grendel were launched clear of their cradles and up into Tokyo-3. People going about their day stopped and stared at the sudden arrival of the behemoths, and for a frozen moment waited for the customary warning alarm of an Angel attack. When none came, the unease grew and grew. A slow, dull panic, an almost animal thing, began to creep through the city, oozing into the minds and souls of its inhabitants.

* * *

Shinji and Rei had just enough time to process the interesting exchange with Asuka when a distinct _something_ latched onto the air. The sensation that there was movement, that something was happening. The lunch room began to buzz with activity. Students began murmuring, and pushing to the windows. Shinji and Rei followed the motion, and heard the students confusion.

"…the Evas are out…"

"…no warning…"

"…they're just standing there…"

Shinji stood, and glanced across the cafeteria at Asuka. She was halfway back to her table, looking over the heads of the crowd at the towering humanoids. He caught her gaze, and she shrugged in concern and confusion. _No idea_. He noted there was no defiance, or arrogance, or aggression in her face, and that almost frightened him _more_ than seeing the Evas standing in the clear, without _them_ inside.

"We should go," Rei said. "There is something happening." He could have almost laughed at those words, but he didn't.

"Yeah, Shinji mumbled. "We should…come on." As one, he, Rei, and Asuka hurried to the cafeteria's doors.

* * *

Misato nibbled her thumb as the bridge crew shouted reports and commands to each other. There was nothing to say at the moment, for they were on autopilot, attempting to respond to the situation. She felt her phone vibrate, and she looked at it to see Ritsuko's number. She quickly answered it.

"The comm lines are shut down," Ritsuko said. "I have an update for you."

"I'm listening."

"Sigma Unit has been evacuated and sealed, and we're monitoring what's happening on the inside to the best of our ability. Right now…the best I can estimate, from a rough reconstruction of events, is that this Angel hitchhiked on one of the protein disks inside the node. We're still trying to figure out how it got there, but…" Ritsuko trailed off.

"Any idea on how to get it the hell out of my GeoFront?" Misato demanded.

"Working on it, Sergeant Rock," Ritsuko said, tiredly. "We've got it covered down here. Keep your phone handy for the next update."

"Thanks. Good luck," Misato added, hanging up and realizing that the chatter on the bridge had stopped. All eyes were on her. "What?"

"We're…getting reports from the JSSDF," Ibuki said. "They…they say that there's a mass in orbit. They don't have the same equipment we do, but…they're pretty sure it's an Angel." For a long time, there was nothing said on the bridge, as the patter of the unknown language continued to stream over the speakers until, with a suddenness that made all of them flinch, ceased.

* * *

**Notes from GobHobblin**: Hey! Hey, you! Why are you here reading fanfics and not watching _Pacific Rim_? Go. Go now and watch it. Every minute you sit here reading this is one more minute with _Pacific Rim_. It's okay, I'll wait.

….Why are you still here? _Pacific Rim_! Do it! Do it now!


	28. As-Sirat

The Commander walked a slow, deliberate circle on the bridge, his gloved hands folded one into the other behind his back. "Who ordered the Evas launched?"

"I did, sir," Cooper said.

"That was a good call: we can ensure they won't be infected by the first Angel," Gendo noted. "How is tracking on the second?"

"Still stable, in orbit," Ibuki said. "It hasn't moved, but it looks as though some smaller pieces are detaching."

"Are we sure it's not an asteroid or some other stellar object?"

"Telescopic confirmation has shown it to be a mass object that is organic in appearance," Ibuki confirmed.

"Hmm…heaven above, hell below, and the angel of death on my back…" Gendo murmured through a small grin. The bridge techs glanced nervously at each other, the Americans stood patiently and waiting, and Misato crossed her arms in consternation.

"Where are the Pilots?" he asked, turning to Misato.

"The team we sent to retrieve the First, Second, and Third Child are returning with them now. The Fourth Child is prepped in his ready room."

"In his Plug Suit?"

"Yes, sir."

"Have the other three prep their suits on their arrival. Maj. Ennis, the computer banks you use for Grendel: they're solid-state quantum computers, correct? No organic components?"

"None, sir, and in a separate unit from Sigma."

"What about the connections to MAGI?"

"Physically cut, for the moment." Also good…the first Angel had already locked a line into the computer in a remarkably swift amount of time, and large swathes of protein banks were being infected. One of the three MAGI units was close to shutdown, and it wouldn't be long before the other two were attacked. Knowing the rest of their resources could be spared for the moment was flexibility. Gendo nodded.

"Lt. Cooper," he said. "Show our techs to your computer banks. They're primitive, and it will be a chore to get them working, but we need to rig our Evas central processing units to them in order to deal with the second Angel. Now…" he closed his eyes, pondering. "Without MAGI, we can only estimate, but I would say that the Angel in orbit is capable of generating a massive AT Field…maybe the biggest on record. The Japanese Evas, combined, should be able to produce a sufficient field to counteract the Angel when it attacks. _Maybe_. Could Grendel contribute to that field?"

"Honestly?" Ennis asked. "Barely. It's own AT Field is just sufficient enough to offer basic protection and a negation of the square-cube law."

"Frankly, sirs, I think that the presence of Grendel in the midst of that kind of a combined AT Field could have negative effects on the unit," Cooper chimed in. "We may be able to contribute something, but the risk of a feedback could crush the unit, or in the very least microwave it." Gendo nodded, thoughtfully. It confirmed his suspicions as to Grendel's heavy ordnance and armor: its AT Field was too weak to trust on its own. It had proved to be very effective against the Angels thus far, but many of those had weakened AT Fields, or none present whatsoever.

An Angel relying so heavily on its AT Field was something else. Grendel was a hammer, and could solve things the way hammers usually did: bash it until it starts working or stops working. Going up against the Angel in orbit, however, would be like using a hammer against a tsunami: generally wasteful, mildly amusing, and wholly counterproductive.

No, what was needed on that front was an equivalent force to meet an equivalent force. Three Evas with massed AT Fields should be sufficient.

"Have the Fourth Child inserted anyway," Gendo decided, "To take on a support role on the outskirts of the city. He can act as an observer for the other three."

"Right," Ennis said.

"The first Angel?" he then asked.

"Dr. Akagi seems to think it might have an issue with ozone. We're diverting pipes towards the affected area now in order try that option."

"Keep me posted," Gendo said, and turned to leave. Having ended the discussion, the various elements with Nerv jumped to their orders. As Fuyutsuki and Gendo ascended to the command deck, Gendo allowed himself a rare smile.

"You look like the cat that ate the canary," Kozo observed.

"You know, Kozo," Gendo murmured, "I hate to say it, but I'm actually enjoying myself."

"I'm frankly not surprised," the older man chided. "What else would invigorate Gendo Ikari like working his way out of a trap? Especially a planet-destroying trap."

"I feel…there was a double-meaning to that statement."

"Whatever gave you that idea, sir?" Gendo didn't smile, but he did wave a finger nonchalantly in the air, then tapped the side of his nose in a knowing manner. He took his seat, reclining as the screens spewed static and gibberish across the walls.

"What did you make of the transmission?" he asked.

"Over the loudspeakers?" Gendo nodded, and Kozo rocked on his heels. "Vowel intensive, nasal consonants…almost more like a proto-language. Simple noises combined into easy, repetitive…perhaps. I wouldn't know, linguistics is not something I'm especially skilled with." He gently rested the tips of his fingers, one to the other, in front of his face, a motion of thought. "If it _is_ a proto-language, one could call it a divine language."

"As of one that existed before the Tower of Babel made strangers of us all," Kozo mused.

"Yes…something like that."

"What do you suppose the Angel was trying to tell us?"

"Nothing nice, I'm sure."

"Or it was preaching. 'We are the way, the truth, and the light, repent and be extinct.'" Something about that…perhaps it was the tone, perhaps it was just the combination of words or the timing…made Gendo snort in a short, sharp bark of laughter. The bridge was notably silent, as all eyes gazed up at the unheard of sound from the Commander. Emotions were something that Gendo Ikari lacked: this was a common fact, and one of the scientific constants of our limited universal understanding. Whatever it was that humans gained in their lives, from womb to tomb, that little spark that made a human _human_, Gendo Ikari had never gained it. To be proved otherwise was unthinkable, and the crew went back to their frantic preparations, the outburst forgotten. It simply did not happen; the mind refused to rationalize it.

"I repeat my earlier observation: you're in a remarkably good mood," Kozo said. Gendo shrugged, his face once again an impenetrable mask.

"We're all human, Kozo, even those of us who are not," he answered. "Perhaps it's the fact that we are facing a dual attack with a significantly higher probability of failure. If we lose MAGI, that Angel below us will have a direct line to Terminal Dogma. And failing _that_, the Angel above simply needs to drop it's mass onto the GeoFront and pulverize it's way into contact with what's below. After that, it's Instrumentality as _they_ plan."

"And this…pleases you?"

"Not in the slightest. But knowing I may lose today…something about it is strangely liberating. Like I can do no wrong." He closed his eyes. "I won't be able to answer for my failures. It's like the ultimate clean slate."

"The way your mind wanders," Kozo marveled.

* * *

Samson slept on the bench, sitting upright and tense despite his repose. He dreamed odd dreams, ones that made him cower in the dark corners of his mind. He was crawling through gray slime, mud that didn't smell like mud or taste like mud. He was naked, exposed, unprotected. As he crawled, he could see the ankles of those walking past him, not sinking into the muck. Boots, mostly, all walking the same way he crawled. He could glance up to see the faces of people he recognized, but didn't know, half-memories from someplace somewhere else, talking to each other. They couldn't see him. He was below.

He was now walking in a cold place, black and empty. There was a slit cut down his stomach, and if he opened it, he saw that the only thing inside was a bundle of what looked like turtle egg. He gripped it and both hands, and pulled it away with a crackling sound, feeling the sensation within as the bundle left. He held the thing up, regarding it.

_It's what they give you when you do what they tell you to_. He recognized the voice, but couldn't place it. The bundle cracked like a single egg, and red seeped out of it. He felt a great pain in his chest, like something beautiful had been lost. _It's what they take away when it makes you too human_.

The red burned his fingers, and he opened his eyes, feeling cool and slick from a sudden and feverish sweat. Slowly, he moved his head to the right like an insect, regarding the door of the ready room, and his memories returned to him. The enemy was on the doorstep. Suit up. We have work to do.

The door opened, and Shinji entered the room, wearing his blue Plug Suit and white Interface Headsets clipped into his hair. He looked like a girl, and the newest addition emphasized it.

"That's a cute little thing you've added to your ensemble," Samson said. Shinji grimaced, feeling the tracker digging just above the Suit's collar. Misato had been adamant they wear them even in the Evas.

"It's not like I _chose _to wear it, Samps," he grumped, spreading his hands in a helpless gesture.

"Of course you did: they told, you agreed." Samson stood, the motion made more mechanical in appearance by the suit and the helmet. "Does it explode when you take it off?"

"No," Shinji said defensively, though now he _was_ wondering if it would. Misato wouldn't do that, right? No matter how angry she got…

He shook the thought aside, and crossed his arms. "Can you even see indoors with that thing on?" He jerked his chin towards the helmet.

"I see you," Samson replied, making a fist and holding it fingers-out near where his eyes roughly were. Shinji snickered.

"They're moving us up to the surface to install the Plugs. I was asked to come fetch you."

"Ready. Willing. Able. Let's roll, brother," Samson said. Normally, he would have trailed leads like runaway tendons, but that would have been a nightmare to get up to the surface in. The leads had been moved separately, to be installed on site. "Did they give you an idea of the plan?"

"Misato conference called us on the way over," Shinji explained. "The girls and I will handle the Angel in orbit, if it decides to come down. You'll sit on the outside to act as an observer."

"I get all the _fun_ jobs," Samson chided.

"I thought you'd be upset you weren't involved," Shinji observed.

"What, being under a giant press? Naw. You kids go have fun, I'll watch from my little hideaway and have fruity drinks while waiting."

"Jackass."

"Oh, my. Shinji has a chip on his shoulder," Samson teased as they walked down the hallway.

* * *

By the time the second Plug had been installed (a harrowing process when outside the hangar), something very large landed in the hills to the south, shaking the earth and knocking Asuka to the ground. She landed on her seat with a squeak as a technician fell next to her, coming down heavily on his palms. It was expected, but still terrifying when outside of an Eva: the Angel was dropping pieces of itself.

The girl stood, a hand on the small of her back and wincing from the painful landing. "How long does it take to get into your Eva?" she grumbled, gazing up at the emergency rigging. Construction cranes had been commandeered to position the Plugs and assist the Pilots into place, and she swallowed as she saw the tall things swaying from the aftershock of the impact.

_And you go up next._ She tapped a toe impatiently and more than a bit nervously. She didn't like heights.

"That is a long way up." The tapping stopped, and she shuddered. She turned, and glared at the black faceplate of Samson's helmet. He was looking up, studying the insertion process. Shinji's plug was securely into Unit-01, but not so far as to engage the automatic seating process. They had to do that carefully, and the shaking of the cranes needed to abate, first.

"Your powers of observation are _remarkable_, Hurensohn," she sneered. "Indeed, if you had not arrived to point that out, I would have _forever_ been trapped in the uncertainty of knowing how high that was."

"I don't doubt it," he said.

"And what are _you_ doing here? Shouldn't you be by your Eva?"

"Shouldn't you be by yours?"

"Mines over there," she snapped, pointing to Unit-02 roughly a block away. "Which is _much_ closer than yours. Why do you care?"

"Why do you?"

"I…I asked you first!" Samson's head rotated down to fix its gazed on Asuka. The movement made her instinctively want to strike him.

"…Are you worried about Shinji?"

"What!?" The question seemed innocuous, but the tone and timing had caught her off guard. "Why…would I…what, Baka up there? Why would I be worried about him?"

"It's always easy to tell what you're thinking," he pondered. "You do the opposite of what you mean. It's a dead giveaway, more honest than if you were simply honest." Asuka tried to say something, but couldn't. When it was clear that she wasn't going to speak, Samson continued. "You're the kind of person who's only real way of showing affection is to beat the other person into submission. You'll kill something you love before you kiss it. I bet you'll be the reason Shinji up there dies someday. I mean, think about it…how many people you truly care about, how many of them are still around?" That stung. That stung in a way she hadn't anticipated, and before she could recover, Samson simply gave a little shrug, turned to leave, and added, "You're a survivor, but that's only another way of saying you'll die alone."

As he began to walk away, Asuka's pain suddenly went hot, and she shrieked, "And what about you!? What does that make you?" Samson turned, honestly considering the question. He opened his hands, as though crucified.

"Me? I'm one of a kind. First and only," he said, then disappeared into the crowd of technicians. Asuka stared after him, feeling the creeping, clawing fingers of doubt and loathing and fear and pain from those words. She let her head drop, feeling very isolated, very alone. Very ignored.

And then the anger returned. If those words had come from someone like Kaji…or Shinji…that would have stuck with her. That would have cut her in a way she would never have been able to recover from. She recognized the truth, recognized the pattern that had been innocently insinuated upon. She raised her head,her lips curling into a snarl. It wasn't Kaji or Shinji that had said those words.

It was the Hurensohn. The feeling to run away, to crawl into a hole and die, retreated in the face of her rage. What she had felt for him had started as irritation, disgust. It had grown into loathing.

Now it was hatred. Pure, unbridled, white hot hatred. She hated Samson. She hated him more than she loved life. She hated everything he was, for what he had said, and what he tried to do…

Tried to do…tried…

In a strange little moment, a logical thought pierced the veil of her emotion, and she realized…_realized_…that Samson had _tried_ to make her run away. He had planted a new seed of doubt in her mind, and the only reason she recognized it was because it had come form someone she detested so severely, it gave her the distance to fume at his words in a way she would not have been able to if it came from nearer quarters.

"I'm not going anywhere," she sneered. "I'm here. I'm staying. I will stay and I will _make_ you regret that."

"Miss-"

"I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!" she screamed, whirling on the technician. The larger man retreated, stunned and a little afraid of the teenager. She stared at him for a blank moment. "WHAT!?"

"We…w….we need to get you…the Plug. You need to get inside, so we can…"

"Stop talking already! I know! I'm going!…where is it?"

"That…" He pointed in the general direction of Unit-02's feet. Of course it would be.

"Stop talking! Your voice makes me want to strangle you!" she screamed at him, then stalked away. She was Asuka Langley Soryu, she was a Pilot, and by God's _teeth_ she was going to prove it to that Yankee demon. One way or the other.


	29. The Crease

"This is so primitive," Misato grumbled.

"This is state of the art!" Cooper protested, "Top of the line, it…do you know how much it cost to build Paragon?"

"Do you know how slow these calculations are compared to MAGI's?" Misato grumbled, studying a readout over Hyuga's shoulder. She grumbled as a leg hit her foot; there was an American Soldier under the console with a Nerv tech, both of them furiously completing a hackneyed slave-circuit job. Hyuga's expression was irritated, as he was having to try and work around the two.

"What, like two seconds slower? Two?"

"Try 3.5 seconds slower, I've been calculating it," Misato grumbled. "Three point five is an eternity. We can all be dead in less than a second."

"Only if you're not paying attention!" Cooper protested. He didn't like having the American Paragon computer denigrated like that; he had a fondness for the dinosaur. "The human element is the most important part!"

"Cooper, calm down and you get a cookie," Ibuki offered, waving the box in his direction. She was away from her console, as it had been gutted completely in order to make the overhaul. Four techs were crowded around it, furiously wiring and soldering the new connections into place. Cooper's chair seemed to spin of it's own accord, and he eyed the box greedily.

"Those are very tasty cookies," he pondered. Misato helped herself to one, earning a look of rebuke from Ibuki. She shrugged, holding it close to her nose to block out the smell of heated metal. MAGI and Paragon spoke similar languages, but they're hardware was completely different. They weren't designed to mesh, and really couldn't. In order for the rest of the bridge to tap into it, they were having to do a nasty bit of patchwork, through Cooper's console, in order to accomplish the task. That worried Misato; truthfully, the computer they would be using was no slouch, but it wasn't designed for what was about to happen to it. Further, there was only one pathway in or out; Cooper's console. If it couldn't handle the load, they'd be up the proverbial river.

The room brightened, and she glanced up. The screen display was on, displaying Unit-00 moving down an empty city street. Misato smiled, happy to finally have _eyes_ again.

"Can we talk to them, yet?" she asked.

"We can talk to Unit-02," Aoba said. "Grendel is already patched through to Paragon, but it's only locked to Cooper's console at the moment. They should be the next up."

"That's fine, just bring 02 up," Misato said. Aoba tacked a few keys, and Asuka's image appeared in a corner of the screen. The rest of the display obediently tracked to 02, which was standing behind 01.

"This the Second Child, reporting in!" Asuka said tersely. "Just checking the Plug on 01 to make sure it's seated."

"That's…well, that's actually very helpful, thank you, Asuka," Misato said. _Who was this and what was she doing in 02_, she wondered curiously. No matter: Asuka was being proactive in a manner that was actually helpful, so Misato decided to see how long that would run it's course and milk it for all it was worth. "Listen, you're the only one we can talk to at the moment. We're still working a game-plan down here—"

"Impact imminent," Hyuga said.

"Hold on and brace," Misato said, crouching slightly as all activity halted. A few seconds passed, and then a dull rumble. The floor seemed to drop a few inches, and Misato swayed. A moment passed, and everyone was back to work. "All right. We need you to act as a comm's hub until we can get everyone up and running."

"Can do," Asuka said. "Just pass on what you want and…Is that a cookie?"

"Huh?" Misato glanced at her hand.

"You have cookies on the bridge?"

"Lemon cookies," Cooper called. "They're crazy awesome! Ibuki is house-training me!" Asuka was quiet for a moment, then shook the last statement from her mind.

"Are those going to be there when we're done?"

"Asuka, we're dealing with two Angels right now while staring down imminent extinction. Is the cookie really that important right now?"

"…It was a moment ago."

"Tell everyone to spread out a bit until we know how we want you deployed. I'm sending you coordinates for where I want Grendel, _you_ deploy him. Got it?" For a moment, Misato regretted what she said, for Asuka had a sudden look of gloating on her face. Misato realized she had, by default, placed Asuka in charge, a sudden chill went down her spine. Would the girl be _manageable_ once it she was officially recognized as being in charge? Appointing herself the boss was one thing. _Being_ appointed was another.

"It'll be done, Misato!" Asuka said fiercely, making a fist in enthusiasm. "Be back in five!" The line cut, and Misato glanced down at Hyuga.

"We probably all going to die, right?" he asked.

"Hyuga, your optimism does us all credit," Misato grumped.

* * *

Asuka felt giddy at the thought of issuing orders, but that giddiness was kept in place by the ever-present pressure of the collar. _Don't screw it up. You need to prove you are valuable to them. This is your chance_. She wanted to burst into bombastic demands, cowing her newfound subordinates into obedience. She took a breath, and closed her eyes. They weren't subordinates…you are relaying commands. You are the secretary.

_But an _important _secretary!_

_Don't screw it up_.

She opened a three-way link to all the other Evas. Shinji, Rei, and Samson's beetle-black helmet appeared. For a moment she grimaced: he was probably sleeping in there.

"Okay, listen up!" she snapped. "I just got word from the Center: I'm the only one with comms up, so they're using me to pass on orders." She toggled up a map icon with a predesignated coordinate marker on it, and sent it to Grendel. "Hurensohn," she said, still somewhat professional but unable to hide her loathing. "Here's where you set up. Try not to fall and break your spine, because that would be just _so_ awful."

"Coordinates received," he said flatly. "Deploying." Outside, she saw Grendel turn, crouch, and leap into the air, sailing away as if flying. She bit the inside of her lip, tasting blood. He was so calm, and that irritated her immensely. She snorted, and cut the line. She looked at Shinji and Rei.

"Okay, we need to put a little distance between us. They don't have a plan yet, but they want us ready to move when they do, so…" She pulled up a map of the immediate area around 02, and toggled three points, judging the distance between the three to be satisfactory to Misato. She marked one '00,' another '01,' and a third '02.' She sent it over. "Let's set up like this. That should give us room to readjust if we need to."

"Got it," Shinji said, and 01 moved away in front of her. Asuka adjusted 02's position, to avoid tangling on his power cable.

"Moving now," Rei confirmed, and she saw 00's IFF obey. Asuka waited until all that was under way, then moved to her own predetermined point, setting up and waiting till Grendel's IFF finally reached its point. She keyed up the bridge again.

"We're all set!" she said.

"That's good work, Asuka," Misato said. Hyuga was just off frame, nibbling on one of the lemon cookies. "We have Grendel's comm line up now, and we should have 00's next. Once we get the JSSDF patched into Paragon, we'll have a better understanding on what to do."

"Paragon?"

"The American computer," Misato said. "MAGI is being eaten, so we have to adjust, so…things may be a little slower than normal. Just be ready." Misato clicked off, and Asuka keyed up the other Pilots, thinking how much she wanted one of those cookies.

* * *

"We may have gotten a break," Kozo said, tapping his tablet. "Reports coming in from JSSDF: the orbital object is beginning its descent, but the projected impact area will be beyond the city.

"If it hits, it'll still disintegrate a good portion of Tokyo-3," Gendo murmured, "Leaving us all the weaker: to either the other Angel, or the next one to come along."

"At least we don't have to worry about this one hitting Terminal Dogma," Kozo said. Gendo closed his eyes. So this was Sahaquiel. What should have been the Tenth Angel.

Now, though, it was the Twelfth, with the Eleventh down in the basement. That one was…Iruel. That was what was supposed to come after Sahaquiel. That one had _no_ description, but Gendo was fairly certain that it was Iruel. Nothing in the Scrolls had indicated two attacks at the same time. And what was more, these were both very soon after the Tenth Angel. What was happening? Why the deviations?

"The Children seem to be in top form today," Kozo ventured. Gendo opened his eyes, grunting.

"After this week, I'm frankly surprised," he muttered. He was still wondering if his decision had been the right one. The Third Child had become something of a contaminant in Rei's development, and that was starting to present variables he wasn't ready for. Variables that reflected upon himself. He grimaced, thinking back to Dr. Akagi's advice. Would it be best to simply restart?

He filed that thought away for the moment. The three Pilots participating directly in the operation were on screen now. Misato had come up with a battle-plan to deploy them to three cardinal points further afield from their present position, to try and create a 'net' for Twelfth Angel. One should be able to at least offer some resistance with their AT Field, allowing the others to rapidly move to and support the contact point. He was about to bless it when his phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and stared at it, bewildered.

Gendo couldn't even remember the last time someone called him on the phone.

He answered it. "Yes?"

"It's me, sir." It was Dr. Akagi. "The ozone has failed. It started to recede, but then re-adapted, and is thriving on it."

"An adaptive organism," he pondered. "That's unfortunate."

"We're still trying to respond to that, but there's something you need to know: there was a virus inside of MAGI."

"A virus?"

"A worm was collecting data and sending it out. I just found it, and frankly, I don't think I would have found it had it not been for the invasion from the Angel."

"Sending it out to where?"

"I'll have to backtrack later. I don't know how long it's been here, but I have a guess as to how it came in." Gendo let his eyes drift down to Cooper at his station. He did, too. The Americans had been very sneaky.

"File that away for later," he said. "One thing at a time. Keep me posted on—" The lights died, though the computer systems remained operating. He grumbled. "Was that the Eleventh Angel?"

"It's playing with the power relays," she confirmed. "It's probing."

"Keep me posted," he said again, and hung up.

* * *

"I can see it," Shinji murmured, observing a black spot in the sky, like a tick against the blue. That black spot was about to get much, _much_ larger. The ground shook from another impact, this one distressingly close. He could see five more pieces on the way down.

"An N2 barrage is about to be launched to try and push it further along," Misato said. "Make sure your filters are up." Shinji watched the screen go solid for a moment, then readjust back down to a strangely muted view of the world. He felt his heart pounding in his ears as he waited, and then…one, two, five…a small flurry of points of light around the shape. There was a long silence, and then…

"Not much, but just enough. It definitely won't come down in the city. Grendel, you need to readjust your position, five kilometers to the east."

"Affirmative," the reply came.

"God, I hate him," Asuka hissed. Shinji glanced down at her image, about to say something, and realized that Asuka was speaking a direct line. It was, for all intents, private. He closed his other channels.

"He's not so bad, when you give him a chance," Shinji said.

"Don't you _dare_ take his side!" she raged, and he recoiled. He was used to seeing her angry, but that was beyond angry. For a moment, she had become someone else entirely. She relaxed, looking at his face, and glanced away, angry at herself.

"Did you two…have an argument or something?"

"I don't want to talk about it," she muttered.

"I…" Shinji glanced up at the spot. It was a little bigger, now, and glowing at the edges. "I'm thinking you do, since you have a direct line to me." He looked back at her image, where she was giving him a withering look. "You know, you can have someone be concerned about you and not be weak. They aren't mutually exclusive."

She crossed her arms. "Oh, that's rich. You're _concerned_ about me?"

"Asuka, I think you want to murder Samson. Is that not something to be concerned about? When he's back there giving us running support?"

"Are you saying I can't control myself?" she snapped.

"I'm just saying that you look angry, you want to talk, and I want to listen!" Shinji said, irritably. "It doesn't always have to be an argument!"

"Why can't it just be that I'm right and you agree with me!?"

"Because sometimes you aren't, and I don't want you to regret it!"

"That's…just…_stop making sense_!" she screamed, tugging at her hair. Shinji relaxed into his crash couch, rubbing his forehead.

"Do you want to go get milkshakes after this? And you can scream at me then?" Shinji asked. Asuka stopped pulling her hair, and looked at him suspsiscouly.

"…Maybe. Maybe…I'm still angry, though."

"Be angry at the thing that's about to squish us," Shinji said, not feeling particularly amused by his joke.

"…You're paying."

"I'm…fine, I'm paying."

"Can I come, too?" Asuka and Shinji both yelped and almost crawled up on top of their respective couches when Rei's image popped up.

"How…were you listening to us?!" Asuka demanded.

"Your link was open," she told the girl. Asuka glanced down at her comm board, seeing her outbound comms were still connected to 00. "I've never had a milkshake. Can I come?"

Asuka relaxed onto the couch. "Yes," she said, somehow feeling more comfortable with the three of them together rather than just her and Shinji. "Yes. But no Samson."

"It's not really fair if—" Shinji began.

"_No! Samson!_" Asuka hunched over her connection with him, filling his pickup with her snarling visage.

"…no Samson," Shinji agreed. At that, Misato's face punched in on all of them.

"Do you know how long I've been trying to get through to you!?" she raged. "New coordinates! The initial telemetry was off. Move! Now!"


	30. The Press

An object falling from orbit had very little time to actually stay in the air, but the Twelfth Angel seemed to linger in the sky for a surprisingly long time. It's trajectory also changed, sending all four Evas bouncing and flitting from one optimal point to the next.

"AT Fields have an affect on mass and displacement, right?" Cooper asked, watching the antics on the board.

"Yes," Ibuki said. "That has to be what we're seeing. That thing up there is using it's AT Field to try and 'steer' by adjusting it's mass. Too light one minute, too heavy the next."

"Why is this taking so long!?" Asuka's voice raged over the speakers, the sound becoming gravelly for a moment. Cutting under her voice was the same, consistent babble-talk that had first signaled the arrival of the Eleventh Angel.

"Just keep moving, and don't stop," Misato ordered. "There'll be a point when it can't play this game anymore and physics will take over." She looked at Ibuki. "Physics _will_ take over, right?"

The younger woman shrugged.

Misato rubbed her temple. Cooper began cursing. "No, no, no…God…damn…ma'am, the power feed to Grendel is fluctuating." It took her a moment to understand what he was saying. She whirled on Aoba.

"The other Evas! Where are their power levels at?"

"They have a consistent and steady feed," he reported, "But we're watching it." Misato shook her head. The Eleventh Angel…was it coordinating with the Twelfth Angel?

"HQ, this is Grendel," Samson reported, his masked face appearing on the board. "Power levels have dropped below optimal performance standards. Emergency battery has kicked on, the two-minute timer has started."

"Put as much distance between you and the possible crash-down sites as you can," Asuka said. "There's nothing else you can do."

"Roger that. Moving." The IFF of Grendel sprang away even further from the other three than it already had been. It was then that Aoba looked up.

"Unit-00 is starting to indicate power drainage."

* * *

"Balthasar is completely off-line," one of the techs reported. "Melchior is starting to cascade."

"And Casper?" Ritsuko asked.

"…Casper hasn't been touched. The firewall is holding strong." Ritsuko nodded. It was a desperate ploy, but a working one: she knew that at least two nodes out of three for MAGI would be an acceptable loss ratio, considering that all three were needed to access the most fundamental of Nerv's processes…like the self-destruct protocols. She picked one of the two cores to invest all of her efforts in, and had the techs creating backalleys, dead ends, firewalls, and every form of protection they could throw together in order to prevent a total systems failure. In the meantime, Ritsuko was trying to form a counterattack.

Rather than attack the Angel, it had been decided to completely abandon Sigma Unit to it the Angel, which had ceased its growth in order to focus on dominating the HQ through its computer systems. That was Ritsuko's field, and she refused to be beaten on it.

"Okay, let's see," she mumbled, going over the initial process of the attack. "It shows a weakness to ozone, we pump in ozone, it adapts and prospers on it. We tried lowering the temperature, that didn't work. Vacuum, it actually seemed to _enjoy_ that." The base shuddered with a dull boom as another piece of the Twelfth Angel above fell. All external approaches to dealing with the Angel threat had failed.

What about an internal approach?

It was a colony of microorganisms. Very adaptable, but nothing was so adaptable as to be invincible. There was a catch in that somewhere. She closed her eyes, thinking of human efforts previously to deal with invasive or destructive colonies. She thought of ants, of locusts. External threats always hit the outside edges, but the core remained strong. If you weakened the core…

A shocking thought came to her. The thought of fungus. She knew of a fungus, the entire existence of which was based upon a symbiotic relationship with particular species of ant. The fungus would infect the ant, forcing it to undergo severe behavior changes until, in time, the ant would climb as high as it was physical able, dig its mandibles into whatever surface it was on, and die as the fungus sprouted from its head. Entire colonies could be destroyed by such a thing…especially those that dragged the bodies of the dead back.

She had to make the Angel kill itself.

"I need to get to into Casper," she said, standing up. "You, you, and you," she said, pointing to three startled technicians. "I need you with me. I have an idea."

* * *

As the Angel began its final descent, the power for all three Evas cut simultaneously. Their batteries began, and the countdown timer started. Misato's eyebrow twitched in agitation as she observed the blip of 00 arrive at the touchdown point first, 01 close on its heels. That Angel would be down in thirty seconds…which would leave a minute thirty to do…something. And judging from the imagery, that something was…

This was the biggest Angel they had yet dealt with and Misato had no clue as to what they were going to do about it.

* * *

"I'm in position," Rei reported.

"I'm almost there. Five more seconds," Shinji added.

"Don't start without me," Asuka said. She was at least fifteen seconds out and closing. It was then the countdown timer for the Angel went from thirty seconds to ten. Misato tried to give a command, but her voice died on her lips. There was nothing to say right now: somehow, that Angel had decided to give them one last little problem and defied physics once again. It plummeted down, and Rei gave a strangled cry as her AT Field met the Angel's own well before the projected time.

"I'm here!" Shinji said, his blip joining with Rei's. Soon, his own sounds of exertion joined with Rei's as the combined AT Fields began to push back together. The Angel bore down. It ever bore down.

Shinji wanted to scream, but he felt too much pressure to do more than grind his teeth. The sympathetic resonance from the Eva, the pressed AT Field…it was having as much a physical toll on him as it was the Eva. He stared up at a single, baleful eye, one that could consume the whole Eva in the center iris and still have room. Across from him, the blue frame of Unit-00 shuddered with strain of its own. The world around them was red, and the very ground was cracking, breaking, becoming like liquid from the intense pressure.

And like that, Unit-02 was there. "Hang on!" Asuka said, her Eva gazing up.

"Hurry…up!" Shinji gasped. The Eva continued to stare, as the pressure built. What was she doing? She was right there! They needed that AT Field, now!

"It won't work…" he heard Asuka murmur.

"What…won't…"

"I'm attacking. Don't let up!" she snapped. The Progressive Knife appeared in her Eva's fist, and before Shinji could protest, Unit-02 had burst straight up into the air like a missile. Her own AT Field collided with the still strong one of the Angels, and Shinji felt _new_ pressure as Asuka's field began conflicting with his and Rei's.

"Asuka, what are you doing!?" Misato screamed. "Stick to the plan!"

"We…wouldn't…" she tried to say. She gasped. "Push…me!"

"What?"

"Use…your…fields…push!" she managed. Shinji realized what she was saying as Rei did, and the two of them merged their fields _beneath_ Asuka, squeezing her between their field and the Angel's. Slowly, painfully, 02 pressed forward, the AT Fields shimmering and glowing from the contact, the armor on 02 itself beginning to heat from the pressure. Shinji screamed when Rei and Asuka did, the last vestige of effort they could manage.

And then the pressure wasn't there anymore. It was as though a line had snapped, and Shinji could breathe again. Above, Asuka drove through the eye and began hacking up into the Angel, seeking the core.

"She…she did it!" Misato cheered over the comms. "Oh, my God, fifteen seconds left and she did it! She's got the core!" Shinji blinked, and looked at the countdown timer. It was at thirteen…twelve…eleven. Had they really been that close? _Oh my God that was close_, his mind began repeating, both fear and a giddy sense of exhilaration taking him.

Speaking of close…

He looked up into the gash Asuka's Eva had vanished into, LCL pouring from it in torrents. "What…happens when it…?" he started to say, and then the world became as light, and Shinji knew no more.

* * *

Hands were on his arms. The voices around him were muffled, incoherent. The world was dark, then gray, then too bright. Shinji grumbled, shaking himself loose, and almost following. The hands stayed secured, but he got his feet under him. "Let me go," he said, and then fell forward on his face. When he opened his eyes again, he was in the back of an ambulance. Asuka sat across from him, shuddering under a blanket and holding something in her hand that dripped. He focused on it, and realized it had been a paper cup of water. She had crushed it in her fist.

"Are…you okay?" he asked.

"Do I look okay?" she managed between gritted teeth. The crumpled cup in her clenched hand continued to dribble water.

"Just…concerned," he mumbled. "Why did you…?" He pointed at the cup. She looked at it, remembering its presence.

"I was trying to drink water," she said. "Results are…still coming in." She couldn't relax her fist, and was reduced to shaking her hand futilely, trying to loosen her grip on the cup. With his own fingers trembling, Shinji reached out and managed to pry her palm open enough to let the paper fall out. The fist clenched again, and Asuka murmured, "Thank you."

Shinji looked to his left as Rei walked up to join them, looking no worse for wear. All she had as a single medic gently resting a hand on her shoulder. Then she turned and began walking in a random direction, and the medic gently steered her back towards the other two. She made it about five more feet before veering again. The medic managed to guide her to a seat, and ease her down on it. The girl stared straight ahead, not saying a word.

"Rei?" Shinji asked. She didn't respond. "Rei?"

"Wonder girl?" Asuka said. Rei's head slowly, carefully turned towards Asuka. She opened her mouth, and tried to speak, but her teeth were chattering too hard for her to get words out.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Angel died. We were under it. It looks like a wasteland out there," Asuka murmured. Shinji glanced out the back and blinked. He had been so focused on the girls that he had missed the forest for the trees. The formerly green ground where they had made their stand was black and smoking for as far as the eye could see, with emergency vehicles and personnel littering the space. The distinct blood scent of LCL was in the air, but there was none on the ground. That was very odd to Shinji, but he couldn't focus on it, couldn't process the though. Unit-02 was not too far away, face down but not seeming any worse for wear. If it was fine, then Units-00 and 01 had to be fine, as well.

"How did we not die?" Shinji marveled.

"W-w-w-w-e-e-e-e-e w-w-w-e-e-e-r-r-r-e-e-e…" Rei stuttered. Asuka held up a hand, still clenched in a fist.

"Please stop. Hurting…that hurts my head," Asuka asked, too tired to say anything especially mean. Someone slapped the side of the ambulance, and all of them jumped. Samson then appeared between the doors.

"That was something, German," he said, his hands at his side and his smile cool. "I may have to reassess my opinion of you." Asuka didn't look at him, but focused on Shinji. The skin around her jaw twitched, and the clenched fist was now shaking. "Hello to you, too. How are you doing, First Child?" She turned to face him, chattered something unintelligible, and said no more.

"Eloquent. And you?"

"I fell on my face," Shinji offered. "My nose hurts."

"That's…good."

"Yeah. I can't feel anything else, but I can feel my nose. It hurts."

"Well…what a…victorious bunch of heroes you guys are," he said in a teasing voice. "I salute you all. I'll leave you to it. Let you recover. Afterward, how about something in the cafeteria, brother? So as not to see what else Misato decides to punish you with?" Shinji didn't have to look at Asuka to feel her eyes practically pleading with him.

"They want to keep us for a bit, I think," Shinji said. "Another time?"

"Another time, brother," Samson said. He gave a mocking half-salute, and disappeared.

"'Brother?'" Asuka asked. Shinji turned back to her.

"He just started calling me that," Shinji said. "What's it matter to you?"

"'Hey, bro, how's it hanging? Word up, G, you da man! You da man!'" Asuka said in a deep, taunting voice, pumping her arms in motion. She then sat very still.

"What, is that it?" Shinji asked.

"I…hurt…something. Talking like…that…" She slowly lowered her arms, looking pitiful all of a sudden. Shinji sighed, and looked at Rei. She glanced up, small tremors forming in her hands.

"Wait here," Shinji said. He tried to step out of the ambulance, and instead fell to the ground. The driver, who had been walking up to close the door, hurried over.

"Kid, are you okay?" she asked.

"I'm fine," he said, getting his hands under him. "I was wanting to see if we could stop for milkshakes."

"Great, a joker. You could have hurt yourself," she said, helping him into a seating position.

"I'm not joking. I…look, I promised the other two Pilots in there milkshakes, and I was hoping…you could take us somewhere where we could get some. On the way back, is all."

"You do realize Tokyo-3 is empty, right? Where are you gonna get milkshakes right now?"

"Then…take me to one of the cafeterias at HQ." He then sat up, remembering something. Something important. "Did they…do something about that Angel in the base?"

"Last I heard," the driver said, lifting him to his feet. "They did something, the details of which eludes me. Either way, that Angel has been reported defeated."

"Oh…good…" Shinji thought. "So…there's still a cafeteria, right?"

"…Yes, there's still a cafeteria," the driver murmured. Shinji looked at her patiently, his eyes wide and watery. They were wide because he was focusing on the general outline of her face, as the rest was too blurry. It had the effect of making him look like a small, excited puppy. The driver sighed, shrugged, and said, "All right. All right, I'll take you by one of the cafeterias. There'll be no one there, either."

"That's okay," he said. "We appreciate it." He turned to climb back into the ambulance, but found the step stubbornly continued to pull away from him with each attempt. The driver put her hands under his arms and gave him a shove on his fourth attempt, pushing him up and into the bay. He teetered for a moment, before collapsing into his seat. He glanced at Asuka, then Rei as the driver closed the door.

"I can't believe you just did that, Baka," she said incredulously.

"I promised you milkshakes," he mumbled.

"Real milkshakes. Like…from an ice-cream parlor. With sprinkles and stuff."

"I bet they have sprinkles in the cafeteria," he insisted.

"This isn't getting you off the hook. You are taking me…and…Rei," she extended her fist to the girl. "To a real ice-cream parlor, and buying us real milkshakes. With your money."

"I will!" he snapped. "Stop being so pushy!"

"Just don't forget," she grumped. She shook her head. "You really are stupid, you know that?"

"I have to be, if I keep doing nice things for you," he mumbled. His eyes met Asuka's, a little defiant but not challenging. She gazed back, not turning away. She sighed.

"Thank you…for doing that. Even though it was…pretty stupid."

"Th-th-there are…s…s…supposed to be…ch…cherries…on top. R…right?" Rei mumbled, her tremors having subsided.

"Oh, you grace us with your conversation," Asuka said. "Of course there can be. You can put whatever you want in it!"

"N…n…not…anything…" Rei mumbled. The driver had gotten into the front cab by this point, and the ambulance had started.

"Really? What can't you put in a milkshake?" Asuka insisted.

"Rocks," Shinji suggested, without a trace of mockery in his voice. He was too rattled to make jokes, and thought it was an honest question.

"S-s-s-sand," Rei added.

"Broken glass," Shinji continued, .

"I mean, like food…wait, you know what…never mind. Forget that I asked," Asuka grumped. The rest of the ride was in silence, but Asuka did spy Shinji smiling in something like satisfaction. She made a face at him, but said no more.

* * *

When Ritsuko entered Misato's office, the woman was nowhere to be found. She checked her phone again. Misato said to meet her in the office, so that's where she had headed. Ritsuko walked in, and decided to sit and wait. As soon as she closed the door behind her, she heard a shuffle from the desk. Furrowing her brows, she circled around, to see that Misato had folded herself up under the desk with a bag of ice on her head.

"Um…well…this is new," the older woman observed.

"I'm hiding," Misato grumbled. "I just need…a moment. A moment is all."

"Where are the kids?"

"They're in one Cafeteria D-22. I'm not saying anything…they earned some disobedience today."

"Is there anyone _in_ D-22 right now?"

"_They_ are."

"I mean like servers or…" Misato gave her a meaningful glance, and Ritsuko nodded. "It's just, you know…mild breaking and entering, light damage to Nerv property. Possible theft."

"Shh…" Misato raised a finger to her lips. "There's no one here that cares right now."

"Don't you want to hear how I killed an Angel?"

"No."

"I tricked it into killing itself. Because I'm quite clever like that. Found some things in Casper that might help us really get some mileage out of MAGI." Misato continued to sit with her eyes closed. Ritsuko sniffed, and squatted next to her friend. "So…this is…what?"

"I'm being made a Major," Misato whispered.

"Congrats!" Ritsuko said happily. Misato opened one eye and stared balefully at her. "I mean…boo? Hiss? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I am _happy_ to be a Major," she murmured. "I am _exhausted_ by nearly having died today."

"I'm quite invigorated," Ritsuko said. "I killed an Angel."

"I know, you've told me," Misato mumbled. She sighed, shaking her head. "I nearly killed the kids today."

"Yeah, you nearly did." There was no malice in the words, but Misato still had to glance at Ritsuko to get the general feel of them.

"We had…no warning. No warning at all. How does something like…that…elude us? You saw how big it was! It just…out of nowhere! And don't get me started on how it went out: if it had just _vaporized_ like that, we'd have LCL contaminating the ground." She sat up quickly, nearly banging her head on the desk. "And the Eleventh Angel! What was up with _that_? Have you determined the infection point?"

"Still tracing it down, but it was definitely the new node we installed."

"They always came in ones. Never twos. What changed? Were they…did they coordinate with each other?" Ritsuko began to sense the source of Misato's turmoil.

"If they did, then things have gotten more precarious than they already are," Ritsuko agreed.

"We have trouble dealing with them one at a time. And today…we were _lucky_ that we handled it the way we did. We were lucky the Americans had their own computer system that didn't rely on protein disks, we were lucky it didn't crap out on us, and we were lucky…_lucky_…that Asuka…behaved today."

"She didn't behave," Ritsuko said. "But she showed amazing initiative."

"Are you sure it wasn't foolhardiness?" Misato asked.

"Misato, you're the Ops Director. You tell me."

"…She did very well today," Misato decided. "Exceptionally well. It was almost like a different person was out there, today." She hummed to herself, leaning on her hands. "If this is the pattern of how things are, then…we might pull together. This might become something different. If this was a fluke today, though…" She said nothing more.

"Let's go get a drink and celebrate your promotion," Ritsuko offered. Misato nodded, unfolding out from under the desk. The concern did not stay behind, and followed her out of the office and through the evening. It was lingering.

* * *

Ritsuko's discovery of the worm did not go unnoticed. A final failsafe within the program kicked back a warning, indicating the possibility that the code walls it had been hiding in had been tampered with. Examined. Mined.

It was possible for the source to be traced. As such, the Group held an emergency meeting to discuss possible courses of action. There were nine men in the central Committee, enough for a tie-breaker vote if need be. They had been sitting in the board room in relative silence, reading the report from the worm on tablets set before them. A portly man coughed, and said, "Mr. Graves said all loose ends had been tied."

"Mr. Petal warned us of this possibility," the Drinking Man added. "It was a door. Doors swing both ways, we all knew that."

"Have they found out anything, is the question," the Smoking Man murmured. The Portly Man shifted in his seat, turning to the man next to him. The Thin Man shook his head.

"It would take some time to dissect the virus. Even with MAGI and the mind of Dr. Akagi…there would be some time."

"So…what do we do?" an electronic voice box buzzed.

"I suggest…we abandon the 'live and let live' policy," the only bald man present said.

The Voiceless Man countered, "Target Seele? Directly?"

"Only the American assets," the Bald Man continued. "Mr. Graves has kept track on the two members of Seele's central council here in the United States. Both scientists. They do have some pull with industrial and economic leaders."

"No politicians. I can't tell if that's clever or foolish," the Smoking Man mused.

"The UN's expanded power told them otherwise," the Portly Man sniffed. "They backed a horse, it just wasn't _our_ horse."

"Their loss," the Smoking Man said with a shrug.

"Regardless, their identities are known to us, as are their subordinates and assets," the Bald Man asserted. "We've been monitoring them for some time."

"Monitoring and gaining for it," the Voiceless Man buzzed. "If we liquidate them, we lose the intelligence assets that gives us. Think of how deep we penetrated Seele based upon what we knew about these two."

"And we know that while Lorenz has deduced we exist, he doesn't _know,_" a Short Man murmured. "We kill the council members here…well, then he'll know."

"And not be be able to act," the Drinking Man said. "We wouldn't just hit the council members, you know. We would take down the entire apparatus. Everyone we consider a risk."

"Do we actually have the ability to do that?" the Portly Man asked.

"I wouldn't so if we didn't," the Drinking Man said, surprised. "I've had teams in place ready to wipe the whole list at the first word."

"Without telling us?" the Short Man asked.

"In my colleagues defense," the Smoking Man interjected, "That _is_ his specialty."

"Fair enough," the Short Man murmured, retreating from the subject. The Bald Man leaned forward.

"If we take them down, would Seele know about it?"

"Of course," the Drinking Man said. "The question is, would they be able to _do_ anything about it. I can garauntee that they will not. And what's more, we'll have our assets still in place."

"What's to prevent them from moving against those assets?" the Voiceless Man asked.

"The fact that Gendo Ikari and the council do not get along," the Drinking Man said. "Nerv-Japan is slowly becoming an isolated community within the greater Seele network."

"I don't remember that information being present in our current intelligence assessments," the Short Man mused.

"You have to read between the lines," the Smoking Man said. "It's there, however. I bet my reputation on it."

"He hasn't been wrong before," the Thin Man murmured, gesturing at the Smoking Man.

"Hmm…" the Portly Man rumbled. He sniffed. "What about the American branch of Nerv?"

"Thanks to us? A vestigial organ. An appendix and nothing more. We've pushed so many of their resources into DARPA that the most they can do is monitor for incoming Angels. If they think they can hit us with that, they've made a mistake." The Smoking Man slumped in his chair, emphasizing his indifference.

"Don't be arrogant…"

"There's not arrogance about it," he insisted. "Besides, what if they should try to act? We've been playing this game for decades. Seele is good, but they're late to the game."

The Portly Man made a dismissive noise. "I think we should put this to a vote now. All those in favor of liquidating the American branch of Seele, vote aye. All those opposed, nay." Each man placed his thumb on the table, over a spot indicative of his vote. The Portly Man studied his tablet. "Six in favor, three opposing. The ayes have it." He pointed a finger at the Drinking Man. "If you can't be discreet, be messy. Let them know they're in the fight." If they discovered they were being targeted, they'd clamp up, and it would be harder to infiltrate them. However, if the purge was carried out…ruthlessly…paranoia and fear would work into the clamp down. That would ensure that, for all their security precautions, they would still make mistakes. Jump at shadows. Twitch and jitter.

"Messy, I can do," the Drinking Man agreed.


	31. Ingredient

Three days following the dual assault on Nerv, Kaji met with a contact from Public Security. It was in a construction site that was currently closed down for the week. Kaji had to exercise more tradecraft than usual in traveling to the meet, and by the time he arrived, he was mentally jumpy and a little testy.

"Anything yet?" he asked the short man after the exchange of pass codes.

"Still nothing on the boy," the man said. "Though we have found some interesting things on Grendel."

"Schematics and the like? We've got plenty of those," Kaji said. "We have access to it's armory and kits, and Dr. Akagi took enough passive readings off of it to give us a full-scale internal schematic."

"This is a little more obtuse than that. Did you know someone died in the creation of it?"

"…Huh?"

The small man handed him a folder. Inside, Kaji found a photo of an attractive young woman, posing for an ID picture. Chestnut hair, young features, pretty. Behind it was a list of her qualifications. Alice Wessup, graduated from MIT, hired on with DARPA as an assistant researcher…there was a lot of gray areas, though.

And a time of death, listed two years ago. He looked at her date of birth: pre-Impact. Something was off about that date.

"This is a false time of death," Kaji guessed.

"Mm-hmm," his contact said. "It took a hell of a lot to suss out the real story. See, the thing is, everybody talks. You find the right person, you get the details. She was the only casualty of Grendel's production, and they didn't want it coming out. Would look bad, see."

"What happened?"

"Still trying to figure out; might have something to do with the cover up. Suffice to say that the woman there died in some integral part of Grendel's construction, and the people involved felt it was important to hide that fact. There's something in there about that, my friend. Not much, but a possible angle. I mean, people die on big projects a lot. Accidents, all that. Why hide it like this?"

Kaji leaned back. Gendo Ikari's wife died in the construction of Unit-01. A failed contact experiment, they said. His expression was thoughtful, but his thoughts were confused.

Was the experiment really a failure? He felt queasy, all of a sudden, but didn't know why. There was something lingering at the edge of his understanding, and this coincidence was the reason. He knew nothing of 00's activation, but he knew 02's activation was sufficiently traumatic enough to do severe damage to the researcher in that. That was…

He made a face. He didn't like coincidences, and this one had become very, _very_ large.

"Any relation between this woman and Samson Creed?"

"None that we can tell," his contact mused. "Are you thinking there is?"

"Maybe…maybe not. See if resources can be diverted to that end."

"Sure," the man promised. Kaji pondered in silence for a few minutes, wondering at the phantom thought that hung just out of reach.

* * *

Asuka stirred the chocolate milkshake, making a sour face. Shinji was trying to figure out why as Rei greedily but cautiously drank hers through the straw. The first time she had ever had a chocolate shake, she had not been prepared for how _sweet_ it was, and had given herself a headache. She had a bit more respect for it, now. Just a bit.

"What? I…I bought you and Rei real chocolate shakes. Like I promised," Shinji said. They were sitting in an ice-cream parlor not far from Misato's apartment. The woman had given them the okay to go and get some milkshakes. Rei had met them here, driven by a Security man.

"They aren't as good as the ones you made. You've ruined milkshakes for me," she grumbled. Rei stayed out of the conversation, having abandoned the straw and resorted to using a spoon to fish out the remains.

"I'm…sorry?"

"You should be. This is a simple pleasure in life. Something I should be able to fall back on when I need a little pick me up, and now it's gone." She scoffed, resting her chin on her hands. "I swear to God, you ruin everything."

"I've made you a milkshake, now I'm about to _pay_ for _that_ milkshake. Can you not enjoy it just for a bit and stop finding things to blame me for?" Shinji asked.

"I think I'm going to get another one," Rei said, her spoon clinking at the bottom of the glass.

"You'll make yourself sick," Shinji said.

"I doubt it," Rei answered, kicking off the chair and heading up to the counter. Asuka trailed her with her eyes, and turned back to Shinji. He was looking at Asuka, with an expression of naked exasperation. Her mouth set, and she glared right back. For a moment, the two children sat quietly, each trying to push the other down with their gaze. Finally, Shinji picked the cherry off the top of his milkshake and laid it on a napkin. He looked up at Asuka. "Why do you Pilot?" he asked.

"That's a dumb question."

"It's only dumb if I already know the answer," Shinji said testily. "Why do you Pilot?"

Asuka shifted on her chair. "What, did you ask Rei? Or Samson?" She squinted at him.

"Yes." That caught her off guard, and she leaned back.

"To exhibit my talent to the world. Why else?" She returned to stirring the milkshake. Why did this taste so bland when compared to what Shinji made? She frowned at it, willing the drink to taste better. She sipped at it, and muttered. Still bland.

"Hmm…" Shinji pondered.

"Just 'hmm?' Is that all? Well, why do you do it?" Shinji snickered at that, and Asuka felt like he was mocking her. "Did I just tell a joke?"

"No, it's just…my reasons keep changing." He scratched his head. "When I was first doing it, I…you know how it feels to be praised?"

"Of course," Asuka said. _Sometimes_, a little voice reminded her. She mentally waved it away.

"I…I first started because I wanted to hear that from my father. I wanted my father to praise me."

"What a stupid reason."

"I know, right?" Shinji laughed, and Asuka blinked. No wilting? No…moping? "It _was_ a stupid reason," he continued, "I mean, I haven't even…I just haven't thought much about him for a while. I'm still Piloting, though."

"So, why?" she asked.

"I…Samson told me the reason why he Piloted was because he was 'good at it.' I think he may have meant something else, actually, but…" Shinji shook his head. "It made me wonder why _I_ do it. Why I Pilot…and I realized I don't really care that much what my father thinks, now."

"Bravo for you," Asuka mumbled. The talk about Samson was starting to irritate her. "What's the point?"

"I'm good at it, aren't I?"

"Wh…huh?" Asuka blinked in surprise. Why did he always have to ask her these things?

"I'm good at Piloting, right?" he repeated.

"Where the hell did Rei go, she's taking a _real_ long time…" Asuka murmured, turning away. She swallowed, feeling nervous as Shinji's eyes bore into her. She glanced back at him. He raised an eyebrow. "Yes. You are. Is that what you want to hear?" she asked.

"We're all good at it," he said. "It's…I feel like it gives me meaning. You know? Like it's something I was _supposed_ to do. I can't explain it." He looked at the cherry he had set aside, and dropped it onto Asuka's shake. "I don't like it, and it still scares me…but I'd hate not being able to do it. I don't know…"

"Why'd you do that?"

"What?" Shinji looked at Asuka. She had the strangest look on her face.

"That!" She pointed at the cherry like it was an intruder.

"Um…you like them, don't you?" he asked, confused by the gesture.

"Rei was the one talking about cherries, why not give it to her?"

"Do you not _like_ cherries?" Shinji asked, confused.

"…I do," Asuka grumbled, looking away.

"Are…you _blushing_?"

"Rei, what took you so long!?" Asuka snapped as the girl reappeared with a fresh shake. Rei gave Asuka an unreadable expression.

"I was trying samples," she said, the tone confused. "They let you do that."

"How many flavors did you try?" Asuka asked, too loudly.

"All of them. I think pistachio is my favorite…orange sorbet was fairly tasty, as well. It was a difficult choice," Rei said, taking her seat again. "I had to try each a couple of times. I still can't decide."

"I'm glad you;re back," Asuka mumbled under her breath.

"What?" Rei asked, genuinely surprised. Asuka looked up, and stammered.

"Shinji's…over here…talking about Samson! And I said no Samson today. It's a violation of the rules!" Rei blinked and glanced at Shinji. The look she gave him made him feel defensive, for some reason.

"I was talking about you, too," he said, and immediately regretted saying it.

"What were you saying about me?" Rei asked, curious. Shinji sputtered, having leapt from one trap into another one. Asuka inadvertently saved him by making a loud sound of irritation.

"What did you do?" she demanded. "I have to know, why do these shakes taste so bland compared to yours? What's the secret?"

"I'm curious, as well," Rei said. "These are very good but…they don't taste the same."

"They probably don't have vanilla extract in them," Shinji said, with a shrug.

"Vanilla extract…that's it?" Asuka looked at her milkshake in wonder.

"Yeah, I…that's what I always use when making a shake."

"…huh." That was surprisingly simple, Asuka thought. Grumbling, she stood up. "Go ahead and pay, Shinji. We're going back to the apartment, and you're going to make more shakes."

"You've barely touched the one I already ordered for you!" he snapped. She popped the cherry into her mouth.

"There. Satisfied? Let's go." She turned and marched out the door, leaving Shinji gaping in her wake. He turned back to Rei, looking for some sort of support.

"…for once, I find myself agreeing with the Second Child," Rei said, an almost guilty note in her voice. Despite that, she still carried the shake over to the counter, asking for a to-go cup. Shinji sighed, and followed her up to the register.

* * *

"They're getting impatient," Colin hissed. Samson didn't acknowledge the statement, instead delivering a four-strike combo to the heavy bag. Colin sniffed, irritated at being ignored. It was like having a drill run out of batteries on you. Tools were not supposed to be willful.

"Are you any closer to finding that thing you were sent to find?"

"I have some theories," Samson murmured, delivering a flurry of strikes.

"Anything more concrete?"

"Did they send you to make Nerv suspicious? Because if you keep asking these questions, that's what will happen."

"Where's…Adam?"

Samson laid his hands on the bag, slowing its swinging. "I've no idea."

"Not even an inkling?"

"I believe that Gendo Ikari may know where it is."

"Well, that's a start. Perhaps you should ask him…

"He's not the talkative type."

"…But the son is." Samson turned and gave Colin a very blunt look. "I would not be looking at me like that," the doctor said.

"The boy is off-limits," he said. "Those were my orders."

"Maybe the father has confided something in him…"

"You clearly are out of your depth here, Doctor," Samson said, shaking his head. "Have you seen the relationship between the two of them? There is none. None whatsoever. Do you think a secret like _that_ would be something Gendo would share with Shinji?"

"First name basis, now, are we?" Colin asked. Samson smirked.

"He's an interesting individual."

Colin shrugged. "Seems like kind of pansy to me."

"You would know, wouldn't you?"

"Oh, yeah. I was picked on in school. Bad skin, all that. And yet, here I stand, not vindictive in the least." He made a grasping motion. "But I can be difficult to work with. You don't want that, my boy, you don't."

"The boy," Samson hissed, "has a core of strength to him. He is a unique individual. He is something special."

"What about the girl? The redhead? Don't swing that way?"

"The girl is trash. Irrelevant. Though I have to admit, she can be quite wily at times."

"And the blue-haired shrinking violet? Nothing there?"

"Irrelevant."

"Just Shinji? You know, I'm kind of curious now. This kid is starting to sound interesting to me." Samson sniffed, using the heel of his hand to scratch his forehead. Colin adjusted his glasses, and pointed at Samson. "We're going to have a chat like this. Every day. Every day, you're going to tell me how much _closer_ you are to finding Adam, and I will not have to tell our mutual benefactors what a waste of time it was sending you here. That would hurt me, Samson. That really would. You are my greatest achievement, and you reflect upon _me_. Understand?"

"…I understand, Doctor." Colin nodded in satisfaction, and left. Samson followed him with his eyes, long after the little man had left the gym.


	32. Rattle

Gendo Ikari sat in a darkened room, joined by four other men. Their spots were marked by colors, bright and garish in the black. There were six places.

One was empty.

"We have a problem," the French Representative said, his face bathed in yellow. Gendo felt eyes on him, flicked his own to the empty green place. A 'problem' was a mute understatement. One of the members of the Human Instrumentality Committee had been murdered. As had the other American member of the Seele central council. There were other deaths, too. Large swathes of Seele's infrastructure in the States had simply vanished, individuals disappearing in subtle (or not so subtle) ways. War had been declared.

"I can see that," Gendo said, patiently. "Where is our American colleague?"

"Don't play games, Ikari!" Lorenz snapped. "You know damned well he's dead. As is our other council member in the States. This outside actor has taken direct action against us!"

"So why not hit back? Why come to me about it?" Gendo asked, with just a hint of irritation. Let them think on that.

"We may need to advance our timetable," Lorenz said.

"The conditions are not right," Gendo said.

"We will determine when and what conditions are optimal," the Russian Representative said, reflected in blue. "You will do as you're told. Just because you've been entrusted with Terminal Dogma does not mean you have the authority to make plans as you see fit."

"My plans are the plans of the Committee. They always have been, and will remain so up until the moment of Instrumentality." Which was true enough, Gendo reasoned.

"I'm sure," Lorenz murmured, and Gendo studied him across the table. The old man was unreadable behind his visor, but Gendo knew that Lorenz knew there was rebellion. What's more, Lorenz knew that _Gendo_ knew of his suspicions. They all knew, and they all refused to act. At least, act immediately. These things took time…one move against the other.

This thing in America, though, was unexpected. It had seemingly come out of nowhere, for no reason whatsoever. Only Gendo knew the reason: the worm. It had to be connected to Dr. Akagi's discovery of the worm. He kept that to himself, though: the Committee didn't need to know that just yet…

"I take it that Nerv will be removed from American soil?"

"On what grounds? That we've lost Seele influence? The Americans don't know about Seele, they don't need to know," the British Representative snapped, baleful in red. Gendo said nothing, waiting.

"Where does my branch come into it?" Gendo asked.

"Double your surveillance on the Americans," the French Representative said. "Watch the boy. Don't give them room to breathe. They've crippled our eye on them, and they are in our camp, that is certain. We must close the walls. Tighten in. And anyone we find who may be mildly treachorous…will be removed."

"I see," Gendo said. "I understand." At that, the British Representative vanished. Then the Russian, and then the Frenchman. Lorenz remained.

"Remember, Ikari," he said, "We are men with filled with the purpose of grand vision. We will allow nothing to stand in our way. It is for the soul of humanity that we fight." Gendo detected the double-meaning again, the veiled threat. He said nothing in response, and Lorenz vanished. Gendo stood, studying the table, and turned to leave the dark room.

_So_, he mused, _the old men are scared_.

* * *

Asuka tapped her foot, glaring up at Unit-02. It had been removed from it's LCL tank for basic maintenance, and was perched on its launch platform. Technicians swarmed over it, checking for stress fractures in the armor, possible lesions in the tissue. Everything that could impair her ability to function. Asuka liked to be present when this was happening, to make sure none of them screwed up the process. Not that a fourteen-year-old girl had much sway in what happened around her, but it just made her feel better to give the death-eye to all plebeians that dared touch her precious Unit-02.

Besides, she needed a distraction.

_It was just a stupid cherry_, she thought. She grumbled to herself, and thought for the upteenth time that she should just go to Hikari and piss and moan about it. And for the upteenth time, she didn't. It was just too weird. She was putting more stock on the whole thing than she cared to, and she was going to let the topic rest.

But she didn't.

_Baka…idiot…moron…sissy-boy…stanglemurderdeathkill. _If only there was some constructive way to vent her frustrations, but she had yet to find one.

"It's quite red, isn't it, German?"

_MurderdeathkillburnpillageslaughterEVERYLIVINGTHIN GEVER_, she repeated, her toe tapping ceasing instantly. "Go away."

"Just wanted to see the Unit-02 up a little closer. It's impressive…primitive, but impressive."

"Shut up," she snapped, turning and glaring hatefully at Samson. For once, he was actually wearing civilian clothing. She didn't know where he had gotten them, but the style wasn't bad. He looked halfway normal now. Oddly, though, the effect merely made him all that more of a target in her eyes.

"I only speak truth," he said, his voice laughing but his face composed. She turned and thrust a finger into his face.

"I…don't…care. I hate you, you know that? I _didn't_ like you when you came here, I _distrusted_ you while you've been here, and I outright _hate_ you right now. Don't talk to me, understand?"

"Except on the field, of course," he almost purred.

"That has nothing to do with now," she hissed. "You stay away from me. And stay away from Shinji."

"Jealous, are we?" Samson asked. "That's actually why I'm here. I want to discuss our mutual acquaintance?"

"Why would I possibly want to talk to you about Shinji?"

He shrugged. "_You _are the one getting possessive about him. Does Asuka Langley Soryu have little girly feelings about some boy with pretty eyes or something?" She recoiled, her eyes dropping to the center of Samson's chest. It was a natural target area, and the motion was more defensive then bashful.

"I don't share my things," she said.

"He's a thing of yours? Ah?" Samson smiled at that. And then his face went ugly, and the grin became something less cordial. Despite herself, despite the presence of everyone around them, despite her deep and intense loathing of Samson, she felt afraid right there. That close, with not but an arm's length between them, she was sure she saw something few people ever did. Asuka didn't like it, and her hands half-rose in defense.

"You…are _poison_. You are a bad _influence_ on the boy. He has it in him to be something outstanding, and I have been _trying_ to show him that. But you are like a chisel, and you just keep poking away at him." He leaned over her, and stuck a finger in _her_ face. "If you keep chiseling, there is no _measure_ of what-"

Unit-02 roared.

Both of them jerked and stared up at the Eva. It had no power, the batteries had been removed for maintenance, but somehow…it was _moving_. It was just the head and one of the arms, and both twitched in a jerky, spasmodic motion, but it was clear that the head was focused on Asuka and the hand was reaching toward her.

Her love of 02 was outweighed by the sheer, animal part of her mind cowering in the face of something massive and angry. In this moment, it was common for a person to do one of four things: run away, fight back, posture, or submit. Asuka submitted, falling to her knees before the sight. Samson ran. He bolted towards the nearest exit, joining the rush of technicians and engineers quickly vacating the bay. As he did, the head and the arm tracked him. 02 roared again, the sound deafening Asuka, who felt her fear just barely subside enough for shock to take it's place. She watched the motion, watched Samson flee…and was amazed.

_Was it…trying to get…Samson?_ She shook her head, and stared at 02. For a moment, it strained, and then, the arm and head went limp, as though exhausted. Asuka tried to play the conversation with Samson through her dazed head again. The roar was…when he was in her face…pushing forward…threatening. And then 02 did something no Eva was supposed to...it moved of its own, somehow summoning just enough energy to try and lash out at him.

Did Unit-02 just try to protect her? Asuka's fear faded, and she stared at 02 in almost religious awe.

* * *

Samson stumbled down the hallways to the American barracks. He brushed by the MPs, American personnel, everyone. He found a door, and slipped into. He didn't know whose office this was, but he pushed up to the desk and leaned over it, shivering. He smelled urine, knew that he had emptied his bladder in terror. Pure, white terror. He had felt it in that moment. The red beast had caused it. It had made him afraid.

Raising both hands above his head, he slammed them down on the table. _The Itsy-Bitsy Spider_. He raised them again, and brought them down again. Again, the stupid nursery rhyme pushed itself to the front of his thoughts. It was always there, always there, always there.

_I was afraid!_

He shrieked, banging on the table compulsively now. The fiberglass cracked under the assault. He dug his hands under it, and hurled the heavy desk across the room. He grabbed a chair, and threw that as well. There was a dry erase board on the wall. Digging his fingers behind it, he ripped it from the wall and flung it. Everything he could grab, he took and pitched. He screamed, he raged, he foamed at the mouth and got spittle over his clothes and hair. For a few minutes, he was lost in his rage.

When the door opened again, he stood in the center of the destruction, almost serene. Ennis stepped carefully into the room.

"What…the _hell_…happened in here?" he asked. Samson didn't answer, but cracked a half-smile and shrugged. "I asked you a question, Captain!" Ennis snapped. Samson's head twitched, but he didn't answer. Ennis glanced down, having smelled the odor and seeing the stain on the front of Samson's pants. "Were you down in the Eva paddock when Unit-02…did whatever it was that it did?"

Samson's teeth bared for a moment, then relaxed into something like a smile. "Just walking through," he said. He flicked his eyes to the two Soldiers at Ennis' elbows. Wiping his face with his palm, Samson walked towards the door. "I have to go change." He brushed past Ennis, and found the two Soldiers continued to block his path. He tensed, felt his anger rise…

"Let the Captain go. He had an accident and needs to clean up," Ennis said, without turning around. The Soldiers stepped back, and Samson pushed past them. He stalked through the hallways, refusing to meet the gaze of anyone he passed. The mnemonic disappeared back into his subconscious again, but a little note of hate scraped along beneath it.


	33. Screed

**Notes from GobHobblin**: Many thanks to the awesome Gemini011 for editing this chapter.

* * *

Asuka finished vomiting into the toilet well after there was nothing left in her stomach. She shivered, her teeth chattering and her vision blurry. Nerves. Nerves was all. Just nerves, nothing more.

_ There is nothing more terrifying than a thing that moves of its own will_. She tried hard to control her breathing, but found it short and stolen. Putting her hands on her eyes, she leaned against the stall and willed herself to calm. _It was protecting you. It protected you. This is a good thing._

_ There is nothing more terrifying than a thing that moves of its own will…_

"Are you all right, Second Child?" Asuka jerked back, a haunted look on her face. Behind her, Rei was squatting and leaning on her thighs, an inquisitive look on her face.

"Of course I'm all right!" Asuka snapped. "Don't I look all right?"

"No," Rei replied without irony.

Asuka looked away, wiping her lips with the back of her hand. "Why do you care, Wonder-Girl?"

"Because Shinji would," the girl replied. "Can I get you anything?" Asuka scoffed, knowing it was mean and not being able to help herself. She snuffled, and said nothing more.

"Would you like some water?" Rei persisted.

"I can get my own water. Go away," Asuka hissed, trying to stand. Her legs felt numb, though. When it was clear she was having trouble, Rei reached out and awkwardly helped Asuka to her feet. When she was finally standing, Asuka jerked her arm away. "I said go away!" she snapped. Rei simply stood there, still calmly studying the whole thing like it was a puzzle that needed solving. "Stop looking at me!"

"I'm trying to understand why Shinji is attracted to you," Rei said. Asuka made a strangled noise, and her cheeks burned fiercely. She almost fell down from the shock.

"I what huh what no I…gah!" she jabbered, unable to form coherent words. Rei cocked her head, honestly surprised by the reaction. Asuka got her footing under her, and screamed, "What are you _talking_ about!? Why…what is _wrong_ with you!?"

"I was answering your question," Rei replied. "I don't see why that should make you upset."

"It just…_does_!" Asuka snapped. "What gives you the right to think about such things?"

"Shinji devotes a lot of attention to you despite how poorly you treat him. He places himself at great risk on your behalf. This seems contradictory to me: I'm not sure I understand how that works. I'm…curious." Rei shrugged, as if apologizing. Asuka stumbled past her to the sinks, turning on the water and rinsing her mouth. It gave her time to try and figure how to respond.

"Why do you care so much?" she asked. "Are _you_ attracted to him?"

"I think that I admire him," Rei said. "He's…kind."

"And that's what you base it all on? That he's _nice_."

"Would you rather he wasn't?" Asuka glanced at Rei to see if she was making fun of her. The expression was still bland: the question was honest curiosity.

"I didn't say that," Asuka snapped. Rei shook her head.

"You speak in so many contradictions…it is bewildering."

"Then stop talking to me, if it's so frustrating," Asuka hissed. She splashed water on her face, and she remembered the conversation with Shinji in the ice-cream parlor.

"Rei, why do you even Pilot?" she asked.

There was a brief silence, heavy with contemplation. "I used to know; now I'm not so sure."

"There seems to be a lot of that going around," Asuka murmured.

"I once craved the return to nothingness…to dissolve," Rei continued, as if Asuka had not spoken. "As time goes on…I wonder if that is truly my desire, or something else within me. Either way, I don't feel as…certain on that thought. Not anymore."

"A return to nothingness? Who wants to be _nothing_? Really, between you and Shinji…."

"Not Samson?" Rei asked.

"_No_!" Rei visibly flinched when Asuka shrieked the word, more from surprise than anything else. Water sloshed from the sink and Asuka's fingers, splashing across the floor tiles. For a moment, neither said anything, the only sound in the small space coming from the running sink. Slowly, Asuka relaxed. "No. Not him. Nothing for him. He doesn't _exist_."

"Grendel does."

"Why do you have such an interest that piece of garbage?" Asuka snapped.

"…It hurts."

"What?"

"Grendel. It hurts. I feel…pity for it. I guess. I can't place it." Rei shrugged. "It just seems…familiar somehow." She glanced away. "I don't know why I feel I should tell you these things."

"I don't, either," Asuka retorted. She glanced down, sniffing. "I guess…I should be glad you are, though, right?"

"Why?"

"It's…confidence. You'd normally tell this stuff to Shinji, right?"

"No…well…perhaps. Sometimes," Rei pondered.

"I don't care one way or the other," Asuka said. "But we're a team, so we need to know these things, right? To work better together."

"As long as Samson isn't involved?"

"Nnnn…. Yesss…" Asuka grated. The name was becoming something of a trigger word for her, and she was having difficulty controlling her temper.

"That's good, then," Rei said, "That we can share like this."

"Yes. Yes, it is."

"Is there anything you wish to share?" Rei asked.

"Not with you," Asuka scoffed. "I have no problems."

"None?" Rei cocked her head. It was hard to tell if she was being sarcastic or not. Asuka decided she was, and made a face.

"None," she snapped, turning back to the mirror. Rei watched her back for a long time, before turning to leave. "Some," Asuka sighed. Rei stopped, glancing back in surprise. "I don't want to talk. Right now."

"I see," Rei said. She shrugged. "If you don't want to, then don't." She left, and Asuka gripped the counter, willing herself to calm.

* * *

"Again...another EVA moving on its own," Ritsuko said, watching the playback. The screen displayed security footage of Unit-02. There it was, screaming and raising its hand. Moving its head. Astounding. Simply astounding.

"No one knows the trigger, yet?" Misato asked.

"I have a theory. Some people saw Asuka and Samson arguing. A few said it looked like it was getting ugly," Ritsuko mused. Misato thought back to when Unit-01 deflected debris from Shinji, when he first arrived in the midst of an attack. Defending the Pilot...

"So…what, are you saying that 02 was trying to…get Samson?"

"Probably. Maybe. I have to hear more about it, but doesn't that look like its trying to find someone? I mean, look…the head is clearly locked on to something, the arm moves with it." Ritsuko traced the two patterns with the back of a pen. "That's almost hunting behavior right there. We may have to reassess what we thought the Evas capable of."

"That's not…comforting," Misato murmured, slouching on Ritsuko's shoulder. She leaned back, feeling pops in her shoulder. An EVA that moved without a Pilot or even a power source…once was a fluke. Twice was a pattern. That had the potential for disaster written all over it. Unbelievable….

"Is she okay?" It was Kaji's voice, and it issued from a space over Misato's head. The effect surprised her so much that Misato yelped and backed up, pushing into Kaji and forcing his arms halfway around her from the momentum. She sputtered, turning into him and shoving him away.

"Don't do that!" she snapped.

"Is Asuka okay?" he asked again, serious.

"Yes, she's fine. No one was hurt, amazingly," Misato said.

"What happened?"

"We're still trying to figure it out. I think…well, _Ritsuko_ thinks, but I agree…that Samson was involved somehow."

Kaji nodded, slowly. "That boy is trouble. He's dangerous."

"Obviously, Kaji, I don't need _you_ to tell me that. I have eyes and feminine intuition. You have eyes and that's it."

"…You like my eyes," Kaji said.

"Don't start that, I don't have the time," Misato sighed.

"You like it when I look at you," Kaji said, his expression softening. He leaned in a bit closer.

"I said stop," Misato murmured, her face set and hard.

"You could fall into them, I bet," Kaji added.

"…I really could…"

"As touching as your reunion is," Ritsuko said drolly, "I would appreciate it if you two stopped getting hot and heavy right behind me. Some of us actually work for a living."

"Just find out why that EVA moved!" Misato snapped, suddenly flustered. Kaji simply smirked, and walked out of the office, leaving Misato fuming and blushing in his wake.

* * *

It was something of a surprise to Samson to arrive to the gym and find someone at his usual place. The individual striking the bag barely moved it, but that wasn't entirely surprising when the blows came from Shinji. For a combat specialist in an Eva, the boy had no concept of body mechanics. The punches were all from the arms, the wrists were bent, and for all his frustration and energy, the power from the strikes was just wasted.

Samson still trembled internally from the fright Unit-02 had given him, and he had just the time to clean up and change into gym clothes. He decided he wanted to break something besides an office, and there might be words between him and Ennis if he simply beat some poor plebe into brain-death. The gym it was, and here was Shinji doing…

Well, doing _something_, but it wasn't striking. Samson laughed, despite himself, and Shinji turned in embarrassment. He wore cargo shorts and a t-shirt, hardly gym-appropriate wear. Samson held up his hands in appeasement. "I'm sorry. You're just so…enthusiastic."

"I'm trying, aren't I?" he snapped, feeling ashamed of his pitiful strikes. How long had Samson been watching? The larger boy crossed over, shucking his shoes and socks and putting an appreciative hand on the heavy bag.

"Trying is nothing," Samson said. "Success is doing it. Trying is simply failing. Would you like to succeed, or fail some more?"

"Succeed, obviously!" Shinji snapped. He relaxed, his frustration ebbing away. "Did something happen out there? I thought I heard some noise."

"There was an issue down in one of the Eva paddocks. Nothing serious," Samson said tersely. He laid a hand on Shinji's chest and shoved lightly. The boy stumbled back and fell onto the seat of his pants.

"What…what was that for!?" he squawked.

"Look at that," Samson said. "No relaxation whatsoever. You're tense to the point of brittle. I could huff and puff and blow you down. Stand up, we got work to do."

"W…on what?" Shinji asked, standing awkwardly. Samson held up a finger, one foot slowly moving behind the other.

"The strike is not in the limb, it's in the hips. The rotation of the torso, driving the blow into place." He slowly showed the action, pivoting his torso while pushing off the ground. The fist connected with the bag, pushing it until his arm was completely extended and the bag was all but up in the air. Samson stepped aside, to let the bag swing free. "It's simply force—" the bag swung away from Samson, then returned, "Trans-_fer-_ral." On the center syllable, he drove a fist into the bag, stopping it dead in place. Even an amateur like Shinji could appreciate the _exactness_ of the strike, the right force used to negate and cancel the energy of the swinging bag.

"So…you're gonna teach me how to punch?"

"No, I'm gonna teach you how to walk," Samson said, reaching out and scooping up Shinji's shirt collar. He turned, lightly tossing Shinji towards the mat. The boy tripped over his own feet and fell with a grunt. "I'm also gonna teach you how to fall, I think. You keep that up, you're liable to get hurt."

"Stop tossing me around then!" Shinji snapped, rolling over. He gasped, for Samson had moved very quickly and very silently, and was now crouched over Shinji. One knee checked Shinji's forward movement, his gray eyes hard and boring into Shinji. A fist was raised over his head, and the other hand was forward, nearly but not quite cupping Shinji's neck.

"If you don't want to be tossed around, don't let me," Samson said. The hand dropped and grabbed Shinji's shirt again, and pulled him to his feet. He released Shinji, and began to circle him. "You know what asking gets you? Nothing. 'Please, please, no, no, stop, I beg you, I won't do it again, cross my heart.'" He said the words in a sing-song, mocking voice. "If you want something, it's all down to you. You want money? Get a job or rob a bank. You want friends? Find them yourself. You want people to notice you? Make yourself noticeable. You want to stop being pushed around?" He drove in on Shinji, putting his face inches from the other boy's. Shinji jerked back.

"Push…back," Samson said. "That begins with the walk."

"The walk."

"Balance, grace, and form. To throw a good punch, it is far less about strength, than fluid movement. Though strength doesn't hurt. At least not you." Samson smirked. "You want to put someone down, you can't be put down yourself. Push me down." Shinji hesitated, and Samson laughed. "Come on, Lady-Boy. Hands are behind my back. Push me to the ground!"

Shinji walked up, and tried to use his momentum to push Samson down. Both hands slammed into his chest, but it was like trying to push a wall. "Oh, that was weak!" Samson chided. "Again!" In frustration, Shinji strained into him with no avail. Then, sharply, Samson turned, letting Shinji's hands slide past him. Shinji's face slammed into a bicep, and Samson leaned into him, forcing Shinji back and onto the ground again. Shinji slapped the ground, hollering in frustration.

"Angry?" Samson asked in a cold tone. Shinji checked his temper, suddenly intimidated.

"…No."

"You better be. I pushed you down. I made a fool out of you," Samson said. "What are you going to do with that anger?"

"…I don't know."

"Oh, come on!" Samson said, irritated. "What does anger do?"

"It…makes me angry?"

"No, the _action_ makes you angry! The _anger_ gives you impetus and momentum. Ride the anger to and _through_ your target. Now stand up, and I'm going to show you how to stand. And how to walk. You won't get it today, or tomorrow, but you'll probably get it by the end of the week if you pay attention."

"Are you saying I'm stupid?" Shinji asked.

"You sound like the German," Samson said, bemused. "I swear she's a bad influence on you. No, Shinji, I'm saying you have a lifetime of bad habits built into your natural movements, and that I might be able to get you thinking away from them within a week's time. It will take you at least a _year_ to feel natural at it, but a week later is better than this moment now. You can only go up from here."

Shinji clenched his fists, and looked down at his lap. He hadn't thought of it that way. He was weak…he knew that. He didn't think he could get any weaker than he already was, because what was lower than Shinji Ikari? When viewed like _that_…what was the only direction left to go? Certainly not down.

He looked up at Samson, the boy patiently waiting. Slowly, Shinji stood up.


	34. Conversion Method

**Notes from GobHobblin:** You know what's awesome? Having a beta-reader that knows more about English than the writer. And able to point out holes in the plotting. Gemini011 is the man! Thanks again to his awesome editing and observational skills! On that note, the updates for YC(N)T will probably slow down a bit from the 'three chapters a day' pace I've had before, so as to allow Gemini011 time to glance over, but the result will be a much, much better read. Yay, beta-reader! (this is where I throw up my arms and go 'Whoo!' The people in Starbuck's don't understand...but they never will...).

* * *

Asuka had long ceased to notice the strong scent of LCL as she stood before Unit-02, pondering it. Two days had passed since the "Event." Her time in school had been largely introspective, as she avoided her normal clutch of companions. Returning to the apartment, she would ignore the presence of Shinji or Misato to stare at the television, not seeing but thinking. She finally worked up the nerve to confront the EVA, but she found the courage fleeting as she approached the hanger. She had a moment where she wanted to turn back, but barreled through that as she did with most things in her life. The idea of 02 had changed, fundamentally, in those moments where it had moved. Asuka had adored the EVA, still did. And yet…

The small, animal part of her brain had become an insistent buzz. The idea that 02 could move _without _her seemed frightening on many levels. The most obvious was that simple moment of being under it, of seeing the urge to move and to _hunt_. Even the peripheral sensation had left Asuka queasy. Under all that was the deeper fear: if Unit-02 could move _without_ Asuka, did that mean they could use another Pilot to synchronize with it? That was always something that Asuka had academically known, but this highlighted that point. Even more so….

Did they need Pilots at all?

"Of course they need us," she hissed, "How else could they get the results they've already had?" Unit-02 did not reply. Asuka rocked on her heels, the four eyes of 02 seeming to gaze back with indifference. "Were you trying to protect me?" she asked. Still, the EVA said nothing.

She closed her eyes, playing the scenario back in her mind. She and Samson had nearly come to blows…the roar…the jittering hand grasping…and the emotions that followed. Awe, amazement…fear…fear…she opened her eyes, the slick-sweat _crawling _sensation returning to her spine. She had loved 02 as though it was a living thing, still did love it, for she didn't really think she truly loved anything else.

Was 02 an actual, living thing? With its own drives?

"I bet you're just having a ball up there," she said, "watching me fret over you. Well, don't get smug yet! I'm still the Pilot in this relationship!" To her satisfaction, 02 dared not refute the claim. She paced the observation walkway for a moment, thinking it over.

"I am _flattered_, though, that you felt the need to stick up for me," she finally said. "I can take care of myself, though. I've always been able to. You know that better than anyone!" 02 did not disagree. "Hurensohn is nothing. He's just one more obstacle to crush. I can do that, right?" She looked up at the EVA for approval. Its lack of response irritated her.

"You moved then, why don't you move now? Are you ignoring me on purpose?" She felt a thrill at the challenge. Did she actually _want_ to see the EVA move again? God, no! The thought of being ignored, though…that seemed infinitely more terrifying. Even if the EVA was to turn its head, even if the basilisk gaze sent Asuka scrambling from the room….

It would have still looked at her.

She slouched, shaking her head. This was stupid. She was being stupid. She turned to leave, and squeaked when she saw Shinji standing at the end of the bridge.

"How long have you been there?" she demanded.

"I just got here," he said defensively, holding up his hands.

"You were practically lurking there! I feel like every time I turn around, someone else is sneaking up on me! What's wrong with everyone?" She pushed past him, stomping into the docking passage. "What do you want, anyway?"

"I was just checking on you," Shinji said. "You've been…sort of somewhere else."

"Well, t_hank you _for your concern!" she snapped. Asuka was beet red, and her chest was tight with humiliation. She was angry because of that, and she wanted Shinji to take the full brunt of it. How much did he hear? "I can rest easy tonight knowing that _Shinji Ikari_ has my back!"

"I do!" he protested, following her. She whirled, sticking her face in his. Normally, that would have sent him backpedaling and stuttering. Aside from a little bob backwards, he stood his ground. That left Asuka lingering somewhere between frustration and curiosity.

"Do what?" she growled.

"I have your back," he insisted. "I mean, you have mine, right?" She considered the question carefully, her eyes narrowing and boring into Shinji. A single sliver of sweat beaded his forehead, but his expression was defiant. When she said nothing, Shinji added, "We're Pilots, so we…watch each other's backs."

"…I can accept that answer," she mumbled. She turned to leave when a klaxon blared so suddenly that Shinji and Asuka yelped, their hands covering their ears.

"Orange Pattern alert. Potential Angel inbound. Repeat, Potential Angel inbound."

* * *

A great sphere floated over Tokyo-3, alternating its coloration from black to white in a way that both dazzled and hurt the eyes. Misato had to stop looking at it to fend off a strange wave of nausea, her hand clasped over her mouth. Something about the alternating patterns just sat poorly on the eyes. She heard Ibuki cough, and turned to see the younger woman had placed her hands over her eyes. Everyone else was making a point to look away from the strange object.

"So, has it moved from that spot?" Misato asked.

"Negative; it hasn't moved since it first appeared," Hyuga said. "It's just…staying in place."

"No AT Field?"

"None. I don't get it. I can't tell if this is a strong Angel…or just a weak one," Hyuga murmured.

"Or even an Angel at all. So…no AT Field, a stationary position. Hang around and come and see," Misato murmured.

"And I saw, and behold a white horse." Cooper added. "Johnny Cash, _The Man Comes Around_."

"Don't ruin that one for me, I swear to God…" Aoba said.

"I have to be drunk to sing Cash. Grendel is in the launch chute. We can deploy immediately if you need, ma'am."

"Hold off until the other EVAs are ready," Misato said. "Prep the Pallet Guns for 01 and 02, sniper system for 00."

"So, Rei in over-watch, Shinji and Asuka on advance?" Aoba asked.

"Yes, and make Samson the spotter for Rei," Misato added, turning back to Cooper. "He can stay close to Shinji and Asuka."

"Roger, ma'am."

Misato tapped a toe, feeling her stomach pinch. She hadn't eaten today…not wise. She leaned over Ibuki's station. "Where are those cookies?" Ibuki jerked a thumb at Cooper next to her.

"He's had an especially glowing record recently. Lots of good behavior. And he worked through sixty percent of my processes checklist." She winked at Misato. "Ate all of them, ma'am."

"Well, that doesn't help _me_," Misato grumped. She glared at Cooper, who was busy at his console. He seemed to feel the heat of the gaze, and glanced up.

"I earned those cookies," he sniffed. "Bite me. Ma'am."

"Ibuki!"

"Ma'am!" The woman sat straight in her chair, recognizing a command voice.

"You will bring more snacks. Cooper gets none," Misato ordered.

"Aye, ma'am," she said smartly.

"That is…deliberate hostility between two allied nations. There can be…formal allegations of misconduct and…ooh, I'm gonna hack your bank account," Cooper said, shooting mean looks at Misato.

"Feel free, there's nothing there," she said, sticking her tongue out at him. He continued to grumble as reports flowed in from the hangars. The EVAs were on their pads, and launching. To meet…what?

She tried to focus on the assumed-Angel again. _What are you? _Misato wondered.

* * *

Asuka glowered. "Second Child, your synch rates are a little dicey," Ibuki said. "Everything okay?"

"Just worry about the Angel," Asuka grumbled. _I have your back_. She rolled her eyes. Why did that have to get her so flustered right now?

"Okay, kids," Misato said. "Advance in on it, slowly. We don't know its capabilities yet, and the AT Field seems to be down. That bothers me."

"Should make it an easy target, then," Samson buzzed.

"'Should' is not 'will,'" Misato reminded. Asuka huffed, feeling uneasy all of a sudden. She had the sensation she was being watched, and followed the pull. 01 was staring at 02. Shinji's face popped up in the space in front of her.

"Do you want to take point?" he asked.

Asuka bit her lip in thought. She closed her eyes, feeling the presence of Unit-02 around her. _You were trying to protect me, weren't you_? Something fierce filled her heart.

"Of course!" she said. "We always work best when you provide support, right?" Shinji gave a rueful grin.

"Sure," he said.

"Are we having a moment, or are we advancing?" Samson grumped, his image cutting in.

"Keep your panties on, All-American," she hissed. "Unit-02, advancing."

"Unit-01, supporting the advance," Shinji chanted.

"Grendel, moving to observation point," Samson added.

"What about you, Wonder-Girl? Are you in position?" Asuka asked, moving between the buildings of Tokyo-3. The structures had been left up, to provide the EVAs some concealment in their advance.

"Unit-00, in position and providing over-watch," the girl said. The advance moved slowly, Units 01 and 02 moving as one and Grendel trailing just behind. They advanced under the floating sphere, drifting serenely over Tokyo-3. No attack yet…no AT Field detected. Asuka squinted. This all felt wrong.

"So…do we attack, or what?" Shinji mused.

"Of course we attack!" Asuka said, but she stayed rooted in place. "Maybe, though…."

Where was the AT Field? All of her screamed to go in and hit it now, hit it while it was weak. Be the hero. Prove her worth. Win. That thought stayed, though, a little word of warning telling her to stay put. Something about that Angel bothered her, and she didn't know what it was.

"No one attack yet, just hold positions," Misato ordered.

"That means you, Red," Samson grunted. Asuka snarled.

"You stay out of it, Hard-Cheese," she snapped. "Just sit back and hold your position."

"Don't worry," he said. "I'll be here. I'll be sure to put down that Angel when you can't."

"Asuka, are you listening?" Misato asked. Asuka stared at Samson's image.

"You'll be lucky if there are scraps left over to play with!" she screamed.

"Of course…because you'll attack and win the day," Samson scoffed. "What are you waiting for? A permission slip? Let's call your mother and ask." Asuka's hands gripped the butterfly controls so tight she could have cut her fingerprints into them. Rage. Rage consumed her. Screaming, she charged forward.

"Asuka! Hold position!" Shinji insisted.

"I'll show you how to handle an Angel!" she screamed, sliding to a halt and cutting loose a volley of fire from her Pallet Gun. It wasn't like the Angel was a small target, and all shots hit directly.

Or seemed to. The Angel accepted the shots, and seemed to phase in and out. Asuka gaped, surprise on her face. She had hit it…right? She watched as the shadow it cast squirmed across the pavement…of its own volition…to surround her…and…solidify. Asuka watched it all as though it was a dream, and realized too late she was beginning to sink.

"What…what is _this_!?" Asuka wailed. 02's feet had sunk up to the ankles, and all efforts to leap away were not working. She sprayed the black, viscous _stuff_ with the rifle. The material puckered, then reformed. Unit-02 continued to sink, and Asuka felt her chest tighten in rising panic. Glancing up, she saw the Angel again. "Die!" she screamed, emptying the rest of the magazine at the Angel. Again, it vanished.

"I-I can't hit it!" she wailed, tossing the Pallet Gun away and twisting the EVA towards the nearest building. The EVA dug its fingers into the structure, trying to drag itself free from the material, but she couldn't find purchase. It was like glue, or molasses. Inexorably, inevitably…down. Down. Down! Panic was starting to give way to cold, naked fear.

"Asuka!" The girl twisted and saw Unit-o1 standing at the edge of the shadow. He wasn't too far away, but he might as well have been on the other end of the planet.

"Quick!" she said. "Grab the cable!" At 01's feet, the power cable trailing to 02 was already submerged and sinking below the morass. Unit-01 stepped back, reached down, and hoisted the cable. It began to strain, slowly but surely withdrawing the line from the inky black. Asuka glanced down: Unit-02 was up to its stomach now. She felt the old familiar panic, the kind that she had felt in the volcano. Waiting to be crushed, to disappear and to cease existing.

To cease existing….

"Got it!" Shinji said, and Asuka felt the whole EVA shudder as the line went taut. "I'm pulling Asuka out!"

"Geeze, it took you long enough," she sighed, still jittery. She'd feel better once free of the muck….

She was still sinking. She was still sinking, even though she felt the strain from Unit-01. "What are you doing!?" she screamed. "Grow a pair and put some backbone into it!"

"Grendel, moving to assist," Samson said, and she could have vomited at that. Samson, saving her…impossible. If only _Shinji_ had been able to man up and do it himself! And she was still sinking! This was intolerable.

And then the cable snapped.

For a moment, the entire EVA had been shuddering from the strain, and the next, it had stopped. "The power cable tore loose!" Shinji screamed. "Hang on, Asuka! I'm…gonna…do _something_!" The surface of the nothingness rose up swiftly.

"Shinji!" Asuka gasped. "Shinji, do it _now_!" He never had a chance to, for as soon as Asuka said it, Unit-02's head dipped beneath the surface, followed by its weapon pylons. It was gone.

* * *

"ASUKA!" Shinji screamed, willing the EVA forward into that same, black nothing. Before it could move, it crumpled to the ground, the smaller but denser Grendel piling down on it. Looping its arms beneath and around Unit-01's, the American EVA leapt backward, away from the consuming mass. "Let go!" he screamed, struggling against Grendel. "Let go right now!"

"Control, this is Grendel. Unit-o2 is gone, Unit-01 is attempting to follow. I will not be able to restrain Ikari," Samson chanted. Shinji raged against him, trying to cut loose, trying to will his EVA forward. They had made it a good distance from the city, and the Angel itself, before he managed to squirm away from Grendel. Again, Grendel threw itself down on top of Unit-01.

"Any suggestions would be appreciated," Samson insisted, patiently. Unit-01 elbowed Grendel in the head, and Samson's face jerked obediently in tune. "Shinji, you need to stop this right now."

"Let go! I can still save her!" he insisted. Inside the Plug, he pushed against the butterfly control array. Move, damn it, move! _I have your back_. _I promised! _Before he knew what was happening, synchronization cut. "What…what's happening!?" he screamed. He felt a jerk as the Plug was ejected, rocketing away through the air and further away from Tokyo-3. And the Angel.

And Asuka.

He raged impotently, twisting at the controls, screaming. It was unfair. She was gone just like that, and he couldn't do anything! It was _unfair_.

Samson watched the Plug trail away through the air, pondering what had happened. Unit-02 had vanished, into the shadow out there. He repressed the urge to giggle, with some success. It was then he saw a streak of blue working its way down to Tokyo-3. He scoffed in amazement; Rei was moving to help Asuka. Why? There was nothing to help!

_ The…blue one…_Samson twitched. The voice was meek, but full of wonder. He mentally sighed.

_ What about it?_

_ It's in trouble…yes?_ Well, it wasn't, and Samson didn't know why that little presence was so curious. He watched as Unit-00 began hopping from one sinking building to the next, closing to the point where Unit-02 had vanished. He raised an eyebrow; the shadow had expanded. How? The floating sphere seemed no larger than before.

_ It can take care of itself. We stay here._

_ But…it…. _The voice seemed to squirm at the edge of Samson's understanding. He ignored it, gazing down at the incapacitated Unit-01 and listening to the babble of control at the edge of his conscious mind. Asuka had vanished into…somewhere else. An unexpected outcome, but not entirely…unfor…Samson glanced down at his leg.

It had begun moving on its own.

_ What are you doing?_

He felt his body twist and rotate slowly, as though it belonged to someone else. He narrowed his eyes. Grendel's Plug Suit was a slave-device with built in inhibitors, to simulate the sensation of contact and pressure. If Samson gripped a building, the inhibitors would 'lock' the gloves, making it feel as though he was himself gripping the structure. It was meant only for sensation, though, as he himself moved Grendel through his Plug Suit.

It was a sort of door into the EVA…and doors swung both ways. It had never, in his wildest imaginings, occurred to Samson that the _EVA_ could move _him_ the same way. Which it was doing. Now.

_ What are you doing, love?_ The question had a singsong note to it, mocking and playful. And dangerous. The voice did not reply. _Ignore me not, lovely, ignore me…stop right now._ Still, the voice cowered from him. And still, he turned towards Unit-00 against his will.

_ I said STOP!_

Grendel hunched down and _leaped..._.

* * *

Rei thought that Asuka had behaved foolishly, but still, seeing the girl and her EVA simply _sink_ into nonexistence was unprecedented. Unit-00 advanced from its over-watch point to get a better view of things, and there Rei watched Shinji's futile rescue attempt, and Samson's more successful rescue of Shinji. She heard the rage, the pleading, the sheer desperation. Shinji had fought to return, fought without knowing what would happen.

He would do anything for the redhead girl. It was in that moment Rei decided to do something that she herself knew to be foolish. She advanced to assist Asuka…hopefully.

Unit-00 cut through the air, digging up trees and dirt, then tarmac in its wake. It hit the edge of the shadow, and flew over it, coming down on a building, springing away, hitting another one. She glanced at her map, closing on the last known coordinates of Unit-02. She landed on the nearest building to that spot, and scanned the surface for any breach or crack, _anything_ that might indicate a sub-surface 02.

It wasn't looking good.

Rei grimaced, realizing she might have just wasted Unit-00. She began scanning for a way to escape. She recalled Unit-02's power cable had been snagged by the nothing, and decided she may have to eject hers in order to flee. Except…

The cable was taut. Tracing the line of cable, which sat suspended over the lake of emptiness, she saw Grendel at the edge, the cable gripped in both its hands. It was pulling, keeping the cable free and clear from the muck. She found herself suddenly curious at the gesture. Samson could, logically, make the decision to save a comrade, or at least save one of the EVAs. To see him do it, however…seemed odd.

The building beneath her shuddered. No time to sit and ponder: deciding to take a risk, she ejected the cable. Five minutes of reserve power kicked in, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Without the interferences of Angels or flawed systems, five minutes of reserve power was far more than enough. She sprang forward, following her trail back to her point of origin and continuing up the hill to a reserve launch chute. As she moved, she glanced back at Grendel. It had a shuddering, twisting moment, as though it had touched a live wire. And then…it was crouching, as if surprised. The stark difference in the before and after was clear to Rei: Samson had not been the one to grab her cable.

Which meant…Grendel…had tried to assist her.

"Odd," she whispered in curiosity, locking Unit-00 onto a recovery pad. It was so odd.

* * *

Samson trembled, rage filling him. _What was that?_ There was no answer, and terrified presence had fled to places even beyond Samson's sight. _If you ever...do that again...there will be consequences._

There was no reply, and Samson continued to tremble, filling the empty spaces of the shared consciousness between him and Grendel with his fury. _I am the Pilot. I steer our course. You are the vessel, so be a good vessel and do as I say._

…_She...needed help..._.

He screamed in rage, and the consciousness that drifted there fled once more. "Grendel," Cooper's voice cut in. "Are you okay? What's happening?"

"Just frustrated, HQ," he murmured, putting a tap on his emotions. "This has been a messy day..."

* * *

"No trace of Unit-02," Gendo murmured, feeling a twinge of relief. Unit-02 was expendable, more or less. If they didn't need to lose it, that would be fine, but it was not a catastrophic scenario. Unit-01, on the other hand...

"We've confirmed that the Angel is, in fact, that shadow on the ground," Dr. Akagi said, practically pushing Ibuki out of her chair to toggle something on her console. Her impatience was getting the best of her. "We can't detect the AT Field because it's focused _inward_. It's a..."

"A door," Gendo said. All eyes turned up to him. "A door to a pocket dimension. Maybe even a whole other universe, correct?"

"Yes," Dr. Akagi said. "A Dirac Sea." She turned back to the main board. The great holographic map display had been replaced with a model demonstrating the bizarre properties of the new Angel that had been recorded thus far. "When Prof. Dirac first postulated the theory, it was merely a mathematical model. A thought object. To actually..._see_ one..." Dr. Akagi trailed off. The scientist in Gendo took over in that moment, for just a second. The awe of seeing physics made solid was something religious, something beyond the understanding of mere men. He closed his eyes, pondering it.

A Sea of Dirac...just outside...

Amazing.

"What about Asuka?" He opened his eyes, and studied Maj. Katsuragi. The woman looked furious. "What efforts can we make in order to recover Unit-02? She's lost her power cable!"

"Without power," Ibuki said, "She may have...sixteen hours. At best, on complete passive operations."

"We shall make all efforts to recover Unit-02, but if we cannot...the Angel is the priority," Gendo said. Katsuragi gave him a very insubordinate expression. "That is my final decision." He locked eyes with the woman, until she acquiesced and lowered her expression.

"Ma'am," Cooper said, turning around. "I cannot begin to comprehend the physics of this, but a door has to open both ways, right? So if Unit-02 went in, there has to be a way out, right? If you want to divert MAGI completely to the process of figuring out how to do _that_, we can switch all the remaining EVAs over to Paragon. We already know they can run off of it, if just barely." He waited patiently, and glanced up to the command deck.

Gendo considered that. It was true, the Americans did provide a certain...latitude of movement. Recovering Unit-02 would be beneficial in the long run as well...

"Do it," he said. "Thank you again, Lt. Cooper, for your suggestions."

"Yes, sir," he said, bobbing his head. He began to turn back when he caught Maj. Katsuragi's eyes. She nodded gratitude, and Cooper shrugged, turning back. The little exchange was not lost on Gendo. For better or worse, the Americans were here to stay.

It was then the klaxon began blaring loudly.

"_Second _Blue Pattern confirmation...One hundred-and-fifty miles and closing!" Hyuga snapped, as a second alert buzzed. Gendo narrowed his eyes, and Fuyutsuki made a strangled noise. The image above them displayed a squat, floating hulk, with two stumpy legs, what appeared to be a face...no arms...

"This is out of sequence," Gendo grunted. "Again, two Angels, simultaneously, one appearing before its time."

"What?" Fuyutsuki asked.

"I took time to go over what we know of the Dead Sea Scrolls, and paid special attention to some of the descriptions. There was a shadow that cast shadows, a storm that breathed, and a mountain that moved."

"That is...very vague."

"Yes, but there are other indicators I will not go into at this time, for one with eyes. Suffice to say, _that_ up there," he pointed at the floating entity, "That is _not_ the next Angel in sequence." He stood. "What has the first one done?" he called.

"Expanded to a diameter of 680 meters and not moved," came the report. "We're still trying to determine its physical properties, but that may be its limit."

"Monitor it, and re-prep all remaining EVAs for potential combat." The smile returned, and he felt a strange twinge of pleasure. "This could be fun, Fuyutsuki."

"God forbid if it isn't," the older man said, less than enthusiastic.


	35. Hiss

"Shinji!? Shinji! Please answer…talk to me, you stupid jerk!" No response.

"Misato! Con…Control? Ibuki!?" No response.

"Rei! Someone! Anyone! _PLEEASE!_" No response.

Silence. Silence engulfed her. Silence consumed her. Silence within, silence without. Silence was her companion. Isolation. Emptiness. There was no escaping it, no fleeing from it.

Asuka did not want to die alone.

"Move!" she screamed, pumping the joysticks. "Move! Movemovemove_MOVE!_" No response. No response. No response. She raged, she sobbed, she tore at the console. Nothing. No answers. No response.

NO RESPONSE

Trembling, she slowed her breathing. Gripped the joysticks. Closed her eyes. Rescue. Rescue would come. They wouldn't abandon her. They wouldn't abandon Unit-02. They couldn't…she was too important. Her EVA was too important. They wouldn't abandon her. Not for anything. Not for any reason.

Shinji wouldn't. He had thrown himself into fire and earth for her. Defied the limits of an AT Field to rescue her. He had come for her then, he would come for her now. Only he hadn't. He had stood there, stood there like an idiot, as she sank, as she had been consumed. Eaten.

"I'mnotdeadI'mnotdeadI'mnotdead…" she mumbled, shivering in place. He hadn't saved her. He let her slip away. That…that didn't mean he _wouldn't_ save her, right? He could still come for her. He could still come for her.

_Is this the You that you have created for yourself? The frightened little girl who requires rescued when she is in over her head?_

"No!" she snapped. "I don't need him! I don't need anybody! I don't _need_ him to rescue me!"

_Yet you sit here, waiting for his arrival. Like a princess in a tower._

"Stop it! I am a _soldier_! I am the Pilot of Evangelion Unit-02! That is who I am!" Asuka swung her fist, colliding with the chains of a playground swing. She gripped them for support, leaning heavily, trying to control her breathing. The swing had an old, familiar feeling of places she had never visited, feelings she had refused herself. The base joys of a child were beneath her. She was a Pilot. It was what she had been born to be, the only thing of value she could provide. Swing-sets…sandboxes…see-saws…she looked at each, refusing them. Refuting them.

_You deny this image of your Self, when it is what you have made_.

"What are you talking about!?" She whirled toward the voice, and gripped the chains harder. She felt them cut into her skin, press against the bone. A little girl stared up at her, her so-familiar blue eyes staring out of a so-familiar delicate face framed by so-_familiar_ red hair, tied in barrettes. "I loved those barrettes," she murmured. "A gift…from my mother…."

_You run from this past Self, and yet you return to it again and again._

"There's nothing to run from! This place doesn't exist!"

_The ground is here. The chain cuts. The air blows. The Self is the Self._

"…What are you?" The voice came as a whimper, a shadow of the arrogance she could have normally mustered. "What…are…you?"

_I am curious. You fight for so little, but you give all of yourself. To create this image in the minds of others. I do not understand. Explain this. This_…

"Yeah! And not just taller – my figure has filled out, too!" She stood, feet splayed, on the deck of the _Over the Rainbow_. She wore that wonderful sun-dress and matching choker, and those red shoes. Red was her favorite color; it matched her hair. That had been her reasoning, that day. The Synchronization Headset was clipped into her hair. The little status symbol of her role in the world, of her place in it. Why she existed. Asuka squirmed as she watched herself. So loud. So crass. So insistent….

_Explain this. This…._

"Are you stupid? I want to beat it with my Unit-02!" She sat in the crash couch, the butterfly controls gripped tightly in her fists. She grinned, her face feral but her tone happy. Her Plug Suit was blood-red. Red was her favorite color. The world stank of LCL, and she loved it. Loved it more than she loved herself, which was not difficult, because in the end she hated herself so much….

_Explain this. This…._

"Can I pleeeeaaase come in?" she said in a whining, husky voice. She crawled on the ground. Blood caked her knees, smeared her hands. Mud crusted into the cotton of her socks and skirt. She looked disheveled, a stray cat that brought in from the rain. She had thought the voice sounded so seductive when she spoke, so desirable, so adult, and when she heard it now, she heard a child, she heard a _child_, and she was so _ashamed_ of what she had done…

"STOP IT!" she shrieked. "JUST STOP IT!" Asuka tore at her hair.

_Do you desire the thought of You to be this? The image of your Self projected across the minds of those you meet? Is this the You you desire to leave in the world, or is it a shield to hide the real You?_

"I am the real me! I am me! I _am_ me!" She thrashed in the LCL, squirming against the couch as she pulled at her hair. "I am me! I am me!" She trembled, feeling the silence envelop her once more. Her breathing slowed…steadied…ebbed….

She was alone again. "You…you didn't have to leave…" she whimpered. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry! You didn't have to go away!" There was no response.

* * *

Grendel delicately lifted the ejected Plug. It had remained closed after its controlled descent, and steam still hissed from the spent attitudinal jets. "If he needs to eject again, he'll be unable to," Samson said, turning towards Unit-01. Beyond it, over the sea, the newest Angel waited.

"There's no helping that," Gendo Ikari's voice hissed through the LCL. "Re-insert his Plug now." Samson narrowed his eyes. Rare for the Nerv commander to cut in on the line. He wanted there to be no mistake in the orders. _His_ orders. Samson sniffed, looking at the Plug cradled in one hand. His comm display blinked, detecting a loud signal from the Plug. Shinji was in a talkative mood.

"—still alive! She's still alive! Let me go get her, please!" The pleading hit Samson sharp, cutting the molecules of LCL in his little space. He smiled beneath his helmet, in amusement and just a _little_ sympathy.

"Shinji," he said. The boy was still crying, his head slouched down. "Shinji!"

Shinji did not look up, but he had silenced himself a bit. "German put herself in a bad way. Put _herself_ in that position. You tried to help her, you didn't, and it's not your fault. The line broke. Act of God. Wash your hands and move on."

"She…_needed_ me…."

"Nerv below needs you. New Angel, Shinji. New Angel inbound, and it's a strong one. We need all of our remaining EVAs on the ball, so it's back in you go." Shinji was visibly trembling in the little square. He looked tiny, frail, not a soldier at all. It irritated Samson. "Hey!" he barked. Shinji's head snapped up, his eyes wide and tears drifting through the LCL.

"None of that," Samson said, drawing a finger to his face. Grendel mimicked the motion. "The only thing that matters now is survival. Let the eggheads figure a way to beat that black thing back there. This other Angel…that's our department. We kill it…" He made a face, composing himself for his next words, "…and then we see about saving your girlfriend."

"She's…not…." Shinji swallowed. He was too drained to argue the point.

"Yes, sure, she's not. I tell you, she'll be your death. _If _she comes out of that thing," Samson chided. Shinji looked like he was about to cry again. "The Angels did this, Shinji," Samson suggested again. "You would never have had to watch her sink away like that if it wasn't for them. There's an Angel out there now. Let's go kill it." Shinji's trembling subsided, and he searched Samson's blank helmet for anything like a human expression. He swallowed, nervous. Samson snickered. "Won't that make you feel better?"

"…I think so."

* * *

"Plug has been reinserted. Synchronization between the Third Child and Unit-01 can begin again," Samson chanted. Misato listened with half an ear as Hyuga wrapped her thumb with a bandage. In her tension, she had nibbled on the nail, and had bitten down hard enough to tear it. She waved the younger man off and completed the job herself. Things were proceeding at a pace that was all but intolerable.

Intolerable…but not impossible.

"Unit-00 has been refitted and reissued the Positron Rifle," a voice chanted over the intercom. "Deploying now."

"Major," a voice called softly. She turned to Ennis, who had slipped onto the bridge again. It was unnerving how he could come and go with such alarming ease. She nodded, quietly. "I've authorized the deployment of Grendelsbane," he said. "We can send it up wherever you wish."

"Thank you, Major," she said. "Cooper!" she snapped.

"Ma'am!"

"Deploy Grendelsbane to Equipment Pad 33-Alpha."

"Sending the request now, ma'am."

"Keep me posted on its transit," she said. "What has the new Angel done?"

"Just hovering there. I think it's waiting for something."

"Waiting for what? Another Angel?" Ennis murmured.

"Don't say it, then it might come true," Misato snapped. "Any idea on how strong it is? Its capabilities?"

"It's keeping its AT Field low, right now. Just enough to keep it airborne," Ibuki said.

"Keep an eye on it," she snapped.

* * *

A half hour passed, as the three EVAs maneuvered in the hills to better vantage points. Unit-00 hefted the massive Positron Rifle, and Unit-01 had been issued a Sonic Glaive. Grendel had just retrieved Grendelsbane, a massive, forked artillery piece that had a trigger and grip crudely attached to it. Along with the weapon itself, a secondary power cable had arrived, specifically to power Grendelsbane's massive energy requirements. It was a much larger version of the model used on American supercarriers. It looked ugly, haphazard, cobbled-together, but also held a certain lethal note to it. Samson had been dying to try it.

"Grendel, you've been given the clear. Begin the attack," Cooper said, as Grendel pulled the extra cable clear and hoisted the weapon.

"Roger," he replied, hustling to a more agreeable attack point. He had the Angel clear in his sights, clear as day, but he wanted to maximize the attack. He glanced at the black spot still in the center of Tokyo-3. No movement. What was it doing? Digesting what it had consumed? The thought amused him, but he doubted that was true. So, why was it just…sitting there?

One thing at a time. The other Angel seemed aware of the movement, seemed aware that it was about to be engaged. It began to advance, coming in from off the water. Samson began cycling up the power conduits for the weapon. "I've disengaged safety locks," he murmured, drawing a bead on the Angel. His HUD danced with figures and designs, magnifying his target. His target. He smirked. "Target acquired…power level…stable…" He licked his lips. "Engaging."

Grendelsbane spoke.

Electrical arcs, each a synthetic bolt of lightning, strained from the forks and danced along Grendel's bulk. Small fires broke out at its feet, the ground carved and burning from the discharge. Sound ceased, as though stolen by the passage of the bolt. The bolt was a single aluminum rod the length of a city bus and when it left the muzzle of Grendelsbane, it had achieved the fastest velocity man had yet been able to propel a solid mass object. The air shimmered and warped around the trail of its passage, much like water rushing to fill an empty space. In a very real way, that's what happened, for the very path of the bolt had ionized all atmospheric molecules in its path and wake. The remaining afterglow was a double-effect of two phenomena. The inner glow burned from the charged molecules. Friction against the atmosphere had produced the outer glow. It was an astounding sight, the passage of something divine.

And it failed. The path led to the Angel, then turned sharply away at an angle just in front of it. Away and up, through the atmosphere. The bolt had failed to penetrate.

"Re-cocking," Samson said, manually shifting a new bolt into place. He had four more. That was four more chances to pummel or break down the AT Field by the brute force of modern weaponry. He raised Grendelsbane again, fired again. This time, a flower appeared against the Angel, the arching remnants of the bolt after it had disintegrated itself against the AT Field. Each shard would have had enough kinetic force to be a doomsday weapon on its own, but they arched up and away. More luck, Samson decided: if any of the bolts had arched _downward_, into the earth, he might have collapsed the GeoFront.

"Re-cocking," he said again.

"Grendel, our instruments are in flux. Is there any effect on the Angel?" Cooper pleaded.

"I'll tell you when I'm done killing it," Samson said. Then, he beheld a great _light_.

"AT Field expanding! Grendel! MOVE!" Cooper was screaming, but Samson was already airborne, leaping into the sky like a bird taking flight. He had abandoned Grendelsbane, in order to make the leap. It was somewhere down there in those flames. Fire…fire burned everywhere. The kinetic updraft from the shockwave caught the stunted EVA, and tumbled it. Grendel was thrown away from the blast, into a fresh hill, where it landed on its side, awkward and fumbling.

"Up!" Samson raged, deploying the Multitool and a swathe of chaff, smoke grenades, everything he could think of to hide himself. It wouldn't matter, he thought: the Angel probably 'saw' him anyways, in whatever alien method Angels could 'see.' It felt futile, but something about that pleased him.

"I'm engaging," he heard Rei say gently. Massive glowing bolts, the highly charged plasma alloy from the Positron Rifle, sang through the air from a nearby hill. They connected with the Angel, but it ignored them, instead floating in. Advancing. Advancing closer. It was now over land. "The Angel is in range," Samson said, standing. "I'm going to close and engage in hand-to-hand."

"Negative, stay where you are!" Cooper said. Samson disconnected the line. The Angel was closing the distance. It wanted a fight. _Samson _wanted a fight.

"Are you with me, Shinji?" he said. There was no reply. He glanced at the map…Unit-01's IFF was still in place, moving forward but at a slowed rate. Still worried about German, no doubt. It was a sad thing, to Samson, for Shinji to be so affected by that. Why did he throw himself after her? What did he have to gain from it? Was it just…a perverse take on Dulcinea, needing her knight to charge in, no questions asked? He giggled. It felt funny to him. He would have to discuss this with Shinji. After.

Grinning maniacally, Samson sprinted forward as the Angel touched down, its stumpy legs digging into soil. He need to hit the AT Field, push through, _cut…_and _slice_...and _stab_...

The Angel deployed something from its shoulders. The twin objects billowed like cloth, and then…they _moved_. God, how they moved! They sliced through Grendel's weak AT Field like it wasn't there, an insubstantial breath. Samson heard a crunch, felt the pressure, and looked down at his hands. One was bobbing carelessly, the other spasmed and then…stopped. It was then he noted the angle…the angle of his forearms was impossible. Not…correct.

Concerned, he glanced left, and then right. Grendel's arms had been severed at the elbows. The sympathetic feedback in his suit had overcompensated, and crushed his elbows. _I should probably mention this flaw in the design during the debriefing_, he mused, feeling pain but…_not_. It seemed to halt somewhere in his brain, just above the incessant buzz of the 'Itsy-Bitsy Spider' but not quite connecting in his conscious self. It was there. That was all.

He stumbled, slowing in his attack and regarding the Angel. He still had his internal weapons bays. If he could get close enough, he might be able to bully his way through the field…

The cloth moved again, and Grendel's head sailed away. The sympathetic feedback struck again, and Samson grunted as his throat constricted and he _felt_ as well as _heard_ a crunch in his neck. His legs wobbled and vision blurred. His Plug had gone dark, with no eyes to see for it. He tried to walk forward, to will the EVA forward.

_No more…_the voice pleaded. _God, no more…I can't bear it…._

_You'll bear what _I _bear,_ he insisted, but his legs were not working as they should. _I believe my neck is broken_, he mused. He fell forward on his face, and a sardonic, bitter grin fixed itself on his features. It would be necessary for Colin to practice his trade. This was always his favorite part….

* * *

Shinji saw Grendel's contemptuous destruction at the hands of the newest Angel. Rei continued to pump round after round at the Angel, before it turned toward the source. "Rei!" Shinji screamed, "Stop firing and move!" As soon as he spoke, her hill became a holocaust of light and flame. The Glaive no longer felt like it was a worthwhile weapon. It was good for a support position, given he couldn't eject. Not that he ever _had_ ejected in a battle, and if he did, what would prevent the Angel from crushing his Plug like a piece of paper?

He was scared. And distracted.

_Shinji, do it now!_

Shinji swallowed. He hated to admit it, but Samson was right. Asuka had to wait for the moment: _that_ Angel was still sitting in place, _this_ Angel was advancing and fighting. Not knowing what else to do, he charged. He sprinted over the landscape, Unit-01 pressing against the air and straining to move faster, harder, ready for war, ready to fight.

_Won't that make you feel better_? Shinji snarled, hatred, rage, lust, all of it pushing to the top of his chest. He would fight. He would win. He did not know, but back at HQ, his synch ratio was being observed. It was rising…and rising…

The thing turned, and deployed its arms. And collided with Unit-01's AT Field. The arms fouled, twisting and cutting away in random directions. With a roar, Shinji drove the EVA into the Angel, breaking the Glaive against its hide. Hands grappled with the alien body, one digging into a 'shoulder' and ripping one of the 'arms' out and tossing it aside. The other 'arm' billowed, and then wrapped itself about the hand that reached for it, climbing up to Unit-01's shoulder. It then contracted, crushing the arm into paste, before ripping the remains off and throwing them away.

Shinji shrieked. Pain…pain…_pain_…his whole right arm burned, went limp. Misato was screaming. Someone else was screaming. He couldn't see, he couldn't think, but the pain the pain the _PAIN!_ He felt himself drifting down, finding the familiar warm places away from the light and the noise and the burning. Toward that presence that always lurked at the edge of his mind whenever he piloted EVA, the presence that seemed to dart this way and that, shielding itself. Hiding itself.

Now, the presence intruded. Bringing warmth. Bringing…he shivered.

_This…presence…_

It was a scent. It was a memory. It was a tear. It was a taste, a thought, a feeling, an ingrained, instinctive thing. The animal part of the brain recognized it. Shinji gripped it for a just a moment, a child clinging to skirt-tails, before the Plug went dark and he had one word resonating through his mind: _Flee!_

_Mother_….

The world went dark, and he felt himself floating free, with no sense of up or down.

* * *

"Sympathetic resonance is failing! Unit-01 is rejecting the Plug!" Ibuki jerked back. "Unit-01 is _ejecting_ the Plug!"

"How is that possible!?" Misato wailed. Ennis was white as a sheet, his eyes fixed on the massive wall-screen. The Plug drifted through the air, as though it had been catapulted. The Plug's first landing had not been gentle, but had jets to right the pod and slow its descent. Those jets had been burned out.

Shinji was just falling…

And the EVA…it was still moving. The Angel attacked with its remaining arm. Unit-01 caught the fabric, foiling it, tearing it, and pulling it loose. In a motion that beggared belief, it pressed the bloody mass against its own stump…and grew a new arm from it. Misato felt cold in her stomach as the flesh bubbled, slid, reshaped, and solidified into a new arm. A naked…_human_…arm.

The EVA roared. It charged. It forced the Angel down, and if Misato had not thought Angels capable of minor, human sensations like fear and despair, she would have had to change those thoughts now. The Angel _looked_ scared. It _looked_ like it was trying to escape. Misato could understand that; she wanted to escape right now. Someone in the room was weeping, but she didn't know who. It could have been her, for all she knew. Sounds…awful sounds…filled the room as Unit-01 began to _eat_ the Angel. Consuming it, swallowing pieces whole with chewing.

"The…the Angel's AT Field has…f-failed," Hyuga stammered. "I…Unit-01 has…the S2 organ…" He swallowed. "It has consumed the Angel's S2 organ."

"We're getting an overload feed from Unit-01's power cable," Ibuki said. "It's…I think it has its own S2 organ, now!" Pieces of the EVA's armor began to burst, as its muscles pushed and strained beneath plating. It didn't notice, engrossed in gorging itself on the now-dead Angel.

Something profound was happening, something beyond Misato's capacity for words, her capacity to understand. Ritsuko wasn't here. She glared up at the top of the bridge. Fuyutsuki…the Commander…both were gone. Had they fled? Or…she shook her head.

"It's stopped," Cooper whispered. Misato looked back at the screen. The EVA had begun to slump, as if falling into torpor. The Angel was now a great red smear in the earth, pieces of alien flesh lumped and scattered.

"Recover the EVA," she mumbled. "We need to move it away from the other Angel. Do…what's the status of Unit-00?"

"Damaged, but moving under its own power. The First Child is still alive," Aoba mumbled.

"Grendel is…off-line…" Cooper said. "Pilot's life signs are nominal. The Fourth Child is active and stable."

"We…have no EVAs left," Misato said. The announcement was on everyone's minds, but giving it form through vocalization seemed to have made it real. They had no EVAs. One was gone, two were damaged, and the remaining one had…done something. Awful.

"Where's the Third Child?" she mumbled, feeling a new tightness in her chest. The Plug…

"He touched down eight hundred meters from point of origin," Hyuga said quietly. "The Plug cracked when it landed, so…I'm not getting any readings from the Third Child."

"Is he—?" Misato asked, sudden panic in her tone.

"We don't know, ma'am!" Hyuga responded swiftly. "Equipment failure! For all we know…he could still be okay."

"Send out recovery teams, immediately!" she snapped. The world was still shifting, still threading drunk and empty. Misato was gripping the rails as hard as she could. One thing at a time. One thing at a time. She glanced at Ennis. His color had returned, but his eyes looked…so empty. For some strange reason, it made Misato sad. Almost heartbroken.

"This was a near thing," he mumbled. "A near thing."

"It's not over, yet," she replied. "I'm still missing an EVA, and if my calculations are correct…maybe ten hours. Ten hours are all we have to save the Pilot."

"I see," he mumbled. "I would think more like fourteen, based on your Plug's capabilities."

"You don't know Asuka," Misato said, and left the bridge. She needed to corner Ritsuko. Now.


	36. Enlighten

It was so cold.

The scent of blood was strong, and her lungs felt heavy. It was the oxygen, she knew. The oxygen and nitrogen content of the LCL was leeching away, and there was no way to circulate it, to replenish it. The liquid was becoming thicker, its clarity shifting from sickly yellow to bloody orange. When she had still had strength, Asuka made an attempt at opening the Plug, babbling and shrieking. She knew, consciously, that whatever was beyond the hatch was death. Vacuum, empty, a possibly infinite void. That would have been better than this; suffocation or freezing. Those were slow deaths. Death terrified her, but not as badly as the slow death.

She hugged herself, trembling and whimpering in the pod. She had been alone, now, for…a long time. She didn't know how long. It felt too long, and she wondered if perhaps she had died already. Perhaps this was the in-between where the soul lingered before passing on. Or…perhaps this was Hell. She didn't think she had ever done anything in life to justify going to Heaven or Hell, didn't even believe in either of those as concepts. She was believing it now. Hell had become concrete.

Asuka began to cry again. It was loneliness that frightened her more than the death. The loneliness forced her to behold her inadequacies, her failures. Her life of failure. It forced her to be with the one person she hated more than anyone else on the face of the planet. Why was it, then, that she didn't want to die? Why did she continue to cling to life?

Because she was a coward. She was too afraid to die.

_You continue to cling to the Self you have created even when it brings you pain_.

"I…please…don't go away again," she chattered. It was so cold….

_The Self that you make is not the true Self that you are. Would it be so painful to let down the barriers to this shadow? _Asuka was sitting in a dark place, in the center of a vast field of ice. She was naked, and her knees were drawn up to her chin. She wrapped her arms around her legs and shivered violently. It felt like the fluid in her eyes had frozen. The saliva in her mouth had frozen. All was ice. She felt a presence next to her, and turned her head slowly. A little girl with barrettes in her red hair stared at her with a severe expression.

"You…make no…s…s…sense," she whispered. "What…barriers?"

_Is this the way of humans?_ The child spoke in a voice that was young, but too old for her. _Remember the lesson from before: there are many Selves for the body. You, you are the Self that is. Then there is the Self in the mind of Kaji. Then there is the Self in the mind of Misato. The Self in the mind of Rei. In the mind of Samson. In the mind of Shinji_.

"That's…just…weird…" she stammered. "I'm…the…only me. There is no other me _except_ me!" She gripped her legs tighter, willing warmth where there was none. "There…is…"

_You have seen how you create your image across the lives of those you encounter. The Asuka Langley Soryu that is known by others is not the Asuka Langley Soryu who sits here_. Asuka buried her face into her knees. She wanted the voice to stop, but she didn't want it to go away. She was so tired, and so afraid. _You push them away from you, and yet you are afraid of them leaving. Is this the human condition, or is this simply the condition that you have existed in?_

"Why do you want to know so badly?" Asuka croaked.

_I have told you: I am curious. Is it not the condition of life to understand its surroundings? To delve into what is unknown? You are a strange factor, humanity._

"If…you're so curious…why attack us? Why try to destroy us?"

_Because it is our purpose_, the girl replied, confused. _It is what drives our existence. Can we not be curious of that which we must destroy? Are you not curious of that which is us? _Asuka found herself unwilling to answer that question. She turned away from the girl, feeling a strange and welcome warmth. Images flashed before her, images of the apartment. Images of school. Images of the GeoFront, and the headquarters, of the people she had encountered in her life. Her time here.

_The briefness of your lives creates ripples across time, from one point of existence to the next. You desire the recognition that you have been here, that you have existed. That you were you. What is it you desire from them? What truth do you want them to tell you?_

"I see you, Asuka," a voice said. "I see you, Asuka."

"Topnotch, Asuka! You're the best Pilot we've ever had!" Misato cheered, pumping her arms. "No one's better! No one _will_ be!" Asuka squinted. That was nice to hear, but it wasn't what she _wanted_ to hear. Was it? Why did the words feel so hollow?

"You have proven yourself superior, Second Child," Rei pleaded, on her knees and her hands up, shielding her face. "I am so weak in comparison to you! How foolish it was to think a doll could contend with a superior Pilot!" That just sounded stupid. It looked stupid. It made her feel better though; how shallow. How shallow she was. She was making a feast of bread crumbs.

"You're the most popular girl at school, Asuka!" Hikari sang, stars in her eyes. Her hands clasped tightly in front of her, and she was practically spinning with joy and excitement. "I wish I could be like you! You're so talented, and smart, and pretty! You're the best, really!"

"But I'm not the best!" Asuka shrieked. "You would have said it! No one says it! No one sees me! No one hears me! I haven't won a battle at all! Not without _Shinji_ there! He's always there! It should have been _my_ glory! _My_ victory!" She held her hands in front of her, pleading with the phantoms that swirled around her. "I don't want your praise! I want you to _tell me I matter_!" The admission surprised her, but she could not deny the truth of it. She could praise herself. Asuka _did_ praise herself, and in hindsight, that was enough. Others didn't praise her, but that wasn't so bad, was it? It wasn't what hurt. It was the loneliness. It gnawed at her.

Light took her again, and she smelled familiar smells. The expensive cologne that Kaji would wear on certain days. The smell of cooking when Shinji was home, the odd smell of his sheets when she lay on his futon. It was a smell that made her think of a strange variety of things. Of a dog her friend had owned, that she loved very much. Of fields of grass under hot sunlight. Of comfort. Of safety. Of being alive.

_Is that the fundamental crux of existence? For humans to entwine, to combine and create? To live lives as two separate entities, coalesce into one. How curious. How fascinating. The faces of these…of Kaji. Of Samson. Of Shinji. These…yes…these…is this what you desire when you wish to be seen? To know you exist?_

Light consumed her, and from the light, Kaji appeared. He leaned forward, his face relaxed, the grin inviting. He seemed composed from the light, and she had the sense he was unclothed. She could see his shoulders, his chest. They were toned, masculine. His arms stretched out to embrace her. "Asuka, do you want to become one with me? To be of one mind and body? I'm the man you desire above all else. You just need to try harder if you want me to see you." She felt her heart flutter at the thought, but she couldn't decide if it was nervousness or fear that gripped her so. The sensation was so fleeting, she couldn't grab it.

_So mild, and yet so strong. Your thoughts are confused on the matter. Enlightening. Fascinating._

He faded away, Samson loomed in front of her, unwelcome and invasive. She tried to recoil from the image, but he leered towards her, consuming her sight. His smile seemed benign, but it carried a note of disease beneath it. Muscles moved under his skin like a bag filled with adders. "German, do you want to become one with me? To be of one mind and body? I'll give you oblivion. I'll eat your soul. I'll devour you until there's not a scrap of flesh left. It'll be fun." She felt no joy at the image, only anger, resentment, hatred. Defiance of him.

_This one exists in your mind, yet you see him as an opponent. Something to destroy. Should I have left him in darker places? Perhaps not. It is still enlightening: human will destroy human. Human attacks that which is the other. This boy…he is the Other, yes? I…see…and this?_

And then there was Shinji. He was so skinny, so fragile looking. His face was honest, though. Pretty. She didn't like pretty boys. She wanted a man who looked like a man. She wanted Kaji. And yet, she felt warmth. She felt something that she knew frightened her, but she dared not quash it. "Asuka, do you want to become one with me? To be of one mind and body? I do the best I can. I would do anything for you. I would die for you." She tried to reach for him, but she had no hands. She screamed in the silence, _You don't need to die for me! You just need to pull me out! Can't you pull me out? Can't you even _hear _me? _Notably, the voice made no observation. Asuka wondered what that meant.

Kaji's voice echoed. "Do you want to become one with me?"

Samson droned, "I'll give you oblivion."

And then Shinji's voice sang, "We could be of one mind and body and soul." He vanished into the light, his voice lingering in the space in her mind. Did she hate Shinji? She thought back to her stolen glory, to his existence looming over her. Did it consume her…as much as her loathing of Samson? She hated Samson, with all of her soul. It was odd, she thought, that she _should_ hate him. She thought back to her first impressions of him, how he seemed to fit her ideal of a man so perfectly, and yet…When presented with it, set out in stone for her, she despised it. Loathed it. The more Samson existed, the more she felt he _shouldn't_ exist. It was an offense against rightness.

A strange thought crept into her mind: Was her hatred of Samson what prevented her from despising Shinji as much? She felt guilty in that moment. Did Shinji deserve to be despised? Yes, he was an idiot. Yes, he was weak and girlish and generally unable to navigate through life with instructions. He was passive. He was flawed. He was imperfect. He was _not_ Kaji.

Did that mean he should be despised? She squirmed down into her soul, not wanting to admit being wrong, but wondering if she _was_ wrong. He was all of those things, and _still_ he was a better Pilot than her. It galled her, insulted her. It made her doubt her own ability; if someone like _him_ outperformed her, what did that say of _Asuka_? Was she worse than him? She didn't want to be. She couldn't be.

She didn't know. She was confused, uncertain. Asuka tried to fit Shinji into a place in her mind that made sense, and every time she tried to, the place changed. The pieces readjusted. She couldn't fit him, and it angered her. What's more, it frightened her. It then occurred to her that she didn't care, and that truly surprised her.

The more she thought on it, the more she wanted out. Asuka realized that she didn't care if Shinji saved her again. Her pride had vanished during the isolation in the Plug. She didn't care. She just didn't want to die. Asuka wanted out. She wanted out, and she didn't care how she _got_ out.

Asuka was in the Plug once more. The LCL was stagnant, and she felt it like syrup in her sinuses. She was dying. There was no escaping it. It was too cold to move, too cold to think. She thought of Shinji in that moment, and didn't know why. She wanted feel anger at him. Asuka couldn't; she only felt regret. Why would she feel regret? What did she _have_ to regret?

"Mama," she whimpered, at very limit of her strength. The last strand of hope she had. "I…don't want…to…Mama…."

As light engulfed her, she felt warm arms embracing her. A voice called from across a vast chasm. _I have you, love. I always have. Rest a bit, and I'll take care of it. I'll make it all better…._

* * *

"What happened!?"

Ritsuko made a point of not looking at Misato, instead studying the sphere that floated over Tokyo-3. "We have a plan," she said instead, "that might allow us to recover Unit-02. At the very least, it should provide us a good probability of destroying the Angel."

"Don't change the subject!" Misato screamed, staring at Ritsuko's back. It just so happened that gave her an excellent view of the recovery of Unit-01, kneeling in the distance. It was a gory statute, pieces of Angel flesh still twisted into its jaws. She trembled with rage and fear. Yes, she wanted to discuss Asuka's situation, but the EVA's behavior was more pertinent. "I thought they couldn't move without a Pilot. That's the third time that one has, and more to the point, it might have become an Angel in the process! Do we really have control of these things?"

"I don't know," Ritsuko murmured.

"What!?"

"I don't know, I don't _know_!" the scientist screamed, turning back to Misato. "I don't know, all right?"

Misato crossed her arms, and narrowed her eyes. "You're lying."

"How _dare_ you suggest—?"

"It's a fact, and you are lying to me. I don't appreciate that, and I will find out what it is you're keeping from me. I'd hoped our friendship would have encouraged you to be truthful, but I guess not." Ritsuko glanced away. She looked stung by that sentence. Misato hoped that it would have an influence, perhaps elicit more honesty from the woman, but she doubted it. "What's the plan for the remaining Angel?"

"We are petitioning the JASDF for the remainder of the country's N2 explosives stockpile."

"What?"

"We'll drop them all into the Sea of Dirac and detonate them simultaneously, which should…"

"And Asuka?"

"Eva Unit-02 _should_ survive the—"

"And _Asuka_?"

"I hate to be the one to remind you, but in the grand scheme of things, the Pilots are expendable." The words had just left her lips when Misato stepped forward and slapped the scientist. It was not a gentle blow; Misato put all her weight and strength into it. Ritsuko's glasses went skittering across the concrete, and the woman spun, falling to her knees, gasping. She glanced up at Misato, anger and fear warring on her face. Her left eye was already beginning to swell shut from the blow, and a trickle of blood from a cut on her lip stained her chin.

"You…are…you have lost your mind, _Major_!?" Ritsuko hissed, standing on shaky legs. "Have you any concept of what you just _did_? I am…overriding your authority. This operation is now in _my_ hands." She turned to leave, when a chorus of agony cut through the air.

It was in a language known to no man, and Misato turned to stare at the sphere. The black and white patterns had begun to fluctuate in patterns more vivid and more strained than it had shown before. She squinted, trying to discern what had happened, when it solidified into a single solid, black sphere. The sphere began to shudder, to tremble, when a split formed in the center. A cascade of red that looked very much like blood, poured from the growing seam. More cracks formed, like an egg about to birth a new monstrosity. And then, a single red arm shunted through the first seam.

Misato tore her eyes from the awful image to stare at Ritsuko. The woman was stumbling backwards, mouth open and aghast. "Do you feel like being honest yet, Ritz?" Misato hissed. The woman made no reply, instead thrusting her hand into her mouth and biting down on the knuckle. Misato turned back, to watch as Unit-02 ripped itself free from the dying Angel to fall to the blank expanse below, the flat ground that had once been part of Tokyo-3. It squirmed in the gore for a bit before curling into a fetal position and going still. The Angel screamed one last time, before bursting apart in a cloud of fine, red mist. The cloud dropped, scattering across the city below and covering it in crimson.

Swallowing, Misato un-clipped a radio from her pocket. "This is Maj. Katsuragi," she snapped. "What is the status on the recovery of the Third Child?"

"The Plug has been found, the Third Child is unconscious and in serious condition. We are stabilizing him now," the reply came.

"I need another recovery team deployed immediately. Unit-02 has reappeared in Tokyo-3. I want the Pilot extracted ASAP!"

"Roger, ma'am!" Misato snapped the radio back onto her belt, and glared at Ritsuko. She had gripped a railing for support, and was breathing heavily.

"Are they on our side, Ritz?" Misato asked. "What _are_ these things? Really?" Her friend glanced at her, shook her head, and retreated, stumbling away from the railing. Misato started to follow, but caught herself. She glanced back at the reborn Unit-02, and a wash of copper and iron scent flooded her nostrils. The scent of blood was strong. Misato grimaced. It was everywhere. There was no escape from it.


End file.
